Ping: Drunk Guy

[Karlifornia]

I am getting sloppy drunk tonight all by myself. As George Thoroughgood once said:

WHEN I DRINK A-LOOOONE
I PREFER TO BE BY MYSELF

[cartman]

THE FIVE STAGES OF DRUNKENNESS


Stage #1 -- Smart

This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject. You
know all and greatly wish to express this knowledge to anyone who
will listen. At this stage you are also always right. And of course
the person you are talking with is very wrong. You will talk for
hours trying to convince someone that you are right. This makes for an
interesting argument when both parties are "smart". Two people talking,
in fact, arguing about a subject neither one really knows anything
about, but are convinced that they are they complete authority on the
subject makes for great entertainment for those get the opportunity to
listen in.

Stage #2 -- Handsome/Pretty

This is when you are convinced that you are the best looking person in
the entire room and everyone is looking at you. You begin to wink at
perfect strangers and ask them to dance because of course they had been
admiring you the whole evening. You are the center of attention, and all
eyes are directed at you because you are the most beautiful thing on the
face of the earth. Now keep in mind that you are still smart, so you can
talk to this person who has been admiring you about any and all subjects
under the sun.

Stage #3 -- Rich

This is when you suddenly become the richest person in the world. You can
buy drinks for the entire bar and put it on your bill because you surely
have an armored truck full of your money parked behind the bar. You can
also make bets in this stage. Now of course you still know all, so you
will always win all your bets. And you have no concern for how much
money you bet because you have all the money in the world. You will also
begin to buy drinks for all the people in the bar who are admiring you
because you are now the smartest, prettiest, and richest person on the
face of the earth.

Stage #4 -- Bulletproof

You can now pick fights with the people you have been betting money with
because you cannot be hurt by anything. At this point you would go up to
the boyfriend of the woman who had been admiring your beautiful self
all evening and challenge him to a battle of wits for money. You have no
worry about loosing this battle of wits because you know all, have all
the money to cover this bet, and you obviously win a fight that might
erupt if he looses.

Stage #5 -- Invisible

This is the final stage of drunkenness. At this point you can do
absolutely anything because no one can see you. You can get up and dance
on a table; you can strip down to your underwear, to impress the people
who have been admiring you all evening, because the rest of the people
in the room cannot see you. You are also invisible to the person whom
you have picked a fight with earlier in the evening. You can walk through
the streets singing at the top of your lungs (because of course you are
still smart and know the tune perfectly) and no one will think anything
of it because they can't see you. All your social inhibitions are
gone. You can do anything, because no one will know.

[cthomer5000]

lets drop a little Lou Reed tonight, since im having a few:

Some like wine some like hops
but what I really love is my scotch
It's the power, the power of positive drinking

Some people ruin their drinks with ice
and then they, they ask you for advice
They tell you, "I've never told anyone this before"
They say: "Candy is dandy but liquor makes quipsters."
and I don't like mixers, or sippers or sob sisters,
You know, you have to be real careful where you sit down
in a bar these days

And then some people drink to unleash their libidos
and other people drink to prop up their egos
It's my burdon, man, people say
I have the kind of face you can trust

The pow pow pow pow power of positive drinking
The pow pow pow pow power of positive drinking
The pow pow pow pow power of positive drinking
The pow pow pow pow power of positive drinking
The pow pow pow pow power of positive drinking

[Groundhog]

About to head out and celebrate my first pay day since my 21% pay rise. I expect to encounter some difficulties in walking home, but on the plus side I hopefully won't remember it come morning.

[Karlifornia]

Originally Posted by Groundhog

About to head out and celebrate my first pay day since my 21% pay rise. I expect to encounter some difficulties in walking home, but on the plus side I hopefully won't remember it come morning.

As the people in your part say: "Good on ya'...Cheers, mate"

[Izulde]

Had a pipe (tobacco) earlier and now I think I'll have a glass of wine to cap the night off before I head to bed.

[Logan]

Anybody else tonight?

[JeeberD]

I was drinking last night for the first time in three weeks. I had some bloodwork done for a life insurance policy and the result came back weird...one of my liver enzymes was WAY off. So until we found out exactly what was wrong, I had to lay off the booze just to be safe. Well, yesterday I got a call from the doc saying that my second round of bloodwork came back 100% normal, so first thing I did was hit the store to buy some Shiner.

It was glorious.

[Telle]

So what, nobody else getting drunk on a Thursday night? Silly people. Guess I'm all alone. Sooo... where'd I put that tequila??

[Karlifornia]

Originally Posted by Telle

So what, nobody else getting drunk on a Thursday night? Silly people. Guess I'm all alone. Sooo... where'd I put that tequila??

I'm trying to avoid getting drunk...but I'm definitely going for "comfortably tipsy" tonight....which will probably end up with me passed out on the couch with all the lights on, the TV going at full volume, and the faucet running for some reason.

