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02-26-2003, 07:51 PM
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Godzilla Blitz's "Poop on the Golden Helmets (Year Two!) "
List of threads:
Year 1 Year 2 Year 3 Year 4 The Sage Continues.... ____________________________ Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz: 2002 A new year dawns! For those of you new to the dynasty, this is year two in our quest of bringing the mighty Notre Dame Fighting Irish to a national rank of #125. Yes, dead last. We will settle for nothing less. Unless they fire us, in which case we’ll go have a beer and mow the lawn. This thread picks up our story at the end of an 8-4 first year where the team ended #18. That leaves 107 spots to go to glory. Let’s move the story on. It has been a month since we have made progress... The past year is here: Poop On The Golden Helmets (Year 1) Last edited by Co-D'ohs : 05-07-2015 at 10:44 AM. |
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02-26-2003, 08:01 PM
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
2002 Preseason So much to do! Let’s start with email. We are so popular. There are 39 emails! Wow! Let’s take a look at all the news! First, we have only two players suspended due to bad grades. Both backups and both insignificant. Sigh. The bug that changed our defensive players' study time from 10 to 16 surely had an impact here, as we were hoping for more academic disaster with the library only open for an hour each day. And our damn syndicate coordinator was excellent at academic eligibility, so that clearly hurt us too. We can fix that, though. He he. However, the next cluster of four emails brings much better news. Thanks to the playing time bug, our best two DT’s and our best safety have left the team due to a lack of playing time! Sayonara! This will leave us in much better shape on defense, as the patched game will play our DT’s and safeties, and we should be weaker here. We also lost stud OT Sammy Harding, which is a wonderful loss too. He was also unhappy with his playing time. Sorry Sammy. Good news all around here. The next group tells us that 6 players lost their girlfriends due to lack of free time. You’re not married yet anyway. What do you need girlfriends for? In the largest group, 23 players bitch to me about their lack of free time. Wimps. This is Notre Dame. Get back on the field. Snicker snicker. Oh, yes, I feel the power. Also, our New England scout has quit. Actually, here I really do want to find the best replacement possible. Knowledge is key, and I don’t want to bring in some 10-rated recruit only to have him breakout into a star. So let’s go hire people! |
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02-26-2003, 08:02 PM
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#3 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
2002 Staff Hiring We can improve here. I’m sure of it. First let’s look at our syndicate coordinator: Leland White Academic Eligibility: Excellent Syndicate Investigations: Terrific Solicit Donations: Pretty Good This guy is a problem. He is clearly the reason that only two players are academically ineligible despite only 10-16% study time. Bye. And following Passacaglia’s excellent suggestion, we shall look for a replacement with high fundraising ability so that our performance rating there stays high enough so that we don’t get fired. I think that messing with bribing recruits can only increase our chances of getting fired, so we’ll look for a strong rating here as well. With a little bit of searching, we find our winner: Shane Sweeny Academic Eligibility: Terrible Syndicate Investigations: Very Good Solicit Donations: Excellent Welcome aboard Shane! Just bring in the cash, ok? Don’t worry about anything else! Let’s go to our Offensive Coordinator: Wesley Lindsay Play Calling: Decent Injury Avoidance: Pretty Good Rehabilitation: Very Good Congeniality: Lousy Quarterbacks: Excellent Running Backs: Decent Receivers: Very Good Offensive Line: Terrible Kickers: Decent Wing-Formation: 5 Years Time to do some major damage. This will be fun. Except for congeniality, we can look for the worst possible guy we can find. And the winner is… B.J. Brooks Play Calling: Terrible Injury Avoidance: Lousy Rehabilitation: Lousy Congeniality: Terrific Quarterbacks: Terrific Running Backs: Lousy Receivers: Poor Offensive Line: Lousy Kickers: Good Wing-Formation: 0 Years This guy was just too much humor to pass up. I stopped looking as soon as I found him. First, his name is BJ; enough said there. Second, take a look at those awesome injury and rehab ratings! This guy is a dream come true! And except for QB and kickers, he is pretty much miserable at his job! Great stuff. This is gonna be so much fun! I am getting so much more excited about the upcoming year. If we can hurt enough players, maybe some of our freshman will play! We actually decide to keep our defensive coordinator. We played pretty poorly on defense for the #18 team in the nation, and this guy must have played a factor: Defensive Coordinator Brain Longfellow Play Calling: Terrible Injury Avoidance: Lousy Rehabilitation: Poor Congeniality: Good Defensive Lineman: Decent Linebackers: Lousy Secondary: Lousy We also hire a new New England scout and replace our current Great Lakes scout with a more accurate one, but this stuff is starting to get boring so let’s move on to better things, the schedule! Revenge shall be ours, oh mighty Nebraska! |
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02-26-2003, 08:02 PM
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#4 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Whoops! Almost forget one detail here, and the details are important in a quest for perfection... We raise ticket prices by about 10%. We sold out last year and should be able to come close again this year. Higher prices means more cash means a better overall rating means less likelihood we will get fired for wetting the bed on the field. Strategy strategy strategy. We are cranking it up now. |
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02-26-2003, 08:03 PM
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#5 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
2002 Scheduling We try our best to get a rematch with Nebraska, who we beat last year when they were ranked #1, but they rebuff our best efforts. We give up, schedule a home game with last year’s #125 team Louisiana-Lafayette, and a home game with #39 Brigham Young too. Our schedule looks like this:
Notice that we have sold more than 11,000 less season tickets than last year. It will be nice to see some empty seats out there this year, but I better watch out. I don’t want to get fired. Also, we have a pretty weak schedule outside of the Michigan game. If we can lose some games, we may be able to drop quite a bit in the rankings. |
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02-26-2003, 08:04 PM
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#6 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
2002 Final Preparations Here is a look at our new and improved roster:
