Izulde's Delayed Start (FM 16)

[Izulde]

Originally Posted by bbgunn

Trying to catch up here, but good to see Gunn somewhat contribute even though he's somewhat retired.

Honestly, he was the biggest surprise for me last season, emerging as our second best central defender and earning more PT than he did in the first year. Since we splashed a ton of cash in upgrading our central defense, he's now just a depth/role player, but one I can still slot in comfortably.

@ Gillingham Town (8th)
G: Martin Childs
D: Andy Owens/Clive Jenkins/Josh Powell/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Marcus Casey
M: Jimmy Parker/Eddie Dunne
AM: Sean Coombes
S: Brad Henderson/David Way

12 - Ngamvolou with the longball to Way. Two defenders on him, but he steps to the left and centers to Henderson. It's a bit to trap and control, but then he scorches in the score. 1-0

57 - Parker is completely wrecked on a tackle, but he gets up just in time to get the ball back and play a beautiful feed into box space. Way wins the race and slips the shot home 2-0

59 - Hughes replaces Henderson, who has been awful since that initial goal, and Chibuike subs in for the spotty Owens

Solid all around win, keyed by Marcus Casey's 7.5 and an 8.0 PotM outing from David Way. It's 9th match in a row without a loss to start the Western Premier season.

@ Newport (IOW) (FA Vase Second Qualifying Round)
G: Martin Childs
D: Andy Owens/Clive Jenkins/Josh Powell/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Marcus Casey
M: Jimmy Parker/Eddie Dunne
AM: Sean Coombes
S: Brad Henderson/David Way

We've had hard luck in cup competitions so far in my Sidmouth Town tenure, and I hope today is the day we start bucking that trend.

$1.92k loss last month.

13 - Stunning rainbow by Parker has Way racing into the box. Shot clangs off the crossbar, but the keeper's on the ground and can't get his mitts securely on the ball. As a result, Way literally walks it in! 1-0

33 - Henderson picks up the rocket from Dunne and bounce passes it to Way in the box. Somehow he finds the tiniest of holes in between two defenders and drills the goal home! 2-0

65 - Haig jumps in for Jenkins; Coombes drops to MC to replace tired Parker, Way downshifts to AMC, and Hughes comes on

88 - Our struggles at defending set pieces continues 2-1

Our defense was playing brilliantly right up until that last allowed goal, where we tanked from a bunch of 7+ performances to below that. As a result, at the end of the game, only PotM David Way's 8.8 is a highlight.

We pocketed $1.34k for that victory.

vs Oldland Abbotonians (Western League Les Phillips Cup Second Round)
G: Martin Childs
D: Andy Owens/Kevin Haig/Clive Jenkins/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Marcus Casey
M: Sean Coombes/Jimmy Parker
AM: David Way
S: Lewis Hughes/Brad Henderson

35 - Striker curse continues as Henderson is hurt. We switch to a 5-4-1 Diamond Narrow, with Way up front, Coombes at AMC, Ryan in at MC, and Knight getting his first taste of action as the 3rd DC

43 - It's right around the time Haig own goals that I realize I was stupid in that change. I didn't need to sit Hughes - I could have kept a 4-1-2-1-2 DM formation and not burned a sub. Fuck me. 0-1

54 - Our whole team has been playing like ass, but here Ryan makes a stunning sliding tackle. Way retrieves the ball, runs downfield, and crosses far side to Parker. Our star loanee got butthurt when I yelled at him at half, and he takes revenge by dribbling around the defense into the box and slamming the equalizer 1-1

68 - Fuck it. I spend my last sub switching Owens for Chibuike. The Nigerian-English kid is going to start next game, because I haven't been happy with Owens the last few matches.

My assman wants me to yell at the team for a disappointing performance at the end of regulation. I'm like WTF we came back for a draw. So I'm more positive than that, and the whole team is all "Looks to gain confidence".

103 - We injure two of their players back to back, and I don't see any subs, so we have a 2 man advantage , I think?

