[Izulde]

[quote=Brian Swartz;3213534]Guess you need to hire Karl 'First of His Name' Kaspar as your real replacement. Everyone knows Sri Lankans are legends and can't truly be replaced … [quote]

Heh. I thought along those lines, too. Well-played, sir.

In a low-level FM game? Who are you kidding?!? I think there's a stipulation in their contract that they HAVE to do that. It's right by the 'make sure you allow a deep cross from near midfield to go in every single promotion playoff final' clause.

Too damned true.

For some moments in life there are no words. No this isn't a Mastercard commercial - for these moments you simply make up your own. Or gargle incoherently. I'm not sure which - it's brilliant in either case.

Thanks. It's my alternative to hurling my keyboard across the room, which I did once. It uh, didn't end well, and I'm so not getting my security deposit back.

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

I'm glad I remembered seeing this ... otherwise I might have gotten a bit of a complex when my bottom feeding UK club got zero applications when posting for a Director of Youth.

Glad it was able to make you feel better in a small, not quite *as* miserable way.

vs Ha Noi FC (4th)
G: Hoang Thanh Tung
D: Nguyen Van Thanh/Phan Anh Tuan/Nguyen Thanh Hai/Dao Tien Dung
MC: Van Von Loi/Idrissa Ngounou (Nigerien - aka Niger not Nigeria)/Dang Anh Tuan
S: Do Van Hau/Selemani Ntibazonakiza/Nguyen Thanh Nam

Interesting note: Players on loan can't play against their parent club. Okay, then!

Grey guy replaces DR at half. Our strikers have been terrible.

47 - Dang Anh Tuan has been amazing at getting the ball back all game, and he does here, too, kicking it up to Thanh Nam. Into the box he goes, and centers to Selemani for his third header goal of the season. 1-0

82 - Anh Koa in for tired Selemani, who just blew a shot and is exhausted. Out goes Ngounou for Nguyen Anh Tuan

Solid for the most part, but we definitely had some weak spots. Van Van Loi and Selemani Ntibazonakiza were the best players with matching 7.3s, Van Loi earning the PotM honors a bit unfairly imo.

Oh, and Ha Noi FC is the high prestige club that I was linked as the favorite to at the end of last season. Note: the database splits Ha Noi FC and Ha Noi FC T&T as two teams, even though what it really is the case is that T&T was the old name, Ha Noi the revised name. There's a couple other clubs that used to play in Ha Noi, but dissolved.

vs Phu Yen FC (2nd)G: Hoang Thanh Tung
D: Nguyen Van Thanh/Phan Anh Tuan/Nguyen Thanh Hai/Dao Tien Dung
MC: Van Van Loi/Nguyen Anh Tuan/Nguyehn Thanh Nam
S: Selemani Ntibazonakiza/Nguyen Anh Koa/Nguyen Thanh Nam

I was tempted to start all three of my strikers, even though Selemani and Do Van Hau are both sub-90%. But I felt like I should rest one, play one. And I wasn't comfortable playing the other loaned in-striker, who isn't a good fit for our roles.

Our midfielders and defenders are both exhausted, but we won't get backline help until the transfer window, and I'm tapped out on central midfield reserves. All of which is a long explanation to say we'll probably lose here, relinquishing our surprise hot start into 1st.

Van Hau replaces Selemani at half, and Dan Anh Tuan does the same for Van Loi, shifting the other two MCs left after the rearrangment.

58 - Nguyen Van Thanh continues to work his DL magic, booting it downfield to Van Hau in the box. Cross, and Nguyen Thanh Nam heads in his first ever Ca Mau score!!! Yes, all 4 of our open field team goals this season have come on headers thus far 1-0

60 - Crap. I forgot to do set piece takers. No problem, as Nguyen Ahn Thanh manages to convert the PK (barely). 2-0

62 - Now that's horseshit. The bar ended our clean sheet streak. Lucky ass damned goal 2-1

74 - Truong Van Hoan comes in for Khoa so that he gets an appearance and his manager doesn't bitch about lack of PT.

We won, but we truthfully didn't deserve it. Nguyen Anh Tuan did become our youngest ever goal scorer, however, at like 8 days shy of turning 17.

@ Binh Phuoc (7th)
G: Hoang Thanh Tung
D: Nguyen Van Thanh/Phan Anh Tuan/Nguyen Thanh Hai/Dao Tien Dung
MC: Van Van Loi/Idrissa Ngounou (Nigerien - aka Niger not Nigeria)/Dang Anh Tuan
S: Do Van Hau/Selemani Ntibazonakiza/Nguyen Anh Koa

My old team is utilizing a 5-4-1 wall, and whilst we'll see Tim Jardon today, Andrew Keen is nowhere to be found. They've gone D-D-L their first three games. We'll do what we were going to do with Keen and Mark/Close Down the lone striker.

4 - Van Hau gets the throw-in from Nguyen Van Thanh and taps back to Van Loi. The shot appears to cross the line, but squirts out again. Ntibazaonakiza (who I'm going to start using his last name, now that I'm memorized it) charges to the ball and the fierce upper shot into the opposite corner of the net gives us our first kicked-in score. 1-0

59 - Out go our two strikers for [b]Nguyen Thanh Nam (the striker version) and Van Hoan respectively. Also sitting is Dang Anh Tuan in favor of the MC version of Nguyen Thanh Nam. Yeah, super confusing.

77 - Van Hoan takes the pass from I forget who and plays a beautiful box feed to Nguyen Thanh Nam (ST). The easy shot is right at the keeper and pushed, but Van Hoan is there to sink the rebound and get his first Ca Mau score! Yay, insurance! 2-0

7.6 PotM for captain Phan Anh Tuan with a 7.1 off the bench by Truong Van Hoan. Solid work all around.

If you'd have told me when I took this job that I'd do the following:

A) Pay someone $25,000 a year.
B) Cut the payroll down to $104.5k while doing A
C) Pay someone else $11,000 a year who wasn't a foreign player
D) Shell out over 1/3rd of our total wage bill to two strikers
E) Revive my 4-3-3 Narrow from Binh Phuoc
F) Win our first four straight games

I'd have said you were insane. E I could understand, because I've noticed I tend to gravitate towards certain formations when playing in a specific nation (See: Antigua & Barbuda in the previous dynasty). But the rest? Oh hellll no.

Bonuses and salary bumps are what's killing us financially (thanks, previous regime!). But if we can keep this up (an implosion is sure to be forthcoming) and advance up... let me put it to you this way:

Insecure Teams V-League 2: 2, with more likely headed that way
Secure Teams V-League 1: 8 teams of 14, and literally no one is Insecure