We are still talented at a lot of positions. RB Wolfe has become a god among men, and looks to follow in the footsteps of last year’s Darkside award winner, RB Floyd. ILB Percy Anderson and RB Devon Littleton have turned out to be the gems of last year’s recruiting class, though. Take a look at those double zero’s! Gotta love ‘em! In honor of Alf, we switch to the run-and-shoot, which should minimize the number of times that RB Wolfe gets the ball, and screw up our offense a bit. I am a bit concerned with this because we have depth at WR, but blame Alf if it doesn’t work. And now it’s time for one of the most fun things in the year: the coach’s position change of the year! Remember last year? I pick one player, the fans pick one player? Well, I’ll pick now, and then we’ll hold our 2nd Why Let One Person Have All the Fun Contest after the first or second game of the season! That’s where you the fans get to vote on who to change positions for our 2nd change of the season. First, my choice will follow our tactical consultant Alf’s advice again. Alf suggested making an OL the QB. I am going to change this a bit and select junior DE Wendell Goodwin to make the move to QB. At 6’2” and 248 pounds, Wendell has the prototype QB build. With DE ratings of 81/100, 71/86, and endurance of 100, Wendell should make a fine QB. Just think of Duante Culpepper and you see the obvious logic. Psst. Wendell. Wanna play QB? You do? Here you are. Take the first team. Sure, those big shoulder pads and full cage are fine. Have a ball buddy. We love ya! Time for the change… Oh, Wendell! Too bad! Your ratings fell to all 5’s across the board. What a shame! Oh, well, your potential is a 19, so you should be fine in a few years. Oh, yeah, I forgot. You’re a junior. The goal here, unless things have changed with the patch, is to fool our coaches. Last year, when we changed positions, the scout ratings stayed high, and as a result, ILB/P Don Stephens, with abysmal ability as a punter, started there even though he couldn’t kick a dead mouse farther than an old man pees. If all goes according to plan, our predictable coaching staff will start Wendell, whose scout ratings stayed high. Go Irish! Now let’s get to our time management settings. We’ll stick with what worked last year, but we want to handle our freshmen more carefully. We give them 22% study time, 10% weight lifting, 10% football study, and 23% free time. They should stay in school and be happy for a few years. We may mess with them further when it comes time to make the final push for #125. For everyone else, it’s our patented Notre Dame approach to football success: bookwork for the lineman and weightlifting for the backs. 35% practice. 10% study. 10% free time. And for those of you who are wondering, the old adage about all work and no play seems to be pretty much on target. Johnny may not be totally dull but judging by the 29 pissed off emails we got a week ago he sure is angry. Actually that didn’t take long at all. Most everyone was set from last year, so that is a good thing. Time to play ball!!! Let’s go Irish!!! It has been a long offseason. |
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02-26-2003, 08:05 PM
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#7 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kodos:
Yay!!! Godzilla Blitz is back from "Special Assignment"!!! Rejoice!!! I vote for quarterback Donovan Eggers. He's a sophomore, so he still has 3 years of crapulence to give to the team, and it avoids the awful chance that he could win some games from the quarterback position. Can he become a center? Maybe he's tired of groping someone else's ass; maybe it's time somebody groped his ass! Sorry if I'm awful premature here -- I'm just so excited!!!  |
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02-26-2003, 08:05 PM
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#8 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Kodos, Thank you sir, for your kind words! We have a surprise for you coming up in a couple of posts, so don't skip anything, ok? |
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02-26-2003, 08:07 PM
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#9 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Season Outlook I know, I know, play the dame game you are saying. But I really wanted to add a word about the upcoming season. It would be nice to fall to below 500, and there are a lot of factors working in our favor. We have a new offense, a horrible offensive coordinator, and some of our talented players have left or quit. Working against us is a weak schedule and a strong OL, WR, and RB corps. By far though, the biggest question is who wins the starting QB job. If ex defensive end Goodwin can get it, we could really suck, perhaps even win only two or three games all year? If he doesn’t start, the next QB isn’t strong yet, but our receiving crew is pretty good and we should march to an over 500 season at the least. Prediction: 6-5 |
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02-26-2003, 08:08 PM
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#10 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 1 Recruiting Time to hit the recruiting trail once again. Let’s see who loves us this year. Last year we got by pretty cheaply. Let’s see if Buddha is still with our quest… Yes! Only two players idolize us this year! One QB rated a 14 and one WR rated a little high at 29. Baa baa. By obligation, I offer them scholarships and continue the search for more talent. I may actually try to move up academically this year, as I am a bit worried about getting the axe. The ideal candidate will be academically safe, say a 3.2 with 1200 SAT scores, and absolutely suck on the field. But before we get there let’s start with the search for the 2002 Rudy Scholarship Winner. This year, in a new format, we are going to select the three candidates who have the best combination of stupidity and football ineptitude, then give the Scholarship to the first one who accepts our scholarship offer. If Gary Brock, last year’s winner, is any indication of what will happen this year, the decision could go down to the wire. For all of those out there that have forgotten, Mr. Brock took ten weeks to make up his mind about the free ride to Notre Dame, despite having no football abilility and no brains. Let’s get this thrilling search underway! It takes a while, but here they are. This year’s Rudy Scholarship candidates: S Marshall Chapman from Brea-Olinda HS in Brea, CA. The clear leader, Marshall is rated a 5 at his position, and brings a 1.80 GPA, 571 SAT. WR Lionell Cooley from Russell County HS in Phenix City, AL. 1.87 GPA, 618 SAT, 14 rating OT Jake Finch from Herbert E. Lehman HS in the Bronx. 1.83 GPA. 650 SAT. 9 rating. We offer all these guys scholarships and we’ll let them fight it out for the rest of the year. Once we get our winner, we’ll revoke the offers to the others. The goal is to see if we can graduate any of these scholarship winners. Be sure to root loudly! We also begin our legitimate recruiting. RB is distinctively thin on low-rated, academically safe students, but guard is a treasure trove. 5 perfect zeros with safe academics! We make phone calls to all five, toss out a couple of scholarship offers and get ready for our first game of the year. Here we come, Brigham Young! Game 1 Pregame I have sweet news for all of you out there with your beer and chips in hand as you eagerly await the start of the season. Yes, Wendell Goodwin has won the job of starting QB for our highly touted run & shoot offense! This is by far the best news we could have! Oh, the sweet interceptions he will toss. The frustration he can create! Dare we dream that we could go winless with him at the helm? If so, we could gain the coveted title this year! Is this too much to consider? Let’s see as we head into our first game! #39 Brigham Young comes to South Bend to face us, ranked #20. Game Oh oh. We could be in trouble. Get this. Goodwin’s first pass hits for 29 yards. His second pass is a 43-yard TD strike to RB Wolfe. It only gets worse from there. His line for the day: 27 for 44, 457 yards, 4TD’s. He did manage to throw 3 interceptions, but everything else overshadowed this. That line about Culpepper is sounding a little bit too true right now. He appears tough too. He got hurt, but stayed in the game. The rest of our game was just as bad, as we beat up Brigham Young to the tune of 62-21. We scored every way possible. Fumble return. Kick return. Interception return. It was a nightmare. We had ten sacks too. And even Wolfe, limited to only 14 carries, managed to get 97 yards for himself on the ground, and another 105 receiving. What a horrible start to the year. There goes our dream of #125 this year. Record 1-0 Looking at our injury report though, it does appear that we have some good news. Goodwin did break his finger and is listed as probable for next week. We had a major injury to backup FB Juan Benitez, who tore knee ligaments and will be out for 26 weeks. He’s played his last game. Let’s give a big cheer for our offensive coordinator BJ Brooks(lousy, lousy at injuries), who twisted Juan’s knee around a bit at the half, proclaimed it a sprain, and sent him back in the game. Way to go, BJ. |
