Depression anyone?

[HomerJSimpson]

All of my life, I have battled bouts of depression. I can remember even back in elementary school going through periods of severe hoplessness, but especially in highschool-young adulthood (with a handfull of sucide attempts to boot). I finally did get some help for it a few years ago, but was quickly disillusioned with the state of modern mental health care. A counsellor suggested I go to the MD and get Prozac. All I did was say "I want Prozac" the doctor wrote the prescription. It helped for a short while, but before long the periods of depression returned. I then went to a psychiatrist and said "I think I may be borderline maniac-depressive" and low and behold, she diagnosed me as a border-line manic-depressive and put me on Lithium, and when that didn't seem to work, Depakote.

After I had a near fatal car accident (which I believe was due to the distracted state I was in while on Depakote), I wean myself off the mediciation (which I don't recommend, but it didn't kill me). That has been over 5 years ago, and I haven't really had another major bout of depression.

Until now.

What kills me about these depressive periods is the fact I can tell they are coming, know that I need to not do things that will make them worse, but then lack the will/ability to not to do things that make them worse (if that makes sense). I know what triggered this, but instead of just dealing with that, I create even more problems in my life until I feel like I'm drowning in problems with no way out.

I'm mature enough now (I guess that is what it is) to know that this will pass, the problems will sort themselves out, and there is no reason to give up. I just wish these cycles would end. The older I get, the more I feel the affect of this on my health (like now my blood-pressure is too high, and I'm showing definite warning signs of blood-sugar problems). Without insurance, there is not much I can do about it, and with the depression I don't have the energy to do what needs to be done (diet, exercise) that is in my control. It just takes too much of my energy to appear normal to direct energy to the things I should.


Anyway, enough crying like a girl. Just thought I'd vent some of this somewhere.

[Anthony]

cowboy up, son.

[ice4277]

Hey man, I know how you feel, I have had that through parts of my life as well. It hit its peak during my first couple years in college. At this point it rarely happens, but it still sucks when it does. The only advice I can give is fight through it. If in fact your blood pressure is high, you need to kick your own ass to help it out. For that matter, diet and exercise very well could help with the depression, also, so it could be doubly helpful.

[sovereignstar]

I'll take a raincheck on sharing a mass amount of my experiences with depression on a Saturday afternoon, but I definitely hear you on the modern health care part.

What you need are some of these brand, spanking new samples we just received. Have them, they're free!

[HomerJSimpson]

Originally Posted by Hell Atlantic

cowboy up, son.

Thanks, Dr. Nick.

[JonInMiddleGA]

You've identified one of the worst parts of battling this, the tendency for it to spiral.
And the only way out, as you already know, is to break the spiral, just level off long enough to begin to battle back.

Adequate rest (which is nigh on impossible to get during these, or else you sleep 20 hrs a day) does seem to help, if only by limiting the amount of hours you have to do things that will speed the descent. Heck, I've found p.c. or tabletop gaming can help, by providing a distraction & limiting those chances to make things worse. (of course, having the attention span to do them is the challenge there).

I wish you luck, I know the hell you're talking about.

[Karim]

Originally Posted by Hell Atlantic

cowboy up, son.

Fuck you.


HomerJSimpson,

If it is possible with finances and your circumstances, you really owe it to yourself to find a good counsellor. I've found that we all have a general idea of the problems and when we reach a certain age, we think we are old enough to handle it. Until it is resolved though, it can come back to haunt you. Medication never worked for me.

Hang in there.

[JonInMiddleGA]

What Karim said, all the way through.

[Suicane75]

Seeing a counselor or a therapist is indeed a good idea. Sometimes just talking, saying things out loud to someone helps alot more than you would suspect.

[gottimd]

HomerJ-
Have you confided in close friends to let them know your situation? The reason I ask is that I think it is really important to have a strong support system as well as get self help. A fraternity brother of mine, who has had bouts of depression in the past, somewhat similar to yours, recently lost his wife. They just got married 8 months ago, and she passed away at the age of 27 from a Brain Aneurysm. He, obviously at this point, is in a very deep depression now, and many people are standing by him and watching him and supporting him at all times to make sure he doesn't do any harm to himself.

