Parents Anonymous, FOFC Branch - Page 4

FrogMan · 11-19-2005, 07:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vexroid

Looks like I'll be posting in this thread in 8 months

what a subtle way to pass on the news, you sneaky young dog!

Congratulations!!! (hoping I'm reading the news right)

FM

vex · 11-19-2005, 08:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FrogMan

what a subtle way to pass on the news, you sneaky young dog!

Congratulations!!! (hoping I'm reading the news right)

FM

Thanks, we just found out Thursday night. Very happy, very nervous

PilotMan · 11-19-2005, 11:47 AM

Great news Vex! Thanks for sharing. It is going to change your life more than any single event in your life. Have fun!

PilotMan · 11-19-2005, 11:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bea-Arthurs Hip

My question to the group, have any of you had a colicky baby? Did they after growing out of it and develop temper problems? Will it ever end?

From a Dad-Husband who has shouldered financial problems, depressed wife, many immediate family crisis and of course my own day to day problems.

Help Me

I can tell you Bea that I have been there, and it was not fun at all. It was a very trying time for us. But I am happy to say that it does indeed end.

Zach our middle child had it horrible. He would cry for hours and hours, and I would be reduced to a trembling, crying mass that resembled a Jello Jiggler. He is one of the most well adjusted, kind hearted and socially outgoing 3 yr olds that I have ever seen. So don't worry about the long term effects of it. Just pray it ends.

We also went throught the PPD as well. My wife was miserable, and our situation was similar to yours. As soon as she started taking meds things improved, however it didn't really end until much later. It also seems to have made her more susceptible to depression in general, as we have to deal with her and seasonal affective disorder during the overcast winter months in Cincy.

I know the burden of shouldering the load, if you have seen any of my rescent posts here you will see what I am talking about and you are spot on. For us, as the years have moved on, I find that the challenges never diminish and that your sanity is brought into question. Just remember that if you don't take care of yourself your family may really struggle. Try and make sure that you are getting what you need too, so that you can continue to support your family. The early years are the hardest, and as your kids age, the pressure ever so slowly lifts.

Hang in there and PM me if you need to chat.

PM

JonInMiddleGA · 11-19-2005, 12:07 PM

Welcome to the club Vex

Bea-Arthurs Hip · 11-19-2005, 01:52 PM

Guys -All of you...You have no idea how much this has helped...I just came in from an afternoon of hell at the mall with the family. Ever since I got up I have had a feeling of being a failure. I felt like l have failed in rasing our children, failed in making my wife happy and failed in making myself a real father and husband..

But after coming in and taking a little dad time, I thought I will check and see if anyone has responded with anything. then I see the posts- Sachmo, WSUCougar, JonInMiddleGA, Pilot Man- alls I can say from one dad to anonther is thanks!!!..It is nice to talk to other men who love being dads-husbands and take this vocation serious.

Again all your advice (and painful stories) are great signs of hope for me.

I will continue to check and seek support and hopefully give some as well!

p.s little funny story - Last night I am carrying Clare up to bed last night after wrestling with her, of course I got her all wound up, and she says:
Clare - "dad yant to pway one more game".
hip - carrying clare, "time for bed sweety, we can play tomorrow"
Clare - "its weal yun and we can pway while you howd me"
hip - "ok, what is it"
Clare - "pee-pee game"
hip - "Clare-no!!!"
Clare - "hehehehe"

She proceeded to pee all over me, I of course hurry up and get her changed before mommy caught wind of this new game. I then explained to Clare that next time she plays this game we will have to make her start wearing diapers again. Clare told me she was sorry and she will never play that game again...Thank God

thanks again guy!

PilotMan · 11-20-2005, 10:12 AM

One more thing about colic.

A running vacuum cleaner. I have seen it work. Just turn it on.

Have you seen those beanbag aromatherapy relaxing bags that you can throw in the microwave and heat up? My wife has made some of those before. We used to heat one up and put it in bed just to warm the bed up, you can remove it or leave it.

There are more that we have tried, I'll ask my wife.

WSUCougar · 11-20-2005, 10:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PilotMan

One more thing about colic.

A running vacuum cleaner. I have seen it work. Just turn it on.

HA! We used the vacuum quite frequently. Also my wife's hair dryer.

PilotMan · 11-20-2005, 01:17 PM

Hello Bea, This is Pilot-Man's wife. I have some other suggestions for colic. Try Hyland's Teething Tablets, we can only get them at the health food store where we live now but they are all natural and you can give them once an hour. They help reduce the pain and make them sleep, a sleeping baby= happier mommy and daddy. The other thing that worked for us was simethicone drops and Mozart. I also used to carry the babies in a sling a lot when they were crying, i could have my hands free to make dinner or whatever at the same time. If your interested in the warming rice aromatherapy bags let PilotMan know. I'd be happy to make one for you.
I had PPd after both our second and third and It was really hard on our marriage, the main thing I remember is just feeling really helpless and alone. Try really hard to be patient because it takes a while to feel better, lots of hugs and reassurance that your not the only one this happens to helps too. Spending a little bit of time doing things just for her helps too I think. A manicure or massage or even a oppurtunity to go shopping by herself might perk things up. You have to take care of you before everybody else which feels impossible with small kids but is worth the effort, I swear it.
If Mrs. Bea would like a little Mommy-to-Mommy support PM can give you my email, sometimes talking to somebody who's been there helps. Sorry this is so long. Good Luck!

TonyR · 11-20-2005, 09:14 PM

Hi Bea,
Can't say I know what it is like to have a colicy baby. My wife (ibnsgirl) and I are barely starting our family and we are on our first (Lucy-4 months).
I know when we first brought Lucy home from the hospital, she would go into these fits because we either weren't giving her enough formula or it was getting her constipated/gassy. The hospital kind of screwed us over when they pressured my wife into giving Lucy formula. ibnsgirl wanted to breatfeed. So, by giving Lucy formula, it gave Lucy nipple-confusion.
There were some long nights when ibnsgirl was up, or when I was up trying to calm her down. It made things a bit hard for us since techincally we are still new to the married life. Married 11 months and with a newborn. Granted we've already come 4 months now, but we're still working on it.
Lucy's a doll and great fun to be around. She's a big hoot when I'm able to get her talking or laughing, but she is definately a momma's girl. She can have fun with me, but only for so long, then it is like I want mom, I want mom now. It's a little frustrating since I also want to be able to settle her down, but sometimes it's best to leave it to the wife.
I know it is a learning process, and I have a long way to go. I can say that this group has helped a lot and is also giving me things to expect when as Lucy gets older.

Ksyrup · 11-21-2005, 11:57 AM

Colic sucked. Our second daughter Mackenzie had it. Nothing worked. Even things like the car, the dryer, the vaccuum cleaner, etc., worked to quiet her down, but she never stayed asleep. The minute we tried to put her to sleep - bam, she was screaming again. In order for it to work, I would have had to sit in the laundry room for hours on end. Not going to happen.

She had it for about 3 months. She screamed from 8pm until 1am nearly every night. And then one night we realized we didn't have to get up to get her, and we've had no problems with her at all. In fact, she's so good about going to bed now, I almost think those 3 months were worth the trade off. Since she was about 6 months, all we've had to do is take her into her room, turn off the lights, and she reaches for the bed. Putting her to sleep is a 10 second exercise. It's amazing.

Breeze · 11-21-2005, 12:00 PM

With the twins we had similar problems but it wasn't colic it was acid reflux. They ended up getting put on Baby Xantax and Regland (a medicine that helps breakdown baby food). Once we got that in their systems - no issues. Before that...my wife and I were Zombies from lack of sleep.

Ksyrup · 11-21-2005, 12:01 PM

We drove over to Jacksonville this past weekend to see the Wiggles. The kids loved it. Caitlin, our 6-year old, wanted to wear the shirt we bought her at the concert, and I told her to save it and she could wear it at school today, and she says, "But the Wiggles are for babies!" And then they came out and she was dancing like a fool.

BTW, if any of you are going to see them soon, Greg wasn't there. He apparently had to leave the tour for double hernia surgery. They had a replacement who was very good - sounded just like Greg. It couldn't have been easy replacing the guy who sings lead on all the songs, but they pulled it off very well. We had great seats, too - 11th row on the floor. Not quite Judas Priest, but it was great for the kids.

