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Old 05-27-2013, 09:34 AM   #106
Comey
College Starter
 
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: CT via PA via CA via PA
Quote:
Originally Posted by Umbrella View Post
I'd like to add my $0.02, if you don't mind. I found myself unexpectedly single after being married 13 years. When I finally decided to date, I realized I had been out of the scene for so long, I had no idea if I had any game, or attractive, or if I was too old, etc. I went through a bunch of disasters before trying online dating.

Luckily, I was able to get some responses, and decided to see if I could at least get a first date with all of them. Mostly for practice, since I was pretty raw. I wasn't picky at all. It was a good thing too, because I screwed up the first few ones. One weekend, I had a first date with a really hot woman on Friday, which I was really psyched about. On Saturday, I had a first date with a woman most people would probably say is average. It was more for something to do on the weekend, and I wasn't serious about her at all.

That was eight years ago, and I am happily married to the average looking woman. She turned out to be funny, smart, knows more about sports than most guys, and is one of the most genuinely nice and cool people I've ever met. I never saw it coming, and I can't believe I lucked out and found her.

You know the old cliche about books and covers. Don't be afraid to date the ones that may not seem attractive. Worst case, you get some practice in dating, which it sounds like you could use. Maybe get a funny story about it. I have a ton of them from some of the dating disasters. Best case, you may find your soulmate. Either way, what do you have to lose, except the cost of the date?

As someone who went through this eight years ago, and had no dating experience outside of one person (I don't consider HS to be really dating), I agree with this wholeheartedly. When I found myself single, after being with one person for my entire dating life, I was totally clueless. I wanted so much to have a meaningful connection to someone, I pushed too hard, and messed up. If I had taken a more relaxed view to things, I might have had different (re: better) results.

Hell, the two women who have really meant something since, I met just by chance; I met my ex-gf, the one I moved to CT for, at a house party in PA in 2007. I met my current girlfriend, with whom I have been with for seven months now, while working an extra shift at the YMCA (she was on an elliptical machine).

You never know what will come your way. This is obvious, but it's easy to overlook.
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