I just think it helps a tremendous amount to be able to talk to a close friend or family member and even a therapist to help you get through this. I know its easier said than done, and I can't imagine what you are going through, but just being able to talk about it and let others know your feelings can truly help.

[Anthony]

Originally Posted by Karim

Fuck you.

WHAT? what's wrong with "cowboy up"? this is a text sim website, what fucking pearls of wisdom does he think he's gonna get. i told him to get back up and soldier on, or do you not know what cowboy up means? i wish your mother was pro-choice.

[Flasch186]

Not to thread jack but to those without a way to understand, like me:

How does this happen? IS it chemical? What are the warning signs that a bout is coming on? Why can one not recognize the problem, and battle it AND win? Why does this happen to some and not others?

I truly don't understand but want to...Why is it so?

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by Flasch186

Not to thread jack but to those without a way to understand, like me:

How does this happen? IS it chemical? What are the warning signs that a bout is coming on? Why can one not recognize the problem, and battle it AND win? Why does this happen to some and not others?

I truly don't understand but want to...Why is it so?

Chemical imbalances are believed to cause some, but not all, of the various forms of depression. Other forms may also be chemically-related and simply haven't had the connection discovered yet. Others still are related to various brain abnormalities, "misfiring" neurons & such.

Warning signs vary both by individual & type of depression; i.e. those who suffer from depression vs manic depression have different signs. Irritability, listlessness, confusion, concentration problems, insomnia, all of those & probably 100 more are symptomatic.

Recognition is hampered by factors ranging from denial to societal pressure to misinformed medical advice (both professional & amateur) to others I'm just typing too quickly to mention.

Battling it and defeating it are subject to the same factors that hinder recognition plus a lack of adequate medical understanding of the subject to the inability to find a one-size-fits-all treatment or cure. Hell, I'm not sure that anyone who has suffered from any of the various forms have ever been "cured", only controlled. I liken it to being an alcoholic, in the sense of the familiar phrase "once an alcoholic, always an alcholic, no matter how long its been since you've had a drink". Depression can be a lot like that, it's a 500 pound gorilla in the corner of your mental room, one that you pray stays dormant but could wake up at any moment.

Why to some and not others? If you can find an answer to that one Flasch, you'll be a very rich motherfucker.

[st.cronin]

Find yourself a counsellor type who specializes in 'cognitive psychology.'

[st.cronin]

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

Chemical imbalances are believed to cause some, but not all, of the various forms of depression. Other forms may also be chemically-related and simply haven't had the connection discovered yet. Others still are related to various brain abnormalities, "misfiring" neurons & such.

Warning signs vary both by individual & type of depression; i.e. those who suffer from depression vs manic depression have different signs. Irritability, listlessness, confusion, concentration problems, insomnia, all of those & probably 100 more are symptomatic.

Recognition is hampered by factors ranging from denial to societal pressure to misinformed medical advice (both professional & amateur) to others I'm just typing too quickly to mention.

Battling it and defeating it are subject to the same factors that hinder recognition plus a lack of adequate medical understanding of the subject to the inability to find a one-size-fits-all treatment or cure. Hell, I'm not sure that anyone who has suffered from any of the various forms have ever been "cured", only controlled. I liken it to being an alcoholic, in the sense of the familiar phrase "once an alcoholic, always an alcholic, no matter how long its been since you've had a drink". Depression can be a lot like that, it's a 500 pound gorilla in the corner of your mental room, one that you pray stays dormant but could wake up at any moment.

Why to some and not others? If you can find an answer to that one Flasch, you'll be a very rich motherfucker.

Excellent summary.

[Eaglesfan27]

I agree with everything Jon just said in response to Flasch.

Homer, just like any profession, there are bad psychiatrists and good psychiatrists. I urge you to give the professional mental health system another chance. If your finances are tight, I'd recommend going to the nearest good medical school with a psychiatry residency to see one of their residents if possible. Also, therapy plus medication works much better than either alone. Find a good counselor if at all possible. You might want to check with your local chapter of NAMI to see if they can help you find good professional help. Please feel free to PM me if you want to ask any specific questions.

