Front Office Football Central - View Single Post - The Bill Gates Challenge, Part I: In The Beginning...

Kodos · 04-18-2003, 04:02 AM

By 5 o'clock that night, Bill had collected the best and the brightest in Seattle: Sports writers from the Seattle Post, financial analysts, lawyers - league commissioner Paul Tagliabue was flown in too. Even a medium was brought in to channel Pete Roselle's ghost.

If I can't have the Cowboys, then I will destroy them! I'll pick them apart piece by piece! I will ruin them financially! Jerry Jones will be reduced to selling pencils on the street corner just to eat!

But how?

One of the sports writers suggested buying another NFL team.
A great idea! But which one?

How about Seattle's own, the Seahawks?
Quickly it was noted that they were one of the worst franchises in NFL history. THAT wouldn't bring Bill much prestige.
The Seahawks were out!

How about the Raiders? They're always moving around.
Nope - Al Davis would never let them go, and besides, they were AFC. Bill wanted to compete directly with Mr. Jones and his precious Cowboys.

How about the Rams? They seem to be quite good this year.
No, they need to be in the same division as the Cowboys, you fools!

The Redskins? Daniel Snyder is a moron - maybe he'll sell them cheap!
But, they just built a new stadium recently - they can't be moved for over a decade!
Unacceptable!

Philly?
It was noted that overzealous fans might very well try to kill him in revenge for taking their team. Those guys are animals! They would boo the Pope!
No thanks!

The Giants? They're in the same division. They'd go head-to-head twice a year!
But we need the team to be closer!

Hesitantly, it was pointed out that they have a decrepit stadium; if Bill could get the voters to reject building a new stadium for the Giants, he would be free to move them anywhere. Why, they could even be moved to ... Dallas!

10 minutes and $600 million later, Bill Gates was the proud owner of the New York Football Giants. Everything was starting to come together for Billy Boy...

04-18-2003, 04:02 AM	#2
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	By 5 o'clock that night, Bill had collected the best and the brightest in Seattle: Sports writers from the Seattle Post, financial analysts, lawyers - league commissioner Paul Tagliabue was flown in too. Even a medium was brought in to channel Pete Roselle's ghost. If I can't have the Cowboys, then I will destroy them! I'll pick them apart piece by piece! I will ruin them financially! Jerry Jones will be reduced to selling pencils on the street corner just to eat! But how? One of the sports writers suggested buying another NFL team. A great idea! But which one? How about Seattle's own, the Seahawks? Quickly it was noted that they were one of the worst franchises in NFL history. THAT wouldn't bring Bill much prestige. The Seahawks were out! How about the Raiders? They're always moving around. Nope - Al Davis would never let them go, and besides, they were AFC. Bill wanted to compete directly with Mr. Jones and his precious Cowboys. How about the Rams? They seem to be quite good this year. No, they need to be in the same division as the Cowboys, you fools! The Redskins? Daniel Snyder is a moron - maybe he'll sell them cheap! But, they just built a new stadium recently - they can't be moved for over a decade! Unacceptable! Philly? It was noted that overzealous fans might very well try to kill him in revenge for taking their team. Those guys are animals! They would boo the Pope! No thanks! The Giants? They're in the same division. They'd go head-to-head twice a year! But we need the team to be closer! Hesitantly, it was pointed out that they have a decrepit stadium; if Bill could get the voters to reject building a new stadium for the Giants, he would be free to move them anywhere. Why, they could even be moved to ... Dallas! 10 minutes and $600 million later, Bill Gates was the proud owner of the New York Football Giants. Everything was starting to come together for Billy Boy... Last edited by Kodos : 03-16-2005 at 12:39 AM.