IWS #174 RESULTS: Stupid Runs an NFL Franchise (Producers-Style)

PurdueBrad · 03-11-2010, 06:58 AM

Let's find out who gets the first pick in the draft, as Stupid attempts to destroy an NFL franchise...

1- Which NFL franchise does Stupid want to run into the ground?
Cowboys 28
Patriots 9
Lions 3
Raiders 3
Redskins 1
Vikings 1
Colts 1

**Do the Lions, Raiders, and Redskins really need any help here? Although I was happy to see nobody answer the Steelers (although Big Ben might be doing a good job of that on his own).

2- The first opportunity for the implosion of Stupid's team is with the team's #1 pick. So which quarterback in the upcoming draft will be the biggest bust (and of course is also the QB that Stupid drafts)?

Tim Tebow 34
Jimmy Clausen 9
Colt McCoy 2
Sam Bradford 1

**While I enjoyed the Clausen answers greatly, the fact that Tim Tebow apparently can't throw has won a lot of you over.

3- Now that Stupid has made his mark, time to hand it off to the front office staff. Who does Stupid hire to be General Manager to further wreck this ship?

Matt Millen 36
Al Davis 6
Isiah Thomas 2
Jerry Angelo 1
Charley Casserly 1

**I really loved those of you that reached out to other sports, nicely done. Looks like Stupid wants to draft a bunch of wide receivers.

4- Stupid and GM have successfully destroyed the roster. So what current college head coach will Stupid hire to run the team into the ground?

Lane Kiffin 14
Steve Spurrier 10
Nick Saban 5
Ty Willingham 3
Bobby Petrino 3
Les Miles 2
Urban Meyer 2
Rich Rodriguez 2
Greg Robinson 2
Randy Shannon 1
Charlie Weis 1
Ron Zook 1

**This is the first of the three game-breaking questions. Kiffin is a terrific answer but I did, personally, enjoy the Willingham and Weis answers.

5- Finally, Stupid needs to get people to stop coming to the stadium. Who does Stupid recruit as halftime entertainment?

The Who 12
Britney Spears 4
Ashlee Simpson 4
Miley Cyrus 3
Elton John 3
Billy Joel 3
Janet Jackson 2
Carrot Top 2
Rolling Stones 2
Adam Lambert 1
Jonas Brothers 1
Roseanne Barr 1
Donny and Marie 1
Mike Vick's Fighting Dogs 1
Kathy Griffin 1
Barry Manilow 1
Cher 1
Larry King 1
Village People 1
Nobody 1

**This was a huge one for deciding our winner. The Who took a drubbing, especially when the next three are female pop stars. Oh, how The Who have fallen.

6- At the end of a championship season, a team celebrates with champagne. What will Stupid's team celebrate with after this dismal year?

Beer 16 (condensed all beer answers here)
Champagne 7 (condensed all champagne answers here)
Water 5
Mad Dog 20-20 2
Kool Aid 2
Trout 2
Shirley Temple 1
Pink Slips 1
Milk 1
Going 0-16 1
Tar and feathers 1
Cosmos 1
Wine coolers 1
The blood of Matt Millen 1
Cocaine 1
Mike's Hard Lemonade 1
Sparkling Apple Juice 1
Whiskey 1

**This was all over the board but I made the executive decision to count all the numerous answers of types of beer into just beer, same with champagne. The same person emerged victorious it turns out but it seemed like the right move. Mad Dog 20-20 is clearly the right answer though, nicely done both of you.

So, when all is said and done, Stupid is going to run the Cowboys into the ground with Tim Tebow at the helm, Matt Millen drafting wide receivers from the front office while Lane Kiffin coaches them all. At half-time, fans will be 'treated' to a performance by The Who. And the Cowboys will celebrate their massive failure with beer, particularly cheap beer.

