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Old 03-01-2012, 12:13 PM   #651
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I bet that's what happened to Nick Shrimpton.
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Old 03-01-2012, 12:20 PM   #652
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Meth Addict Accidentally Burns Down World's Fifth-Oldest Tree (Updated)

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I can't believe I burned down a tree older than Jesus. - hilarious meth addict (to her friends).
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Old 03-01-2012, 12:30 PM   #653
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That story is complete with a mugshot of the dog, btw. That is fuckin' hilarious.

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Accused: Robert Aucker, left, was held after allegedly driving out to a pre-arranged location intending to watch his lover have sex with a Golden Shepherd (right: stock image)

Its a stock image of a dog, that's even better IMO.
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Old 03-01-2012, 12:53 PM   #654
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Gives new meaning to the term 'dogging'.



Don't ask...
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Old 03-01-2012, 01:02 PM   #655
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Why was Emperor Palpatine in a cop car?
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Old 03-01-2012, 01:48 PM   #656
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Because he's been a naughty sith.
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Old 03-01-2012, 03:10 PM   #657
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What. The. Shit.

Euthanasia Coaster - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
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It's hard to throw a good shot with a drunk blonde wrapped around me.
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I don't think I'd stop even if I found a dick.
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Old 03-01-2012, 03:20 PM   #658
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I imagine sales of the mid-drop pictures wouldn't be as brisk as the usual roller coaster.
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Old 03-01-2012, 03:32 PM   #659
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Jewish high school team gets restraining order to play - ESPN Dallas
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Old 03-01-2012, 04:19 PM   #660
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TAPPS was the athletic league my high school was affiliated with. I also saw elsewhere that the game will be played at Nolan, my alma mater.
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Old 03-01-2012, 09:04 PM   #661
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How do (did) we know it's the world's fifth oldest tree?

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Old 03-01-2012, 09:07 PM   #662
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How do (did) we know it's the world's fifth oldest tree?

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I think it is kinda like being Al-Qaeda's second-in-command.
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Old 03-01-2012, 09:41 PM   #663
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I think it is kinda like being Al-Qaeda's second-in-command.

No, it's always the third in command. For the longest time, you always knew Bin Laden was #1 and al-Zawahiri #2. But #3- the military has killed like 50 of them.

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Old 03-02-2012, 11:40 AM   #664
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This must be the designer's warm-up act:

New winged roller coaster ‘the Swarm’ rips the arms off crash test dummies | The Sideshow - Yahoo! News
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Old 03-02-2012, 01:40 PM   #665
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Truck Fire Burns More Than Ton Of Butter On Ky. Interstate - Cincinnati News Story - WLWT Cincinnati
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Old 03-02-2012, 09:16 PM   #666
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You can now buy an entire house from IKEA. Not just the furniture, but the whole entire house.

Home Sales: Now You Can Buy an Entire House from IKEA | NewsFeed | TIME.com
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Old 03-03-2012, 10:55 AM   #667
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Hackers Elect Futurama's Bender to the Washington DC School Board | PCWorld

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Old 03-03-2012, 05:29 PM   #668
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Mars Hill church again a source of controversy | Local & Regional | Seattle News, Weather, Sports, Breaking News | KOMO News

check out the contract and letter sent to the congregation.
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Old 03-03-2012, 07:49 PM   #669
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Wow, what morons. What I find even more interesting is that his fiancee isn't even mentioned even though the article states he had sex with her.
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Old 03-06-2012, 04:29 PM   #670
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Meet the Oklahoma high school basketball player who can play defense in her sleep | NewsOK.com
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Old 03-08-2012, 12:23 AM   #671
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Lawmaker wants to end public assistance to lottery winners - CNN.com
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Old 03-08-2012, 12:53 AM   #672
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Asked if she had the right to the public assistance money, Clayton answered, "I kind of do. I have no income, and I have bills to pay. I have two houses."

Fantastic.
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Old 03-08-2012, 01:58 PM   #673
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Here's a free life lesson. If a guy with road rage gets out of his car, and cracks your windshield with a karate chop, for the love of God don't roll down your window, because your face is likely next.

http://www.wusa9.com/news/local/stor...storyid=195334
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Old 03-12-2012, 02:47 PM   #674
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THERE MIGHT BE A BILL & TED 3 | MetalSucks
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It's hard to throw a good shot with a drunk blonde wrapped around me.
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I don't think I'd stop even if I found a dick.
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Old 03-15-2012, 09:55 AM   #675
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This is bizarre - a a bunny makes headlines in Germany for being born without ears, and in the course of all the publicity about him, he's killed by a cameraman who accidentally stepped on him.

It's like the Circle of [Media] Life


In this photo taken Wednesday, March 14, 2012, a two-week old earless bunny sits on the hands of a keeper at the zoo in Limbach-Oberfrohna, eastern Germany. The bunny that was a rising star on Germany's celebrity animal scene had its 15 minutes of fame brought to an abrupt end when he was accidentally stepped on by a television cameraman. The fate of 17-day-old Til the bunny with a genetic defect was plastered across German newspapers on Thursday, the same day a small zoo in Saxony was to have presented him to the world at a press conference. The unidentified cameraman who had been filming the bunny in its enclosure Wednesday told Bild he hadn't seen Til, who had buried himself in hay, when he took a step backward. (AP Photo/dapd, Uwe Meinhold)
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Last edited by Ksyrup : 03-15-2012 at 09:56 AM.
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Old 03-15-2012, 11:38 AM   #676
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He was filiming him, and yet somehow missed that he went into the hay? Way to go, cameraman.
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Old 03-15-2012, 11:42 AM   #677
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I think the cameraman was just hungry for some hasenpfeffer.
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Old 03-19-2012, 03:38 PM   #678
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Law firm fires 14 employees for wearing orange shirts | The Sideshow - Yahoo! News
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Old 03-19-2012, 04:09 PM   #679
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wow, that is terrible.