[gottimd]

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

Why to some and not others? If you can find an answer to that one Flasch, you'll be a very rich motherfucker.

Because I said so.....is that good enough? It was for my parents when I was younger. Now start sending me money.

[Arles]

My mom's a child psychologist and she's seen a lot of these situations from the onset at a young age. Depression is tough thing to deal with. The best description she's heard is it's like being an alcoholic but not being able to see or control when you drink. The best thing that has worked with kids (from what she has said) is distractions. Games, hobbies, music, sports and other similar activities tend to minimize the valleys a bit (which is a big thing - from what I understand). Outside of that, I agree with others that say to find a good counselor, if only to have someone to talk to about so it's not all kept in.

Also, IMO, threads like these are one of the best uses of message board communities. I would think that HJS seeing there are others that can relate to his situation and give some tidbits on ideas is a positive. My advice would be to not try to do it all alone. Depression is a serious issue and not something that you should try and lick on your own anymore than a serious drug or alcohol addiction is. The worst part of depression is that your actions may not stop these onsets so you really need to have a good support staff. I certainly wish you the best and encourage you to keep this forum involved if similar episodes reoccur.

[HomerJSimpson]

Originally Posted by Arles

Also, IMO, threads like these are one of the best uses of message board communities.

Agreed, but I really didn't mind HA's post. I expected it from some one. Just laugh it off or ignore it.


Thanks for the words everyone (especially Jon). I really don't have the money to see anyone for help right now (part of the problem), but I'll see what I can find.

[HomerJSimpson]

Originally Posted by Eaglesfan27

I agree with everything Jon just said in response to Flasch.

Homer, just like any profession, there are bad psychiatrists and good psychiatrists. I urge you to give the professional mental health system another chance. If your finances are tight, I'd recommend going to the nearest good medical school with a psychiatry residency to see one of their residents if possible. Also, therapy plus medication works much better than either alone. Find a good counselor if at all possible. You might want to check with your local chapter of NAMI to see if they can help you find good professional help. Please feel free to PM me if you want to ask any specific questions.

Don't think I'm throwing the whole profession under the bus. I just think that our current mental health system is not really set up very well. It is very "helter skelter" in the way it treats patience, with too many people un-qualified treating people (ie. MD's), and too many quacks that are still practicing. I'm actually taking a psychology class right now, and the main thing I've taken away from the class is that psychology has a long way to go. At best, it is good at finding symptoms, and not very good at finding causes. That doesn't mean the system can't help, or should stop trying, but it is far from being very adequate.

[DaddyTorgo]

i too have had my bouts with depression, from elementary school, where I would self-depricate for attention through high school where it was primarily manifested as isolating myself from the social scene. Been on and off meds, primarily Prozac, and have been in counseling for the last ohh...9 years? I find that medication definately takes the "edge" off, both the high and the low, leaving me somewhat more anchored in the middle, but I'll go through bouts where I despise myself for having to take it, and try to wean myself off of it. Havn't had a real major depressive episode in the last couple years fortunately. I was once clinically diagnosed as "mildly clinically depressed" so I am by no means a very depressed person, but I know how bad it can get at times. Nice idea for a thread, if at least so we can all do a little bit of reaching out if we feels ourselves slipping down, and maybe the community here can take care of its own.

[Eaglesfan27]

Originally Posted by HomerJSimpson

Don't think I'm throwing the whole profession under the bus. I just think that our current mental health system is not really set up very well. It is very "helter skelter" in the way it treats patience, with too many people un-qualified treating people (ie. MD's), and too many quacks that are still practicing. I'm actually taking a psychology class right now, and the main thing I've taken away from the class is that psychology has a long way to go. At best, it is good at finding symptoms, and not very good at finding causes. That doesn't mean the system can't help, or should stop trying, but it is far from being very adequate.

I agree that the system is inadequate in many ways. One of the only reasons that I attend political dinners, and serve on committees is because I want to see mental health parity legislation passed. It is a major issue that has been ignored or put on the backburner for far too long. I understand the health care system in general is facing a major economical crisis, however, I strongly believe we as a nation need mental health parity legislation.