Accidentally went 16-0
JBergey22 672
MIJB#19 6048
Tasan 6480

Went 12-4 and made the playoffs
Desnudo 10368
Bisbo 10368
CoffeeWarlord 11016
Dodger Chick 29376
SteveMax58 33048
RaidersArmy 34272
PackerFanatic 45696
Racer 66096
Flere-imsaho 68544
Doug5984 68544
DenialofFreedom 90720

Went 8-8
Klinglerware 239904
Wheels 285600
DarkCloud 319872
Mustang 342720
Celeval 373184
GeneralMike 470016
Karlifornia 508032
MikeVic 514080
Pyser 635040
KWhit 685440
DanGarion 762048
Chesapeake 771120
SuburbanRhythm 913920

4-12, not too bad, but not bad enough
SilverOwl 1057536
Chubby 1175040
Dutch 1439424
Tigercat 1524096
Airhog 1586304
SteveW 2799360
Masked 4112640
Lungs 4354560
Eaglefan 7050240
RPI-Fan 7197120
Vince, Pt. II 7197120
StLee 9253440

3-13, not quite there but a high draft pick
Abe Sargent 10281600

2-14, getting closer to the that top spot
Panerd 11515392
Albionmoonlight 19740672

1-15, close to as stupid as Stupid can be
Nilodor 30707712
Sublime2 30707712
Hammer 755 30707712 (that's what you get for insulting the San Diego Surf, second place!)

AND, WITH THE FIRST PICK IN THE DRAFT AFTER A COMPLETELY PERFECT IMPERFECT SEASON AT 0-16...
Hoopsguy 92123136 (all number 1 answers)

Congrats Hoops and thanks a ton guys for participating, it was fun reading your answers.

albionmoonlight · 03-11-2010, 07:32 AM

Good contest

Vince, Pt. II · 03-11-2010, 08:07 AM

Yeah, I really enjoyed the questions even if a few were slam-dunk answers.

jbergey22 · 03-11-2010, 09:41 AM

I cant say I am real surprised with stupids answers except Tim Tebow.

A bust? I wouldnt call a 3rd-4th round selection with limited upside as a QB a "biggest bust". I'd just call it bad drafting.

Well done PB and congrats to Hoopsguy.

Mustang · 03-11-2010, 09:47 AM

And thanks to PurdueBrad for making that one of the quickest IWS in a long time.

PurdueBrad · 03-11-2010, 09:48 AM

My personal answers would have been:

Patriots
Jimmy Clausen (rooting for it, sorry)
Matt Millen
Steve Spurrier
Prince
Boone's Farm

PurdueBrad · 03-11-2010, 09:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mustang

And thanks to PurdueBrad for making that one of the quickest IWS in a long time.

I hope nobody minded. I was excited about doing it so, like a kid at Christmas, was quite excited.

albionmoonlight · 03-11-2010, 09:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PurdueBrad

I hope nobody minded. I was excited about doing it so, like a kid at Christmas, was quite excited.

No, Quick is good. Fast turnover means more IWS momentum.

Toddzilla · 03-11-2010, 09:53 AM

i waffled about entering, and I'm glad I didn't as I would have whiffed completely on 3 answers. oof

Doug5984 · 03-11-2010, 10:18 AM

Do I get bonus points for being one of the two with Mad Dog 20-20?

Pumpy Tudors · 03-11-2010, 10:23 AM

There are some hilarious answers in here. LLLLLOOOOVVVEE IT!

claphamsa · 03-11-2010, 10:44 AM

I cant believe only one person picked the redskins... WTF people!

flere-imsaho · 03-11-2010, 11:18 AM

Great one. I actually had trouble with question three until the idea of Matt Millen hit me upside the head.

Mustang · 03-11-2010, 11:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by claphamsa

I cant believe only one person picked the redskins... WTF people!

I think Danny boy is doing a fine job right now of doing that.

MikeVic · 03-11-2010, 11:28 AM

I enjoyed this one.

sterlingice · 03-11-2010, 11:28 AM

I love "Isiah Thomas", "Mike Vick's Fighting Dogs", and, yes, "Mad Dog 20-20"

I think "The Who" got an unfair shake here just because they were the halftime show for this year's Super Bowl.

SI

DanGarion · 03-11-2010, 11:33 AM

Not just Koolaid, but Jim Jones Koolaid!

MIJB#19 · 03-11-2010, 11:42 AM

Alright, 3 #1 answers and still manged to be 2nd worst. That's old school.

stevew · 03-11-2010, 12:00 PM

My GM answer was "Kevin McHale" for a few moments until I remembered Millen.

PurdueBrad · 03-11-2010, 12:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DanGarion

Not just Koolaid, but Jim Jones Koolaid!

Hehe, yeah, I lumped you in with Kool Aid but that was one of the answers I laughed out loud at.