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02-26-2003, 08:08 PM
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#11 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Yes! It's that time again! It's the 2nd Annual Why Let Only One Person Have All the Fun Contest! Ok, let’s pick up our spirits. Getting this accomplished in two years would have been amazing, and we still obviously have some good players left. Let’s take care of one of them with our 2nd annual Why Let Only One Person Have All the Fun Contest! Yahoo! Again, the rules are simple. I’ll pick a few candidates and you vote on the one for this year’s people’s choice position change. Remember for your vote to count, you’ve got to include a derogatory mark about Notre Dame. And for all you lurkers/ex-lurkers out there, this is your chance to get your big post #1. Don’t be shy. Join the fun! Let’s have a big turnout this year! Here are the ballot candidates, but feel free to pick someone else. I couldn’t find a solid junior or sophmore to nix, so all my candidates are seniors. Again, if you see someone you like that’s not on the list, vote for them. 1. RB Lonnie Wolfe (senior, last year). Our second highest rated player, he was a force in game one. Ferocious runner and good hands. Only drawback is that this is his last year, and we have a stud junior behind him. 2. G Thurman Shultz. (senior, last year). I see nothing. This guy is our highest rated player, nearly maxed out at all ratings. 3. WR Duane Loendorf. (senior, last year). Our best receiver on an offense that just racked up 457 yards through the air. 4. OLB Doug Mackie. (senior, one year remaining) This guy was all over the place in game one, racking up three tackles on BYU’s 19 running plays, sacking the QB once, hurrying him once, and blocking two passes as well. Nice thing is he has more than this year left. And new this year, the Kodos Nominee. For those of you who don’t know him, Kodos is the inspiration behind this dynasty. He is the father of the “anti-dynasty”, and is currently fighting the good fight out of Gatesville, TX, against the Cowboys of Dallas. Be sure to go read all about it! In honor of him, he gets to name a nominee! And his choice is… 5. QB Donovan Eggers. (sophomore, 3 years left). Kodos excellent strategy here is sacrifice the present for the future. Eggers has a 98 potential and will be a star next year. Although, he will play backup to Goodwin this year, he would start if Goodwin got hurt. By nixing him, we wipe out three solid years of football. Well, there you have it. We’ll run the contest till Tuesday midnight South Bend time, which is I think in the same time zone as Beijing. So hit that reply button, post your player of choice, add an anti-Notre Dame comment (again, keep it clean for all our 12-year-old readers), and join in the fun of destroying someone’s chances to go pro! It’s a blast! The first vote counts double, so act now! I’ll be back late Tuesday night or early Wednesday morning to tally results and move on with more 2002 Notre Dame football action. Go Irish!!!! Yeehaw!!! |
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02-27-2003, 07:23 PM
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#12 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Archer219:
My vote is for Joey Murray, a potent wide reciever of the future. I think Joey said something about not wanting to be hit anymore, so my suggestion, give him single bar mask and let him kick or punt. Either one will work. |
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02-27-2003, 07:24 PM
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#13 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Alf:
My bad for the converted big man to QB who can perform the run&shoot offense ?! How come ? I was just trying to help  although I might dare to say I am a Notre Dame fan thanks to Joe Montana.I vote for choice #5 QB Eggers. It is simply too risky to have this guy step in in case our dauntesque QB injures himself. I would convert him to Fullback. Fullback are very useful in Run&Shoot offenses Long live the path to Notre Dame decline. A former Dynasty is quietly dying... (that is my anti ND comment for my vote to count) |
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02-27-2003, 07:24 PM
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#14 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kekkonen:
My vote goes to an outside candidate, RB Keith Hendrick. This is why: you can't suck real bad this year, so don't get greedy. Don't worry if Eggers gets to start at QB -- he's not a real star yet. He may be next year, which is the perfect time to introduce him to the secrets of placekicking (assuming you can't make him an offensive lineman). Your #1 RB is a stud, but he's gone next year. Hendrick has 3 years of eligibility left, and will come back to haunt you unless you turn him into a punter or something equally valuable (I was looking at your DT material... if you can make Henrdick a DT, he should be an immediate contributor there -- especially if he's a real small git). Plus, there is an outside chance that your real stud RB Wolfe will get hurt, and by nixing Hendrick, your backup will be a lot less competent. Even that won't lead you down to Brock Gray quite yet, but it'll help. Oh yeah, and Notre Dame is ... wait. I can't think of anything more derogatory than "Notre Dame". Will that do? |
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02-27-2003, 07:25 PM
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#15 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Vaj:
I think Doug Mackie could provide some needed depth at safety. I wouldn't worry too much about Eggers -- you can always switch to the wishbone next year. Besides, can you really trust that Alf character?  A (fitting?) anagram for Notre Dame is ant rode me. |
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02-27-2003, 07:26 PM
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#16 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kekkonen:
Originally posted by Vaj: A (fitting?) anagram for Notre Dame is ant rode me. Or Me Not Read, which I believe is where Coach Blitz's academic program would be headed, if he had the appointment for life... |
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02-27-2003, 07:27 PM
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#17 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by QuitedaberrieS:
It has to be G Thurman Shultz. What a perfect move to put your best OL in the secondary!! Recievers will fly be him as him falls on his butt!! The guy's name is Thurman. Thurman Shultz. That in itself is enough reason to start this guy at cornerback. Long live the demise of the Drunken Irish... |
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02-27-2003, 07:27 PM
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#18 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Marmel:
WR Loendorf was mentioning to the Defensive coaches how he idolizes those guys in the trenches. He really wants to be a Defensive end and mix it up with those big Offensive linemen. I say we give him the chance. Notre Dame: No Other Team's Roster Exhibits Dumbasses As Much. Excellent! |
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02-27-2003, 07:28 PM
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#19 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by DukeRulesMAB:
I vote for Mackie...gotta love that he has 2 years left. And building on last year's success, I say we move him to kicker. Nothing helps a team more than a guy who shanks 19 yard FGs! Oh yeah...and Rudy continues to be the worst movie ever made that doesn't involve Ah-nold and ice puns. |
