OT: Harry Potter word replacement

[terpkristin]

I am a good little girl....this guy is bad.
Copied from http://www.bash.org/?111338


Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book
Let's see the results...

"Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
"Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything

A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.

"Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
"Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "

Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls

"Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"

The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.

He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.

He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

Ok
I have found, definitive proof
that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all
"Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
O_______O
Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang

Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.

'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.

[Franklinnoble]

Great... I'm going to have an embarassing damp spot in my crotch for the rest of the day because I've just pissed myself laughing.

[rkmsuf]

That is classic

[JeeberD]

Funny stuff, even more so since I'm currently trying to reread the series before the new movie comes out...


And speaking of Harry Potter, how about Lindsay Lohan as Hermione on SNL? Wow...

Oh, and here's a link to the skit for my fellow pervs...

fxxp://public1.ftp.mugglenet.com:9000/snl/snl_may2004_wmv.zip

Be sure to change the fxxp to ftp...

[Passacaglia]

Isn't that just a letter replacement?

[Mantle2600]

That was some great stuff, especially since i just got done playing with my wang..er... I mean wand. Ya, thats it, wand

[Maple Leafs]

This sounds like a potential FOFC game: find a post by someone, and change one letter in one word to give it a new meaning.

[sterlingice]

Despite being very outspoken about how most nethumor sucks, most of the stuff on Bash is pretty damn funny (at least stuff with decent vote counts).

SI

[sabotai]

bash.org is such a great site.