USPW: TEW for people who just dont understand

[kislingbury]

OOC: New format going to be followed here. Molson does the industry/breakdown/status thing so well no-one else can compete, so I’ll be following a different creed. Fingers crossed

In case that doesnt make sense, this is a continuation of my old thread, Molson inspires...

As usual feedback is welcome and advice desirable!

USPW Wrestling

Week 2 March 2008
Venue Alabamala Coliseum
Attendance 2,950

We begin the show with Sam Strong in the ring.

“It’s come to my attention that some of our fans have been making noise about this company recently. My company. Some so-called fans have been saying that we’ve lost our way. That we don’t know what we’re doing.”
Sam looks furious
“I got two things to say to that. First: I’ll admit that our action may have slipped a bit as we settle into our new style. And second: It all changes here. Tonight you’re going to see some of the world’s biggest men, some world-class athletes, some extraordinary people and some of the most committed entertainers to ever grace the ring… All beating the living hell out of each other!
“In fact, it’s all going to start right here with our first match. A relative newcomer to USPW, and one of the baddest asses around madman Boone will take on someone who’s like a son to me, and whom I think can be just as good in the ring as I ever was… Nicky Champion.”


(B+)


Nicky Champion vs. Madman Boone
This starts out as a wild brawl, but Nicky manages to bring some control to it, as Madman starts to wear down with his repeated all-out assaults. Unfortunately, it can’t last against this type of brute and after a series of vicious punches, Boone hits his Bone and Bust slam for the pin.


(D+)


We see the door to the ladies changing room open and Alicia Strong emerges looking ready for action. She stops suddenly confronted by the current tag-team champs, the Towers of Power, Mick Muscles and Danny Rushmore. They are accompanied by their manager Sheik Mustafa.
Sheik “Ah, the young pretender. Where I com from it is not seemly that woman wants to fight men. A woman should be at home not in men’s business”
Alicia “Where you come from they don’t have women like me. That and you’re a sexist pig. Just cos of your attitude, me and Joss are going to ask for a match with your boys. And daddy will make sure I get it”
Sheik “I don’t think so. This is what happens to girls who should have kept their mouth shut”
With that Muscles and Rushmore proceed to attack Alicia. She has no chance against the two huge guys, and is soon crumpled on the floor. The Towers and the Sheik stroll off laughing.


(D+)

James Justice is seen with his mother in the library backstage (?). James is clearly trying hard to study, but Helen Justice is intent on haranguing him
Helen “And then there was the time you didn’t do that homework in 9^th grade. You’ve been such a disappointment!”
JJ “C’mon Mum. I’ve got this big test coming up, and I really need to study non-deliverant activational clauses, and then I’ve got to represent this new guy Sam’s got in…”
Helen “Maybe if you’d thought of that beforehand rather than spent your time with those bums that you call friends, you wouldn’t be so hard-pushed now.”
A knock on the door is hard and a figure (dressed in wrestling trunks and boots) comes into view. JJ rises and offers his hand
JJ “Ah, Mr Holmes isn’t it? Bryan Holmes?”
Bryan “Whatever booknerd. I’ve signed with USPW, but Sam says I need to go through an audit before I can fight”
Helen “That’s how a gentleman should behave James. Respect for his career”
JJ “Indeed Mr Holmes, looking through my notes, it appears you have had a series of, ah, unfortunate incident over the years. Assault, battery, extortion, affray…”
Bryan “Can it 4-eyes. Sign my form or shut the hell up. You need your unit passed as much as I need to rumble”
JJ grudgingly signs the form but looks somewhat reluctant. As he does lace w:st="on">Bryanlace> snatches it back.
Bryan “Thanks loser. And guess what? My first match is tonight. With you”


(C+)


The Hillbillies vs. Jacob Jett & Roderick Remus
As usual Remus is looking exhausted what with keeping up with Jett’s hectic party lifestyle, but even so they’ve got the jump on the Hillbillies who have little or no ability apart from being large and strong. Jett is working moves, counters and literally running rings around the Hillbillies when a huge shape comes sprinting down the apron. It’s Giant Redwood coming for the Hillbillies. As h enters the ring, Jett & Remus strategically exit and Redwood proceeds to clear house before rummaging through the Hillbillies’ dungaree pockets. Frustrated at finding no bottle, he roars at the downed men and crowd before stalking off. The match of course was ruled a no-contest.


(E)


Sam comes to the announcing desk to confer with main announcer Danny Jillevski. Danny “I’ve just been informed that there has been another match announced for next week’s PPV “Freedom Fight”. The Hillbillies will be given the chance to take on Giant Redwood in a handicap match.
Sam “Damn straight. And listen up Redwood! I’ll say this in words you understand. No. More. Smashing. Things. Up. The Hillbillies get their chance at you in a fair fight. Well fair-ish, is it will also be a hardcore match. Good luck animal.”>>


(E+)

Sam “In fact whilst I’m at it, I’ve added another match for Freedom Fight. I’m giving Nicky Champion another chance at the National Championship belt against Anger.
But after he let me down earlier tonight, that boy owes me a performance, so it will be a triple threat match with T-Rex thrown in. The message is Nicky: Try harder.”