PilotMan · 11-21-2005, 10:17 PM

Good luck to you with the Wiggles. That just happens to be where I draw the line. Even Barney is ok, but the Wiggles? Not in this lifetime. Glad to hear that your kids had fun though.

JonInMiddleGA · 11-21-2005, 10:21 PM

Yikes! The Wiggles Live ... thankfully, Will's interest in them was shortlived & faded before before they became a touring act.

Ksyrup · 11-22-2005, 08:42 AM

I don't mind the Wiggles at all. Especially live, they put on a good show for the kids, but also throw a few things in for the parents. Yesterday Murray started playing Stairway to Heaven to tune his guitar. The first time we saw them, about 3 years ago, they did a segment where Captain Feathersword had to make up lyrics to go along with whatever songs the crowd yelled out, and they ended up playing and singing made up lyrics to Iron Man and Slim Shady, which was hilarious, actually.

Barney is ridiculous, though.

Bea-Arthurs Hip · 11-22-2005, 10:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TonyR

Hi Bea,
Can't say I know what it is like to have a colicy baby. My wife (ibnsgirl) and I are barely starting our family and we are on our first (Lucy-4 months).
I know when we first brought Lucy home from the hospital, she would go into these fits because we either weren't giving her enough formula or it was getting her constipated/gassy. The hospital kind of screwed us over when they pressured my wife into giving Lucy formula. ibnsgirl wanted to breatfeed. So, by giving Lucy formula, it gave Lucy nipple-confusion.
There were some long nights when ibnsgirl was up, or when I was up trying to calm her down. It made things a bit hard for us since techincally we are still new to the married life. Married 11 months and with a newborn. Granted we've already come 4 months now, but we're still working on it.
Lucy's a doll and great fun to be around. She's a big hoot when I'm able to get her talking or laughing, but she is definately a momma's girl. She can have fun with me, but only for so long, then it is like I want mom, I want mom now. It's a little frustrating since I also want to be able to settle her down, but sometimes it's best to leave it to the wife.
I know it is a learning process, and I have a long way to go. I can say that this group has helped a lot and is also giving me things to expect when as Lucy gets older.

Thanks TonyR, I know the feeling about mommas girls. Our first daughter was attatched to her mom something fierce. But now three years later she is a daddys girl

. Give it time.

Quote:

Hello Bea, This is Pilot-Man's wife. I have some other suggestions for colic. Try Hyland's Teething Tablets, we can only get them at the health food store where we live now but they are all natural and you can give them once an hour. They help reduce the pain and make them sleep, a sleeping baby= happier mommy and daddy. The other thing that worked for us was simethicone drops and Mozart. I also used to carry the babies in a sling a lot when they were crying, i could have my hands free to make dinner or whatever at the same time. If your interested in the warming rice aromatherapy bags let PilotMan know. I'd be happy to make one for you.

PM's Wife - I printed this off and gave it to my wife, hopefully she will take you up on the PM thing. She has lots of friends and family but none of them have little babies or have gone through PPD, so they are not much help as they think it is no big deal...Little do they know

...Thanks again

KevinNU7 · 11-29-2005, 03:12 PM

Just a little bump. The wife is closing in on the one month countdown and I'd hate to see this thread disappear when I will need it desperately

ibnsgirl · 12-02-2005, 01:31 PM

Hi y'all!

I hardly even logged in for almost 3 weeks, so I'm just getting caught up on everything.

Congrats, vex! This is so exciting!

A baby definitely changes everything, but the trip is worth it!

Bea -- As Tony said, Lucy was not colicky, but we have had our moments. Technically, Lucy is more of a "high-needs" baby in that she is very alert and active (read: draining at times), and knows what she wants but gets frustrated and can fall apart somewhat easily. As Tony also said, she is a riot, loves people (ok, just us but that will work itself out later), and learns very quickly.
Back to the point -- I have a question: am I to assum that your daughter isn’t suffering with colic still, but that you are anxious about her behavior? Just want to make sure that I am reading it correctly.

Kevin -- the last month was not all that easy, though I still think 24 hour sickness was worse. I know the holidays are upon us, and that is going to add stress/pressure to get everything done pre-baby. If we can help in any way, let us know.

Our 5 day trip to see the family went pretty darn well. I guess that the worst part was that Lucy's sleep schedule at night has been a bit out of whack since then.
Basically only Tony or I held her, so that dramatically reduced her crying. She really didn't have any meltdowns due to overtiredness either.
My relationship with the in-laws has suffered of late, but at least I don't think that this trip added anything to that. So all in all, a successful trip!!

Breeze · 12-02-2005, 01:47 PM

I have a quick update on my oldest son. Last year about this time we were having difficulty with him in school so the county came in to test him. The tests indicated he might have Asperger's. We didn't agree with that assessment because he is much to personable at home, but we did admit that he had problems relating to his peers and that he didn't do well in big groups. We've since investigated sensory intergration issues, and there are definately some present, but they aren't the underlying cause of his problems.

Fast forward to the present. Brett (5 years old) is doing much better with his social skills, in fact most of him current problems revolve around keeping his hands to himself and stopping to listen to his teacher. We ran through a bad couple of weeks in early November so my wife and I (with the request of the teacher decided to get him tested). we contacted out pediatrician and he said we needed to see a Psychologist to get some testing and assessment done before we can proceed.

We received the test results yesterday and here is what we've learned:

1 - he is ADHD (which my wife and I knew all along) and that isn't surprising because I was diagnosed as ADHD and Cathy had ADHD traits as a child but was never diagnosed. Moreover, the doctor said he was even more hyper than most ADHD kids she deals with.

2 - he has some OCD issues around perfectionism (none of the OCD disorders like Jack Nicholson displayed in "As Good As It Gets" - nothing to that extent). His issues deal with wanted to do something perfectly or not at all and if he elects to do it - he doesn't want to stop until he is finished.

3 - his fine motor skills are lacking so it takes him longer to complete his work and his writing is little sloppy.

4- and this is the most important aspect and directly affects the 1st item listed above. He is extremely smart. He was given an age equivalency test (the results of which are transformed into an IQ). As a 5 year 3 month old child he registered as an 8 year 10 month old - which correlates to an IQ of 159 putting him over the 99.9 percentile. This creates major problems in ADHD because he becomes bored quickly with easy tasks (coloring etc.) and he has a hard time making friends because they don't understand him when he plays more complex games or he finds their pretending childish.

We aren't sure how we are going to handle this - but they have recommended medication to calm the ADHD down thus allowing him to control his boredom better. Plus we will be placing him in the gifted program ASAP.

I'll keep you guys posted. Thanks for listening.

FrogMan · 12-02-2005, 01:51 PM

well Breeze, these are good news, you at least know a bit more what you are dealing with here. That's some impressive stuff that they can tell this much about a kiddo's behaviour... Good luck with him!

FM

sachmo71 · 12-02-2005, 04:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Breeze

I have a quick update on my oldest son. Last year about this time we were having difficulty with him in school so the county came in to test him. The tests indicated he might have Asperger's. We didn't agree with that assessment because he is much to personable at home, but we did admit that he had problems relating to his peers and that he didn't do well in big groups. We've since investigated sensory intergration issues, and there are definately some present, but they aren't the underlying cause of his problems.

Fast forward to the present. Brett (5 years old) is doing much better with his social skills, in fact most of him current problems revolve around keeping his hands to himself and stopping to listen to his teacher. We ran through a bad couple of weeks in early November so my wife and I (with the request of the teacher decided to get him tested). we contacted out pediatrician and he said we needed to see a Psychologist to get some testing and assessment done before we can proceed.

We received the test results yesterday and here is what we've learned:

1 - he is ADHD (which my wife and I knew all along) and that isn't surprising because I was diagnosed as ADHD and Cathy had ADHD traits as a child but was never diagnosed. Moreover, the doctor said he was even more hyper than most ADHD kids she deals with.

2 - he has some OCD issues around perfectionism (none of the OCD disorders like Jack Nicholson displayed in "As Good As It Gets" - nothing to that extent). His issues deal with wanted to do something perfectly or not at all and if he elects to do it - he doesn't want to stop until he is finished.