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02-27-2003, 07:28 PM
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#20 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by jerk3616:
Ok...so here's the plan... I say WR Duane Loendorf winds up playing OL on your QB's blind side...nothing is more intimidating than standing behind center knowing you have 3 snaps to live. |
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02-27-2003, 07:30 PM
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#21 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by CubsFan915:
You couldn't find a sophomore to move? Man, I'm with Kodos in my vote to move QB Donovan Eggers... I think he'd make a great cover corner... Or maybe a tight end... I like the blindside tackle idea, too... He could lead Notre Dame down the path of sucktitude! (Does that count as anti-Notre Dame? I can do better if you'd like...) |
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02-27-2003, 07:31 PM
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#22 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by revrew:
Hmmm, I seem to remember nominating LoneDork last year, and did you listen to me? Huh? No, of course not. Now look at the fine mess you got yourself into. Gotta go with King Kodos here. Wipe out Egger (remember that name from Men in Black?) Elimate the QB for years to come. How could you risk ever having a potential 98 at the QB? The Soph with potential 55 is your new leader and the whole position becomes pathetic. So fry the Egger. Put him on the OL so you can have Eggers and Pancakes! Nix Out The Repulsive, Emasculated, Drunk, And Moronic Eggers! |
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02-27-2003, 07:32 PM
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#23 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Airhog:
I have to go with kodos and his QB, you dont want this guy winning any games for ya. maybe he would like catching the ball rather that throwing it. of course seeing how you like your qb's to bulk up, he might do pretty well as a G or T. Long Live Drunk Fighting Irish! |
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02-27-2003, 07:32 PM
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#24 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kodos:
Eggers! Eggers!! Eggers!!! Damn the Irish and their oily hides! P.S. Thanks for the special honor of allowing me to select my very own nominee! I hope he does as much to bring down the program as any man ever has! Your humble mentor and fan, Kodos  |
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02-27-2003, 07:33 PM
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#25 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by jerk3616:
Rats...forgot about the "rag on ND or your vote doesn't count" part. Uhhh...ND is for sissies? (DOH!!! I HATE IT when I can't think of the cool thing to say. And right when I get done with this post, the right thing will come to me. I HATE IT when that happens!!)  |
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02-27-2003, 07:35 PM
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#26 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Carligula:
Here's another vote for Eggers... QB is just too essential to be left in the hands of someone with demonstrable talent. And may your dramatic progress with the football team be a shining example to Notre Dame's other athletic programs, so the following will begin making the rounds (tasteless variation on a tasteless joke...) What do you call a guy with no arms or legs who gets thrown into the water? Bob. What do you call a Notre Dame student with no arms or legs who gets thrown into the water? The captain of the swimming team. |
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02-27-2003, 07:36 PM
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#27 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Sorry for the rain delay there folks, but I think it is finally midnight in Beijing! Thank you all for posting your entertaining remarks and votes! "ME NOT READ". Har! Too funny! And quite the logical arguments for nixing one guy over the other! The lobbying was intense. I could see the smoking keyboards! Let's tally up the results. Oh, the suspense is immense! Scroll slowly if you want to see it play out in real time. (totals in parentheses) Archer...Murray (2 votes for being first in line) Alf...Eggers (1) Kekkonen...Hendrick (2, bonus vote for ME NOT READ) Vaj...Mackie (1) Quackenberry...Shultz (1) Marmel...Lonedork (1) DukesRules...Mackie (2) CubsFan...Eggers (2) revrew...Eggers (3) Airhog...Eggers (4) Kodos...Eggers (6, nominee double vote) jerk...Lonedork (2) Carligula...Eggers (7) And there you have it! Eggers is this year's "Why Let One Person Have All the Fun" Position Change Contest winner. I've got to run off to the State Fair today to do see the mombo pig but I will be back tomorrow AM, I promise, to perform the sex change on Eggers. I'd like to make him the kicker but I don't think he would start there as our kickers current ratings are Godlike, so we'll see if we can find someplace where the current starter's current ratings are lower than his and probably make the change there. Center does sounds kind of tempting. Or DE/DT. I think QB's love to play there don't they? |
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02-27-2003, 07:37 PM
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#28 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kodos:
Wow! I got two votes! |
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02-27-2003, 07:37 PM
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#29 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by revrew:
Hold on before making Eggers a DE. Theoretically, QB's are some of the best athletes on the team. Sure, he'd be undersized, but you don't want to unleash a fast, slippery Eggers to go after other QB's or wreak havoc by squeezing into the backfield. I still think O-Line would be better. Perhaps take over Ian Clancy's future spot at Guard? |
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02-27-2003, 07:38 PM
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#30 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Alf:
What about a FB for Eggers ? Or even better, switch him to a position where you are already loaded with players. Players can leave due to lack of playing time, so if you load at one position... bye bye Eggers |
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02-27-2003, 07:38 PM
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#31 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Kodos: You are the force, Kodos. And technically you were the first to vote, but you voted before the contest even began! Maybe that should count for three votes? revrew: Unfortunately, as you shall soon see, Egghead was not big enough to turn into a lineman. But I think we got the desired result anyway. Alf: I have a house rule (#4B-C178) that makes me "try to maintain a reasonably balanced roster", but it is a nice idea to overload one position. FB was almost what I went for, but...well, enough, let's post it up here so you can see... |
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02-27-2003, 07:39 PM