[Telle]

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

I'm trying to avoid getting drunk...but I'm definitely going for "comfortably tipsy" tonight....which will probably end up with me passed out on the couch with all the lights on, the TV going at full volume, and the faucet running for some reason.

Hmmm.. an enviromentalist, you are not At least not while "comfortably tipsy"

[Karlifornia]

Originally Posted by Telle

Hmmm.. an enviromentalist, you are not At least not while "comfortably tipsy"

I gotta start thinking of the children. What about the children? My god...the children

[Telle]

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

I gotta start thinking of the children. What about the children? My god...the children

Oh god.. let's please NOT think of the children. Let me at least enjoy my drunkenness by NOT thinking of the damn children!!

[Karlifornia]

Originally Posted by Telle

Oh god.. let's please NOT think of the children. Let me at least enjoy my drunkenness by NOT thinking of the damn children!!

Okay...so no children...and I'm definitely against thinking of the elderly....I guess we're really starting to narrow it down...We can only think of:




Dick Clark, the eternal teenager!

[Telle]

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

Okay...so no children...and I'm definitely against thinking of the elderly....I guess we're really starting to narrow it down...We can only think of:




Dick Clark, the eternal teenager!

Animatronics rule!!!

[Greyroofoo]

Wow, this is an unholy place, one in I hope to avoid for a very long wild

[cartman]

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

Okay...so no children...and I'm definitely against thinking of the elderly....I guess we're really starting to narrow it down...We can only think of:




Dick Clark, the eternal teenager!

The man had a serious stroke, not cool....

Hey, what is Dick Clark doing in that pic???

[cartman]

Dola,

I had a bottle of amarone tonight with my steak. Awesome stuff.

[MikeVic]

I was pretty messed last night I think. Have a hang over right now, and friends said I looked juiced. Haven't had a hang over in I don't know how long!

[Karlifornia]

Originally Posted by MikeVic

I was pretty messed last night I think. Have a hang over right now, and friends said I looked juiced. Haven't had a hang over in I don't know how long!

I'm hungover, too..but I'm not half as excited about it as you are. Aye....pinche cabeza....

[MikeVic]

Originally Posted by Karlifornia

I'm hungover, too..but I'm not half as excited about it as you are. Aye....pinche cabeza....

Lol, I'm not excited... I just can't believe I am. I mean, I told myself I'm not gonna drink so much anymore but it happened. :P And no, I'm not an alcoholic or anything. I just hate the feeling of being hung over and out of commission the next day, and I told myself I would never be again. Guess I lied to myself.

[MrIllini]

Sing it with me...

Here comes The King, here comes the big Number One!
Budweiser beer, the king is second to none.
Just say Budweiser, you've said it all.
Here comes The King Of Beers, so lift your glass, let's hear the call.

Budweiser Beer's the one that's leading the rest,
And beechwood aging makes it beer at its best.
One taste'll tell you so loud and clear.
There's only one Budweiser beer, there's only one Budweiser beer!

When you say Bud there's nothing left you can say.
(When you say Bud!)
When you say Bud, The King is right on his way!
(When you say Bud!)
The King is coming, let's hear the call,
When you say Bud you've said it all.
When you say Bud you've said it all!
Ya da da da da da da da da da da
(Here comes The King...!)

[terpkristin]

Gosh, almost a week and no posts!
Well, I'm doing it right this Friday night, pizza + wine night. I haven't been even buzzed in quite awhile, and at the moment I'm quite frustrated with my hand, plus I've been craving pizza, sounded like a good time to do a pizza + wine night.

Wish the pizza were better or that the serious buzz I have going would make my hand hurt less, but what can you do?

Back to playing FFV Advance for me!

/tk

[RendeR]

I can't drink enough to get drunk =(

But I'm willing to test that theor with our brand new bottle of Yukon jack!

[KWhit]

Originally Posted by terpkristin

Gosh, almost a week and no posts!
Well, I'm doing it right this Friday night, pizza + wine night. I haven't been even buzzed in quite awhile, and at the moment I'm quite frustrated with my hand, plus I've been craving pizza, sounded like a good time to do a pizza + wine night.

Wish the pizza were better or that the serious buzz I have going would make my hand hurt less, but what can you do?

Back to playing FFV Advance for me!

/tk

If it's any consolation, I'm frustrated with my hand too.

[Greyroofoo]

Wow

[Lathum]

Originally Posted by RendeR

I can't drink enough to get drunk =(

But I'm willing to test that theor with our brand new bottle of Yukon jack!

SNAKEBITES!!