3 - his fine motor skills are lacking so it takes him longer to complete his work and his writing is little sloppy.

4- and this is the most important aspect and directly affects the 1st item listed above. He is extremely smart. He was given an age equivalency test (the results of which are transformed into an IQ). As a 5 year 3 month old child he registered as an 8 year 10 month old - which correlates to an IQ of 159 putting him over the 99.9 percentile. This creates major problems in ADHD because he becomes bored quickly with easy tasks (coloring etc.) and he has a hard time making friends because they don't understand him when he plays more complex games or he finds their pretending childish.

We aren't sure how we are going to handle this - but they have recommended medication to calm the ADHD down thus allowing him to control his boredom better. Plus we will be placing him in the gifted program ASAP.

I'll keep you guys posted. Thanks for listening.

sounds a lot like my daughter.

Breeze · 12-03-2005, 12:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sachmo71

sounds a lot like my daughter.

Hey Satch,

We are meeting with Brett's teachers in a couple weeks to try and come up with a plan that will meet his needs in all areas. Basically, finding him contemporaries Mentaly, Physically, and Emotionally, and that won't be easy because his levels are so diverse. We are leaning towards a mentor from a higher grade, and the gifted program, but that won't solve everything. Since you mentioned that Brett sounds like your daughter, do you have any suggestions?

sachmo71 · 12-03-2005, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Breeze

Hey Satch,

We are meeting with Brett's teachers in a couple weeks to try and come up with a plan that will meet his needs in all areas. Basically, finding him contemporaries Mentaly, Physically, and Emotionally, and that won't be easy because his levels are so diverse. We are leaning towards a mentor from a higher grade, and the gifted program, but that won't solve everything. Since you mentioned that Brett sounds like your daughter, do you have any suggestions?

Actually, my daughter is younger than your son, so we are still working with her. Her councelor didn't diagnose her as ADD, but she does exhibit some of the signs. She is always moving from one task to another, and get's bored easily. Basically, some of the things that have helped were to remove the majority of her toys from the play area to keep her concentrated on one toy at a time, try to talk more softly and on her level when winding down for the evening, and positive reinforcement as often as possible while keeping negative attention to a minimum. My wife and I were trying a very hands on approach with her, but we are finding that establishing boundaries and letting her guide herself seems to work much better.

Radii · 12-07-2005, 11:08 AM

Quick "kids say the darndest things" update to keep this great thread on the front page.

At dinner the other night, Anthony(8 year old son) was taking his plate to the kitchen. I reminded him to put it in the sink and rinse it off. Oliegirl says "no the sink is full, just put it on the counter."

Anthony says "I'll do what mommy says since she's the boss." HMMMMM. I forget if the next comment came on his own or after we asked, but he then said "Richard is the assistant boss."

Oh well, its not like it isn't true

FrogMan · 12-07-2005, 11:11 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Radii

Quick "kids say the darndest things" update to keep this great thread on the front page.

At dinner the other night, Anthony(8 year old son) was taking his plate to the kitchen. I reminded him to put it in the sink and rinse it off. Oliegirl says "no the sink is full, just put it on the counter."

Anthony says "I'll do what mommy says since she's the boss." HMMMMM. I forget if the next comment came on his own or after we asked, but he then said "Richard is the assistant boss."

Oh well, its not like it isn't true

yeah, for once he's not lying and he's telling at least part of the truth

FM

ibnsgirl · 12-07-2005, 05:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Breeze

I have a quick update on my oldest son. Last year about this time we were having difficulty with him in school so the county came in to test him. The tests indicated he might have Asperger's. We didn't agree with that assessment because he is much to personable at home, but we did admit that he had problems relating to his peers and that he didn't do well in big groups. We've since investigated sensory intergration issues, and there are definately some present, but they aren't the underlying cause of his problems.

Fast forward to the present. Brett (5 years old) is doing much better with his social skills, in fact most of him current problems revolve around keeping his hands to himself and stopping to listen to his teacher. We ran through a bad couple of weeks in early November so my wife and I (with the request of the teacher decided to get him tested). we contacted out pediatrician and he said we needed to see a Psychologist to get some testing and assessment done before we can proceed.

We received the test results yesterday and here is what we've learned:

1 - he is ADHD (which my wife and I knew all along) and that isn't surprising because I was diagnosed as ADHD and Cathy had ADHD traits as a child but was never diagnosed. Moreover, the doctor said he was even more hyper than most ADHD kids she deals with.

2 - he has some OCD issues around perfectionism (none of the OCD disorders like Jack Nicholson displayed in "As Good As It Gets" - nothing to that extent). His issues deal with wanted to do something perfectly or not at all and if he elects to do it - he doesn't want to stop until he is finished.

3 - his fine motor skills are lacking so it takes him longer to complete his work and his writing is little sloppy.

4- and this is the most important aspect and directly affects the 1st item listed above. He is extremely smart. He was given an age equivalency test (the results of which are transformed into an IQ). As a 5 year 3 month old child he registered as an 8 year 10 month old - which correlates to an IQ of 159 putting him over the 99.9 percentile. This creates major problems in ADHD because he becomes bored quickly with easy tasks (coloring etc.) and he has a hard time making friends because they don't understand him when he plays more complex games or he finds their pretending childish.

We aren't sure how we are going to handle this - but they have recommended medication to calm the ADHD down thus allowing him to control his boredom better. Plus we will be placing him in the gifted program ASAP.

I'll keep you guys posted. Thanks for listening.

Sounds like me... And I have the feeling that Lucy will battle with some of this, too.

Breeze · 12-09-2005, 06:52 AM

Well, we have our meeting with the teachers today to go over our plan for Brett. Through our research we have decided to ask for a few things:

1. A Mentor - because he doesn't seem to relate to the other kids in his class (though he will play with them, he often comes home saying "None of the kids in my class like the things I like") and because he does seem to relate well to older kids we are going to ask for a period of time a couple times a week where a child from an older grade can spend time reading with him or working on math, etc.

2. Horizons (gifted class) - we are going to request he get placed in Horizons. This one shouldn't be an issue because his teachers have already indicated that he probably shoud go there. The only problem is the Teacher is going to have to be aware of the ADHD issue and be willing to show patience in keeping him on task (though I will admit - it isn't as hard if he's interested in the subject matter).

3. Allow him to sit in with an older class for a period of time each day and work on what they are working on.

4. Make sure he still attends PE and recess with the other 5 year olds. As much as he relates on a mental level with older kids, he obviously isn't physically ready to play sports with them and we don't want him to lose self esteem because he's never able to play when he goes to the play ground.

5. A suggestion from another Gifted teacher that my mom works with (my mom is also a gifted teacher) was to have him sit in with a 3rd grade gifted class. That her 3rd graders would take Brett under there wing, have a blast teaching him things and almost treat him like a mascot. This will subject Brett to more difficult subject matter, while also giving him a lot of attention, which is good for the self esteem. I don't hold out much hope for this one though.

I'll let you know what comes out of this.

One other good note. The psycholgist sent some forms home and to school for us and his teachers to fill out. When these forms were filled out last year (by the counties request - no psycologist involved) there was a strong indication from his teachers that he might be an Asperger's child. Her testing didn't show those tendancies, but she wasn't going to rule it out with out taking additional steps. The first of the steps were these forms. The results of which strongly indicate he isn't suffering from Asperger's - so she's now going to remove any references to the disorder in the formal document.

Breeze · 12-13-2005, 10:09 AM

We had out meeting Friday and several things were accomplished. Here is what we are going to be doing with Brett for the rest of the school year.

1. He will attend a social skills class. This will help him deal with social settings better and they will work on his dealing with frustrations that build up from being unable to communicate affectively with class mates.

2. He will serve as a peer teacher, helping other students learn some of the things he already knows.

3. He will have a mentor from an older grade who will work with him on special assignments - giving him a mental peer to relate too and giving him more difficult work that he'll be able to focus on better. He'll also present his findings to the class each week.

4. He will have an adult mentor as well. Hopefully the horizon's teacher - thus allowing him to have exposure to the horizon's environment but not having to test for it (this eliminating the possibility that he gets distracted during the test and scores poorly. If he were to test for horizons and not pass, he would have to wait 2 years before testing again).

