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Old 07-23-2007, 02:47 PM   #301
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I said "relatively attractive" in the sense you don't weigh 400 pounds and fart all over the place.

You have a gentle way with words.
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Old 07-23-2007, 02:47 PM   #302
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Now we know rkmsuf thinks John Oates is hot.


his kiss is on my list?


eh, no. but he isn't an ugly man to say the least.
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Old 07-23-2007, 02:49 PM   #303
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You have a gentle way with words.

ty. I know he's sensitive in this regard.
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Old 07-23-2007, 03:07 PM   #304
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I said "relatively attractive" in the sense you don't weigh 400 pounds and fart all over the place.

So you can be relatively attractive if you just weigh 400 lbs?
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Old 07-23-2007, 03:20 PM   #305
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The man's sexy.
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Old 07-27-2007, 08:38 AM   #306
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You mutha.

So I'm in stall 1 taking a nice, leisurely friday morning dump and this asswhite comes in and goes right in stall 2. Stall 3 and 4 are vacant you turdmuncher!

Ruined a perfectly good dump.

Serenity now.
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Old 07-27-2007, 12:41 PM   #307
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Old 07-27-2007, 12:45 PM   #308
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rkmsuf went kinda bald there.
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Old 07-27-2007, 12:46 PM   #309
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I had my shirt on in the stall though.
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Old 07-27-2007, 12:48 PM   #310
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You know, I find that I like taking my shirt off when doing the business at home. Nowhere else though. I feel more relaxed and comfortable. Also bring in something to read, or my Nintendo DS.
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Old 07-27-2007, 12:49 PM   #311
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Old 08-14-2007, 10:29 AM   #312
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I just saw something odd. Our employee bathroom is out of order, so I had to use the main bathroom where clients can go. I walk in and the stall door is wide open with a guy sitting on the toilet. I know the door locks because I reluctantly had to drop a deuce in there this morning. He has his pants up around his hips and I'm not sure how he isn't going in his pants from the quick glance I took, but he was clearly going from the sounds and smell. I got out of there as quickly as possible.
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Old 08-14-2007, 10:33 AM   #313
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lol. what's odd about that?
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Old 08-14-2007, 10:39 AM   #314
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Originally Posted by Eaglesfan27 View Post
I just saw something odd. Our employee bathroom is out of order, so I had to use the main bathroom where clients can go. I walk in and the stall door is wide open with a guy sitting on the toilet. I know the door locks because I reluctantly had to drop a deuce in there this morning. He has his pants up around his hips and I'm not sure how he isn't going in his pants from the quick glance I took, but he was clearly going from the sounds and smell. I got out of there as quickly as possible.

Yes that's odd.

Maybe he's a public guy and can't go unless the door is open? Or maybe he was just sitting there, and the sounds and smells you witnessed were from another stall?
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Old 08-14-2007, 10:41 AM   #315
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Yes that's odd.

Maybe he's a public guy and can't go unless the door is open? Or maybe he was just sitting there, and the sounds and smells you witnessed were from another stall?


There is only 1 stall and 2 urinals in this bathroom (there is a larger public bathroom upstairs.)
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Old 08-14-2007, 10:43 AM   #316
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There is only 1 stall and 2 urinals in this bathroom (there is a larger public bathroom upstairs.)

I can't explain it then... that's weird. Maybe he was completely hammered and didn't realize what he was doing?

There was an old security video of a public place in the city that captured some scruffy guy (bum, or drunk, I don't know) taking a dump in a potted plant while people walked by...
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Old 08-14-2007, 02:10 PM   #317
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Also bring in something to read, or my Nintendo DS.

I'm guilty of this. I've auto trained myself to read when on the crapper. I spend so much time reading in there now I am afraid to read anywhere else... for fear I'll shit myself.

I work from home now so I don't get any decent public bathroom storires anymore but have a few from when I worked in a datacenter a few years ago. I wokred with a bunch of filthy bastards anyway and was happy to get out of there.

Someone decided to spread poop all over the womens bathroom walls, mirrors and floor right around the time we had layoff notices. We were all called into a meeting and had to go through training on being sanitary which was stupid cause it should have been the women that needed training.

Same job and same bathroom area only thins time it was the mens room a few weeks later. Poop AND blood covering the entire inside of a stall. Another training session a few weeks later on the danger of bloodborne pathogens, blah blah blah. I said screw the training, I wanna know who tried to kill someone in the mens room.
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Old 08-14-2007, 02:14 PM   #318
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I'm guilty of this. I've auto trained myself to read when on the crapper. I spend so much time reading in there now I am afraid to read anywhere else... for fear I'll shit myself.

I work from home now so I don't get any decent public bathroom storires anymore but have a few from when I worked in a datacenter a few years ago. I wokred with a bunch of filthy bastards anyway and was happy to get out of there.