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#32 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 2 Well, it’s well after midnight in Beijing, time to call in Mr. Eggers and tell him he just doesn’t have any potential at QB. At 6’0”, 195 pounds, we aren’t given the option of making him into a lineman, so our two logical choices left are FB or OLB. FB might be a good choice, but I don’t know what kind of offense we may have in two years when he would be at his best and I think he may have some chance of actually developing into a respectable FB. We already have two phenomenal sophomore OLB’s, so putting him here in effect makes him a towel boy, which just seems perfect for a potential Heisman QB. Donnie, could you step into my office? You threw an incomplete pass in practice today Donnie, and the coaches and I were thinking that you might not have what it takes to be a starting QB. Look at your size compared to Wendell Goodwin! You’re more than 50 pounds lighter than he is. To make this short Donnie Boy, here’s number 57. Go see our defensive coordinator. He’ll introduce you to something called an Oklahoma drill. Donnie’s new OLB ratings… Run Defense 4/4 Pass Rush 4/4 Man-to-man Defense 4/4 Zone Defense 4/4 Endurance 100/100 Special Teams 4/4 Oops. Looks like he lost a step there. But, my, he is in good shape, isn’t he? Let’s see what kind of condition he’s in two years from now. Thanks again to all who voted and participated! This was the best turnout ever! Let’s try out our new and improved towel boy in action! Recruiting The goal this year is to balance our roster as best we can with low football talent. The more I think about this noble quest, the more I think about how much of a shame it would be to come short of our goal by getting fired—that ominous threat that is always hanging over our heads. So I am going to get some brighter players in here and actually try to support the academic end of things a bit more with the newer recruits. Maybe if they are brighter they will be able to better reflect upon and suffer from the failures they have as men on the gridiron. With that in mind we scatter some scholarship offers over the lamest, bright football players we can find. Our idolizers are coming to town. Our Rudy Scholarship candidates are considering their options. Game This should be a test. Ranked #10, we travel to #18 Purdue to play a game the oddmakers say is even. Is Goodwin a Culpepper clone or a one-time flash in the pan? The coaches have him starting with his broken finger and all; maybe that will lead to a few more interceptions. QBEggers doesn’t even show up on the depth chart. Such a pity. Towel boy, where’s my orange? The result Yes! Defeat!!!! We did it. Final tally Purdue 27, Notre Dame 17, but it was a squeaker that went right down to the wire! And wait till you hear what our hero Goodwin did! First, here’s his line: 13-34, 193 yards, 1TD, 4 Int. Much much better than last week! He started right off with a bang. He gave Purdue the ball deep in our territory with a interception on the second Notre Dame possession. Purdue managed to botch that chance, but soon after that Goodwin had the ball deep in Purdue territory after a Notre Dame interception. He managed to get himself sacked and cough up the ball to Purdue! Way to pee points down the drain, Goody! RB Wolfe is such a pain in the butt that we actually were tied 17-17 with 6 minutes left in the game, Notre Dame ball, first and ten from our own 34. But Goodwin saved his best for last, for on the second play of this drive, he throws his 3rd interception of the day. Purdue makes the short hike in for the score, and we go down by 7 with 2 minutes to go! On the next possession, Goodwin throws his 4th interception of the day, the coupe de grace for us. Purdue adds a meaningless field goal with 13 seconds left to end the scoring. What a fine all around effort! Clearly, the Kekkonen Game Ball goes to Mr. Goodwin for his all around stellar effort today. He just may be the player we had hoped he would be! Way to go, Goody! Keep it up! Record 1-1 |
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02-27-2003, 07:39 PM
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#33 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 3 Recruiting Levon Ingram, a guard from Reno HS in Reno, NV, will be the first perfect zero this year making the trip to South Bend sometime soon. And there is a lot of zero talent out there this year! Could be a bumper crop. Chapman, Cooley, and Finch are still thinking… Game Pregame The benchmark. The promised land. The standard against which all will be measured. The candy store. This week we play last year’s #125th ranked team, Louisiana-Lafeyette, at home. They currently stand at #115 but that is more due to playing and losing one game compared to other team’s losing two games than it is due being a better team. Time for a litmus test. I have no idea what to expect… The result I bring bad news. We have a long road to travel. We are not even close to that magical, euphoric moment when all our effort and toil will explode into the burning enlightenment of reaching the coveted #125 (Whoa, what drugs did I do today? Where did that sentence come from?) Anyway, to put it plainly, we are still a damn good football team. Notre Dame 49, Louisiana-Lafeyette 3. We absolutely crushed them. It was as if their defense wasn’t even on the field. Having said that, if we look hard, there were harbingers, shall we say, of better days in the midst of all this carnage. First, it was not an 80-0 blowout. Second, Louisiana-Lafeyette (What gives with the school name? Did its mommy school keep her maiden name after marriage and then give the baby school a split last name?) had 12 first downs, 82 yards on the ground, 102 yards in the air; in short, they moved the ball against us. Third, we punted once. But all in all it was ugly. Goodwin chucked 4 TD’s, had 349 yards in the air. RB Wolfe again proved that he is a lock on the 2002 Darkside Award by running for 121 yards and catching passes for 183 more. Nothing to do but get back to work… Record 2-1. Rank 38 |
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02-27-2003, 07:40 PM
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#34 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 4 Looking over stats, I realize some good news. Some of our freshman are starting to see some limited action! Most of them have played in all the games, one could assume it was on special teams. But a couple of them have things like tackle assists which means they are getting into the game. We are starting to sew the seeds. First a crack, then a crumble. I thought this might be a good time to take a moment and fill you in on how our position changes from last year are doing. Well P Don Stephens is now completely on the bench. Some stud is punting and Don doesn’t get to play much any more. Last year's Most Valuable Loser, ILB Butch Landdeck, has played five defensive plays all year, and hasn’t had much of an opportunity to get himself hurt yet. He has one tackle. What about OLB Eggman? Well, he has not stepped onto the field outside of special teams. And time outs, when he is towel runner for the center. He he. Recruiting Not much news to report here. We get another visitor but it is early so there isn’t much movement in recruits yet. Of course our Rudy candidates are “considering” their options… Game Pregame The opposite end of the spectrum. #6 Michigan comes to town today. A solid win here would hurt. Be nice to think we are making some progress. The result For three quarters it is a back-and-forth offensive battle which we lead by a 4-11 points. But our offense is too much for Michigan and we pull away and win 45-24 in what becomes a rout. After the Purdue game, I was certain Goodwin (Ominous name? Should I have seen the omen?) was a one-time fluke, but look at these numbers today! 21-41, 329 yards, 3 TD’s, no int’s. And this against the #6 team in the nation! What is going on? Once again I am not so sure we haven’t created a monster. Also, RB Wolfe had 146 yards on the ground. This is turning out to be some one-two punch. Check out these stats so far: QB Goodwin (85 for 150 (56.6%), 1328 yds, 12 TD’s, 8 int’s, 146.7 rating) RB Wolfe (73 carries for 480 yards, 19 catches for 358 yards, 8 TD’s total) Yikes! Record 3-1. Rank 27 Well, it is late here and I am getting sleepy. The annoying Microsoft Word Paperclip, official mascot of the TCY Fighting Irish, is blinking wearily, telling me that perhaps I best be to bed. And although I am tempted to play one more, weary warriors make mistakes. I want to be at my bushy tailed brightest when taking on the minions of South Bend. Off to bed we go! We’ll be back soon! Thanks for tuning in! Don’t get discouraged by our lack of progress. We’ll get ‘em yet! Go Irish!!! Yeehaw!!! |