118 - Ngamvolou throws into Jenkins for the monster shot all the down to Way just outside the box. He dribbles in, and despite his complete awful game prior to this (6.4), he comes up with late heroics in spearing the diagonal shot! 2-1

And so ends the weirdest game of my FM career. We bounced back in a huge way - 7.5 for Clive Jenkins, 7.8 for Marcus Casey, 8.6 PotM from Jimmy Parker, 8.1 by Sean Coombes, and 7.5 off the bench by Leigh Ryan. Not at all happy about the 6.1 from Kevin Haig, but I'll let that shit go because we won.

That's also 6 wins in a row, a new club record! Brad Henderson is out for 2 weeks.

@ Welton Rovers (18th)
G: Martin Childs
D: Ifeanyi Chibuike/Josh Powell/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Marcus Casey
M: Tom Manning/Jimmy Parker/Eddie Dunne
AM: Sean Coombes
S: Lewis Hughes/David Way

47 - Fucking Chibuike. I yank him immediately for Dafydd after that lazy shit 0-1

54 - Powell is out for Haig

73 - We fucking 0-2

75 - Suck ass 0-3

"Whatever the Welton Rovers manager said to his players at half worked". Go fuck yourself in the ass. My guys were all green, too. We crash to 2nd on goal differential.

Leigh Ryan gets hurt and is out 3-4 weeks.

[Izulde]

@ Saltash (6th)
G: Martin Childs
D: Andy Owens/Clive Jenkins/Josh Powell/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Marcus Casey
M: Jimmy Parker/Eddie Dunne
AM: Sean Coombes
S: Liam Hughes/David Way

40 - Oh, look! Fucking screw up defending a corner kick. Our strikers are also shanking the ball like whores yank dicks 0-1

Owens is out at half for Chibuike. My kingdom for a DL who isn't a trashlord.

46 - Hughes kicks back to Parker for the long ball to Way. Into box, dribble, and my halftime screams in his ears, this time he doesn't miss. 1-1

52 - Back a month ahead of schedule is Jackson, who goes in for Hughes

84 - Ngamvolou laterals to Parker and the high ball into space is there for Jackson to pick up and run with. Twice now he's had shots blocked, but this third time is charmed because the defenders can't catch him, and there's my boy with the go-ahead goal!! 2-1

8.1 for Marcus Casey, 7.6 for Jimmy Parker, and an 8.1 PotM sub outing for Nicky Jackson, long may he wear the green, red, and white.

I've been mentioned for a few openings, and again I'm linked to Gloucester, but their finances are a mess, so no. Nicky Jackson shows me love after the game, and I'm just like, the feeling is mutual, bruh.

It's early in the season, but a clear Top 3 has emerged: Barnstaple, us, and Cribbs, the last of which just got a new owner. Beverley Town was again projected to win it all, but they've hit a cold streak, and are 7th. Luke Connolly has consolidated himself as an Icon there, by the way. Only he moved to Lincoln United last season for $5.5k.

vs Frome (20th)
G: Martin Childs
D: Ifeanyi Chibuike/Clive Jenkins/Josh Powell/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Marcus Casey
M: Jimmy Parker/Eddie Dunne
AM: Sean Coombes
S: Lewis Hughes/David Way

3 - FUCK.YOU.REF. WAY WAS ONSIDES!!!!

At half, Coombes replaces Dunne, Way slides down to AMC, and Jackson comes on.

73 - Haig in for tired Casey

81 - Sucking today Way pops it high and up for equally shitty Hughes. Lateral back to Way in the box, and he laterals to out of nowhere Coombes for his first Vikings score!!! 1-0

Clive Jenkins was PotM with a 7.6, but I felt like overall we were better than that. And we're in 1st place! How tight is the table, BTW?

Western Premier (12 games played)
Sidmouth Town - 29 points
Cribbs - 28 points
Barnstaple - 27 points
Hallen - 19 points
Buckland - 19 points

So yeah. 8 point difference between 3rd and 4th.

