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Old 08-14-2008, 12:24 PM   #1
saldana
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apparently sex is an olympic sport

i know we have an olympics thread, but I thought this was too funny not to have its own

Quote:
Originally Posted by usatoday.com
Safe sex promoted in Olympic Village


There are a lot of things athletes may run out of at the Olympic Village in Beijing but condoms should not be one of them.
Organizers have supplied 100,000 for the 10,500 athletes housed in the village. Organizers have handed out condoms at every Olympics since 1992 in Barcelona to raise awareness of AIDS prevention.
At Sydney, the 70,000 condoms supplied, ran out and officials ordered an additional 20,000 more.
"There are many young, strong, single people in the athletes' village and, like everywhere, some will fall in love or other things, so we need to make condoms available," Ole Hansen, spokesman for UNAIDS China, told Reuters. "A lot of these young people are not married or in relationships so we want to make sure they have the information and tools to protect themselves if they have sexual encounters."
So not to offend any athlete, the condoms are not put in rooms but are available at medical sights and at the athlete's center.
Elasun, a condom maker in China, has been runningfunny ads showing Olympic stickman performing alongside condoms shaped like bicycles, basketball hoop and net and an archery target.

so everyone gets 10 condoms to use in 16 days!

in sydney, everyone got 7, and it wasnt enough!

how the hell do these people have enough energy to run/jump/swim or whatever when all they appear to do is nail each other

i am gonna be laughing about this for quite a while.


Last edited by saldana : 08-14-2008 at 12:25 PM.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:26 PM   #2
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Originally Posted by saldana View Post
how the hell do these people have enough energy to run/jump/swim or whatever when all they appear to do is nail each other

Don't most of the athletes stick around for the rest of the Games after their event(s) are completed? I bet the distribution curve is heavily weighted toward the end of the competition.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:28 PM   #3
albionmoonlight
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I can totally see it. Lots of totally hot people from around the world all living in the same area. And totally commitment free, too. It's not like that fencer from Japan is ever going to have to have an awkward party meeting with that pole vaulter from France.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:28 PM   #4
saldana
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Don't most of the athletes stick around for the rest of the Games after their event(s) are completed? I bet the distribution curve is heavily weighted toward the end of the competition.
fair enough, but if you deduct the number of people that are married as not needing any, then the average available goes up to probably about 12 or 14 per person.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:29 PM   #5
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I think my favorite part was "some will fall in love or other things."
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:31 PM   #6
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Awesome. After one of the races, Phelps said he's just going to go back to his room and sleep for the rest of the afternoon. More like sleep around! Hi oh!
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:31 PM   #7
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A buddy of mine took photographs at the Turin winter games. His memorable quote was, "Bode Miller may have choked in his skiing events, but he definitely got the gold for boffing chicks."
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:31 PM   #8
Noop
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I would be scoping out all of the European women personally and maybe some South American. Oh and can't forget the Japanese hmm you know what as long as they were a 7 and didn't want a commitment I would do it. Then again I am a man-whore.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:32 PM   #9
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Meaning all of the women.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:33 PM   #10
molson
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Great, now I'm going to spend the rest of the day speculating about sex pairings.

Hopefully they're keeping Kobe Bryant away from the Chinese gymnasts.

Last edited by molson : 08-14-2008 at 12:33 PM.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:33 PM   #11
Fidatelo
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If Michael Phelps can train 5 hours a day I'm certain that he can muster the energy to bang a few beach volleyball players in between his 2 or 3 races each day
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:37 PM   #12
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Young, strong, attractive athletes in the prime of their lives. Yep, I can definitely see this.

Last edited by clemsonfan : 08-14-2008 at 12:37 PM.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:42 PM   #13
MikeVic
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http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/...terstitialskip

Behind the times Salt Lake City!

I'm curious about pairings too. Is it a case now of two athletes just bumping into each other and just going at it? Or do you think one sees another on TV or at an event, and writes a note for the room the athlete is staying at?

I wonder how much gay/lesbian sex takes place too?

Last edited by MikeVic : 08-14-2008 at 12:43 PM.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:50 PM   #14
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They train with teammates for weeks, so I bet a lot of the pairings are between teammates.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:50 PM   #15
Lathum
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I bet alot of people grab handfulls to take home with them.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:51 PM   #16
saldana
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I bet alot of people grab handfulls to take home with them.
the link about salt lake actually says that is what happens to alot of them
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:55 PM   #17
Fidatelo
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Canada should institute a rule that you can only have sex in the Village if you achieve a personal best in one or more of your events. Maybe that would get us some medals.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:55 PM   #18
MikeVic
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So maybe this isn't a big orgy as we first thought.
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Old 08-14-2008, 12:55 PM   #19
MikeVic
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Originally Posted by Fidatelo View Post
Canada should institute a rule that you can only have sex in the Village if you achieve a personal best in one or more of your events. Maybe that would get us some medals.

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Old 08-14-2008, 01:03 PM   #20
saldana
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So maybe this isn't a big orgy as we first thought.

actually, either way it is pretty funny.....

we either have 8,000 or so world class athletes running around banging each other

or

we have 200 or so world class athletes going through the x-ray machine at the airport with 500 condoms in their suitcase
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:07 PM   #21
MikeVic
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I wonder what kind of condoms?
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:07 PM   #22
Lathum
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to be honest, I dont find it all that funny
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:07 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by Fidatelo View Post
Canada should institute a rule that you can only have sex in the Village if you achieve a personal best in one or more of your events. Maybe that would get us some medals.

many of the canadian swimmers did achieve their personal bests at the games, they simply were not as good as other swimmers...