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02-27-2003, 07:41 PM
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#35 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 5 First quarter report cards are in boys and girls and boy do I have news for us. Mind you, this is the first quarter report, so let’s not get too excited, but we have 67 students whose low grade is a D+ or worse! That’s right! 67! Boy, are these kids’ parents gonna be pissed! Of these 67, only 7 are E’s, so we still have some work to do, but wow. This could really clean out some of the talent in the upper ranks! Maybe too much, I wonder. Will they fire me for academically disqualifying over half the roster? In the real NCAA probably yes? What about in the Good God Gindin’s NCAA? We shall see, but I am touched by tremors of nervousness now. Could this lead to the dreaded axe? I hope that I have time to kick in the “improve academics, deprove football” strategy, but it can’t be this year. But enough of the negative thoughts, let’s talk about a true success story for a moment… Any of you out there remember Brock Gray from last year? He was our 2001 Notre Dame Rudy Scholarship winner as the dumbest student in America with no football ability? Well, he got a report card too, just like everyone else. Now, the goal here with this little side story is to see if we could take Brock and get him to make it through four years of college despite his 0 intelligence and 0 aspiration, so this report card represents the first step in this journey, but I am pleased to tell you that he has 2 C-‘s, 2 B’s, and a B+! Not bad there, eh? We do have a tutor working with him, but still, pretty damn good if I say so myself. Way to go Brock! Here’s an hour with Candy as a little reward! Recruiting The race for the 2002 Rudy Scholarship continues and let’s check in with our contestants. Let’s see…WR Cooley…“considering”…OT Finch…“considering”…safety Chapman…“considering”. Well, there you have it. These wizards’ wheels are churning as they decide what to do. Anyone feel like you are watching a turtle race? I sure do. Come on, guys, it’s not that hard! You have one scholarship offer, you suck at football, and no one else has even prank called you from another college for the first month of your senior season. You can do it! Think, what should you do! Hint: make a visit! Let’s see if that works. Elsewhere, we’re pretty much set, as we have established the Notre Dame system of recruiting after last year’s rookie season and are just tweaking it to bring in better academic students. We have our candidates on the line, and just bug them with visits and phone calls. Ten visits are forthcoming as the sheep trickle towards the slaughterhouse. Game Pregame 18-point favorites on the road at Utah State, a game broadcast on TV5. We could use a loss but I have little hope here considering our last two victories. We’re pretty healthy too. I was hoping for more injury disasters but not to be had yet. The Result Ugly. Utah State is lame with a capital L. Notre Dame 37, Utah State 3. I think the only time Utah State got into our half of the field was after one of Goodwin’s interceptions. Who, by the way, except for a tendency to chuck an occasional pickoff, had an unbelievable day again: 26 for 40, 409 yards, 2 TD’s, 2 int’s. We have created a monster. Frankenstein is loose in our backfield. Stop beeping at me, stupid paper clip. Record 4-1. Rank 16. Oh no. We are going the wrong way. |
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02-27-2003, 07:42 PM
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#36 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 6 Hey, wow! I do have some good news for us from last week’s game. WR Jumbo Henson, our second best receiver, dislocated an elbow and is out for 14 weeks, which should just about do in his season. And stud OLB Doug Mackie pulled a quad and is out for 10 weeks. Let’s give a big cheer for humans in pain! Yahoo! This could help, as Henson is a strong element in our passing game and Mackie was among the leaders in most defensive categories. Call Eggers when you want a towel, guys, ok? Enjoy the bench. Recruiting Turtle race update: all three still considering. I call and visit, as I do weekly. We get our first idolater on board. Rod Brady, a 14+ QB from Central Perry HS in Leopold, Indiana joins the fold. This guy could be a problem, as he could be our highest rated QB within two years. Humm. What to do? Game Off Week. |
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02-27-2003, 07:42 PM
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#37 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 7 Recruiting Whoa! WR Cooley takes the lead in the Rudy Scholarship race, as he has decided to visit! Finch and Chapman are still clueless. Way to go Cools! You are the man. Next step, acceptance form. You are almost there! A lot of visitors now. I am busy showing them the facilities. No new acceptances, and no one, I mean no one, refuses us. Game Pregame Troy State. Yes, Troy State. Actually up to #90 this year in the rankings, but don’t get optimistic here. They have no chance of winning. Matter of fact, the rest of our schedule is so easy that I wonder if we will lose again this year? With Goodwin the stud that he is, our offense can’t be stopped. Miracle man, we need you now! The Result Miracle man was out to lunch, as we whip Troy State 59-14. Yikes. It was pretty bland again. A taste: Troy State got the opening kickoff. With less than 4 minutes gone in the first quarter, they trailed 14-0. We led at the half, 49-7. The good news is that our second stringers seemed to get in a lot in the second half, and we only won that half 10-7. So maybe there is hope next year? Record: 5-1. Rank 13. Well, that’s all I can take for right now. I am a bit down. We have won 4 in a row and I need a shot of optimism. But, I’ll be around over the weekend, and hope to play a little every day, so with any luck there will be more Notre Dame action to look forward to as the college season kicks into high gear this weekend. Thanks again for being a part of the action, and don’t forget that even if we fail here, QB Devecchia, or whatever, will be leading the real Irish into Lincoln before we know it, and Nebraska is a robust 62-2 there over the past, um, well anyway, for quite a while. So there is always that to look forward to. But don’t fear! I won't give up our quest. I know the words of Conan O’Brien, who said: When you fall down in life, you get up. And when you fall again, you get up. And when you fall again, you get up. And if you keep doing that, eventually, people will think you are really drunk. Go Irish!!! Yeehaw!!! |
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02-27-2003, 07:43 PM
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#38 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kodos:
Dear Godzilla Blitz: As a concerned fan, I have to ask the unaskable question -- what will you do in the nightmare scenario of getting fired?  Will you reload and start again from scratch, or will you close the door forever on the noblest dynasty ever known to man? Your faithful public needs to know!Your humble fan, Kodos Thank god I remembered to shut off coach firings in my Bill Gates dynasty, or I would have been done about 8 seasons ago... |
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02-27-2003, 07:44 PM