(A)


As Sam goes to make his way back stage again, Joss Thompson’s music starts to play and he comes out.
Joss “Sam, it’s about time I formally introduced myself to you. I’m the guy that loves your daughter”
Sam “I know damn well who you are son. And I’m watching you very carefully. Now, what do you want?”
Joss “I can’t believe you don’t even know. This very evening, your daughter has been left bleeding on the floor, and you’re out here talking about the freaking Hillbillies”
Sam “Well hold on a moment there son. I know what’s happened and I’ve sent her my regards, but when she came into this business, she asked me very clearly to treat her just the same as anyone else. “
Joss “I don’t care what she said! I want a shot against those bums that 2-on-1’ed her and I want it tonight! Boss”
Sam “You know, I’m not so good at following orders. Especially from employees, but I like you son. You remind me of me. You got your shot tonight. The Towers of Power vs. you and a partner of your choice in a hardcore match. And by the way, that was the last time you tell me to do anything. Son”


(D+)


Leadbelly vs. Burning Exile
Exile comes down to the ring very low key (apart from his mask of course) whilst Leadbelly is all arrogance and rock’n’roll. The match begins in a similar vein, with Exile unwilling to lock up with the bigger man. The two trade blows and eventually some impressive impact moves. The crowd seem a little non-plussed (clearly they’re not used to seeing two guys who can actually wrestle) but gasp at a few moments including a top rope splash from Exile and a series of German suplexes from ‘belly. Leadbelly’s skill comes to bear though and he forces Exile to submit.


(E+)


Sam is again seen backstage.
Sam “Well everybody, the card is really shaping up for Freedom Fight. I’ve decided that everybody starts to tow my line then, so I’m making another match. Enough of his messing about, I’m saying right here in the Alabama Coliseum, that Bruce the Giant will be defending his USPW title in a fair fight, one on one to the finish. And I know everybody and his wife is gunning for that belt, so it’s going to be Bruce the Giant vs. a challenger of my choosing for the USPW title in a Steel Cage!”


(B)


James Justice (with his mum) vs. Bryan Holmes
Holmes of course is making his debut and gets very little from the crowd. Justice is fired up and on his game and using his full arsenal of moves. The match surges back and forth, but is in fact quite technical as Justice attempts to pin Holmes down. However, Holms is a tough customer in the ring even if he doesn’t look like a superstar and slithers away. Holmes hits a big backbreaker and Justice looks done. He kicks out on 2 and summons enough energy for a big whip into a Liberation Slam. 1,2,3 and it’s a win for JJ.


(C)


Joss Thompson is backstage leaning into an open locker room door. We can’t see who is inside.
Joss “So it’s settled? You’ll be my partner tonight as I make the Towers of Power pay for attacking my girl?”
“Yeah me too. I’m so up for this one”
“OK, but make sure you keep an eye on that stone-age Sheik. See you in the ring”
He walks off clearly ready for a fight and we see his partner emerge. Its ex-champ and friend-to-the-underdog Freddie Datsun!

(A)

Joss Thompson & Freddie Datsun vs. the Towers of Power (with Sheik Mustafa)
Joss is like a man possessed tonight and absolutely flies into the Towers. He and Freddie have brought baseball bats down and try to get in some big hits, but the Towers are armed themselves and give as good as they get. The Sheik also is a factor as he loops a clothesline about Joss’ neck at one point only for Freddie to make the save. The Towers power is impressive, but ultimately, Joss’ passion tonight shows and he lines up Mick Muscles for the Clean Cutter. Game over for the Towers.


(E+)

Show rating (D-)

[kislingbury]

Sam calls me up the day after


Sam “To be honest Son, I’m not that happy. I thought you told me that last night was the start of a new era? That USPW was going to turn itself around?”


Me “Well to be honest, I think it was a new start. No-one had to sit through some of the awful wrestlers we generally use like Bruce the Giant, Pete Valentine or Kim Force, and even Giant Redwood was only on fleetingly. JJ and the new boy Bryan Holmes put on a pretty good match.”


Sam “OK, but still, our headlining match sucked, Madman/Champion sucked and Leadbelly/Exile sucked”


Me “well the headlining match was bad I’ll admit, but Joss and Freddie had zero chemistry and tagteam matches are always hard. Those guys on their own will definitely gain pace, you wait. Madman/Champion was surprisingly bad, but it was the opener and Leadbelly/Exile was a midcard filler. Those are talented fighters, but the crowd don’t know them yet. Our roster is getting better all the time; we just need to gain some momentum”


Sam “Speaking of the roster, ECW are sniffing around. They’ve offered contracts to Des Davids and Nicky Champion”

Me “Des can go, he’s a chump. Nicky would be a problem, but he’s loyal to you and he’s a long-term project anyway. I think he’ll stay”


Sam “Talk all you want son. I’ve got my eye on you and I’m expecting change. For the better”


The old guy’s got a nerve. Employ a roster full of 7 footers who are fat, old and untalented and it will take time to turnaround. Once the public get into Joss/Alicia and our new guys get a bit of heat, it’ll be a different world. But I really hope Nicky Champion doesn’t walk out on us…

[EdReedIsGod]

Those emoticons have forced me to end my life.