FM
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:08 PM   #24
bbor
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That would'nt last Pumpy a week.
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Now that I've cracked and made that admission, I wonder if I'm only a couple of steps away from wanting to tongue-kiss Jaromir Jagr and give Bobby Clarke a blowjob.
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:12 PM   #25
digamma
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So maybe this isn't a big orgy as we first thought.

Make no mistake, the Olympics are a huge freaking party.
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:15 PM   #26
MikeVic
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many of the canadian swimmers did achieve their personal bests at the games, they simply were not as good as other swimmers...

FM

With the new suits, I would hope every swimmer achieved a personal best.
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:16 PM   #27
MikeVic
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Hopefully they're keeping Kobe Bryant away from the Chinese gymnasts.

This is a good line.
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:20 PM   #28
Fidatelo
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many of the canadian swimmers did achieve their personal bests at the games, they simply were not as good as other swimmers...

FM

That's fine, if we're going to send them knowing that even at their best they likely can't compete, that's on us. It's the ones that stink it up that shouldn't get the sex. We could have a motto: Get stinky on the stage or in your room, but you can't do both. :P
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:32 PM   #29
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If sex is an Olympic sport...i just got a gold medal in the shot put last night.
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:41 PM   #30
Noop
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If sex is an Olympic sport...i just got a gold medal in the shot put last night.

I have a couple fake imaginary girlfriends I can lend you.
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:42 PM   #31
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to be honest, I dont find it all that funny
Orgies are serious business!
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Old 08-14-2008, 01:43 PM   #32
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I have a couple fake imaginary girlfriends I can lend you.

Sure...I am always shooting to improve my accuracy.
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Old 08-14-2008, 02:30 PM   #33
Bad-example
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So, which county has the most pulled groins thus far?
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Old 08-14-2008, 02:52 PM   #34
Klinglerware
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With the new suits, I would hope every swimmer achieved a personal best.

For a second there, I thought you were making a condom joke.
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Old 08-14-2008, 04:07 PM   #35
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USATODAY.com - sights? Um guys it's sites...
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Old 08-14-2008, 04:14 PM   #36
molson
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USATODAY.com - sights? Um guys it's sites...

They've now changed it in the article to say "medical centres". (not USATODAY, Reuters article on Canada.com)

It seems like the online article just goes up as a draft these days. I once came across an ESPN.com article that actually had the editor's comments still on there. Words were crossed, out, there were random question marks where the author wasn't clear - I wish I took a screenshot.
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Old 08-14-2008, 04:21 PM   #37
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fair enough, but if you deduct the number of people that are married as not needing any, then the average available goes up to probably about 12 or 14 per person.

Since when does being married = not needing any?
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Old 08-14-2008, 06:39 PM   #38
saldana
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Since when does being married = not needing any?

i was making the assumption that say, Misty May-Treanor, whose husband does not appear to be in Beijing, wouldnt be using her share.
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Old 08-14-2008, 07:06 PM   #39
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i was making the assumption that say, Misty May-Treanor, whose husband does not appear to be in Beijing, wouldnt be using her share.

I don't know, have you seen the penis on her? There's a reason her name is Misty.
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Old 08-14-2008, 07:08 PM   #40
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If sex is an Olympic sport...i just got a gold medal in the shot put last night.

Diddy's a gold medalist ... in bed
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Old 08-14-2008, 07:16 PM   #41
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i was making the assumption that say, Misty May-Treanor, whose husband does not appear to be in Beijing, wouldnt be using her share.

actualy I think her husband is their coach.
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Old 08-14-2008, 07:31 PM   #42
saldana
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actualy I think her husband is their coach.
her husband is the backup catcher for the marlins
ESPN - Matt Treanor Stats, News, Photos - Florida Marlins
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Old 08-14-2008, 07:32 PM   #43
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actualy I think her husband is their coach.

Talented dude, that Matt Treanor.
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Old 08-14-2008, 07:33 PM   #44
saldana
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Talented dude, that Matt Treanor.

i agree...it is quite a feat to go 1 for 3 against the mets on Sunday at the same time he is at the olympics using his wife's 10 condoms
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Old 08-14-2008, 07:34 PM   #45
saldana
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I don't know, have you seen the penis on her? There's a reason her name is Misty.

speaking of seeing the penis...did anyone else catch what appeared to be Jonathan Horton pitching a tent after the pommel horse last night?
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Old 08-14-2008, 07:38 PM   #46
Lathum
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hmmm, I could have sworn they showed him in the stands last night. I obviously was mistaken
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Old 08-14-2008, 09:06 PM   #47
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speaking of seeing the penis...did anyone else catch what appeared to be Jonathan Horton pitching a tent after the pommel horse last night?

If there ever was a post that should have totally killed a thread...
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Old 08-14-2008, 09:13 PM   #48
MikeVic
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I did not watch last night, so I did not see said penis.
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Old 08-14-2008, 09:15 PM   #49
saldana
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I did not watch last night, so I did not see said penis.
try to envision Madonna's cone bra inside gynastic tights
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Old 08-14-2008, 09:28 PM   #50
MikeVic
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Damn.
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