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#39 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Dear Kodos, Thank you for your kind concern! Deep down inside, I just can't see me getting fired, that is, if there really are Gods and Santa in the world. It's just too inconceivable that a benevolent force would allow this quest to fail. Nevertheless, I think the question may need to be addressed, although I shiver, head spin, and power vomit at the thought of getting fired. What to do? Defeat would be a crushing blow, and I would need a bit of time and a lot of drugs to overcome the pain. I think any real answer could only come after that. But I tell you, I would at least continue the noble fight. Rumor has is that there is an electronic opening on the Boston Red Sox on my disk of Baseball Mogul 2002, so maybe an opportunity would pan out to take on the Yankees of New York (sorry Marmel). Also, Championship Manager has need of someone to run (down) Manchester United, I have heard, though I have no firm plan of action there yet. Or maybe there would indeed be a Notre Dame Challenge II, we could call it "Revenge of the Poop", but perhaps it could take a different form. Maybe a village challenge or something? Wouldn't that be a gas! Or maybe someone else would like to carry the torch for a while? So, to make a long paragraph longer in hopes or reaching a point, I just don't know, but I will never, no never, give up the grander struggle. I will say though, that the risk of getting fired adds a huge element of excitement to the quest. It is not just a matter of when, but more a matter of if. And knowing that you could be gone at any second reminds me of the Mekong Delta back in '68, but that's another story better told in a thread of its own. I think though, that if I did an indirect attempt at bringing destruction to an organization, such as you are doing through Gatesville to Dallas, I would indeed have selected the "no firings" option. Your task is so much harder than mine; with indirect control over an organization's demise, the "if" element of the quest is already there. Sincerely, Godzilla Blitz |
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02-27-2003, 07:45 PM
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#40 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kodos:
Yeah. I'm wondering if it really is possible to run another team out of town, but my team has not been good enough to figure that out. Yet. I think Gatesville is on the brink of being good enough to have an adverse effect on Dallas if the game actually factors that sort of stuff in. If I win some Super Bowls and still seem to have no adverse effect on the Cowboys' fortunes, then it will become obvious that my method cannot work, in which case, I would have to go with mysterious Plan B to bring about their destruction. BWAAH-HAAA-HAAAAAA!!!!!! |B^} Anyhow, I sincerely hope you do not get fired and that the Poop dynasty goes on for many seasons, as I do enjoy it so. Kodos |
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02-27-2003, 07:45 PM
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#41 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
I would strongly think that the game does factor in proximity. It does have all that "number of teams within (certain radius)" info, and that would leave me to believe that fans are pulled back and forth from teams depending upon, one would hope, team success. I bet it can be done. Easy, no, but possible. And the force will be with you, so all is possible. But if it doesn't, well, plan B will be interesting, I am sure. Would it have anything to do with a new job opening? I'm glad you enjoy the dynasty; it has been so much fun to write and play. I started on a whim, and thoguht that it would be a ten entry joke dynasty. Likewise, I enjoy reading of the adventures of Gatesville a lot, and stumbled onto this idea from reading your dynasty and a random comment that Buc made in a different thread. |
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02-27-2003, 07:47 PM
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#42 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Marmel:
Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz: so maybe an opportunity would pan out to take on the Yankees of New York (sorry Marmel). Sincerely, Godzilla Blitz Although it would pain me to see even a simulation of the Yankee dynasty crumbling before my eyes, I would applaud the effort. To bring down the Yankees, it would take more than a man. It would be a bigger job than taking down the Irish, the Cowboys, the United, The NBA (oh wait, you say Stern has already done that, OK) all together. But if one man can do it, if one man has the ingenuity to do it, than that man would be you GB (no offense Kodos ) and I give you my whole-hearted approval and support if that is the direction your career in franchise demolition takes you.I think I got into your drug stash GB. Oh well. |
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02-27-2003, 07:47 PM
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#43 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 8 We got some press in the school newspaper! Here it is, straight and unedited… The Observer / October 14, 2002 Are our Fighting Irish Gettin Some? (South Bend) Not many of them are gettin as much as you may think. Although football players have a reputation for attracting women likes pigs do flies, and our beloved Irish are currently 5-1 and #13 in the nation, only 33 players on the current squad are dipping their sticks on a regular basis. That’s right, in a recent survey of sexual mores on this year’s squad, less than half of the 84 players claimed to have girlfriends. “I want to, but head coach Blitz keeps us on the field for six hours a day. Then we have to lift weights for six hours after that,” harped senior star running back Lonnie Wolfe. “Look at me! I’ve got ten TD’s in six games, got more yards than a fabric store, been on the cover of ESPN, and I haven’t gotten laid in three months! Hell, I can’t remember the last time I had time to go to a party, forget about score with a chick. On any other campus in the US, I’d have seven girlfriends—one for each day of the week. Here, zilch. Zippo. Nada. Hey, will I need to go to confession for saying this?” Six hours a day of practice, followed by six hours of weightlifting, plus a full classload sure seems to be a daunting schedule for the players. Something’s gotta give, and apparently women are the things that don’t make the grade here at Notre Dame. “Free time? What’s that?” asks senior linebacker Butch Landdeck. “I haven’t been on a date for two years now since coach Blitz took over. Did I tell you I used to be the starting QB?” Burps freshman runningback Brock Gray, the 2001 Rudy Scholarship Winner, “No, I don’t have a girlfriend. Most girls have cooties, anyway, so I don’t want to get sick. But sometimes when I fumble a lot in practice, Coach, um, lets me play with this really nice girl called Candy. She makes me feel happy whee. Reminds me of my sister.” This lack of physical expression seems to have its consequences, according to trainer Scooper Young. “We see a lot of questionable injuries like severe wrist sprains and stuff like that. Never had ‘em before Blitz took over. Now we get ‘em all the time. Last week, Hugh Lap, that defensive end over there, went home after the Troy State game fine. Came in the next day with a torn thumb ligament. I think the problem is some of the guys are so tired that it takes ‘em a while to, well, hey, you quotin me on this? Damn you, Lap’s gonna bust my head if he knows I said this. Give me that corder.” Sorry, Scooper, the truth must be told. What does Coach Blitz have to say about this? “Catholic school. No sex allowed unless they are married. No one is married and therefore no sex. There is no problem. My boys are happy. We are winning. I have great plans for them.” Makes sense, but this reporter swears he heard Blitz laughing behind his closed office door as I left after the interview. But what about the 33 players that do have girlfriends, you ask? Well, even there it seems that the guys might not be getting the cream of the crop when it comes to the women of South Bend. Of the 33 girlfriends, 6 of them have gray hair! And all them seem to have some bizarre skin ailment that gives them light gray skin complexions. “Yeah, well, beggars can’t be choosers,” snorts