Good luck with your situation.

[NoMyths]

Originally Posted by Eaglesfan27

I agree that the system is inadequate in many ways. One of the only reasons that I attend political dinners, and serve on committees is because I want to see mental health parity legislation passed. It is a major issue that has been ignored or put on the backburner for far too long. I understand the health care system in general is facing a major economical crisis, however, I strongly believe we as a nation need mental health parity legislation.

Good luck with your situation.

What is "mental health parity legislation"?

[HomerJSimpson]

Originally Posted by gottimd

HomerJ-
Have you confided in close friends to let them know your situation? The reason I ask is that I think it is really important to have a strong support system as well as get self help. A fraternity brother of mine, who has had bouts of depression in the past, somewhat similar to yours, recently lost his wife. They just got married 8 months ago, and she passed away at the age of 27 from a Brain Aneurysm. He, obviously at this point, is in a very deep depression now, and many people are standing by him and watching him and supporting him at all times to make sure he doesn't do any harm to himself.

I just think it helps a tremendous amount to be able to talk to a close friend or family member and even a therapist to help you get through this. I know its easier said than done, and I can't imagine what you are going through, but just being able to talk about it and let others know your feelings can truly help.

I have several close friends, but no one that I can relate my whole self to. Each friend knows me in different aspects of my life, and there are always some parts I can't expose to them for various reasons (I know this is vague, but I really can't explain). My wife knows me best, but she is too close, and doesn't handle my "weaknesses" very well. Probably the only friend I have that I can be the most "real" with is not someone who would be helpfull (he is more like HA).

[mhass]

Homer,

My wife suffered for quite a while before we were married and it sounds awful. She has several theories on why the 'mean reds' (Breakfast at Tiffany's?) as she calls them don't come around any more, but most of them have to do with filling her life with things she considers meaningful and lasting (raising our children, church, getting an MBA, babysitting my stupid ass, etc.) I am completely unqualified to answer your questions and provide any help, but I felt the same pain I saw in her when I read your post. I'm also not advising you to do any of the things that helped her, but there may very well be something out there that can consume you so that these low spots won't.

[Eaglesfan27]

Originally Posted by NoMyths

What is "mental health parity legislation"?

Right now, both private and public sources underfund mental health care in comparision to other areas of medicine. For example, most private insurance companies will offer significantly fewer benefits for psychaitric care as opposed to other areas of medicine. As an example, even good insurance companies limit people to essentially 5 or 10 days of inpatient psychiatric care per year, and some place a lifetime limit of 30 days or some such number. Others only reimburse 50% of mental health care costs, and pass the other 50% onto the consumer. Others say you can only go see your outpatient psychiatrist 3 or 4 times a year.

This disparity is the major reason that I don't work for a private hospital, and that I choose to work in state run clinics. At least there, I can treat people fairly (even though our state run clinics are vastly underfunded and therefore we can't offer all of the services that I would like to see us offer.) Psychiatry is the only area that insurance companies have such disparity. Psychiatrists such as myself and other medical doctors have been fighting the legislature to pass Mental Health Parity Legislation to ensure that this isn't done by private health insurance companies, and also that state budgets offer more equitable coverage of psychiatric issues.

[Fonzie]

Originally Posted by Eaglesfan27

Right now, both private and public sources underfund mental health care in comparision to other areas of medicine. For example, most private insurance companies will offer significantly fewer benefits for psychaitric care as opposed to other areas of medicine. As an example, even good insurance companies limit people to essentially 5 or 10 days of inpatient psychiatric care per year, and some place a lifetime limit of 30 days or some such number. Others only reimburse 50% of mental health care costs, and pass the other 50% onto the consumer. Others say you can only go see your outpatient psychiatrist 3 or 4 times a year.

This disparity is the major reason that I don't work for a private hospital, and that I choose to work in state run clinics. At least there, I can treat people fairly (even though our state run clinics are vastly underfunded and therefore we can't offer all of the services that I would like to see us offer.) Psychiatry is the only area that insurance companies have such disparity. Psychiatrists such as myself and other medical doctors have been fighting the legislature to pass Mental Health Parity Legislation to ensure that this isn't done by private health insurance companies, and also that state budgets offer more equitable coverage of psychiatric issues.