[Flasch186]

new format = bad

[PilotMan]

I hate it when that happens. Try and disable the smilies.

[kislingbury]

sorry chaps. Didnt realise it had done it

[kislingbury]

USPW TV
Week 2 April 2008
Alabama Coliseum
2,000 attendees (sold out)
Dark match
James Justice vs. Jacob Jett
This is a pretty technical match and the two really click together. JJ vs. JJ is a nice hook too. Justice shows why he’s a big name by busting out some big slams and pins Jett.


(C)


Davis Wayne Newton vs. Cherry Bomb
The girl uses her very muscular build to show her great strength, and although DWN is a top athlete, his reluctance to hit a girl proves his undoing. Cherry wins

(D-)


Main Show


Sam comes to the ring with a mic to start the show.
Sam “After some soul-searching, last week I gave Joss the match he wanted against the Towers of Power even though they’re bigger, stronger and meaner than any normal man. Joss took care of business though, and maybe he is worthy of her affections… However, I’m saying again that no one tells me what to do and every single employee will end up towing my line one way or another.
Elsewhere, things are shaping up for Freedom Fight in a few days time, and it looks like some scores will b settled. More on that later. Good luck to everyone there.
Except the Towers. If you touch my little girl again, Joss’ beatdown of you will be a happy memory,”


(A)


Backstage Alicia is seen entering the arena with a heavy black eye. Pete Valentine sidles up in his monogrammed velvet dressing gown. As a friend of her father’s, Pete is a good couple of decades older than her.
Pete V “That’s a sight for sore eyes. The talent level round here has definitely just got better”
Alicia “Hi Uncle Pete. Look, I need to go see Joss. Can we catch up later?”
Pete V “Why don’t you ditch that guy and spend some time with a guy with a little more… experience?”
Alicia “Are you hitting on me?”
Pete V “You grew up with me, no-one knows you better”
Alicia “Ugh. That’s gross! You really are a dirty old man.”
Alicia walks off, but we pan sideways to see Joss. He’s seen the whole thing.


(C+)


USPW debutant UK Dragon vs. Madman Boone
Dragon looks full of ambition and energy and even hits a top-rope back flip, but Madman gets angrier and angrier and eventually snaps. Boom. Boone and Bust. Dragon goes down.


(D)


Alicia is seen again heading towards Sam’s office. Out of nowhere, the Towers attack with Sheik Mustafa. Just as it looks like she will get another bating, Joss arrives to save the day. He can’t beat all 3 of them alone, but he does enough to let Alicia get away.

(E+)


T-Rex vs. Burning Exile
It was always going to be a classic case of little nippy guy vs. lumbering giant and so it proves. Exile could not work any harder to try and focus on T-Rex’ vulnerabilities, but he cant quite keep away long enough to stay dangerous. As soon as the big guy gets hold of him, he locks in the Jurassic Crush and its sleepy time for Exile.


(D-)

Alicia makes her way down to the ring with Joss. She already has a black eye and now Joss is looking decidedly bashed up too.
Alicia “Towers, we told you we were coming for your titles, but c’mon, act like grownups can you? Yes I’m a girl, and yes I want to fight you. In the ring. Not both of you together with your stone-age boss when I’m on my own. We were going to call you down for a shot at your titles, but beating up on Joss means I’m on my own. You know what? I don’t care! My dad beat worse odds than that and I can too. Mick Muscles, you’ve got a choice. You can come down here and get beat by a girl, or you can stay back there and everyone will know you’re too scared to fight a girl”
Mick’s lack of presence is clear and obvious.
Alicia “Yeah I thought so. You guys are the worst kind of cowards. Never mind. Now we’ll definitely be coming for your tag belts.”


(C+)


Dirty White Boys vs. Forces America
The newly reformed DWB are clearly excited at fighting together again and click well. It helps that they’re 15 years younger than the Forces and can actually wrestle too. After some back and forth, they set Cap USA for the Chain Reaction and its goodnight sweethearts.

(E+)

Sam strolls out to the ring with his mic.
Sam “You know ladies and gentlemen, when I was still fighting (ROAR!) Men were men and women were women. In bikinis. It’s not like that anymore, and some girls can really fight, but it’s a shame men don’t want to be men anymore. When on of my top guys, a champ no less doesn’t show up for a challenge it embarrasses me. And it makes me look stupid. Mick Muscles, by hell you’re going to fight my daughter. And it’s going to be one on one. Get your ass down here now, or don’t ever come back!”
Mick sheepishly appears. He doesn’t look scared, but he’s clearly uncomfortable to be on his own.

Alicia Strong vs. Mick Muscles
Mick I trying to make up for what people might think of him and storms out with big offensive moves. Alicia is more cagey and is clearly trying to wrestle rather than get caught in a slugfest. She wriggles out of distance a few times and responds a little but Mick scents blood. He hurls her in the corner and goes for a big clothesline over the top rope. However, Alicia slips into an amazing reversal that ends with Mick bent over the turnbuckle and shockingly forced to tap out.>>


(D)


Alicia is clearly ecstatic at hr biggest moment in the ring in her carer so far. Joss runs in to help hr celebrate and it all goes a bit over the top.


(D+)

Just as Joss and Alicia are getting carried away Sam appears again.


