Kid(s) leaving home - support group

[Edward64]

I think my son got his job in Oct after graduating in May. But this was in 2022 so when pandemic uncertainties was still going on.

FWIW I suggest he focus on job vs location. After 2-3 years he’ll be more marketable and can pick and choose.

[Edward64]

Welp, daughter graduated this week.

She's already gotten a PT job (she's done work there before and they like her) which she says will allow her to work up to 40 hours. It's in her area of studies and she enjoys it.

No benefits though so she'll stay on our health for now. She knows it's not a long term job, just for the experience and the CV.

Biggest challenge is for her and girlfriend to find a new apartment that is approx. mid distance to both of their jobs. Not looking forward to that as it'll be closer to Atlanta.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by Edward64

Biggest challenge is for her and girlfriend to find a new apartment that is approx. mid distance to both of their jobs.

North, South, East, or West?

[GrantDawg]

Congrats! We are still gearing up for the journey to Simon's graduation June 1st.

[Ksyrup]

Caitlin graduated with her first master's in education. Starting on #2 this summer.

Mack's home for the summer. Today is her 20th, so we're officially without a teenager.

[Edward64]

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

North, South, East, or West?

So somewhere a little north of I-75 and I-285.

[Edward64]

Originally Posted by Ksyrup

Caitlin graduated with her first master's in education. Starting on #2 this summer.

A 2nd Masters?

[Ksyrup]

That's what she wants.

One, she loves being a student (and she's paying, so...); two, every advanced degree bumps her teacher salary and given that KY is 41st or 42nd in teacher pay (and falling) and just blew off the Governor's attempt to substantially invest in education here - while at the same time moving forward with steps to completely eliminate the state income tax as if we're some desireable vacation destination like FL or AZ - she's basically taking matters into her own hands; and (3) it gives her an alternate avenue to remain in education outside of the classroom, which is her goal.

[Edward64]

Nice.

We offered daughter graduate school and she said no, she wanted to start working.

[Ksyrup]

She's doing both. She's been a full-time teacher for 2 years and doing the Masters work online in her "spare time." She ended up with a 4.0. I think 4 years of balancing college classwork with softball made it a pretty easy transition to juggling school and work.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by Edward64

So somewhere a little north of I-75 and I-285.

{nods} I asked just on the slim chance it might be in an area where I'd have a useful brainstorm.

Alas ... etc etc

[GrantDawg]

Originally Posted by Edward64

So somewhere a little north of I-75 and I-285.

I was out there the other day, and there are so many apartment options. I just hate to guess what they go for.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by GrantDawg

I was out there the other day, and there are so many apartment options. I just hate to guess what they go for.

Yeah, that's the part that (if I'm completely candid) had my actual reaction being "welp ... they're fucked"

[GrantDawg]

We will be leaving in the morning for the long drive to Williamstown for my son's graduation. It still feels unreal. We are breaking up the trip both going and coming back with an overnight stay in Virginia. Originally we were going to take my Daughter's SUV (she and her husband is going with us), but we decided to rent a min-van to give us more room. 16 hours each way is a long ride. It is going to be an interesting week.

[Passacaglia]

Looks like this thread was around in times I wasn't on the board, but it's pretty timely to have been bumped now. I'd love thoughts on this.

We've got three kids who just finished 8th, 6th, and 6th grades. We live near Chicago now, and we're thinking of moving back to the Detroit area, with the primary reason being that there are more options at various levels for our kids to go to college while still living at home.

I'll have to read the whole thread, but so far from the first page, I can't help but think "it shouldn't have to be this way" as I'm reading the posts.

[GrantDawg]

In a most class of 2024 way, the commencement speaker for Simon's graduation wasn't able to be here because he has Covid. This class had most of their high school graduation canceled in 2020 and had much of their early college experience remotely, so a remote commencement speaker is somehow sadly fitting.

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[Edward64]

My daughter had a college graduation ceremony. It was good.

There was not valedictorian speech though but not sure if her college has those or if they cancelled them because of the recent controversial stuff. I was surprised as how quickly & efficiently they got it done.

Couple interesting notes. There were a lot of MBAs, more than undergrad business! Our theory is a lot of night school working adults. There were also maybe 8 PhDs and the majority of them were in "international conflict management".

[JonInMiddleGA]

So later today (since it's now Saturday) we leave for Miami with two loaded vehicles. But this time, ain't but one of us ain't expected back here again for any extended time.