5. He will have new 1st grade skills introduced to him on a weekly basis and worksheets on those skills provided throughout the week. (currently worksheets have been given but not reviewed - only teaching of the first grade skills came from home - now he will actually be taught in the classroom the new work).

I'm sure there were some other consessions made, but I can't recall what they are. They will begin after the Christmas break. I'll keep you updated on how it works out. Who knows, maybe it will work well enough to work as a template for some of you who believe you may be facing the same issues.

As for medication? We'll be meeting with the Pediatrician to go over that option in early February.

WSUCougar · 12-13-2005, 03:26 PM

Good stuff, Breeze. Sounds like good news overall, yes?

My son (age 4) has his daycare's holiday singing thing tonight. Last year that meant crying scared in the hallway and then later standing on stage laughing at his friends attempting to sing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. What will this year bring?

He's also got another cough, likely a sinus infection, that keeps us awake most of the night. He is asthmatic, so it's always kind of torture for us.

Breeze · 12-13-2005, 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WSUCougar

Good stuff, Breeze. Sounds like good news overall, yes?

Yes, this is great news, and I don't think I could have walked away from the meeting any happier. I really have to take my hat off to the specialist with the county school system. They are really open to ideas and willing to try and help us. One of the specialist got a little offended at the findings of the doctor. I think her pride was a bit hurt, because the doctor was more specific and at times criticle of the initial testing - but that's understandable and she didn't let it affect her decisions.

Now I'm just praying that it will work as well as I anticipate it will.

FrogMan · 12-15-2005, 11:18 PM

Here's how a 8 and a half year old's mind work when it comes to making christmas gift lists. Andrew had received this wonderful Lego catalog by mail and he knows my mother in law cannot afford some crazy expensive gift, even though she would like to spend a month a half eating rice only in order to do so, so he decided not to pick the one big DynoAttack lego set at $60. What did he pick instead? "Oh look grandma, you could me this one at $30 and that other at $30 too, that's not too bad, huh?"

He still believes in Santa too even though my mother in law keeps reporting to him about what she wasn't able to find in stores and what not... Kinda funny, I guess he's made up his mind that there may be a Santa somewhere, but it's may not be him who's really bringing all the toys home

FM

WSUCougar · 12-16-2005, 09:39 AM

Funny stuff, FM.

As Christmas approaches, my son has taken to saying "I want that!" and "I want those!" everytime he sees anything remotely cool on a toy commercial. We have a stock response, "Let's see what Santa brings," but I struggle with the greed thing a little bit. I'm sure it's normal for a 4-year-old, but still. YOU CAN'T HAVE EVERYTHING!

Radii · 12-16-2005, 10:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WSUCougar

I struggle with the greed thing a little bit. I'm sure it's normal for a 4-year-old, but still. YOU CAN'T HAVE EVERYTHING!

When I first moved in with Oliegirl and had no idea what the hell I was doing as a parent I watched her handle this kind of thing. The "I wants" on TV commercials were fine, but there were a few incedents where he had just gotten all his birthday presents and then would throw a fit or pout at the store when Oliegirl wouldn't buy him some $2 toy at Target that he *had* to have. That was a good time for the greed conversation

The last day of school is today for Anthony, I haven't heard him sound real excited about Christmas itself yet, though I know he's excited for the 2+ weeks off and all the cool things he gets to do with his mom while dad slaves away at work

ibnsgirl · 12-16-2005, 01:52 PM

FM, that is too funny!

I hear ya, Cougar. It is really sad how commercial this season can get.

Of course, I'm not really sure how to handle the whole greed thing, since I'm a bad one to talk. I mean, I must be making up for living under a tight budget due to my chicken feed paychecks during my time in the workforce. When I say "wow, x would be nice to have," Tony says (more often than not), "if you want it, get it." Costco loves it when we go shopping!

Anyway, I guess we will cross that bridge (Christmas gifts for Lucy), when we get there. Right now, I think she would probably be most thrilled to get to play in the wrapping paper.

MacroGuru · 12-20-2005, 12:18 AM

Alright, I have been reading but not participating as my advice isn't geared toward some of the areas.

What I need is some advice here....I want to avoid the have your kid checked out aspect, don't get me wrong, I just don't think he needs it.......yet.

Anyways, we have the new baby (4 months) and my son (5 years) is now the middle child. He has been replaced as what you would call the "baby" of the family. So he was used to getting spoiled majorly just to a little....Now I don't think this should have messed him up that much, but I am now dealing with...what I would call, him marking his territory.

The kid is peeing on everything....I kid you not, last night he peed under his bed...last week, it was on his floor, the other day all over the bathroom...

I am at wits end, I don't know what to do, other than last night, I had him clean his own mess up, and he wasn't to happy with it....

WSUCougar · 12-20-2005, 08:26 AM

My opinion is that he's simply looking for attention. Perhaps going out of your way to include him in things related to the baby would help?

MacroGuru · 12-20-2005, 10:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WSUCougar

My opinion is that he's simply looking for attention. Perhaps going out of your way to include him in things related to the baby would help?

We already do this, I might step it up a bit.

Another thing I am starting to do is what I would call a date night for each kid. I take that specific kid out and either go bowling, miniature golf, movie, to the library, something that the specific kid wants to do, hoping that this will help with a lot of the issues we are experiencing.

TonyR · 12-20-2005, 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by indoorsoccersim

We already do this, I might step it up a bit.

Another thing I am starting to do is what I would call a date night for each kid. I take that specific kid out and either go bowling, miniature golf, movie, to the library, something that the specific kid wants to do, hoping that this will help with a lot of the issues we are experiencing.

That sounds like a very good idea. Granted ibnsgirl and I are only on our first, I think we both invision more. Let me know how this works out D.

ibnsgirl · 12-20-2005, 01:25 PM

^^ What Tony said. This is just a gut feeling (since I can't say that I have the experience to back it up), but I would definitely keep up the "help clean it up" part. I know it is faster to do it yourself, but the idea that this is not the best kind of quality time will probably get through faster.

Makes you wonder where some of this comes from.

PilotMan · 12-21-2005, 12:45 AM

Hey Dennis, this is just one of those things that you have to have patience with. Make him clean it up, and he should come out of it. Likely it is a transitory phase. I think the kids date night is a great idea.

My oldest went though a bed wetting phase whenever there was a big change in his life. Moving to a new place, siblings, it was just his response.

Hang in there.

PilotMan · 01-07-2006, 03:41 PM

We just moved my two Zach and Ean in a room together. It is not going to well. It's like a sleepover everynight and afternoon. I hope I can get back home before my wife packs her bags and leaves the kids.

On the job front.

We are voting on a proposal that takes away our retirement plan, and 401k funding. Takes away on average 17% of our pay. In the meantime we have already lost almost 15% of our fleet, and furloughed around 150 guys. To top that off, rumor has it, if we vote down this proposal (and there is a real possibility that could happen) the company will be liquidated. Not so fun. I am trying to keep it all in perspective.

MacroGuru · 01-07-2006, 04:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by indoorsoccersim

We already do this, I might step it up a bit.

Another thing I am starting to do is what I would call a date night for each kid. I take that specific kid out and either go bowling, miniature golf, movie, to the library, something that the specific kid wants to do, hoping that this will help with a lot of the issues we are experiencing.

Update,

He has stopped since I last wrote this....it was like the clean up helped...

I have been doing more with the kids and focusing on them more.

I have also accepted a new job, this will be a major re-adjustment for the family as I will be out on the road in big blocks, but less travel.

I have these major periods of no travel, which will keep me home and allow me to help out.

My wife is worried about being a single parent for 5 weeks at a time with the 3 kids, I might have her create an account to talk here, it might help her sanity.

MacroGuru · 01-07-2006, 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PilotMan

We just moved my two Zach and Ean in a room together. It is not going to well. It's like a sleepover everynight and afternoon. I hope I can get back home before my wife packs her bags and leaves the kids.

On the job front.

We are voting on a proposal that takes away our retirement plan, and 401k funding. Takes away on average 17% of our pay. In the meantime we have already lost almost 15% of our fleet, and furloughed around 150 guys. To top that off, rumor has it, if we vote down this proposal (and there is a real possibility that could happen) the company will be liquidated. Not so fun. I am trying to keep it all in perspective.