Sam “I’m pleased for you baby girl. I always knew you could be a star and now you’ve beaten a man mountain like Mick. Even if he does make me ashamed to be his boss. I didn’t want your boyfriend to be left out though, so in the interest of fairness, he’s fighting tonight too.”
Joss “Sam, I’m not sure if you saw, but earlier, I got a bit of a kicking trying to look after your little girl. I’m not 100% you know?”
Sam “I saw, son. But I don’t care. If you think you’re the guy for Alicia, then you gotta be tough. So let’s see how tough you are tonight as you take on someone that has proved his toughness over the years. One of my oldest friends, Pete Valentine”


(B-)


Whilst we’re at it, I’m putting another match in. Its time for our champ to prove he’s a fighting champ. Bruce has been messing about with that belt, and I think its time to show some respect. Tonight he’s going to have to fight a real challenger. A deadly, brutal fighter who’s been around enough to pick up some tricks. Tonight, for the USPW World title, it’s Bruce vs. our TV champion Anger.”


(B-)


We see Anger dressed in his black robes backstage grinning. As the camera pans out, we see that he is surrounded by candles and reading from a black-bound book.


(D)


Bruce vs. Anger for the USPW World Title
Anger makes his way to the ring, and Bruce looks distinctly uneasy. However, the big Aussie uses his awesome strength and power and Anger struggles to get offence in. Regardless, Anger manages to trip Bruce and goes to work on his ankles. Bruce can’t quite fight him off and looks in serious pain. Anger locks in his hell Lock and it looks like Bruce will tap out. Somehow, the giant manages to climb up with Anger on his back and counter into a powerbomb. Anger looks tired and after a Giant Chokeslam, it’s another win for Bruce.


(D-)


As Bruce celebrates in the ring, Joss enters.
Joss “Well done on the win Bruce. That was a seriously tough one, and I’m genuinely impressed you pulled the win off. Now I’m fighting the Heartbreaker next and its no secret you and he have had a bit of history. He’s a cheating, dirty old bastard so I need to make sure that we aren’t interrupted by anyone. Do me a favour and hang around ringside would you? If anyone, say the Towers come down, make sure they leave me and Pete to it, and I’ll do you a favour by making sure Pete isn’t in any position to come after you again. What do you say?
Bruce “G’day mate. You’ve sure got a nerve bowling on down here and ordering me about. I can see what’s got Sam’s kecks in a twist, but I like your balls. A little fella like you needs a break, and that Sheila of yours is worth looking after. I’ll keep them off your back, but make sure you help me out. I want to see Valentine go down”


(C)


Joss Thompson vs. Peter Valentine
Pete is pretty taken back by all the tension, but Joss is clearly not impressed by the dirty old man. He’s may be getting on a bit, but the Heartbreaker can brawl with the best of them and trades big punches with Joss. The match devolves a bit into a scuffle, but the younger man’s stamina shows and he hits his clean cutter for the win. As the show finishes, Bruce offers him his giant hand and they shake.


(D)


Show rating D

[kislingbury]

Sam has some mixed feedback after the last show

Sam “Wow. Justice and Jet had some match last night eh? Why the hell was that only a dark match? At least we’re steady but I’m not sure about this. You promised me my daughter and Joss would be off the charts, but the crowd are clearly thinking ‘so what’? And Alicia didn’t look good with Mick. Keep them apart if you can”

Me “It was always going to take time to get going boss. Trust me. People will get into Alicia and Joss”

Sam “OK, you’ve got a couple months to keep going. Then we’ll see son. Other business: I’ve had a couple of our guys say you’ve sacked them. What’s going on?”

Me “Had to do it boss. Jumbo Jackson, Freddy the Bull… Those guys are awful. I can’t use them, so out they go. On the other hand, I’ve got some guys say they’ll come down to get involved.
Grease Hogg is Leadbelly’s old tag partner. They rock the biker gang thing together and should help us get some of our newer teams over. He’s only 30.
UK dragon will be good here. I know the English cant really rock the masked fighter thing, but Drag is only 32 and talented.
Steve Flash is the big name. He’s been around the block a few times, but everyone in the US knows him. Yeah, everyone knows Bruce too, but Steve can actually hold his own”
And best of all, Nicky Champion and Des Davids have both resigned with us. Nicky’s your kid, and Des could be a big player, so we’ll give them both a bit of push”

Sam “I am Jack’s unconvinced frowning boss. Save me some money, get my crowd excited and we’re good. Otherwise, I’m putting Redwood in charge”

[kislingbury]

USPW Freedom Fight
Week 3 April 2008
Attendance 2,000 (sold out)

Pre-show dark matches

Jaime Quinn vs. Geena the Warrior Princess
Standard girl slugfest, but Geena’s raw power comes to bear for the win.

(E-)

Cherry Bomb vs. Pete Valentine
Peter wins as he hits his Heartbreaker on a poor, defenceless girl.

(D+)

Main Show

Sam comes out to introduce the show
Sam “Tonight we’re going to see some of the biggest matches in USPW history. I’m personally going to ensure that no-one messes about, things get done, and every single fan goes home with a smile on his face. My daughter, Bruce, Joss, Jimmy Justice, Madman Boone and all your favourite fighters are here tonight so hold on tight.
“First, to determine the number one contenders for the Towers of Power’s tag-team belts, we’re going to see the unstoppable, untamed Savage Fury take on the young pretenders Red Hot in the final of the qualifying tournament.”

