|
When it is raining, it is because MrBug is sad.
Even MrBug's parrot's advice is insightful.
If there were an interesting gland, MrBug's would be larger than most men's entire lower intestines.
MrBug's shirts never wrinkle.
MrBug is left-handed. And right-handed.
Even if MrBug forgets to put postage on his mail, it gets there.
MrBug once knew a call was a wrong number, even though the person on the other end wouldn't admit it.
You can see MrBug's charisma from space.
The police often question him, just because they find MrBug interesting.
MrBug once punched a magician. That's right. You heard me.
When MrBug orders a salad, he gets the dressing right there on top of the salad, where it belongs...where there is no turning back.
If a monument was built in MrBug's honor, Mt. Rushmore would close, due to poor attendance.
It is said the sun comes up later on the 6th, in case MrBug's Cinco parties run long.
The Mayans prophecized MrBug's birth.
Even lucha libres remove their masks in MrBug's presence.
MrBug once taught a German Shepard to bark in Spanish.
MrBug serves sizzling fajita platters barehanded.
Bulls flat-out refuse to fight MrBug.
MrBug once buried a time capsule full of things that haven't happened yet.
MrBug has been pronounced dead 7 times...make that 8.
MrBug's bear hugs are actually hugs he gives to bears.
MrBug can't be bought, but his beard clippings have been know to show up on auction.
MrBug has never lost a sock.
If MrBug disagrees with you, it is because you are wrong.
People hang on his every word, even the prepositions.
He can speak French...in Russian.
He can disarm you with his looks or his hands. Either way.
His personality is so magnetic he is unable to carry credit cards.
Even his enemies list him as their emergency contact number.
He never says something tastes like chicken. Not even chicken.
He taught a horse to read his email to him.
When he's in Seattle it never rains.
|