MIJB#19 · 03-11-2010, 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MIJB#19

Alright, 3 #1 answers and still manged to be 2nd worst. That's old school.

Oh wait, I didn't have 3 #1's, I made a last minute change from The Who to Billy Joel... (Also can't believe I missed on Tim Tebow and choked on the 6th question.)

Karlifornia · 03-11-2010, 03:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sterlingice

I love "Isiah Thomas", "Mike Vick's Fighting Dogs", and, yes, "Mad Dog 20-20"

I think "The Who" got an unfair shake here just because they were the halftime show for this year's Super Bowl.

SI

I agree with all of this...especially "Michael Vick's Fighting Dogs". I literally LOL'ed

Vince, Pt. II · 03-11-2010, 06:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by flere-imsaho

Great one. I actually had trouble with question three until the idea of Matt Millen hit me upside the head.

Yeah. That was the first one I had trouble with, and then it just struck me. Duh!

Sun Tzu · 03-11-2010, 06:48 PM

The Who, that's classic.

SteveMax58 · 03-11-2010, 06:57 PM

Great job PB...I had a blast with this one.

Bisbo · 03-11-2010, 07:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by claphamsa

I cant believe only one person picked the redskins... WTF people!

That was me. I thought the contest was set up specfically to honor Dan Snyder.

Dodgerchick · 03-11-2010, 08:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PurdueBrad

Hehe, yeah, I lumped you in with Kool Aid but that was one of the answers I laughed out loud at.

I liked "Matt Millen's Blood".. haha

Thanks for running this PurdueBrad and grats hoops!

PackerFanatic · 03-11-2010, 09:07 PM

Matt Millen and the Cowboys. Duh. Al Davis was the first guy to pop into my head, and as a Packer fan, the Vikings are the first team that come to mind when I think of "inept" (Cowboys are a close second though)

Great job, PB (and Hoops!)

EagleFan · 03-11-2010, 10:02 PM

Crud, went with the Lions for number one. Figured they were already run into the ground by stupid and would go well with the Matt Millen answer. Though I like the answer of Cowboys so much better.

stevew · 03-11-2010, 10:57 PM

I think cowboys is the default "team we hate" answer.

I think I misread the qb question. I thought it said "THE number one pick" and not a mere first rounder.

SteveMax58 · 03-12-2010, 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevew

I think cowboys is the default "team we hate" answer.

While I (as a Giants fan) hate the Cowboys...I guess I didn't realize that was a popular team to hate. I went Patriots.

hoopsguy · 03-12-2010, 10:47 PM

I'm clearly in tune with stupid, having won the last two I've entered

Thanks for a fun group of questions, PB. I'll look to get the next one posted by early next week.

Abe Sargent · 04-08-2010, 09:23 AM

Bump?

hoopsguy · 04-08-2010, 06:30 PM

Thanks for bump - I had lost track of this. I'll get it up this weekend.

Pyser · 04-08-2010, 07:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hoopsguy

Thanks for bump - I had lost track of this. I'll get it up this weekend.

thats what...she said?

03-11-2010, 09:41 AM	#4
jbergey22 Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Minnesota	I cant say I am real surprised with stupids answers except Tim Tebow. A bust? I wouldnt call a 3rd-4th round selection with limited upside as a QB a "biggest bust". I'd just call it bad drafting. Well done PB and congrats to Hoopsguy. Last edited by jbergey22 : 03-11-2010 at 09:42 AM.

03-11-2010, 09:47 AM	#5
Mustang Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Wisconsin	And thanks to PurdueBrad for making that one of the quickest IWS in a long time. __________________ You, you will regret what you have done this day. I will make you regret ever being born. Your going to wish you never left your mothers womb, where it was warm and safe... and wet. i am going to show you pain you never knew existed, you are going to see a whole new spectrum of pain, like a Rainboooow. But! This rainbow is not just like any other rainbow, its...

03-11-2010, 10:23 AM	#11
Pumpy Tudors Bounty Hunter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Pittsburgh, PA	There are some hilarious answers in here. LLLLLOOOOVVVEE IT! __________________ No, I am not Batman, and I will not repair your food processor.

03-11-2010, 10:44 AM	#12
claphamsa Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: non white trash MD	I cant believe only one person picked the redskins... WTF people! __________________ Dominating Warewolf for 0 games! GIT R DUN!!!

