[Izulde]

So like, I just messaged a bunch of girls on OKCupid, of which only one of them will respond, and I know I'll get a response there because it's somebody I know who's quite the cool chick. Neither one of us is interested in each other like that, though.

I'm not in the mood to work on the novel, and can't sleep, so it's off we go back into FM.

I'm warned again by the FA for bitching about the refs, which makes the board mad at me. Watch me not care.

What the hell? Jimmy McFarlane turns his back on me and says we're not cut out for this level. OH YEAH? YOU'RE ON BLAST!

The growing rivalry between us and AFC Hornchurch continues when I tell the journalist there's no way in hell McFarlane's team is going to stay up.

Salisbury (5th)
GK Jack Turner
DL Nathan Beckett
DC Matt Drage
DC Sam Page
DR Lewis Ferrell
DMC Scott Taylor
ML Reece Hall
MR David Wheeler
AMC Troy Ferguson
ST Luis Cumbers
ST Mario Quiassaca

Not much of a shot of our winning this one most likely, but we'll do our damnedest.

5' - Barrage of shots and one gets through on a sneaky header that looked offsides to me. I hate this game. 0-1

13' - Disallowed goal because this time they get the offsides call right. Yay! We've yet to do anything offensively in the highlights.

40' - Our first offensive highlight when Cumbers heads it up for Quiassaca to chase down, but the shot's a misfire.

At the half, Law comes on for the injured Cumbers, and Beckett is replaced by Worsfold.

49' - Aaaand we leave a guy wide fucking open for the easy score. 0-2

59' - Blown easy shot by Law.

82' - And there go my very faint hopes for a draw. 0-3

85' - Hat trick for Ross Wilson. 0-4

The press conference crackhead thinks *I* signed Lewis Ferrell and I didn't.

Our next opponent has 34 year old Pele as a player on their squad. ...Yeah, we're screwed.

Hayes &W
GK Jack Turner
DL Nathan Beckett
DC Matt Drage
DC Qaeem Sotonwa
DR Robbie Rice
DMC Will Bor
ML Reece Hall
MR David Wheeler
AMC Troy Ferguson
ST Nathan Smart
ST Mario Quiassaca

Yeah we're trying some different things today to see if that will shake things up.

Oh, but before we begin, the board is pleased with my leadership, especially how many young kids I'm giving opportunities to. Um, okay. Whatever you guys say.

14' - We get about 90 billion chances right in front of the frigging goal mouth but nobody is brave enough to take the damned shot.

19' - Home cooking to give Sotonwa a yellow.

34' - Drage puts the ball into row Z to keep us alive.

35' - And Sotonwa is sent off. Fuck you, ref.

Continuing our tradition, Bor is hurt right before the half. Taylor comes on to relieve him and Worsfold subs in for Hall.

47' - Wheeler does a great wheel and puts a nice ball forward for Quiassaca, who promptly half-asses the shot.

49' - Bull dives and Wheeler gets booked. Talk about bullshit.

53' - Cutting through our D like butter and 20 yards out, there's the gamewinner. 0-1

67' - Ferguson got hurt and I missed it somehow. Worsfold gets robbed of a goal by the damn post. We pull Ferguson's spot back from AMC to MC and insert Marcus Moody. Fuck it.

76' - Turner's stupid ass rushes out and there goes our draw hopes. 0-2

We actually didn't play all that badly, all things considered. But our goal differential is ghastly and if we had the 7 points that a drop team does now, we'd be in the relegation zone.

We're playing terribly, all things considered, and will be lucky to stay up. None of the guys I've gotten has been worth anything, and we still can't find a consistent, coherent lineup for anything in the world