Word. It is astonishing that this discrepancy continues to exist - and that our society allows it to continue to exist.

And HJS - I'd follow Eaglesfan27's advice and try to find a local medical school or other provider who has sliding scale (based on income) fees. They can help to reduce the costs a great deal.

I'd also like to point out, on behalf of the mental health profession (I'm a psychologist), that while we do have a long way to go in understanding the entirety of mental illness, we do actually undestand a great deal of it and have effective treatments (behavioral, pharamcological, and conjoint therapies) for many, many disorders. Don't give up hope - odds are that you can find someone who can help you.

Hang in there HJS, and best of luck to you.

[Anthony]

Originally Posted by HomerJSimpson

Agreed, but I really didn't mind HA's post.

what the fuck are you talking about? do you know what the phrase "cowboy up" even means? tried to offer some small positive words, that's all, you want a shoulder to cry on go get some friends.

nevermind, forget i even posted here, i could care less if you're depressed and can't bear to stand the worthlessness your life has become.

[Anthony]

Originally Posted by HomerJSimpson

Probably the only friend I have that I can be the most "real" with is not someone who would be helpfull (he is more like HA).

get hit by a car

[NAIWF]

Originally Posted by Flasch186

Not to thread jack but to those without a way to understand, like me:

How does this happen? IS it chemical? What are the warning signs that a bout is coming on? Why can one not recognize the problem, and battle it AND win? Why does this happen to some and not others?

I truly don't understand but want to...Why is it so?

I would say that in my personal experiences, I know something's coming based on my sleep cycles. As a somewhat hardcore insomniac at times, I know that when I absolutely cannot fall asleep for hours each night over a period of days at a time, there's often going to be some difficult times at hand. It's not just a matter of crankiness or being fatigued, because I don't feel like things are setting me off or that I'm moving at less than full speed mentally or physically, but I do tend to lose my focus for long periods of time, which never happens normally. It can be seen in something as simple as carrying on a conversation where I will lose my train of thought in midsentence, and struggle so much to remember what I was talking about that people think I'm playing a joke on them.

These issues never happen when I'm in a "good state", and I tend to find that my brain works much harder/faster when I'm feeling depressed, which causes more problems in and of itself. The worst part is that I often won't know something is "wrong" until I find myself knee deep in the situation, ie I could have no sleep problems for months, and then suddenly it's 5 AM and I'm still trying to go to bed every night for a week. I know that stress often makes the matter worse, but as recently as today, I don't feel stressed at all, but I can't sleep and I've ended up having arguments with my best friend and my mother over why I'm not getting any rest. It's not like I'm refusing sleep here, but they don't have any answers, which leads me to my last point.

The majority of my friends can't really help in these scenarios aside from listening to me vent for 10-15 minutes. I absolutely refuse to take drugs, and talking to counselors througout high school and college only exacerbated the situation because they seemed to ignore my anti-drug stance. I don't see how telling someone, "here, take these drugs even though you don't want to" is fixing a problem. To me that would be like telling an alcoholic that the best way to get over his alcohol addiction is to replace it with a heroin habit.

[Eaglesfan27]

Originally Posted by Hell Atlantic

get hit by a car

You are such an asshat sometimes.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by NAIWF

... and I tend to find that my brain works much harder/faster when I'm feeling depressed, which causes more problems in and of itself.

This really jumped off the page at me, and I'm the world's worst at amateur diagnosis, but I can't help it because this phrase really rang a bell.

That's about as close to describing "agitated depression" as anything I've ever seen. You're depressed but you're also running a mile a minute in your head.
Also known as "mixed mania" one description says A person experiencing mixed mania may feel agitated, angry, irritable, and depressed all at once.
If that isn't what you're describing, then my reading skills have really gone downhill.

I'm not the least bit "anti-drug" when it comes to arresting problems such as depression, so you're welcome to dismiss my advice or comments if you want, but ...