(A)

A video plays to show Savage Fury in their natural element hunting and fighting a komodo dragon with their bare hands.

(E)

Savage Fury (Java and Tribal Warrior) vs. Red Hot (Davis Wayne Newton and Des Davids) for the no.1 contenders’ title for the tag belts
As expected, the islanders unlash power move after power move, and if Des in particular didn’t com from a pro-football background, we might be looking at a capitulation. However, they can’t keep it up, and Des manages to distract Java whilst DWN hits a stunning backbreaker on Tribal Warrior. Red Hot win in a massive upset.

(D-)

Velocidad and Burning Exile are backstage looking through the trestle tables set up with food. They are clearly upset with not being able to find any Japanese/Mexican food
Exile “Im thinking abou”
Velocidad ” Yo sé. Todo lo que tan mal gusto que hace que mi ombligo fluff mirar apetecible”
Exile “sucking the ”
Velocidad “Totalmente extrema amigo. Vamos a hacerlo!”

Madman Boone saunters by and casually pushes them both over the table. As thy struggle to get up, he nonchalantly smashes their heads together. A hand appears on Boone’s shoulder. It’s Freddie.
Freddie ”Hold on there Boone. Better let them get up.”
Madman “And what you going to do about it Datsun?”
Freddie “One way to find out. You and me right now.
Madman “Fight you? In a heartbeat. Right here, hardcore style”
Freddie “It’s on Boone. Let’s go”

(D)

As a referee is called a short video plays on the big screen showing Madman’s backstage bullying and Freddie standing up for little guys.

(C)

The ref appears and the two men go at it in the food area

Freddie Datsun vs. Madman Boone (Hardcore rules)
The two make a total mess of the food, with tables being flung around, and electric cables used in ways that have never been seen before. The more Freddie throws food in Madman’s face the angrier Madman gets, until he manages to grab Freddie on top of a table, and hits the Boone or bust right through several plates of crisps, pizza and M&Ms. Freddie is clearly unconscious, and Madman puts him down for 3.

(D)

As madman struggles up, Sheik Mustafa approaches accompanied by the Towers of Power.
Sheik “As I’m sure you have noticed, my new Emirate is growing in power. We have a vacancy for an uncontrollable bully prone to fits of rage, and anyone that can lave Datsun lying in sugar-coated debris is on the shortlist of one. Sign this contract”
Madman “Can you guarantee me the chance to beat up more snivelling idiots?”
The Sheik just nods and Madman hesitates for about half a second before signing.

(C-)

The Hillbillies are sitting in what looks like a log shack. Out the window can be seen the stadium car park, but they seem oblivious.

Al “I’ve got me here a plan to take care o’ that thar monster boy, and get us boys a-winnin’”
Pete “Yip. I’m all a-quiver to hear summa yur cleverin cuz Al”
Al “We’m gonna take this-un special brew and use it like catfish bait”
Pete “hur-hur. That dang monster ain’t gonna know what hit ‘im! You sure are the clever one cuz”
Al “Reckon. Say, isn’t this your mommas brew?”
Pete “Damn straight cuz. Course these days; she’s my wife too…”

(E+)

Giant redwood I seen psyching himself up. He seems pretty compus mentus, but h sniffs at the air, and grows noticeably more agitated. He surges to his feet and runs out of his dressing room, not even pausing to open the door first.

(D-)

Hillbillies vs. Giant Redwood
The Hillbillies are in the ring waiting as Redwood storms down to the ring. Both Hillbillies gulp and step forward to attack the giant. It’s no surprise as Redwood tosses them round like toys, but after two minutes of overwhelming force, Pete reaches into hi dungarees and pulls out a clear bottle. He pours its contents onto the floor and heads backstage leaving a trail on the floor. Redwood immediately breaks off his assault and follows the trail licking at the floor. By the time he reaches the top of the apron, he appears calmer and the Hillbillies slap a chain around him. Once he is secured, they pass him the bottle and manage to lead him off backstage

(E) Match
(B-) booze segment

James Justice is in the library (!?) backstage reading a heavy, leather-bound book. Hi mum is also present.
JJ “I’ve been going over precedents, but I just can’t find a decent case of bikers and misfits beating up on a surfing wrestler turned lawyer”
Mrs Justice “Maybe you should be working harder then sweetie. ”
JJ “I am studying mum, its not here”
Mrs Justice “Why don’t you ask that nice boy Bryan for help?”
JJ “No can do. I’ve got my match with Leadbelly right now. Wish m luck”

(C+)

Leadbelly is seen with his partner Grease Hogg. The two are knocking on a door. The door opens but we can’t se who’s inside.
Leadbelly “Dude, I’m going up against Justice tonight. Thought you should know”
Grease Hogg “You don’t need this guy’s help bro. I got your back”
Muffled voice “Listen to your little friend. I’m sitting this one out”.