Someone decided to spread poop all over the womens bathroom walls, mirrors and floor right around the time we had layoff notices. We were all called into a meeting and had to go through training on being sanitary which was stupid cause it should have been the women that needed training.

Same job and same bathroom area only thins time it was the mens room a few weeks later. Poop AND blood covering the entire inside of a stall. Another training session a few weeks later on the danger of bloodborne pathogens, blah blah blah. I said screw the training, I wanna know who tried to kill someone in the mens room.

That's so disgusting.

And I find that since I wait until I get to work to do my morning poop now, I read far less and haven't played DS in a few months.
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Old 08-16-2007, 04:45 PM   #319
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Hey so, we discussed in here somewhere how it's weird when someone is talking on their cell phone in the next stall? You don't HAVE to answer your damn phone all the time!
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Old 08-16-2007, 07:43 PM   #320
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I think at the urinal is even worse and I've seen too many people do that lately, too.

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Old 08-28-2007, 02:07 PM   #321
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A question for the FOFC ladies:

Do women's stalls have divider walls that go all the way to the ground?
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Old 08-28-2007, 02:10 PM   #322
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What?

They would suffocate in there!
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Old 08-28-2007, 02:16 PM   #323
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What?

They would suffocate in there!

I'll suffocate you for killing me in my first werewolf game!!
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Old 08-28-2007, 02:18 PM   #324
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I'll suffocate you for killing me in my first werewolf game!!

Werewolves don't use stalls. In fact it's questionable they even go to the bathroom at all. Never seen one pissing or taking a dump.
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Old 08-28-2007, 02:22 PM   #325
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Werewolves don't use stalls. In fact it's questionable they even go to the bathroom at all. Never seen one pissing or taking a dump.

Imagine having to wipe that hairy ass. Poor guys.
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Old 08-28-2007, 02:41 PM   #326
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Hey so, we discussed in here somewhere how it's weird when someone is talking on their cell phone in the next stall? You don't HAVE to answer your damn phone all the time!

One of my absolute favorite ways to be an asshole is to loudly respond to every question the guy in the stall next to me says on his cell. Preferably with profanity. If someone's rude enough to disturb my tranquil moment on the can, I'm certainly rude enough to ruin his phone call.
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Old 08-28-2007, 03:32 PM   #327
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A question for the FOFC ladies:

Do women's stalls have divider walls that go all the way to the ground?

No. I wish they would though. Nothing more annoying than some woman bringing her kids in and having them looking under the stalls.

Also something that weirds me out is the women that bring their 8 year old sons in the bathroom with them. Kid should not be in there at that age. And the boys know it too and look so uncomfortable. You know that's some hyper vigilant neurotic mother and that boy will be traumatized for life.

And yes, women's bathrooms are the worst. Most women are slobs, don't let the boobages fool you.
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Old 08-28-2007, 03:39 PM   #328
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No. I wish they would though. Nothing more annoying than some woman bringing her kids in and having them looking under the stalls.

Also something that weirds me out is the women that bring their 8 year old sons in the bathroom with them. Kid should not be in there at that age. And the boys know it too and look so uncomfortable. You know that's some hyper vigilant neurotic mother and that boy will be traumatized for life.

And yes, women's bathrooms are the worst. Most women are slobs, don't let the boobages fool you.

Hmm, so the woman in that gay soliciting re-enactment video must have never used a stall...

I feel uncomfortable when fathers bring their daughters in the men's washroom too. But I don't think I've seen someone as old as eight.

Men's washrooms in bars/clubs frequently have urine on the floor, and is a reason I don't like going often. Are women's washrooms the same?
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Old 08-28-2007, 03:41 PM   #329
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No. I wish they would though. Nothing more annoying than some woman bringing her kids in and having them looking under the stalls.

Also something that weirds me out is the women that bring their 8 year old sons in the bathroom with them. Kid should not be in there at that age. And the boys know it too and look so uncomfortable. You know that's some hyper vigilant neurotic mother and that boy will be traumatized for life.

And yes, women's bathrooms are the worst. Most women are slobs, don't let the boobages fool you.

A female who reads FOFC and is from Jersey.

So, uhh...you single?

(taps foot)

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Old 08-28-2007, 03:44 PM   #330
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Are you tapping my foot under the stall?

Me haz boyfriend.
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Old 08-28-2007, 03:47 PM   #331
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Hmm, so the woman in that gay soliciting re-enactment video must have never used a stall...

I feel uncomfortable when fathers bring their daughters in the men's washroom too. But I don't think I've seen someone as old as eight.

Men's washrooms in bars/clubs frequently have urine on the floor, and is a reason I don't like going often. Are women's washrooms the same?

In college, the bathrooms in our dorms would be cleaned everyday during the week, but weren't at all on the weekend. So from Friday morning (before everyone woke up hungover, in pain, and hit the bathroom to do one of many things) to Monday morning they were a fucking disaster.