I don't see how telling someone, "here, take these drugs even though you don't want to" is fixing a problem.

That's a fix, or at least a stopgap measure, because sometimes it's the only known way to subdue the symptoms. It isn't perfect by any measure, but if it's the only way to arrest the problem, at least long enough to explore other means, I believe strongly that it's worthwhile. And sometimes, like it or not, there aren't any other methods known to work.

I wish you luck and improvement with the situation.

[daedalus]

HJS,

On what little I know of depression, I can't imagine it has been easy to deal with. Good job being strong so far and good luck with continuing to deal with it, man.

PM or IM me or something, if you feel like you need someone to yap with or vent to. I'm around at odd hours, though.

[st.cronin]

Originally Posted by HomerJSimpson

Don't think I'm throwing the whole profession under the bus. I just think that our current mental health system is not really set up very well. It is very "helter skelter" in the way it treats patience, with too many people un-qualified treating people (ie. MD's), and too many quacks that are still practicing. I'm actually taking a psychology class right now, and the main thing I've taken away from the class is that psychology has a long way to go. At best, it is good at finding symptoms, and not very good at finding causes. That doesn't mean the system can't help, or should stop trying, but it is far from being very adequate.

This is why I suggested he seek out somebody who practices 'cognitive psychology.' It's really the only methodology that produces verifiable results.

[Flasch186]

perhaps talking about it on here (somewhat anonymously) is a good way to examine and at least sort the issues in your head. PErhaps even slowing things down since you can only see one thread at a time. I dont know....I only know that when Im awake my brain goes a mile a minute but at the end of the night, bedtime, it shuts down and i wake up and do it again. This is so much so that I cannot take naps at all, my brain is moving too fasdt and when i close my eyes, during a nap, my eyes move around rapidly behind my eyeball preventing any sort of relaxation. Anyways, anytime in my life when things seem bad, like really bad...(and to be honest its been awhile - which Ill describe below) I just try to say to myself...."no one is going to die...so it really isn't that bad." Now i guess, while writing this im seeing that this might not work when death is imminent, perhaps, for a family member dealing with sickness or such so perhaps Ill need to be careful but I think you see the point....


So, how did I make my life so easy:

1. Try hard to never tell a lie.

Its harder than you think. Situations come up all of the time in which you would truly find life easier, at the moment, to tell a lie BUT many more times it is much worse IF the lie is caught. SO, I try to never tell a lie. This is so habit forming and obsessive that sometimes its wierd. Three days ago I told a tiny lie, I said That my GF wasn't home yet because if she had left work on time (and not early) she shouldn't have been home for another 10 minutes, but she was already home. After telling the lie to Keith, BF, he said that he just saw her drove up to our house...and then I had to explain that I thought Kevn, our boss (her boss) was in the car with him because we were all going to dinner together. So even though it was miniscule, it still leaves a resounding scar when I tell a fib, so its become truly quite easy to avoid telling them. The hardest part is when you say something to someone that is honest but they dont'didnt want to hear honesty. that takes some serious work.

2. Do the things you enjoy/make time for yourself

I love playing basketball. GF wants to go bikeriding at the beach on Wednesday nights. I go play pickup basketball Wednesaday nights...Its a non-issue basketball it is. If I ever skip basketball to go riding she'll be happy as shit that I gave her that BUT the key is that Im going to do what I love as long as it doesnt hurt anyone..

3. Try to be nice to everyone.

That one is extremely hard. There is a guy I work with, well he works in another enighborhood around the bend and he comes over to hang out at our model all the time and he annoys the shit out of me. He is a Talker, talkey talkey talkey, NO MORE TALKEY!! Anyways, it becomes quite irritating BUT I still try.

4. Save your money/buy what you want

There is a happy medium there and outside of this is to have investments but you have to treat yourself sometimes. my 61" TV (Ladder 49 looked awesome on it) is a treat. Not necessary but a treat. I work hard (sometimes at least stress wise) so treats are important BUT if you spend your money unwisely than eventually you'll struggle and have to get rid of your treats. you just have to look out and prepare for the future.


im sure theyre more but these jumped to mind.