Well, we just seperated our two, so I know how you feel with the sleepover thing.....I feel for you there. Best thing to do is sit the rules, and remove anything that will keep them awake from the room.

As for the job front, all I can say is ouch....but I will definately include you in our prayers.

Radii · 01-07-2006, 05:25 PM

Good luck to both of you(indoorsoccersim and pilotman) on the job related stuff, espicially where it has such an impact on your families. When I was single, I had a job that had me travelling a few times a month, sometimes on literally no notice at all(go in monday morning, and be asked if I can fly to boston in 3 hours, etc). I had a blast doing it then but with a family it would be pretty tough at times i imagine.

TonyR · 01-07-2006, 09:53 PM

Dennis, Congrats on the new job and good luck with handling the traveling.
PM, I can't imagine what you or your family is going through. You'll remain in my thoughts and prayers.

As far as my job prospects, I'm still waiting to hear if I get the promotion I've been trying to get. The big thing about the promotion would be moving to somewhere I think would be a better place to raise my family. In anycase, I guess in this case, no news is neither good nor bad.

oliegirl · 01-07-2006, 10:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by indoorsoccersim

Update,

He has stopped since I last wrote this....it was like the clean up helped...

I have been doing more with the kids and focusing on them more.

I have also accepted a new job, this will be a major re-adjustment for the family as I will be out on the road in big blocks, but less travel.

I have these major periods of no travel, which will keep me home and allow me to help out.

My wife is worried about being a single parent for 5 weeks at a time with the 3 kids, I might have her create an account to talk here, it might help her sanity.

I can totally relate to her being worried about taking care of the kids while you are gone. I was a single mom to Anthony for 6 years. If she doesn't want to post here (or even if she does), and wants someone to talk to one on one, PM me and I'll give you my email addy, she can email me anytime!

Lorena · 01-08-2006, 02:11 AM

I just discovered this thread... great idea WSU!

Antmeister and I have 2 beautiful children, Larissa is 5, and Landon is 21 months old (typical mom counting in months).

I'm too tired to think of any stories right now, but I'll say that Larissa is always thirsty for knowledge asking many, many questions. She seems to come to me most of the time and when I don't know how to answer one, I send her to Antmeister. He always comes up with a witty response.

At first, I was a bit worried that our son hadn't spoken any words. A lot of "words" that come out of his mouth are mostly jibberish, so I thought something was wrong with him. The other day I grabbed a diaper and said, "Landon, come here I need to change your diaper" and he came to me, lied down and put his chubby little legs up, ready to be changed. I was so happy because I knew he understood but I guess he just doesn't wish to speak yet.

Ahh... the joys of parenthood. I'll have to ask Antmeister to post what Larissa did to our fish tank... I would never do the story justice.

ibnsgirl · 01-08-2006, 12:46 PM

Ouch, PM! That's rough. You and your family are in our prayers.

Congratz, Dennis, on the job front! I can totally understand your wife's worries about being a part-time single parent. I don't know how parents in that situation all of the time do it. I'm even somewhat apprehensive about a little little two-week trip Tony has to take.

As for life with Lucy:
She has started to add "da-da" and "ma-ma" to her string of babble! Very cute! Interestingly, when she is happy and in a good mood, her babble is full of da-das, whereas when she is unhappy/tired/hungry/othwise needs something, then all she says is ma-moms. Who knew?

On a different note, Tony is going to have his hands full next week. Next Monday, I go in for thyroid surgery, which will require a 23 hour stay in the hospital afterward. To say the least, no one is looking forward to it.

As background, the right side of my thyroid inexplicably started retaining fluid when I was about 4 months pregnant. Of course, the doctors didn't want to mess with it then, but not removing it meant that it has had to be drained several (painful) times. Even though the fluid build-up slowed dramatically after Lucy was born, leaving it alone really isn't an option, as it effects my ability to swallow. Assuming all goes well and the pathology report comes back clean, then all I should expect is a sore neck and a raspy voice for a few days.

So anyway, we finally are on track to deal with that. I'm not exactly sure when they will allow visitors, but in any case, it will mark the longest time Lucy and I will be away from each other. For Tony it means that he will have full-time baby duty. As long as everyone can refrain from getting her too wound-up, it shouldn't be horribly bad. Still, we are all looking forward to its being over.

WSUCougar · 01-23-2006, 05:23 PM

Thread seems to be dying off, so I thought I'd bump it with an update of my own.

Couple things...

1. I was out of town for a week and Drew had his first major case of Daddyitis. Lots of asking "Where's Daddy?" Nightmares on three consecutive nights during my absence (he hasn't had that many of those for months). Progressively more anxious the longer I was away. And a huge grin and hug when I came home. This was all a mixed thing for me to experience (good, in a way, but tough on my wife). He has been entirely a Mommy's boy up until now.

2. Drew had his first trip to the dentist on Saturday. It's a kid dentist place, which is great to begin with. But he did really good with the whole things, which is very encouraging. On the down side, he already has a cavity (ACK!) and will need a filling. He also has some staining on one of his front teeth, likely due to his asthma medication (inhaler). We'll see how that goes.

How's everyone else doing?

11-19-2005, 11:47 AM	#153
PilotMan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Seven miles up	Great news Vex! Thanks for sharing. It is going to change your life more than any single event in your life. Have fun! __________________ He's just like if Snow White was competitive, horny, and capable of beating the shit out of anyone that called her Pops. Like Steam? Join the FOFC Steam group here: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/FOFConSteam

11-19-2005, 12:07 PM	#155
JonInMiddleGA Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Behind Enemy Lines in Athens, GA	Welcome to the club Vex __________________ "I lit another cigarette. Unless I specifically inform you to the contrary, I am always lighting another cigarette." - from a novel by Martin Amis

11-19-2005, 01:52 PM	#156
Bea-Arthurs Hip H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: The D	Guys -All of you...You have no idea how much this has helped...I just came in from an afternoon of hell at the mall with the family. Ever since I got up I have had a feeling of being a failure. I felt like l have failed in rasing our children, failed in making my wife happy and failed in making myself a real father and husband.. But after coming in and taking a little dad time, I thought I will check and see if anyone has responded with anything. then I see the posts- Sachmo, WSUCougar, JonInMiddleGA, Pilot Man- alls I can say from one dad to anonther is thanks!!!..It is nice to talk to other men who love being dads-husbands and take this vocation serious. Again all your advice (and painful stories) are great signs of hope for me. I will continue to check and seek support and hopefully give some as well! p.s little funny story - Last night I am carrying Clare up to bed last night after wrestling with her, of course I got her all wound up, and she says: Clare - "dad yant to pway one more game". hip - carrying clare, "time for bed sweety, we can play tomorrow" Clare - "its weal yun and we can pway while you howd me" hip - "ok, what is it" Clare - "pee-pee game" hip - "Clare-no!!!" Clare - "hehehehe" She proceeded to pee all over me, I of course hurry up and get her changed before mommy caught wind of this new game. I then explained to Clare that next time she plays this game we will have to make her start wearing diapers again. Clare told me she was sorry and she will never play that game again...Thank God thanks again guy! Last edited by Bea-Arthurs Hip : 11-19-2005 at 01:54 PM.