(D)

James Justice (with his mum) vs. Leadbelly (with Grease Hogg)
Leadbelly has something of the desperate about him, but with Grease Hogg getting liberally involved, JJ is on the back foot. Unfortunately for the Dirty White Boys, class will out, and JJ manages to knock Hogg down onto the floor. In a fair fight, he is clearly dominant, but just as the match heads to a conclusion, Bryan Holmes storms the ring and absolutely clatters JJ. Ho applies an ankle lock and JJ taps, but the referee cant pull Bryan off and h continues to squeeze until security storm the ring.

(D) match
(D+) attack

Nicky Champion accompanied by his secretary Seduction com to the ring.
Nicky “The USPW TV title is one of the highest validations a fighter can come by in this business, so I wasn’t happy when Anger took it from me a few weeks back. He may be an immortal, evil demon, but I’m Nicky Champion. Even Sam Strong thinks I’m a star, and no-one in this company can match me on my day. Tonight I’m taking back my gold”

(C-)

T-Rex vs. Anger vs. Nicky Champion for the USPW TV title
Nicky goes straight for Anger here laving the giant T-Rex unsure as to what to do. Strangely, Nicky appears to be tiring quickly and getting hurt by some weak-looking punches and slaps. In fact he goes down breathing hard giving T-Rex his chance to get involved. Anger has no chance against the big guy after being tired out, and TRex manages to toss him over the top rope. Suddenly, Nicky comes back to life and comes at T-Rex like a hurricane. Rex is clearly surprised and steps backwards falling over his own massive feet. That’s the chance Nicky needed, and as T-Rex gets up again he’s on the top rope. Hawkeye Hammer. Nicky pins T-Rex and regains the title.

(D-)

T-Rex however is far from don, just surprised and rails against Nicky. He sticks his boot in, and leaves Nicky bleeding and being consoled by Seduction.

(B-)

Bruce comes out with a mic enfolded by his enormous fists.
Bruce “In the last few weeks Alicia Strong and Joss have been making waves. And last week, Joss did me a favour by taking out Peter Valentine. I’m a fair dinkum guy, and us Aussies always play fair, so tonight I’m giving him a shot at me. Sam said I had to defend in a cage, so I’m going for a friendly face. Me and Joss, we’re respectful of each other, so tonight’s your chance Joss”

(C+)

Sam appears from backstage
Sam “Well hold on there Bruce. I’m pretty sure that it’s me who makes the matches round here and I’m not sure Joss deserves a shot. Why should I say yes son?”
Bruce “Simple boss. You said I’ve got to defend tonight and who else is worth a shot? Most anyone who can fight has already been on, and anyone left hasn’t got a Pom’s chance in the Ashes against me”
Sam “You know what son? I’ve thought of something else. Joss still claims he loves my daughter so you’re right. Let’s see him prove it. By showing he’s brave enough to fight a 7’6” Aussie”

(A)

Bruce vs. Joss Thompson for the USPW championship
Joss comes out with Alicia and enters the ring as the cage is lowered. He looks excited to be receiving a surprise title shot.
The match begins and Joss tries to lock up. Bruce shrugs him off. Joss attempts to whip Bruce, but he doesn’t move. Eventually Bruce starts the match properly but the template is clear; Bruce is here to win whilst Joss is showing respect. The match goes on with Bruce demonstrating and Alicia gets more agitated outside the cage. As she calls to Joss, Bruce sees her and whilst staring her down, picks Joss up with one hand. Giant Chokeslam! He reaches down and picks Joss up again. Another Giant Chokeslam! Bruce then pins him contemptuously with one foot on his chest before picking him up again for a third Chokeslam.

(D) match
(C) attack

As he exits the cage, Alicia confronts him clearly enraged at Bruce’s unnecessary violence. Bruce proceeds to pick her up and slams her down with another Giant Chokeslam before leaving the ring area.

(D)

The show ends with Alicia and Joss lying broken and bloodied on the floor as Bruce walks up the ring whistling “Waltzing Matilda”

Overall show rating: D

[kislingbury]

USPW Family Wrestling
Wednesday week 3 April 2008
West Texas Coliseum
Attendance: 2,000 (Sold out)

Pre-show

Peter Valentine vs. UK Dragon
Valentine wins without ever really breaking a sweat. The two don’t really click.

(D)

Main show

The lights come up with Sam on stage. He’s not happy at all.
Sam “When Alicia was a little girl she always watched my matches, and every time I lost I had to tell her that Daddy was ok really. It didn’t work and she always cried her eyes out anyway. Well now it’s her that’s hurt, and I’m the one crying after Bruce’s disgusting attack on a girl that’s a third of his size. But the difference is, I can do something about it. Bruce, don’t think you’ve gotten away with it. I know where I can find you any time, so sleep with on eye open.
“Tonight I’ll be in an emergency family meeting with Alicia and Joss so I’m leaving Sheik Mustafa in charge. Bruce, this hasn’t even begun yet”

(A)

Sheik Mustafa comes out to the ring after Sam leaves
Sheik “With Sam otherwise engaged, Ill be looking after business tonight so listen up people. Things are going to be a bit more structured, and maybe you Americans can learn something from an older, more traditional culture. In tonight’s first match Bryan Holmes will be taking on… Burning Exile.