[digamma]

Originally Posted by Karim

HomerJSimpson,

If it is possible with finances and your circumstances, you really owe it to yourself to find a good counsellor. I've found that we all have a general idea of the problems and when we reach a certain age, we think we are old enough to handle it. Until it is resolved though, it can come back to haunt you. Medication never worked for me.

Hang in there.

I'd go a step further and say, make sure you can afford it. The correlation (causation aside) between depression and financial trouble is quite high.

[Solecismic]

Originally Posted by Arles

My mom's a child psychologist and she's seen a lot of these situations from the onset at a young age. Depression is tough thing to deal with. The best description she's heard is it's like being an alcoholic but not being able to see or control when you drink. The best thing that has worked with kids (from what she has said) is distractions. Games, hobbies, music, sports and other similar activities tend to minimize the valleys a bit (which is a big thing - from what I understand). Outside of that, I agree with others that say to find a good counselor, if only to have someone to talk to about so it's not all kept in.

Also, IMO, threads like these are one of the best uses of message board communities. I would think that HJS seeing there are others that can relate to his situation and give some tidbits on ideas is a positive. My advice would be to not try to do it all alone. Depression is a serious issue and not something that you should try and lick on your own anymore than a serious drug or alcohol addiction is. The worst part of depression is that your actions may not stop these onsets so you really need to have a good support staff. I certainly wish you the best and encourage you to keep this forum involved if similar episodes reoccur.

That's a remarkable coincidence, Arlie. My mom was in child psych as well, and that's what my little sister does for a living.

I don't have a tremendous amount to add here for Homer, but one point jumped out at me in your description. You mentioned that it often feels like a blood sugar problem.

While this is not something to be taken lightly, and going to professionals is well worth the time and effort, one piece of advice I'd try is to have many smaller meals during the day.

Eating is often something that makes us feel good, for many reasons. So much of our brain evolved as a mechanism for regulating nutrient intake. Feeling bad might well be a sign that your brain is telling you it needs some nutrient.

[HomerJSimpson]

Originally Posted by Solecismic

That's a remarkable coincidence, Arlie. My mom was in child psych as well, and that's what my little sister does for a living.

I don't have a tremendous amount to add here for Homer, but one point jumped out at me in your description. You mentioned that it often feels like a blood sugar problem.

While this is not something to be taken lightly, and going to professionals is well worth the time and effort, one piece of advice I'd try is to have many smaller meals during the day.

Eating is often something that makes us feel good, for many reasons. So much of our brain evolved as a mechanism for regulating nutrient intake. Feeling bad might well be a sign that your brain is telling you it needs some nutrient.

Good point. It is hard to do when in this cycle, though, because I spend about half the time not wanting anything to eat, then when I eat I don't want to stop. It is possible that this adds to the cycle itself. It really is a "chicken or the egg" thing, as it is hard to say which one causes the other. I think though the depression causes the bad eating habits, and then the bad eating habits exaserbates the depression.

This reminds me of what Jon was talking about with brain chemicals. I know that depression is tied to brain chemicals, but I don't think that brain chemicals are the only root cause. I think that depression is caused by the two overriding factors of life, genetics and environment. I think most chronic depressives have both the genetic disposition to be susceptible to brain chemical problems, and environmental factors creates the stressors for those problems. It is not 100% either environment or genetic, it is a combination of both.

That is why I'm very carefull with my children. I know they have a genetic predisposition for these problems, so I do everything I can to make their homelife as stable as possible, and reassure them regularly of the fact they are loved and have value. That is like a complete 180 from how I was raised, and hopefully they will grow up with a better ability to cope. We have dealt with tough times (some of which were caused by my problems), but I don't think my daughter has ever felt afraid to come home. She has always had a safe place.

[Ben E Lou]

Originally Posted by HomerJSimpson

Good point. It is hard to do when in this cycle, though, because I spend about half the time not wanting anything to eat, then when I eat I don't want to stop. It is possible that this adds to the cycle itself. It really is a "chicken or the egg" thing, as it is hard to say which one causes the other. I think though the depression causes the bad eating habits, and then the bad eating habits exaserbates the depression.