11-20-2005, 10:12 AM	#157
PilotMan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Seven miles up	One more thing about colic. A running vacuum cleaner. I have seen it work. Just turn it on. Have you seen those beanbag aromatherapy relaxing bags that you can throw in the microwave and heat up? My wife has made some of those before. We used to heat one up and put it in bed just to warm the bed up, you can remove it or leave it. There are more that we have tried, I'll ask my wife. __________________ He's just like if Snow White was competitive, horny, and capable of beating the shit out of anyone that called her Pops. Like Steam? Join the FOFC Steam group here: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/FOFConSteam

11-20-2005, 01:17 PM	#159
PilotMan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Seven miles up	Hello Bea, This is Pilot-Man's wife. I have some other suggestions for colic. Try Hyland's Teething Tablets, we can only get them at the health food store where we live now but they are all natural and you can give them once an hour. They help reduce the pain and make them sleep, a sleeping baby= happier mommy and daddy. The other thing that worked for us was simethicone drops and Mozart. I also used to carry the babies in a sling a lot when they were crying, i could have my hands free to make dinner or whatever at the same time. If your interested in the warming rice aromatherapy bags let PilotMan know. I'd be happy to make one for you. I had PPd after both our second and third and It was really hard on our marriage, the main thing I remember is just feeling really helpless and alone. Try really hard to be patient because it takes a while to feel better, lots of hugs and reassurance that your not the only one this happens to helps too. Spending a little bit of time doing things just for her helps too I think. A manicure or massage or even a oppurtunity to go shopping by herself might perk things up. You have to take care of you before everybody else which feels impossible with small kids but is worth the effort, I swear it. If Mrs. Bea would like a little Mommy-to-Mommy support PM can give you my email, sometimes talking to somebody who's been there helps. Sorry this is so long. Good Luck! __________________ He's just like if Snow White was competitive, horny, and capable of beating the shit out of anyone that called her Pops. Like Steam? Join the FOFC Steam group here: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/FOFConSteam

11-20-2005, 09:14 PM	#160
TonyR High School Varsity Join Date: May 2003 Location: Texas	Hi Bea, Can't say I know what it is like to have a colicy baby. My wife (ibnsgirl) and I are barely starting our family and we are on our first (Lucy-4 months). I know when we first brought Lucy home from the hospital, she would go into these fits because we either weren't giving her enough formula or it was getting her constipated/gassy. The hospital kind of screwed us over when they pressured my wife into giving Lucy formula. ibnsgirl wanted to breatfeed. So, by giving Lucy formula, it gave Lucy nipple-confusion. There were some long nights when ibnsgirl was up, or when I was up trying to calm her down. It made things a bit hard for us since techincally we are still new to the married life. Married 11 months and with a newborn. Granted we've already come 4 months now, but we're still working on it. Lucy's a doll and great fun to be around. She's a big hoot when I'm able to get her talking or laughing, but she is definately a momma's girl. She can have fun with me, but only for so long, then it is like I want mom, I want mom now. It's a little frustrating since I also want to be able to settle her down, but sometimes it's best to leave it to the wife. I know it is a learning process, and I have a long way to go. I can say that this group has helped a lot and is also giving me things to expect when as Lucy gets older. __________________ XBox360 GamerTag - Tonyr76 Former HTer

11-21-2005, 11:57 AM	#161
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	Colic sucked. Our second daughter Mackenzie had it. Nothing worked. Even things like the car, the dryer, the vaccuum cleaner, etc., worked to quiet her down, but she never stayed asleep. The minute we tried to put her to sleep - bam, she was screaming again. In order for it to work, I would have had to sit in the laundry room for hours on end. Not going to happen. She had it for about 3 months. She screamed from 8pm until 1am nearly every night. And then one night we realized we didn't have to get up to get her, and we've had no problems with her at all. In fact, she's so good about going to bed now, I almost think those 3 months were worth the trade off. Since she was about 6 months, all we've had to do is take her into her room, turn off the lights, and she reaches for the bed. Putting her to sleep is a 10 second exercise. It's amazing. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

11-21-2005, 12:00 PM	#162
Breeze Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Northern Suburbs of ATL	With the twins we had similar problems but it wasn't colic it was acid reflux. They ended up getting put on Baby Xantax and Regland (a medicine that helps breakdown baby food). Once we got that in their systems - no issues. Before that...my wife and I were Zombies from lack of sleep.

11-21-2005, 12:01 PM	#163
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	We drove over to Jacksonville this past weekend to see the Wiggles. The kids loved it. Caitlin, our 6-year old, wanted to wear the shirt we bought her at the concert, and I told her to save it and she could wear it at school today, and she says, "But the Wiggles are for babies!" And then they came out and she was dancing like a fool. BTW, if any of you are going to see them soon, Greg wasn't there. He apparently had to leave the tour for double hernia surgery. They had a replacement who was very good - sounded just like Greg. It couldn't have been easy replacing the guy who sings lead on all the songs, but they pulled it off very well. We had great seats, too - 11th row on the floor. Not quite Judas Priest, but it was great for the kids. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete." Last edited by Ksyrup : 11-21-2005 at 12:03 PM.

11-21-2005, 10:17 PM	#164
PilotMan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Seven miles up	Good luck to you with the Wiggles. That just happens to be where I draw the line. Even Barney is ok, but the Wiggles? Not in this lifetime. Glad to hear that your kids had fun though. __________________ He's just like if Snow White was competitive, horny, and capable of beating the shit out of anyone that called her Pops. Like Steam? Join the FOFC Steam group here: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/FOFConSteam

11-21-2005, 10:21 PM	#165
JonInMiddleGA Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Behind Enemy Lines in Athens, GA	Yikes! The Wiggles Live ... thankfully, Will's interest in them was shortlived & faded before before they became a touring act. __________________ "I lit another cigarette. Unless I specifically inform you to the contrary, I am always lighting another cigarette." - from a novel by Martin Amis

11-22-2005, 08:42 AM	#166
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	I don't mind the Wiggles at all. Especially live, they put on a good show for the kids, but also throw a few things in for the parents. Yesterday Murray started playing Stairway to Heaven to tune his guitar. The first time we saw them, about 3 years ago, they did a segment where Captain Feathersword had to make up lyrics to go along with whatever songs the crowd yelled out, and they ended up playing and singing made up lyrics to Iron Man and Slim Shady, which was hilarious, actually. Barney is ridiculous, though. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

11-29-2005, 03:12 PM	#168
KevinNU7 College Starter Join Date: May 2003 Location: Beantown	Just a little bump. The wife is closing in on the one month countdown and I'd hate to see this thread disappear when I will need it desperately __________________ Boston Bashers - III.14 - (8347)

12-02-2005, 01:31 PM	#169
ibnsgirl H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: South Texas	Hi y'all! I hardly even logged in for almost 3 weeks, so I'm just getting caught up on everything. Congrats, vex! This is so exciting! A baby definitely changes everything, but the trip is worth it! Bea -- As Tony said, Lucy was not colicky, but we have had our moments. Technically, Lucy is more of a "high-needs" baby in that she is very alert and active (read: draining at times), and knows what she wants but gets frustrated and can fall apart somewhat easily. As Tony also said, she is a riot, loves people (ok, just us but that will work itself out later), and learns very quickly. Back to the point -- I have a question: am I to assum that your daughter isn’t suffering with colic still, but that you are anxious about her behavior? Just want to make sure that I am reading it correctly. Kevin -- the last month was not all that easy, though I still think 24 hour sickness was worse. I know the holidays are upon us, and that is going to add stress/pressure to get everything done pre-baby. If we can help in any way, let us know. Our 5 day trip to see the family went pretty darn well. I guess that the worst part was that Lucy's sleep schedule at night has been a bit out of whack since then. Basically only Tony or I held her, so that dramatically reduced her crying. She really didn't have any meltdowns due to overtiredness either. My relationship with the in-laws has suffered of late, but at least I don't think that this trip added anything to that. So all in all, a successful trip!! __________________ Hattrick: The Smacky Packers 71158 Thanks to my supporters: TonyR (SA Griffins FC), sterlingice (Houston Hippopotami), TK (Real Terps FC), the notorious pirate AE (Puke Green Sox FC), Krondor (Krondor Lancers), Dark Affair (Orient Express), and tucker rocky (Jacksonville Kickers).