I sure have spent a lot of time in this thread over the years.

Between Covid during his undergrad years, my wife's illness and passing during postgrad, and then the extended break between his off-cycle graduation & the start of his job (they only do two intakes a year), he's had an unusual amount of time being home for extended periods while technically being "away". But, barring misfortune, not anymore.

I think we're both dealing with this with a bit of denial frankly, since he really goes this time with a short term (7 month) lease before -- hopefully -- this house sells & we both buy permanent residences in Miami. But, yeah, I'm pretty acutely aware that this is kind of "it" too.

I dread the next 10 days (we leave tomorrow, I return in a split drive starting a week from Sunday) like the proverbial beating. Physically, mentally, emotionally.

On the one hand, I can't be TOO distraught. In some respects I almost feel guilty that I'm not MORE wrecked. He's not only getting out of here but he's going where he wants to be. I've likened it to someone escaping Auschwitz but the one left behind sending them a postcard afterwards saying "wish you were here". I'm a prick but I ain't THAT big a prick.

On the other hand, deep down, I know I'm coming back here - for however long - to a really big house that's gonna be really fucking empty.

[Ksyrup]

That's tough man. But at least you've got a plan to remedy the situation even if it's a bit of a long-term fix.

Mack went back this past week to her new apartment even school doesn't start for another 10 days or so. We've gotten pretty used to the college send-off so no big deal, and she's less than an hour from home, but this time it su is simply because my wife's still recovering from hip surgery and I don't have any help. We've leaned on her parents too much so I'm trying not to do things like ask them to be here by 7am so I can go to work. Thankfully I can work from home so it's not a major issue but I'm being run ragged during the work day.

[cougarfreak]

I am officially becoming part of the group today. Taking my oldest to Western Kentucky University to begin her college journey. As a high school principal, keeping eyes on my kids while they’re been there is one of the joys i’ve experienced. I’ve intentionally stayed out of their stuff at school, but watching them grow up there has been a lot of fun.


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[Ksyrup]

WKU is a great school. Really nice campus, decent size city with a lot of stuff but not big in any sense, and equidistant from both Louisville and Nashville.

[Edward64]

Congrats, welcome to the club.

You’ll be depressed for a little while, then acceptance sets in for the next chapter. Hang in there

[Atocep]

My son is leaving for school today. He was looking at Seattle U, which is a D1 program and a great school, but playing time for baseball was up in the air. The upside was the great degree and he could stay at home for a semester or so and save money. He has 2 years of eligibility plus a redshirt left so the plan was to see how he liked it for a year and if he didn't see the field he could either transfer or stay for the degree.

Then for the past week he's been talking to Hastings College in Nebraska about playing there as they have a huge need for a catcher with their top 2 leaving the program. He got accepted this morning but was told he had to be in person by Tuesday so we're packing him up today and my wife is driving with him the 24 hours to get there and then she's flying back. It's an NAIA that's had a rough few years but have a new coach coming in.

His major is going to be Sports Exercise Science, which he wants to use to get into coaching after baseball or look at working someplace like driveline and using that to springboard into coaching.

[Ksyrup]

The rare post that feels equally at home in either this or the Potus 2024 or Biden Presidency threads.

I chose this one because I feel like we all can relate, on a much smaller level. This is from the new Woodward book:

Woodward also describes a scene between father and son at the White House in the spring of 2022. The president was having dinner with a friend, when Hunter Biden came in, sat down and began talking about why he was the person with the most to lose from the midterm elections.

“Hunter rambled on about his personal crisis,” Woodward writes. “President Biden leaned back in his chair, closed his eyes and sighed.”

[flere-imsaho]

Haha that's awesome....

[Edward64]

Kids nowadays.

Want to transfer 2024 Corolla car title to daughter. She has an accident on file and the cheapest auto quote was about $320 a month (ouch). A little too expensive.

We talked and she is okay with a $210 estimate if she gets my 2007 Camry. We offered to pay for her annual auto for the next year but she declined. Respect that she wants to go at it alone but can't help but feel there's a little too much pride here. But oh well.

Only thing we are helping her out on now is health insurance. She is still on ours until she ages out at 27.

[Ksyrup]

You in the US? I think it's 26. Caitlin turns 26 next August and she has to be off of our health policy by the end of that month, I think. She's coordinating it with her work (she stayed on ours because her job gave her a $2100 health expense card if she didn't get on their insurance plan).

[Edward64]

Yes, you’re right. Age out at 26