This reminds me of what Jon was talking about with brain chemicals. I know that depression is tied to brain chemicals, but I don't think that brain chemicals are the only root cause. I think that depression is caused by the two overriding factors of life, genetics and environment. I think most chronic depressives have both the genetic disposition to be susceptible to brain chemical problems, and environmental factors creates the stressors for those problems. It is not 100% either environment or genetic, it is a combination of both.

That is why I'm very carefull with my children. I know they have a genetic predisposition for these problems, so I do everything I can to make their homelife as stable as possible, and reassure them regularly of the fact they are loved and have value. That is like a complete 180 from how I was raised, and hopefully they will grow up with a better ability to cope. We have dealt with tough times (some of which were caused by my problems), but I don't think my daughter has ever felt afraid to come home. She has always had a safe place.

You may not realize it now, but you're in a very good place, my friend. I've dealt with enough people with depression to know that there's not really anything I can say to make it go away. My prayer (and I have lifted them up more than once today for this) is that you'd be secure in the knowledge that this, too, shall pass.

[st.cronin]

Originally Posted by SkyDog

You may not realize it now, but you're in a very good place, my friend. I've dealt with enough people with depression to know that there's not really anything I can say to make it go away. My prayer (and I have lifted them up more than once today for this) is that you'd be secure in the knowledge that this, too, shall pass.

Amen to this. Whenever I reflect upon the very worst times in my life, I always realize that the wisdom and clarity gained was in fact worth all the shit.

[MIJB#19]

Had I never gotten severely depressed, I'd probably never had spent a couple of years on building up my interest in sports stats, which worked out into finding this place about a game called FOF and eventually joining that great thing called IHOF. And being part of that has been a great thing so far. (What do you mean with it being sad to be addicted to writing about a fake football league?)

Bottom line, it helped me to settle with the thought that the bad things in life have a meaning and may eventually lead to good things, that wouldn't have happened otherwise.

[OldGiants]

Just some random things I've learned/read about depression that help me in dark moments and have helped my cousin, too:

A psychologist once told me that being depressed is a sure sign that you are of above average intelligence because stupid people don't have the intelligence to understand what could go wrong. so take pride in your superior intellect.

IMO, Winston Churchill was the greatest man of the 20th century and he suffered from depression, often to the point of it rendering him unable to function. He decided to call his depression "that old black dog" and somewhat cured himself by telling the dog to go away when he felt its presence.

Also, make plans for the weekend. If you can envision yourself enjoying the weekend, then the depression will pass.

[Anthony]

HJS extended an olive branch to me via PM, so i'm gonna step out of character for a second to formally apologize for the negative things i said. i didn't know cowboy up had negative connotations when i wrote, i only knew it as the Red Sox' rallying cry during their march to the WS, so i thought it was just a positive, uplifting thing to say to someone when they're down. in any event, Hell Atlantic isn't about kicking people while they're down, so we'll chalk this one up as a case of misunderstanding.

for the record, i diagnosed myself with having a mild form of Depression when i was in college. i say "mild" because i think teens have a tendency of being all melancholic and negative (the very demographic that music groups like Staind cater to), so i'm not sure what i felt was akin to Depression or if i was just going through some teenage doldrums. i say "mild" because i've since "cured" myself, or at least no longer have any trace of the negativity that clouded me.

now, enough of me giving HJS a fucking hand job, back to your regularly scheduled programming.

[Fonzie]

Nicely done, HA.

[Ben E Lou]

Originally Posted by Fonzie

Nicely done, HA.

Word.

[HomerJSimpson]

Thank you. As I said, I wish my post hadn't prompted all of that. And though the hand job was nice, your hairy man-boobs do nothing for me.

[vtbub]

Hang in there, you certainly are not alone.

[stevew]

Whatever happened to Homer? I'm kind of guessing that it was another poster using an alias for awhile, but if not, its just odd that someone puts together 2000 posts in 9 months, and then just quits cold turkey. Anyways.

[JeeberDMack]

Been inactive for a month and a month now...

[GrantDawg]

I shot him. He kept eating my sandwiches.