[cartman]

There's a new challenger to the Tito's throne for awesome vodka. Dripping Springs Vodka is the up and coming challenger. Where Tito's is distilled 7 times, DS is distilled 20 times!!! Both are products of Central Texas, but DS is distilled about 8 miles away from my house. At this point and time, it gets the nod for best premium vodka. Shots of it are getting chased with Cherry Coke Zero at the moment. And I'm going tubing on the Comal River tomorrow. Good times.

[Lorena]

Originally Posted by cartman

There's a new challenger to the Tito's throne for awesome vodka. Dripping Springs Vodka is the up and coming challenger. Where Tito's is distilled 7 times, DS is distilled 20 times!!! Both are products of Central Texas, but DS is distilled about 8 miles away from my house. At this point and time, it gets the nod for best premium vodka. Shots of it are getting chased with Cherry Coke Zero at the moment. And I'm going tubing on the Comal River tomorrow. Good times.

When I went to the liquor store they were trying to sell my on Dripping Springs Vodka saying that it's much smoother than Tito's. I had my mind set on Tito's but once it's gone, I'm getting some DSV.

So how was it?

[cartman]

Originally Posted by Dodgerchick

When I went to the liquor store they were trying to sell my on Dripping Springs Vodka saying that it's much smoother than Tito's. I had my mind set on Tito's but once it's gone, I'm getting some DSV.

So how was it?

It's about the same level as Tito's, really smooth. I wouldn't say it was much smoother, they are both really good. No hangover this morning, so I'd say the extra distilling steps work!

[Izulde]

Saw Dreams tonight. DAmn that girl st6ill look stupid fly. Too bad sh4e had to go and get married cuz I'd still tap that ass... and ooh damn her hugs be making lil Izulde do the happy happy joy joy dance. :happy:

[Greyroofoo]

This brings back curious feelings

[Greyroofoo]

Run!!!!!!!

[mckerney]

I am here again. My friend is i my bathroom throwing up from his Effen Black Cherry and Limeade (or as we call them, Astropops), though I am still drinking my Shiner Bock. Though he has made me pause the episode of Burn Notice, so I must turn to forms of internet entertainment while drinking.

[SunDevil]

How in the hell did this thread not get used in almost a month? Is everyone at AA?

[cartman]

Anyone heard from amdaily lately?

[Raiders Army]

It's almost your 2 year anniversary thread. Keep it going strong.

[Lorena]

I had a rough, rough week... that vodka is looking real nice right now. I might take 5 shots in a row the way I'm feeling.

[JeeberD]

I'm having some big, STRONG Cape Cods tonight. Vodka rocks.

The wife is off in Fort Worth visiting her mother who is visiting her best friend who had surgery a couple of weeks ago. That means Jeeber is home alone to get drunk and cruise the board for the first time in quite a while...

[Karlifornia]

Originally Posted by JeeberD

I'm having some big, STRONG Cape Cods tonight. Vodka rocks.

The wife is off in Fort Worth visiting her mother who is visiting her best friend who had surgery a couple of weeks ago. That means Jeeber is home alone to get drunk and cruise the board for the first time in quite a while...

Yeah, boi!

[Lorena]

Yikes, taking 3 shots in a row is kinda burning my throat... never done that before.

[JeeberD]

I need some food. Shoud I ingest:

Hot dogs with chili (but no buns)

Leftover Chicken Spaghetti

Piza Hut pizza (pepperoni, jalapeño, and mushrooms)

[Lorena]

Originally Posted by JeeberD

I need some food. Shoud I ingest:

Hot dogs with chili (but no buns)

Leftover Chicken Spaghetti

Piza Hut pizza (pepperoni, jalapeño, and mushrooms)

wow jeebs, spelling errors already?! the night is so young pizza withoug a doubt. piza + booz equals... something... I dunno.

[Lorena]

alright, i just had a shot and i have one at my desk.

this ones for you MOTHER FUCKERS!!

wHOA, that one seenmed a little strong. 5 shots down and not even 9pm... my lip is feeling a little numb. iu'm such a lightweight

[JeeberD]

Dammit...and I have a spell-check add-on in my Firefox. Pitiful...

[Lorena]

I can't believe i just edited a post while buzzing, whats up with that/? i'm feeling a nice buzz... haven't felt that in a while

[JeeberD]

Originally Posted by Dodgerchick

alright, i just had a shot and i have one at my desk.

this ones for you MOTHER FUCKERS!!

wHOA, that one seenmed a little strong. 5 shots down and not even 9pm... my lip is feeling a little numb. iu'm such a lightweight

*cough*

[Lorena]

Originally Posted by JeeberD

Dammit...and I have a spell-check add-on in my Firefox. Pitiful...

it's cuz you're buzzing jeebs... you'r buzzing. it's alright, i'm not very fond of the backspace button while intoxiccated

[Lorena]

Originally Posted by JeeberD

*cough*

who are you the grammar polie? i love this thread, it's great for post whoring

[JeeberD]

Fargin' HUSSIE!!!