Oh, and 122 people showed up to the Frome game, breaking our old club record. Sweet.

vs Clevdon (17th)
G: Martin Childs
D: Ifeanyi Chibuike/Clive Jenkins/Kevin Haig/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Marcus Casey
M: Jimmy Parker/Eddie Dunne
AM: Sean Coombes
S: Nicky Jackson/David Way

9 - Another fucking set piece goal given up 0-1

25 - Haig hits the corner to Jenkins head, and with a bar assist, he gets his first Vikings goal and we get a fucking rare as a 10 girl set piece goal of our own 1-1

51 - Henderson in for Jackson as we spend a shit ton of money trying to get a win. Gunn goes in for Dunne

67 - Gunn with the clutch interception and long ball to Way. Two defenders are on him, so he crosses into the box, where a flying Henderson earns his dolla dollla bills with a fierce strike!!! 2-1

7.7 for Kevin Haig, 7.8 for Clive Jenkins, and matching 7.0 performances for Andrew Gunn and Brad Henderson off the bench. PotM was on other team, but we retain the lead. Meanwhile Barnstaple lost, opening up a 5 point cushion on them.

"Smoke and mirrors keep us waiting on a miracle" - yes, Justin, it still feels like smoke and mirrors that's got us in the miracle position of 1st

vs Deeping Rangers (FA Vase 1st Round)
G: Martin Childs
D: Ifeanyi Chibuike/Clive Jenkins/Josh Powell/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Kevin Haig
M: Jimmy Parker/Marcus Casey
AM: David Way
S: Brad Henderson/Nicky Jackson

Uncharted territory for the Sidmouth Town Vikings - actually playing in the first round of an FA trophy tournament. To celebrate (and because of health issues), we're splashing the cash.

52 - I forgot to adjust my subs, so it's Gunn in for Parker and midfield switch

57 - It's been a rare bad night for Jenkins, so he sits for Dayfdd

Very unlucky to not get a win here, so it's on to a replay at their house.

Marcus Casey receives a one match ban to yellow card accumulation, which just so happens to be the replay. Great.

Even without the win money, we still pull a $1.04k profit for the month - our first true profit of the year.

[Izulde]

Damn right you're delighted with me, board. I'm the only one.

Lulz. Pierce Mitchell a backup who never reached his potential as a tutor for one of our youth scrubs? Yeah, sure, why not?

@ Deeping Rangers (FA Vase First Round Replay)
G: Martin Childs
D: Ifeanyi Chibuike/Clive Jenkins/Sam Dafydd/Stephane Ngamvolou
DM: Andrew Gunn
M: Jimmy Parker/Eddie Dunne
AM: Sean Coombes
S: Lewis Hughes/Brad Henderson

9 - Set piece goal? Fucking yep. 0-1

14 - Hughes snags the 35 yard pass from someone I forget who and kicks it back to Coombes who charges in for the equalizer goal. 1-1

56 - Chibuike to DR, Dafydd to DL, Powell at DC; Haig replaces Parker

74 - Someday i'll know what it's like to get money from two rounds in Cup play. Won't be today. Fucking hell 1-2

I'm too drunk to keep playing.

[Izulde]

So in a fucking rage, I lost the report of a shit ton of games. Long story short, we started playing like complete fucking ass. Dropped to 3rd place, blew a 2-0 lead to Barnstaple in the Les Phillips Cup Third Round, get hit with a shit ton of injuries, and I resigned rather than break my keyboard. Everyone is stunned by my decision, but I just couldn't do it anymore. It stopped being fun seeing us constantly not perform up to expectations.

Shockingly, the Vikings manage to get to 1st place under Ryan Dovell's leadership, with two draws and win, before they hire Steve Chaplain away from higher division Woodford United.

But then another team in the division opens up, and I'm intrigued enough to take it - especially with how much money they're willing to pay me.


Cadbury Heath Heathens
Cadbury Heath is a small town of 3,100 in the area of South Gloucestershire in England, so it's moving back inland. Originally I was going to wait for an opportunity overseas, but $24,000 - 6 times what I made at Sidmouth Town - convinced me to sign up. That and the low expectations to avoid relegation.

