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Co-D'ohs · 02-26-2003, 07:02 PM

Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:

2002 Staff Hiring
We can improve here. I’m sure of it. First let’s look at our syndicate coordinator:

Leland White
Academic Eligibility: Excellent
Syndicate Investigations: Terrific
Solicit Donations: Pretty Good

This guy is a problem. He is clearly the reason that only two players are academically ineligible despite only 10-16% study time. Bye. And following Passacaglia’s excellent suggestion, we shall look for a replacement with high fundraising ability so that our performance rating there stays high enough so that we don’t get fired. I think that messing with bribing recruits can only increase our chances of getting fired, so we’ll look for a strong rating here as well. With a little bit of searching, we find our winner:

Shane Sweeny
Academic Eligibility: Terrible
Syndicate Investigations: Very Good
Solicit Donations: Excellent

Welcome aboard Shane! Just bring in the cash, ok? Don’t worry about anything else!

Let’s go to our Offensive Coordinator:

Wesley Lindsay
Play Calling: Decent
Injury Avoidance: Pretty Good
Rehabilitation: Very Good
Congeniality: Lousy
Quarterbacks: Excellent
Running Backs: Decent
Receivers: Very Good
Offensive Line: Terrible
Kickers: Decent
Wing-Formation: 5 Years

Time to do some major damage. This will be fun. Except for congeniality, we can look for the worst possible guy we can find. And the winner is…

B.J. Brooks
Play Calling: Terrible
Injury Avoidance: Lousy
Rehabilitation: Lousy
Congeniality: Terrific
Quarterbacks: Terrific
Running Backs: Lousy
Receivers: Poor
Offensive Line: Lousy
Kickers: Good
Wing-Formation: 0 Years

This guy was just too much humor to pass up. I stopped looking as soon as I found him. First, his name is BJ; enough said there. Second, take a look at those awesome injury and rehab ratings! This guy is a dream come true! And except for QB and kickers, he is pretty much miserable at his job! Great stuff. This is gonna be so much fun! I am getting so much more excited about the upcoming year. If we can hurt enough players, maybe some of our freshman will play!

We actually decide to keep our defensive coordinator. We played pretty poorly on defense for the #18 team in the nation, and this guy must have played a factor:

Defensive Coordinator
Brain Longfellow
Play Calling: Terrible
Injury Avoidance: Lousy
Rehabilitation: Poor
Congeniality: Good
Defensive Lineman: Decent
Linebackers: Lousy
Secondary: Lousy

We also hire a new New England scout and replace our current Great Lakes scout with a more accurate one, but this stuff is starting to get boring so let’s move on to better things, the schedule! Revenge shall be ours, oh mighty Nebraska!

02-26-2003, 07:02 PM	#3
Co-D'ohs H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Jan 2003	Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz: 2002 Staff Hiring We can improve here. I’m sure of it. First let’s look at our syndicate coordinator: Leland White Academic Eligibility: Excellent Syndicate Investigations: Terrific Solicit Donations: Pretty Good This guy is a problem. He is clearly the reason that only two players are academically ineligible despite only 10-16% study time. Bye. And following Passacaglia’s excellent suggestion, we shall look for a replacement with high fundraising ability so that our performance rating there stays high enough so that we don’t get fired. I think that messing with bribing recruits can only increase our chances of getting fired, so we’ll look for a strong rating here as well. With a little bit of searching, we find our winner: Shane Sweeny Academic Eligibility: Terrible Syndicate Investigations: Very Good Solicit Donations: Excellent Welcome aboard Shane! Just bring in the cash, ok? Don’t worry about anything else! Let’s go to our Offensive Coordinator: Wesley Lindsay Play Calling: Decent Injury Avoidance: Pretty Good Rehabilitation: Very Good Congeniality: Lousy Quarterbacks: Excellent Running Backs: Decent Receivers: Very Good Offensive Line: Terrible Kickers: Decent Wing-Formation: 5 Years Time to do some major damage. This will be fun. Except for congeniality, we can look for the worst possible guy we can find. And the winner is… B.J. Brooks Play Calling: Terrible Injury Avoidance: Lousy Rehabilitation: Lousy Congeniality: Terrific Quarterbacks: Terrific Running Backs: Lousy Receivers: Poor Offensive Line: Lousy Kickers: Good Wing-Formation: 0 Years This guy was just too much humor to pass up. I stopped looking as soon as I found him. First, his name is BJ; enough said there. Second, take a look at those awesome injury and rehab ratings! This guy is a dream come true! And except for QB and kickers, he is pretty much miserable at his job! Great stuff. This is gonna be so much fun! I am getting so much more excited about the upcoming year. If we can hurt enough players, maybe some of our freshman will play! We actually decide to keep our defensive coordinator. We played pretty poorly on defense for the #18 team in the nation, and this guy must have played a factor: Defensive Coordinator Brain Longfellow Play Calling: Terrible Injury Avoidance: Lousy Rehabilitation: Poor Congeniality: Good Defensive Lineman: Decent Linebackers: Lousy Secondary: Lousy We also hire a new New England scout and replace our current Great Lakes scout with a more accurate one, but this stuff is starting to get boring so let’s move on to better things, the schedule! Revenge shall be ours, oh mighty Nebraska!