(C-)

Bryan Holmes vs. Burning Exile
Always a mismatch, this is hamstrung by Exile being off his game. Nevertheless, he gets in some high-risk offence, but Holmes’ mastery of technical wrestling control the match and hi cyclone shock kick puts the Japans daredevil down.

(D-)

The Sheik is in the ring with Bruce.
Sheik ”Bruce, you attacked an unarmed woman for what looked like no reason at Freedom Fight. In my country, we do not hit women (in public). How can you explain your actions?”
Bruce “I’m not big on hitting Sheilas myself mate, but where I’m from, they don’t think they can hit back. The Strong girl has been sticking her nose in and around men’s business. We’re a wrestling company right? Blokes wrestle, girls wear bikinis and pour beers. Joss thinks he’s a big-shot all of a sudden, but at least he can fight. Alicia needs to know her place”
Sheik “I understand Bruce. In fact, as we have discussed, our views mesh very closely, so here is the contract we have spoken about to join the Emirate…”
Bruce signs the contract and takes the mic back
Bruce “Alicia, I know you’re hurting, but you can walk away. All you’ve got to do is quit and let us guys get on with business. Sam and Joss, don’t be stupid. Let it go and we don’t have a problem. Failing that… You know where I am”

(C+)

James Justice is waiting outside the commissioner’s office with a file. As the Sheik appears he steps forward
JJ “I’m here to charge Bryan Holmes with assault, affray and grievous bodily harm after he interfered and stopped my match at Freedom Fight. He is required to attend a hearing next week.”
Sheik “This I the best you can do? Bryan gave you the beatdown that you asked for. Lawyers are cum so you deserve it. Jut accept the occasional attack as a perk of the job”
JJ “Whatever Sheik. You’re acting Commish, it your job to inform him”
Sheik “He will be there. And as a reward, you will have the opportunity to finish your match tonight. Following on from Freedom Fight it will be James Justice taking on the Dirty White Boys”
JJ “A handicap match?”
Sheik “No, a tag-team. Your partner will be Mrs Helen Justice. Your mother.”

(C+)

James & Helen Justice vs. the Dirty White Boys
JJ keeps his mum out of this as much as possible and looks great, as he’s clearly the most athletic fighter on show. The DWBs work together well but JJ manages to put Leadbelly down outside the ring whilst he hit Grease Hog with the Liberation Slam. Win for the Justices.

(D)

Peter Valentine is in the ring in his monogrammed dressing gown in dirty old man mode.
Pete “You know, I’m getting a bit older these days and I’ve had a great career. I think it time I passed on some of my experience so I’m going to take on a protégé. A female protégé. I’ve narrowed the list of lucky ladies down to two, and tonight we’re going to make the choice in a double-barrelled challenge. Part on will be a bikini contest!”
Cherry Bomb and Geena the warrior princess com down to the ring to parade in their undercrackers whilst Pete presides and points out salient features like the old perv he is. Cherry Bomb is crowned the winner by crowd noise.

(D+)

Pete “Leg on to Cherry, but I promised a 2-parter. Now the girls are going to fight it out. Still in their bikinis!” Pete looks like he’s going to have an aneurysm with excitement.

Cherry Bomb vs. Geena the Warrior Princess
This is very low on quality, but high on flesh. A few slaps fly about but nothing particularly exciting. Cherry wins with a submission move that puts Geena in a very compromising position.

(E+)

A video plays hyping Red Hot’s win in the number one contenders tournament for the tag titles. The focus is very much on them being the underdogs so far, and really up against it with the Towers of Power.

(D)

Towers of Power vs. Red Hot for the Tag Team Titles
The Towers use this as an excuse to let some of their frustrations out after not doing so well against Joss and Alicia recently and poor Red Hot get tossed around like dolls. Davis Wayne Newton especially gets the brunt of it and is eventually pinned by Mick Muscles patented Bulldozer Powerbomb.

(E+)

The Sheik introduces the next match;
Sheik “For my next match I’m going to take one fighter who has been successful, but is now a faded shell of himself, newly deposed TV champion the Demon Anger and match him against someone else that has no place in the new order here. Recently this man has been a nuisance, but my new client Madman Boone will be disposing of him shortly. Freddie Datsun

(C-)

Anger vs. Freddie Datsun
Freddie is on a mission here after his hardcore defeat by Madman at freedom Fight and tears into the older man. Anger tries hard to counter, but doesn’t have the energy and speed of Datsun. Datsun hits a series of huge punches then whips Anger into a Patriot Press. Win for Freddie.

(C+)

As the lights come up in the ring, we see Sam and Joss have arrived from the Strong family meeting.
Sam “As you know, we’ve been closed away with Alicia tonight thinking about our options and some difficult decisions have been made.
“One. Together, Alicia and I are stronger than ever. And so I’m accepting Joss into the Strong family. He now has my full backing.
“Two. None of us can forgive Bruce what he did and so we will all be coming for you. I don’t care who your new manager is, your ass belongs to the Strongs, son.

(C+)

“Three. I’m making a match for tonight. Joss is hurting, but he’s twice the man Bruce is so it will be Joss vs. Bruce for the title right here and now!”