As of right now, the Heathens are 17th on goal differential (18th is relegated), and are spending way too much money on payroll. I start by booting the Head of Youth Development and transfer listing almost everyone.

Bank Balance: -$2,600
Season Ticket Price: $150
Season Ticket Holders: 9
Club Value: $40k
Stadium: 1,000 (Owned by Club)
Usual suck at everything

@ Sherborne (6th)
G: Pat Meacher
D: Colin Gibson/Cameron Hough/Leon Murray
M: Tom Bates/Tim Baldwin/Danny Elliott/Joe Sole
AM: Darren Lloyd
S: Steve Hutchings/Joe Rose

We'll review the team more once I shuffle things around, but right now, this is looking like our best lineup.

6 - Hutchings centers to Lloyd. Pass into the box, and Rose is in to strike it home! 1-0

20 - Yep. Same guy who gave us trouble in a Sidmouth Town loss 1-1

32 - And we're on that guy constantly and we still can't stop him. 1-2

50 - Karl Cureton at DC; Kenny Ward for Hutchings

60 - And there's Nathan Pinney's hat trick. 1-3

74 - Stinking on set pieces follows me everywhere 1-4

81 - Consolation goal by Ward after a fantastic feed from Rose. Lot of work to do. 2-4

We fall to last place, and Sidmouth Town has taken advantage of downturns by Cribbs and Barnstaple to surge to a 7 point lead.

No one gets any transfer offers, and they all refuse to leave. As a result, we make loan offers to every player out there worth $6k or more, just to get more guys in here who don't suck. I also adjust my asking price for transfers.

Transferring Out
GK Gavin Adams - $0
GK Nic Marker - $0

Loan Ins
ML/AML Casey Phillips
ML/AML - Dean Turner
DM/DRC/MC Adam Pheasant
ST Callum Wiltshere
DR Peter Clark - The only guy who'd legitimately start on this crap team so far
ST Geraint Richards - Decent third string dude
MC/AMC Louis Mills
MC/DM Billy Morris
DC/DM/MC Nigel Jones

Now that I've caused all this chaos, I resign before our next game, because fuck this midseason bullshit. I then go on vacation until July 14th, having collected 2 weeks' paycheck.

By the time I'm back from vacation in June, Ashton & Blackwell United have stunned everyone by storming ahead in the second half of the season to take the title by 10 points over Cribbs, with Sidmouth Town placing a respectable 3rd. They picked up Harry Pritchard, a 28 year old left winger, from Guernsey, as their lone notable addition for the second half. Cadbury Heath relegated first, the dumpster fire one that simply couldn't be saved.

Unfortunately, it's a dry summer for jobs, despite adding two leagues that I think could be interesting to play in. Or maybe I just have the windows wrong. I'm not adverse to staying in England if the right situation comes up, either.

Beverley Town won the Northern Counties East Premier last season, and in the early going are in playoff contention in the Northern Premier First Division North, but years of overspending have caught up to them, and they're now Insecure financially. They're expected to finish 2nd. Meanwhile, Sidmouth Town is supposed to win it all this season.

The start of October, and the Vikings are destroying everyone out there. Still because of my guys, too. I'm proud of what the club is achieving after me, that's for damn sure.

I missed the $10 buy-in window for FM17, so we'll stick with FM16. Still no clubs appealing to me. Beverley Town is sinking without trace - 10th in the league when I look at a team with an opening in their league.

I did find a club with a cool kit in England that I'm tempted by. Might be a Cadbury Heath situation, and they're carrying loan debt, but we'll see if they intrigue me enough to sign on.

On second thought, I'm not really feeling that club, so I walk away - especially since a higher division club just opened up in an alternate league. One of the other leagues lowest division teams just opened up, but I'm not exactly thrilled by it, so I'm going to chop that league for next season.

Mid-November opens up much more fascinating opportunities, and I elect to take one.


