[TonyR]

I've been reading and keeping up so thought I should finally post.
I'm Tony, and I'm married to ibnsgirl. We've been married 14 months, and we have a 3 month old (Lucy).

To Qwikshot - my heart and prayers go out to you. I've only had my little one for 3 months, and I know I can't be without her.

As for me, the thing with my parents is mostly my mom. She grew up in a large family, and (imo) regrets not having a big family of her own.
She'd been trying to marry off since I turned 17. Needless to say how much she wanted a grandchild.
She's thinking that I am going to neglect my heritage/background as far as teaching it to Lucy as she grows.
I've already told her once that Lucy was my wife's and mine not hers. It's like she doesn't get it sometimes...oh well, I'll fix it soon enough.

Lee's done the noble thing of being a stay-at-home mom. I could never really tell or show her how much I appreciate that.

The big issues on my mind involve my work. For those that do not know, I'm a Border Patrol Agent stationed in Laredo, Texas.
Laredo is (imo) one of the worst place to raise a family. The city ranks dead last (of the "major" cities) in literacy and education, customer service is non-existant, and there is no "safe" neighborhood anywhere in town.

We get no respect in this town what-so-ever. The laws we enforce are a joke to everybody. We send people to court for smuggling people or drugs, and the worst most people get is probation. The community knows it, and it is very frustraing for me because it makes me feel that doing my job is worthless. I've taken countless criminals off the streets (child molesters, murderers, sex offenders, narcotics trafficers, etc) but most usually end up getting sent back to their country of origion to try and re-enter another day.

I like my job, but I work 50+ hours a week. Lately I've been pulling 11-12 hour days. That in itself is not bad, but I rotate shifts every 4 weeks. That's 4 weeks of days, 4 weeks of evenings, then 4 weeks of mids and start cycle again. To top things off, I never have set days off that are consistant. This week it's two days, next week 2 different days, next week, 2 more different days, etc. I'm afraid that spending all this time at work is making me miss all the things that Lucy is going through. All the little milestones.

I've been trying anything and everything to get out of this place to another federal job. I've spent 4 very hard years with BP. It's a very good job and it's treated me well enough so far, but ever since I found out I was going to be a dad I've been trying to put my family first and get us out of here (No luck so far).

I've been encouraged by several current supervisors that I should put in for supervisor and that I would do a good job at it. I would love the opportunity of promotion, but I would've liked it to be somewhere nicer where I can raise my family. It just seems that more likely you have to be a supervisor to be considered for any type of transfer. Not to mention being a supervisor adds at least another hour and a half to your workday.

Moral at my station is in the pits. It's been said that out of 400 or so agents that work there, over 330 have put in for other jobs. Yet nothing has been done to try and improve moral. The service itself is more focused on recruiting over retention and veiws us all as replaceable.

I'm just trying to be a good provider as well as trying to make sure I raise my family in a healthy environment and I know it will not happen where I am at now.

In anycase, thanks for the thread and for listening.