On a random weekend, the girls on my floor were complaining about how gross their bathroom was, which none of us believed because of what we'd seen in ours. Surely they just hadn't experienced the atrocities of a common bathroom shared by 30 guys. So we agreed that we'd walk into theirs to see what they were so grossed out about.

Good God.

There were things going on there that I can't even describe -- things I hadn't seen before. If our bathroom was a 25 on a disgustingness scale of 1-10, this was a perfect-QB-rating-like 158.3.
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Old 08-28-2007, 03:49 PM   #332
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Are you tapping my foot under the stall?

Me haz boyfriend.

Well, if he ever reads this board and learns the techniques to proposition gay sex and gets busted as a result, drop me a PM.
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Old 08-28-2007, 03:52 PM   #333
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A question for the FOFC ladies:

Do women's stalls have divider walls that go all the way to the ground?

The only time I remember seeing one was in Legoland.
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Old 08-28-2007, 04:14 PM   #334
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The only time I remember seeing one was in Legoland.

That's an odd place to have fancy washrooms.
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Old 08-28-2007, 08:10 PM   #335
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Well, if he ever reads this board and learns the techniques to proposition gay sex and gets busted as a result, drop me a PM.

He is a member of the board.
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Old 08-28-2007, 08:24 PM   #336
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Been meaning to add this for awhile...and now since Stalls has risen to the top of the boards again, no reason not too.

There is a guy on my floor--completely another division of the company. No clue on his name, exact job, etc. But there is NO doubt in my mind he's obsessive-compulsive.

He bursts through the bathroom door, and talks to himself the entire he's in there. It's very nerve-racking trying to take a piss when a guy two urinals down (yes, he at least observes the buffer urinal) repeating " OK...OK OK...alright...OK...yeah...uh-uh...OK...yeah....alright...OK OK" the whole time.

Then I've watched as he washes his hands multiple times, and turns on and off off the sink faucets.

What does make me feel better is I think I've got a ways to go to become the oddest person on my floor.
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Old 08-28-2007, 08:29 PM   #337
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He is a member of the board.

If it's Pumpy, I think he'd be down with you giving me a shot.
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Old 08-28-2007, 08:39 PM   #338
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A female who reads FOFC and is from Jersey.

So, uhh...you single?

(taps foot)

LOL. I just spit up my soda.
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Old 08-28-2007, 08:42 PM   #339
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There were things going on there that I can't even describe -- things I hadn't seen before. If our bathroom was a 25 on a disgustingness scale of 1-10, this was a perfect-QB-rating-like 158.3.

I just love the "perfect QB rating" use in this thread

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Old 09-12-2007, 12:03 PM   #340
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Nothing better than one continuous log with a clean break at the end.

Perfecto!
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Old 09-12-2007, 02:25 PM   #341
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?
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Old 09-12-2007, 02:33 PM   #342
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?

I bet that guy is fondling the girl under that blanket.
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Old 09-12-2007, 06:44 PM   #343
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That's a girl?
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Old 09-12-2007, 08:44 PM   #344
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That's a girl?

Come on Suburban don't act like you've never seen anything like that at Kennywood.
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Old 09-12-2007, 08:45 PM   #345
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That's a girl?

The pants look pretty tight... and that hair... oh no, it better be a girl.
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Old 10-02-2007, 04:29 PM   #346
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Ok, I just saw something in the restroom that immediately make me think of this thread.

This guy comes in to wash his coffee mug (I guess some of the suites in this building don't have a sink). He's finishes washing the mug and then proceeds over to the urinal with his coffee mug in hand and starts pissing. He might as well have been pissing right in the mug.
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Old 10-02-2007, 04:36 PM   #347
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There was a group of us at a Chiefs game at Arrowhead years ago. A bunch of us get up at halftime to hit the john. The line is so damn long and the wait is going to be forever. Steve looks at me and then nods towards the sink. Not sure about now but at the time the handwashing facility wasn't really a sink but like a half-moon thing with water always running out of a pipe that followed the half moon (hope that made sense). Anyway old Steve he walks over to the "sink" unzips and starts to piss (keep in mind this long line of men and nobody is at the sinks washing their hands). I would say withing a minute everyone of these halfmoons was surrounded by guys taking a leak. I bet the ushers were wondering how the bathroom cleared out so quickly.

LOL great story.
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Old 10-02-2007, 05:12 PM   #348
M GO BLUE!!!
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I love it when you're in a mens room at a game and a stall opens and some drunk broad comes out all proud that she just used the mens room.
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Old 10-02-2007, 05:36 PM   #349
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LOL great story.

Holy crap. I missed that story before. But I pointed out earlier this year to a friend that the signs over the sink at Kaufman (right next door) say "for hand washing purposes only" or some such nonsense. We had a good little chuckle and speculated why that was probably there. Now it sounds like we were right

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Old 10-19-2007, 12:28 PM   #350
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Well that was something new. Piss on top of the urinal.
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