Burscough Linnets
They won the FA Trophy in 2003 and were a Vanarama North/South team as recently as 2008-09, but have since fallen on hard times and play in the Northern Premier Division One North. Currently, the Linnets are facing a relegation battle, and are $10.2k over budget with a staggering $539k in debt.

Burscough itself is a small town under 10,000 in West Lancashire. Developed originally as a fishing village, it's grown rapidly recently and suffers from considerable congestion.

The board blocks my mutual termination of youth players due to lack of funds - that's the ones I don't piss off by trying to dump them. The team flips their shit when I transfer list a key player, but he's making way too much cash.

A bloody swath cuts through the staff, as I'm looking to have much better people in charge than the flotsam here.

The board blocks my new assman because we can't afford the payroll bloat. WTF?!?! I instantly release all youth players on frees only I can't, because the board blocks those, too! Fine. I offer them all to clubs for nothing. I do the same with every senior player making more than $2.2k a year.

It's just LOL worthy, so I'm not even going to report on matches until we get the wage budget under control. We do manage to get a massive upgrade at Scout, though.

Amidst all the drama and wailing, we secure a 3-1 win in my first match, with my 3-1-3-2 DM formation from Beverley Town and a coach picking my team. Not enough to get us out of the relegation hole, but enough to move to the second to last drop spot, out of the safety zone on goal differential. Our opponent's manager is fired after that game.

One of our top wage earners leaves on a free after that one, which puts us in payroll surplus and hopefully enough to get my assman choice on board. We also extend two guys whose loans were about to expire who were clearly two of the better dudes at the club.

After we get that amazing assman, everything but the keepers are at 2* training, with 2.5* defending training the highlight.

[Izulde]

Club Founded: 1946
Stadium: Victoria Park - 2,500 capacity - 270 seated (Club owned)
Average Ticket Price: $12
Season Ticket Price: $150
Season Ticket Holders: 9
Fierce Rivals: Skelmersdale
Other Rivals: Prescot, Southport

2 Legends, 3 Icons, 2 Favored Players

Stadium was clearly from the glory days of Conference North/South. Our average attendance has been 193 this season.

We pull off an absolutely stunning 2-1 upset of the #2 team in the league when they come to our place, and that's enough to pull us up out of the drop zone with 3 points clear. There's 42 games in league play, and at 23, we're just barely halfway through - I literally took over at the halfway mark and delivered 2 wins in 2 games against better competition.

Loan In - GK Carl Freakes (21) - From Radcliffe Boro
13 Handling and 11 Decisions. Not a huge upgrade by any means over what we have now, but enough that I'm willing to give him a crack in the net. 1*/4* means he's probably not going to reach his potential, but we'll see.

Parent club chase fails. Boo. Trial Day is out the window due to financial difficulties.

I have to use a 3-3-1-3 formation in our next match due to our lone DR getting suspended 2 games because of yellows accumulation. Ghastly officiating, and a 4.4 performance from one of our defenders translates to an 0-4 loss. And one of the defenders is an appearance away from getting a pay bump, so I have to make sure not to start him.

4-4-1-1 just because for the next game. We eke out the 1-0 home upset - important because the teams below us won, too.

Transfer In - ST Andrew Baines (18) - From Altrincham - $2.5k salary
He'd only sign to the end of this season, but 13 Finishing, 10 Composure, 13 Determination, 13 Work Rate, 10 Acceleration... there's a lot to like about this kid my assman rates as a 2.5/4* player. Professional player, too, as I'm working on only bringing in positive personality guys.

I forgot my old club Beverley Town is in this league, too. They're in the midst of takeover talks as we head to our rival game against Skelmersdale. We promptly embarrass ourselves 0-4. I don't like this team, I don't like this town, and I quit. On to vacation until April.

But there's no job openings I like, and it drags on through a long, tedious summer. I try to get my job at Sidmouth Town back when I see my replacement is Insecure, but they re-upped him despite a collapse to 2nd place again.

It's about that time I decide to shut this dynasty down and start off with something much more interesting.