03-11-2010, 11:28 AM	#16
sterlingice Hall Of Famer Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Back in Houston!	I love "Isiah Thomas", "Mike Vick's Fighting Dogs", and, yes, "Mad Dog 20-20" I think "The Who" got an unfair shake here just because they were the halftime show for this year's Super Bowl. SI __________________ Houston Hippopotami, III.3: 20th Anniversary Thread - All former HT players are encouraged to check it out! Janos: "Only America could produce an imbecile of your caliber!" Freakazoid: "That's because we make lots of things better than other people!"

03-11-2010, 07:32 AM	#2
albionmoonlight Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: North Carolina	Good contest

03-11-2010, 08:07 AM	#3
Vince, Pt. II Pro Starter Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: Somewhere More Familiar	Yeah, I really enjoyed the questions even if a few were slam-dunk answers.

03-11-2010, 09:48 AM	#6
PurdueBrad Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: DeKalb, IL	My personal answers would have been: Patriots Jimmy Clausen (rooting for it, sorry) Matt Millen Steve Spurrier Prince Boone's Farm

03-11-2010, 09:53 AM	#9
Toddzilla Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Burke, VA	i waffled about entering, and I'm glad I didn't as I would have whiffed completely on 3 answers. oof

03-11-2010, 10:18 AM	#10
Doug5984 College Benchwarmer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Louisiana	Do I get bonus points for being one of the two with Mad Dog 20-20?

03-11-2010, 11:18 AM	#13
flere-imsaho Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Chicagoland	Great one. I actually had trouble with question three until the idea of Matt Millen hit me upside the head.

03-11-2010, 11:28 AM	#15
MikeVic Head Coach Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Hometown of Canada	I enjoyed this one.

03-11-2010, 11:33 AM	#17
DanGarion Coordinator Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: The Great Northwest	Not just Koolaid, but Jim Jones Koolaid! __________________ Los Angeles Dodgers Check out the FOFC Groups on Facebook! and Reddit! DON'T REPORT ME BRO!

03-11-2010, 11:42 AM	#18
MIJB#19 Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Maassluis, Zuid-Holland, Netherlands	Alright, 3 #1 answers and still manged to be 2nd worst. That's old school. __________________ * 2005 Golden Scribe winner for best FOF Dynasty about IHOF's Maassluis Merchantmen * Former GM of GEFL's Houston Oilers and WOOF's Curacao Cocktail

03-11-2010, 12:00 PM	#19
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	My GM answer was "Kevin McHale" for a few moments until I remembered Millen.

03-11-2010, 06:48 PM	#24
Sun Tzu Pro Starter Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: In the thick of it.	The Who, that's classic. __________________ I'm still here. Don't touch my fucking bacon.

03-11-2010, 06:57 PM	#25
SteveMax58 College Starter Join Date: Dec 2006	Great job PB...I had a blast with this one. Last edited by SteveMax58 : 03-11-2010 at 06:58 PM. Reason: ~

03-11-2010, 09:07 PM	#28
PackerFanatic Pro Starter Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Appleton, WI	Matt Millen and the Cowboys. Duh. Al Davis was the first guy to pop into my head, and as a Packer fan, the Vikings are the first team that come to mind when I think of "inept" (Cowboys are a close second though) Great job, PB (and Hoops!) __________________ Commissioner of the RNFL

03-11-2010, 10:02 PM	#29
EagleFan Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Mays Landing, NJ USA	Crud, went with the Lions for number one. Figured they were already run into the ground by stupid and would go well with the Matt Millen answer. Though I like the answer of Cowboys so much better.

03-11-2010, 10:57 PM	#30
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	I think cowboys is the default "team we hate" answer. I think I misread the qb question. I thought it said "THE number one pick" and not a mere first rounder.

03-12-2010, 10:47 PM	#32
hoopsguy General Manager Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Chicago	I'm clearly in tune with stupid, having won the last two I've entered Thanks for a fun group of questions, PB. I'll look to get the next one posted by early next week.

04-08-2010, 09:23 AM	#33
Abe Sargent Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: Catonsville, MD	Bump? __________________ Check out my two current weekly Magic columns! https://www.coolstuffinc.com/a/?action=search&page=1&author[]=Abe%20Sargent

04-08-2010, 06:30 PM	#34
hoopsguy General Manager Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Chicago	Thanks for bump - I had lost track of this. I'll get it up this weekend.

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