I always wonder who makes these decisions without realizeing the massive amount of negative publicity they will receive.
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Old 03-19-2012, 04:11 PM   #680
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Right to work, kids!

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Houston Hippopotami, III.3: 20th Anniversary Thread - All former HT players are encouraged to check it out!

Janos: "Only America could produce an imbecile of your caliber!"
Freakazoid: "That's because we make lots of things better than other people!"


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Old 03-19-2012, 04:11 PM   #681
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It's a law office. That's like going from a -10 to a -12.5 in publicity.
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Old 03-19-2012, 05:18 PM   #682
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Knock, knock
Who's there
Orange
You're fired!
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Old 03-19-2012, 06:02 PM   #683
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Unless there's a part of the story we haven't seen, you'd think the executive that did the firing after being told why they were wearing orange, that he'd change his mind.

However, since he's never lost a case, I'm sure he won't change his mind.
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Old 03-19-2012, 06:29 PM   #684
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Unless there's a part of the story we haven't seen, you'd think the executive that did the firing after being told why they were wearing orange, that he'd change his mind.


anyone who is that big of an insecure douchebag certainly won't admit they were wrong.
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Old 03-19-2012, 06:35 PM   #685
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anyone who is that big of an insecure douchebag certainly won't admit they were wrong.

Agreed. I wouldn't be surprised if one of those people that were fired, was his mom.
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Old 03-21-2012, 10:51 AM   #686
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Naples man arrested at bank claims he's CIA director, half orangutan » Naples Daily News
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Old 03-21-2012, 10:58 AM   #687
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Posted that one about a month ago.
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Old 03-21-2012, 11:00 AM   #688
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Shit, this is March, not February. I need more coffee.
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Old 03-22-2012, 05:33 PM   #689
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Is it the Chinese Alfred Molina?

Chinese gangster’s ‘stolen’ cell phone pictures going viral | The Sideshow - Yahoo! News
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Old 03-23-2012, 12:15 PM   #690
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Not really a news story, but strange

Be A Doll: Personalized Action Figures/Dolls
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Old 03-23-2012, 06:20 PM   #691
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Those look horrible. Paul McCartney looks homeless.
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Old 03-31-2012, 03:18 PM   #692
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http://www.alligator.org/sports/bask...a4bcf887a.html

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Old 04-05-2012, 08:45 PM   #693
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How do you say 'brains' in Russian?

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/technolo...232522297.html
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Old 04-09-2012, 11:12 AM   #694
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This isn't all that strange, but certainly it's incredibly painful.

Ex-Girlfriend Busted For Brutal Scrotum Attack | The Smoking Gun

The real reason I posted this was because he had his scrotum nearly torn off and he was transported to Ball Memorial Hospital. Talk about a doomed trip. "Tske me anywhere but there, please!"
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Old 04-10-2012, 03:25 PM   #695
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Metro police shocked by man's wild crime spree - WSMV Channel 4

Some funny stuff in this article:

Officers said Todd broke into the Slaughterhouse and stole a Taser, revolver and shotgun. Then, they said he shot the business up, stole a T-shirt and set the business on fire.

Police said Todd then found four people leaving a local bar. He held them at gunpoint, tased one, pistol whipped another, then took off with their cash and credit cards.

Five minutes later investigators said Todd carjacked a cab at gunpoint, then headed off to commit fraud, and used his newly acquired stolen credit cards to buy food.

"He was able to find the Walmart on Nolensville. He goes there and purchased $199 worth of items," said Blackburn.

Next stop: Hotel Indigo at 6 a.m.

Police said Todd broke into a law office there, ransacked the business then defecated on a desk, smearing feces on some of the framed law degrees.

He then knocked on several hotel room doors pretending to be a female housekeeper.
In one case, police said Todd stole $600 from a Canadian couple at gunpoint, crying the whole time.

Before taking off in his stolen cab once again, officers said Todd opted for a new look.
"We have him on video leaving the hotel with a shaved head," said Blackburn.

At 9 a.m., police said Todd crashed the stolen cab into a parking garage.

At 11:30 a.m., he hailed a new one and headed to Opryland, then held the cab driver at knifepoint.

Police finally caught up with Todd at noon. They said he was hiding on top of Opryland, submerged in a water-cooling vat with water up to his nose.
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Old 04-10-2012, 03:41 PM   #696
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Conn. boy, 5, brings heroin for show and tell - Yahoo! News
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It's hard to throw a good shot with a drunk blonde wrapped around me.
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I don't think I'd stop even if I found a dick.
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Old 04-10-2012, 03:46 PM   #697
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Strangest thing about that story is what a 5 year old was doing wearing his dad's jacket to school?
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Old 04-10-2012, 04:03 PM   #698
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Quote:
"He was able to find the Walmart on Nolensville."

Something tells me this wasn't as difficult as it may have seemed.
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Old 04-12-2012, 09:00 AM   #699
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Speaking of Walmart and criminals:

Janitor finds meth lab in Walmart bathroom
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Old 04-12-2012, 11:39 AM   #700
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Speaking of Walmart and criminals:

Janitor finds meth lab in Walmart bathroom

This is one of the reasons why I do not use public bathrooms...you never know how long it's been since it was last cleaned. Oh, they have their little handy dandy piece of paper on the door with check marks on it, but, that doesn't mean the bathroom was actually cleaned.
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