12-02-2005, 01:47 PM	#170
Breeze Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Northern Suburbs of ATL	I have a quick update on my oldest son. Last year about this time we were having difficulty with him in school so the county came in to test him. The tests indicated he might have Asperger's. We didn't agree with that assessment because he is much to personable at home, but we did admit that he had problems relating to his peers and that he didn't do well in big groups. We've since investigated sensory intergration issues, and there are definately some present, but they aren't the underlying cause of his problems. Fast forward to the present. Brett (5 years old) is doing much better with his social skills, in fact most of him current problems revolve around keeping his hands to himself and stopping to listen to his teacher. We ran through a bad couple of weeks in early November so my wife and I (with the request of the teacher decided to get him tested). we contacted out pediatrician and he said we needed to see a Psychologist to get some testing and assessment done before we can proceed. We received the test results yesterday and here is what we've learned: 1 - he is ADHD (which my wife and I knew all along) and that isn't surprising because I was diagnosed as ADHD and Cathy had ADHD traits as a child but was never diagnosed. Moreover, the doctor said he was even more hyper than most ADHD kids she deals with. 2 - he has some OCD issues around perfectionism (none of the OCD disorders like Jack Nicholson displayed in "As Good As It Gets" - nothing to that extent). His issues deal with wanted to do something perfectly or not at all and if he elects to do it - he doesn't want to stop until he is finished. 3 - his fine motor skills are lacking so it takes him longer to complete his work and his writing is little sloppy. 4- and this is the most important aspect and directly affects the 1st item listed above. He is extremely smart. He was given an age equivalency test (the results of which are transformed into an IQ). As a 5 year 3 month old child he registered as an 8 year 10 month old - which correlates to an IQ of 159 putting him over the 99.9 percentile. This creates major problems in ADHD because he becomes bored quickly with easy tasks (coloring etc.) and he has a hard time making friends because they don't understand him when he plays more complex games or he finds their pretending childish. We aren't sure how we are going to handle this - but they have recommended medication to calm the ADHD down thus allowing him to control his boredom better. Plus we will be placing him in the gifted program ASAP. I'll keep you guys posted. Thanks for listening. Last edited by Breeze : 12-02-2005 at 02:07 PM.

12-02-2005, 01:51 PM	#171
FrogMan Hattrick Moderator Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Pintendre, Qc, Canada	well Breeze, these are good news, you at least know a bit more what you are dealing with here. That's some impressive stuff that they can tell this much about a kiddo's behaviour... Good luck with him! FM __________________ A Black Belt is a White Belt who refused to give up... follow my story: The real life story of a running frog...

12-07-2005, 11:08 AM	#175
Radii Head Coach Join Date: Jul 2001	Quick "kids say the darndest things" update to keep this great thread on the front page. At dinner the other night, Anthony(8 year old son) was taking his plate to the kitchen. I reminded him to put it in the sink and rinse it off. Oliegirl says "no the sink is full, just put it on the counter." Anthony says "I'll do what mommy says since she's the boss." HMMMMM. I forget if the next comment came on his own or after we asked, but he then said "Richard is the assistant boss." Oh well, its not like it isn't true

12-09-2005, 06:52 AM	#178
Breeze Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Northern Suburbs of ATL	Well, we have our meeting with the teachers today to go over our plan for Brett. Through our research we have decided to ask for a few things: 1. A Mentor - because he doesn't seem to relate to the other kids in his class (though he will play with them, he often comes home saying "None of the kids in my class like the things I like") and because he does seem to relate well to older kids we are going to ask for a period of time a couple times a week where a child from an older grade can spend time reading with him or working on math, etc. 2. Horizons (gifted class) - we are going to request he get placed in Horizons. This one shouldn't be an issue because his teachers have already indicated that he probably shoud go there. The only problem is the Teacher is going to have to be aware of the ADHD issue and be willing to show patience in keeping him on task (though I will admit - it isn't as hard if he's interested in the subject matter). 3. Allow him to sit in with an older class for a period of time each day and work on what they are working on. 4. Make sure he still attends PE and recess with the other 5 year olds. As much as he relates on a mental level with older kids, he obviously isn't physically ready to play sports with them and we don't want him to lose self esteem because he's never able to play when he goes to the play ground. 5. A suggestion from another Gifted teacher that my mom works with (my mom is also a gifted teacher) was to have him sit in with a 3rd grade gifted class. That her 3rd graders would take Brett under there wing, have a blast teaching him things and almost treat him like a mascot. This will subject Brett to more difficult subject matter, while also giving him a lot of attention, which is good for the self esteem. I don't hold out much hope for this one though. I'll let you know what comes out of this. One other good note. The psycholgist sent some forms home and to school for us and his teachers to fill out. When these forms were filled out last year (by the counties request - no psycologist involved) there was a strong indication from his teachers that he might be an Asperger's child. Her testing didn't show those tendancies, but she wasn't going to rule it out with out taking additional steps. The first of the steps were these forms. The results of which strongly indicate he isn't suffering from Asperger's - so she's now going to remove any references to the disorder in the formal document.

12-13-2005, 10:09 AM	#179
Breeze Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Northern Suburbs of ATL	We had out meeting Friday and several things were accomplished. Here is what we are going to be doing with Brett for the rest of the school year. 1. He will attend a social skills class. This will help him deal with social settings better and they will work on his dealing with frustrations that build up from being unable to communicate affectively with class mates. 2. He will serve as a peer teacher, helping other students learn some of the things he already knows. 3. He will have a mentor from an older grade who will work with him on special assignments - giving him a mental peer to relate too and giving him more difficult work that he'll be able to focus on better. He'll also present his findings to the class each week. 4. He will have an adult mentor as well. Hopefully the horizon's teacher - thus allowing him to have exposure to the horizon's environment but not having to test for it (this eliminating the possibility that he gets distracted during the test and scores poorly. If he were to test for horizons and not pass, he would have to wait 2 years before testing again). 5. He will have new 1st grade skills introduced to him on a weekly basis and worksheets on those skills provided throughout the week. (currently worksheets have been given but not reviewed - only teaching of the first grade skills came from home - now he will actually be taught in the classroom the new work). I'm sure there were some other consessions made, but I can't recall what they are. They will begin after the Christmas break. I'll keep you updated on how it works out. Who knows, maybe it will work well enough to work as a template for some of you who believe you may be facing the same issues. As for medication? We'll be meeting with the Pediatrician to go over that option in early February.

12-13-2005, 03:26 PM	#180
WSUCougar Rider Of Rohan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Port Angeles, WA or Helm's Deep	Good stuff, Breeze. Sounds like good news overall, yes? My son (age 4) has his daycare's holiday singing thing tonight. Last year that meant crying scared in the hallway and then later standing on stage laughing at his friends attempting to sing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. What will this year bring? He's also got another cough, likely a sinus infection, that keeps us awake most of the night. He is asthmatic, so it's always kind of torture for us. __________________ It's not the years...it's the mileage.

12-15-2005, 11:18 PM	#182
FrogMan Hattrick Moderator Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Pintendre, Qc, Canada	Here's how a 8 and a half year old's mind work when it comes to making christmas gift lists. Andrew had received this wonderful Lego catalog by mail and he knows my mother in law cannot afford some crazy expensive gift, even though she would like to spend a month a half eating rice only in order to do so, so he decided not to pick the one big DynoAttack lego set at $60. What did he pick instead? "Oh look grandma, you could me this one at $30 and that other at $30 too, that's not too bad, huh?" He still believes in Santa too even though my mother in law keeps reporting to him about what she wasn't able to find in stores and what not... Kinda funny, I guess he's made up his mind that there may be a Santa somewhere, but it's may not be him who's really bringing all the toys home FM __________________ A Black Belt is a White Belt who refused to give up... follow my story: The real life story of a running frog...

12-16-2005, 09:39 AM	#183
WSUCougar Rider Of Rohan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Port Angeles, WA or Helm's Deep	Funny stuff, FM. As Christmas approaches, my son has taken to saying "I want that!" and "I want those!" everytime he sees anything remotely cool on a toy commercial. We have a stock response, "Let's see what Santa brings," but I struggle with the greed thing a little bit. I'm sure it's normal for a 4-year-old, but still. YOU CAN'T HAVE EVERYTHING! __________________ It's not the years...it's the mileage.

12-16-2005, 01:52 PM	#185
ibnsgirl H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: South Texas	FM, that is too funny! I hear ya, Cougar. It is really sad how commercial this season can get. Of course, I'm not really sure how to handle the whole greed thing, since I'm a bad one to talk. I mean, I must be making up for living under a tight budget due to my chicken feed paychecks during my time in the workforce. When I say "wow, x would be nice to have," Tony says (more often than not), "if you want it, get it." Costco loves it when we go shopping! Anyway, I guess we will cross that bridge (Christmas gifts for Lucy), when we get there. Right now, I think she would probably be most thrilled to get to play in the wrapping paper. __________________ Hattrick: The Smacky Packers 71158 Thanks to my supporters: TonyR (SA Griffins FC), sterlingice (Houston Hippopotami), TK (Real Terps FC), the notorious pirate AE (Puke Green Sox FC), Krondor (Krondor Lancers), Dark Affair (Orient Express), and tucker rocky (Jacksonville Kickers).