Horace Coles, a senior defensive end out of Indianapolis. “Although it can be embarrassing to show up at a party in August with a gray-skinned, gray haired woman. I'm only 21, you know.” “It’s a well known fact that the women of Notre Dame aren’t much to blow you nose about,” comments Ayrish Ayes, local sociologist, “but I would have to agree that the guys seem to be getting the bottom of the crop.” Furthermore, closer analysis shows that junior RB Keith Hendrick, junior DT Shane Winslett, and senior TE Kent Banks all claim to have a girlfriend named “Celeste”, and report her hair color as “gray”. Well, it doesn’t take a stats major to tell you that something is a bit dubious here. Talk about sloppy seconds! Furthermore, two guys claim a girlfriend named Emmy with blond hair, two more claim a Nicole with red hair, and two more claim a Nedra, another blond. Wow! Talk about gerbils! These gray-skinned Notre Dame women sure have “light butts”, as they say in the orient. There does appear to be one lucky winner, though. Everyone on the team agrees that senior cornerback R.J. Barker’s woman, Rachel, is the cream of the crop. “She’s a fox!” whoops junior QB Wendell Goodwin. “Yowza!” yodels freshman receiver Dusty Roach. “She’s a cat’s toenail!” gargles senior punter Don Stephens. Rachel’s secret? Green hair, or course. Drives the boys here in South Bend wild. Cool, huh? Never got press like that before. Anyway, back to important matters… Recruiting No new commitments yet, but all of outstanding scholarship offers have drawn visits. Things are heating up in the Rudy Scholarship race this year, as both Finch and Chapman have decided to try to find their ways to South Bend for a visit. All three candidates are now making the trip after nearly two months of thinking. Who will it be? Game Pregame Sigh. 1-5 Connecticut comes to South Bend this week for what will surely be a butchering. What a wimpy schedule we have. I close my eyes to the slaughter… The Result This just gets worse and worse. Notre Dame 59, Connecticut 7. Where to start? We had 662 yards of total offense. Conn had 59. Their one moment of glory came on a kickoff return brought back for a TD. Actually, it could have been worse, but QB Goodwin (23-32, 330 yards, 4 TD’s, 3 int’s) had a spell where he ended three drives by throwing interceptions when deep in Conn territory. It could easily have been 80-7. RB Wolfe had 128 yards and two TD’s on the ground. WR Lonedork caught three TD passes, which gives him 8 on the year. Sigh. Enjoy it while you can guys, it’s not going to last much longer. I will get you yet. Record 6-1. Rank 12 |
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02-27-2003, 07:48 PM
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#44 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 9 Report Cards are in again! Things holding strong. Six players with E’s, and 50+ with low grades in the D’s. We could be looking at a major house cleaning at the end of this year. Let’s have a big “Yeehaw” for illiteracy! WR Lonedork has a bad cold and is listed as probable for 3 weeks. What a man. Recruiting The Rudy Scholarship contest seems to have reached another impasse, as all three recruits have made visits but have yet to make up their minds. Maybe they got lost on the way home. I wonder what to do if more than one of them make up their minds on the same week. Game Pregame 1-5 Navy comes to town this week for slaughter. The next three weeks we will play Navy (#101), South Florida (#107), and Central Florida (#123). Our last game of the year against #22 BC could be a huge one for us, as we may be 9-1 at that point. I am hoping that the weak schedule will keep us out of the BCS, but who knows what could happen if we run the table. Major bowl? BCS? Aaargh! Help me, Mister Wizard! The Result Mr. Wizard doesn't listen either. Navy kept afloat through the first half, as we led only 14-0 at the half. But they sank quickly in the third quarter, when we torpedoed them for 21 unanswered points. Final score 38-3. QB Goodwin (20-34, 231 yards, 3 TD’s, 2 int’s) played well enough. RB Wolfe ran for 147 yards, and got 1 TD on the ground, another in the air. We are just too good. Sounding like a broken record, but the games are playing out much the same way. We rumble, we roar, we roll down and score. Record 7-1. Rank 11. Well, there you have it. It's late again, and my eyes are nodding off. But wow, this is shaping up to be quite a lean year. Have faith, though. We will perservere till the end. Good things will come to us. I just know they will. And if you have digital voodoo skills, be sure to take some time and make a doll of QB Goodwin for us, ok? Can't hurt. |
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02-27-2003, 07:50 PM
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#45 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kekkonen:
Dear Coach Blitz, in this dark hour I would like to direct your attention to a famous prophecy by the well-known French seer Nostradamus. The following verse seems especially relevant: In the century before the last millennium A Great Satan will wake up near the corn fields. On a grass field with white stripes the ravaging beast will be victorious. But the end of the Golden Helm is near when an idiot suits up in the backfield. Sincerely yours, An anonymous member of the Brock "The Savior" Gray Fan Club |
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02-27-2003, 07:50 PM
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#46 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Dear Brock Gray Fan Club Member, Har! Funny funny! Thank you so much for your support in this dark hour! I was not aware of that line from Nostradamus. Weird how Nostradamus is so similar to Notre Dame, isn't it? Sincerely, Godzilla P.S. I hope you are enjoying your 2002 Notre Dame game ball. That one could be a collector's item, as they are quite rare this year. More coming on Wednesday. |
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02-27-2003, 07:51 PM
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#47 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kekkonen:
Dear Sir, I am greatly honored to have this rare Notre Dame game ball. Thank you very much. This puts me on a par with or even above some infamous historical figures. (Studies have shown that Hitler, he only had one ball ... but poor old Goebbels had no balls at all.) Notre Dame and Nostradamus do indeed sound similar. I suspect one is French and one Latin, both meaning "We're widely known but full of sh**." |
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02-27-2003, 07:52 PM
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#48 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Kodos:
I think I speak for a lot of people when I say "WE WANT MORE!!!" Of course, this is interesting coming from the slowest dynasty reporter in the world - moi! Seriously, love the dynasty, can't wait for more! - Kodos |
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02-27-2003, 07:52 PM
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#49 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Kekkonen: Har! Kodos: Sorry for the delay. Hoped it would have been sooner. But although this road is a winding one, we are back. There is work to do. |
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02-27-2003, 07:53 PM
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#50 |
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H.S. Freshman Team
Join Date: Jan 2003
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Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz:
Week 10 Did you all do your homework? Did you see the thrashing Nebraska put on the Dame this evening? Wasn’t that inspirational? Well, I’ll tell you. It thoroughly motivated me to get back to the task at hand. Sorry for the delay! But let’s crank this up again! Recruiting Same same. Everybody frozen in time. Game Off week. |
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