12-20-2005, 12:18 AM	#186
MacroGuru Coordinator Join Date: May 2003 Location: Utah	Alright, I have been reading but not participating as my advice isn't geared toward some of the areas. What I need is some advice here....I want to avoid the have your kid checked out aspect, don't get me wrong, I just don't think he needs it.......yet. Anyways, we have the new baby (4 months) and my son (5 years) is now the middle child. He has been replaced as what you would call the "baby" of the family. So he was used to getting spoiled majorly just to a little....Now I don't think this should have messed him up that much, but I am now dealing with...what I would call, him marking his territory. The kid is peeing on everything....I kid you not, last night he peed under his bed...last week, it was on his floor, the other day all over the bathroom... I am at wits end, I don't know what to do, other than last night, I had him clean his own mess up, and he wasn't to happy with it.... __________________ "forgetting what is in the past, I strive for the future"

12-20-2005, 08:26 AM	#187
WSUCougar Rider Of Rohan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Port Angeles, WA or Helm's Deep	My opinion is that he's simply looking for attention. Perhaps going out of your way to include him in things related to the baby would help? __________________ It's not the years...it's the mileage.

12-20-2005, 01:25 PM	#190
ibnsgirl H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: South Texas	^^ What Tony said. This is just a gut feeling (since I can't say that I have the experience to back it up), but I would definitely keep up the "help clean it up" part. I know it is faster to do it yourself, but the idea that this is not the best kind of quality time will probably get through faster. Makes you wonder where some of this comes from. __________________ Hattrick: The Smacky Packers 71158 Thanks to my supporters: TonyR (SA Griffins FC), sterlingice (Houston Hippopotami), TK (Real Terps FC), the notorious pirate AE (Puke Green Sox FC), Krondor (Krondor Lancers), Dark Affair (Orient Express), and tucker rocky (Jacksonville Kickers).

12-21-2005, 12:45 AM	#191
PilotMan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Seven miles up	Hey Dennis, this is just one of those things that you have to have patience with. Make him clean it up, and he should come out of it. Likely it is a transitory phase. I think the kids date night is a great idea. My oldest went though a bed wetting phase whenever there was a big change in his life. Moving to a new place, siblings, it was just his response. Hang in there. __________________ He's just like if Snow White was competitive, horny, and capable of beating the shit out of anyone that called her Pops. Like Steam? Join the FOFC Steam group here: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/FOFConSteam

01-07-2006, 03:41 PM	#192
PilotMan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Seven miles up	We just moved my two Zach and Ean in a room together. It is not going to well. It's like a sleepover everynight and afternoon. I hope I can get back home before my wife packs her bags and leaves the kids. On the job front. We are voting on a proposal that takes away our retirement plan, and 401k funding. Takes away on average 17% of our pay. In the meantime we have already lost almost 15% of our fleet, and furloughed around 150 guys. To top that off, rumor has it, if we vote down this proposal (and there is a real possibility that could happen) the company will be liquidated. Not so fun. I am trying to keep it all in perspective. __________________ He's just like if Snow White was competitive, horny, and capable of beating the shit out of anyone that called her Pops. Like Steam? Join the FOFC Steam group here: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/FOFConSteam

01-07-2006, 05:25 PM	#195
Radii Head Coach Join Date: Jul 2001	Good luck to both of you(indoorsoccersim and pilotman) on the job related stuff, espicially where it has such an impact on your families. When I was single, I had a job that had me travelling a few times a month, sometimes on literally no notice at all(go in monday morning, and be asked if I can fly to boston in 3 hours, etc). I had a blast doing it then but with a family it would be pretty tough at times i imagine.

01-07-2006, 09:53 PM	#196
TonyR High School Varsity Join Date: May 2003 Location: Texas	Dennis, Congrats on the new job and good luck with handling the traveling. PM, I can't imagine what you or your family is going through. You'll remain in my thoughts and prayers. As far as my job prospects, I'm still waiting to hear if I get the promotion I've been trying to get. The big thing about the promotion would be moving to somewhere I think would be a better place to raise my family. In anycase, I guess in this case, no news is neither good nor bad. __________________ XBox360 GamerTag - Tonyr76 Former HTer

01-08-2006, 02:11 AM	#198
Lorena Unregistered Join Date: May 2004	I just discovered this thread... great idea WSU! Antmeister and I have 2 beautiful children, Larissa is 5, and Landon is 21 months old (typical mom counting in months). I'm too tired to think of any stories right now, but I'll say that Larissa is always thirsty for knowledge asking many, many questions. She seems to come to me most of the time and when I don't know how to answer one, I send her to Antmeister. He always comes up with a witty response. At first, I was a bit worried that our son hadn't spoken any words. A lot of "words" that come out of his mouth are mostly jibberish, so I thought something was wrong with him. The other day I grabbed a diaper and said, "Landon, come here I need to change your diaper" and he came to me, lied down and put his chubby little legs up, ready to be changed. I was so happy because I knew he understood but I guess he just doesn't wish to speak yet. Ahh... the joys of parenthood. I'll have to ask Antmeister to post what Larissa did to our fish tank... I would never do the story justice.

01-08-2006, 12:46 PM	#199
ibnsgirl H.S. Freshman Team Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: South Texas	Ouch, PM! That's rough. You and your family are in our prayers. Congratz, Dennis, on the job front! I can totally understand your wife's worries about being a part-time single parent. I don't know how parents in that situation all of the time do it. I'm even somewhat apprehensive about a little little two-week trip Tony has to take. As for life with Lucy: She has started to add "da-da" and "ma-ma" to her string of babble! Very cute! Interestingly, when she is happy and in a good mood, her babble is full of da-das, whereas when she is unhappy/tired/hungry/othwise needs something, then all she says is ma-moms. Who knew? On a different note, Tony is going to have his hands full next week. Next Monday, I go in for thyroid surgery, which will require a 23 hour stay in the hospital afterward. To say the least, no one is looking forward to it. As background, the right side of my thyroid inexplicably started retaining fluid when I was about 4 months pregnant. Of course, the doctors didn't want to mess with it then, but not removing it meant that it has had to be drained several (painful) times. Even though the fluid build-up slowed dramatically after Lucy was born, leaving it alone really isn't an option, as it effects my ability to swallow. Assuming all goes well and the pathology report comes back clean, then all I should expect is a sore neck and a raspy voice for a few days. So anyway, we finally are on track to deal with that. I'm not exactly sure when they will allow visitors, but in any case, it will mark the longest time Lucy and I will be away from each other. For Tony it means that he will have full-time baby duty. As long as everyone can refrain from getting her too wound-up, it shouldn't be horribly bad. Still, we are all looking forward to its being over. __________________ Hattrick: The Smacky Packers 71158 Thanks to my supporters: TonyR (SA Griffins FC), sterlingice (Houston Hippopotami), TK (Real Terps FC), the notorious pirate AE (Puke Green Sox FC), Krondor (Krondor Lancers), Dark Affair (Orient Express), and tucker rocky (Jacksonville Kickers).

01-23-2006, 05:23 PM	#200
WSUCougar Rider Of Rohan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Port Angeles, WA or Helm's Deep	Thread seems to be dying off, so I thought I'd bump it with an update of my own. Couple things... 1. I was out of town for a week and Drew had his first major case of Daddyitis. Lots of asking "Where's Daddy?" Nightmares on three consecutive nights during my absence (he hasn't had that many of those for months). Progressively more anxious the longer I was away. And a huge grin and hug when I came home. This was all a mixed thing for me to experience (good, in a way, but tough on my wife). He has been entirely a Mommy's boy up until now. 2. Drew had his first trip to the dentist on Saturday. It's a kid dentist place, which is great to begin with. But he did really good with the whole things, which is very encouraging. On the down side, he already has a cavity (ACK!) and will need a filling. He also has some staining on one of his front teeth, likely due to his asthma medication (inhaler). We'll see how that goes. How's everyone else doing? __________________ It's not the years...it's the mileage.

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