(B)

Sheik Mustafa and Bruce appear on the apron
Sheik “It’s nice to se you out here together. I appreciate a family unit even if the young ones are fornicating unmarried infidels. And Bruce and I accept the offer of a title match. However in accordance with the championship contract, Bruce only has to defend his title once a month which he clearly did days ago at Freedom Fight.”
Bruce “That’s right. Ill fight tonight, but the contract says I get to pick my opponent. And I’m picking the only one of you that isn’t here: Alicia Strong”
Sam “She can’t fight. She’s backstage recovering from your dirty attack son! Give me that contract!”

As Sam rages, Alicia’s music plays and she emerges from backstage limping and bruised.
Alicia “Leave it daddy. If these jokers think they can keep me down, they don’t know me. I’m a fighting Strong member and I’m here. As long as I can walk I can fight. Ring the bell!”

(C-)

Alicia Strong vs. Bruce for the USPW title
Bruce is easily 2’ taller and 500lbs heavier than Alicia, even when fully fit, but she bravely goes after the big man by concentrating on his legs. Bruce is nonplussed however and seems to be toying with Alicia. Alicia sense opportunity and manages to knock Bruce down with a rolling wheel kick but it only serves to enrage the big man who seizes Alicia before hitting her with another Giant Chokeslam; her third in a week. Crushing win for Bruce.

(C)

The show finishes with Bruce victorious again over the Family Strong.

Show rating: (C-)

[kislingbury]

Sam “Holy cow son, maybe you’re not such a clueless dolt after all. Back in my glory days, I put on better shows at the end of Alicia’s term at school, but you said things would improve and you might be right.”

Me “Hold on boss. Freedom Fight went ok, but it didn’t turn us around. We still need to get better and soonest”

Sam “I know son. But you hit two C matches, and a bunch of other things moved along. The fans are already excited about the new Family Strong storyline, we had a match featuring an old lady that didn’t totally bomb and I’m seeing improvement.”
“One thing to watch though, I’ve heard a few people aren’t happy with how they’re being used. Make sure you keep the spirits up, cos I can’t have a bad dressing room”

Me “What? You’re the on that’s friends with Valentine and Redwood! Those guys are a nightmare backstage…”

Sam “I said don’t get carried away. Me: boss, you: holding on to good fortune by skin of teeth. Now, fetch me my slipper son.”

[kislingbury]

USPW Family Night Wrestling

Wednesday week 4 April 2008

Arkansas Coliseum

Attendance: 2,000 (sold out)

Pre-show

Jacob Jett vs. Velocidad
Very little of our trademark brawling here as JJ’s technical nous overcomes Velocidad’s high-impact moves

(D+)

Grease Hogg vs. Davis Wayne Newton
A bit more physical as these two show their broad range of skills. Hogg wins with a nasty little cobra clutch.

(D)

Main show

Sam is seen in what looks like a boardroom, leaning against a polished table.

Sam “Welcome everyone to a new age of USPW. Last week’s show was a landmark. The last time someone that’s not a Strong call the shots, the last time I don’t get my way on my own show, and the last time my little girl gets attacked by some anti-American, thankless, selfless bastard in my house!
“Joss, Alicia and I were thrust into this. We didn’t ask for trouble, but we sure as hell aren’t going to sit back and take it either. We were standing alone and unorganised, but no more. Now we have a united front and a strategy, and we’ll b taking back what is ours.
Sheik Mustafa and The Emirate might find themselves in a bit of a spot pretty soon, so Sheik? Until then, sit back and enjoy yourself while you can. Son.”

(A)

T-Rex is seen in his dressing room. It is festooned with a large amount of dinosaurs. Cuddly ones, jigsaws, pictures, you name it.

T-Rex “Rargh! Des Davids, The T-Rex is going to eat you for his dinner! He’s a terrible lizard! Rargh!”

(B)

T-Rex vs. Des Davids
As an ex-football player, Des has the best physique in USPW, but he doesn’t have the raw power of the massive Rex. This match quickly devolves into a brawl full of punches and kicks, but it’s still quite impressive to see from these chaps. Des puts in an impressive amount of offence, but can only escape so long. Once T-Rex gets close enough, he enfolds Des and locks in his Jurassic Crush (a standing bearhug/head-squeeze combo) and Des is forced to submit.

(D)

In the carpark, we see the Hillbillies log cabin set up. Strangely, it appears to be shaking. As the camera pans inside, we can see that Pete and Al are somewhat squashed as they have been joined by Giant Redwood. To make things worse, Redwood has clearly been dosed up on moonshine to keep him docile and is loudly singing the soundtrack from ‘Deliverance’.
Pete “Woah brother Al, we’m gonna be a-jiggin in the streets tonight!”
Al “Amen Brother Pete. Them thar Savage Fury boys ain’t gonna know what a-hit ‘em!”
Redwood “Diddl-ing, ding-ding, ding-ding, ding-ding…”

(B)

The Hillbillies vs. Savage Fury
My golly, not sure how many people could have enjoyed this match from a technical point of view, but in true USPW style, at least it had four large angry people punching each other. Java was cleaning up and had set Pete up for a powerbomb when he managed to pull out small bottle and uncork it. Cue Redwood steaming into the ring and destroying both savages. DQ against the Hillbillies, but they didn’t care.

(E)

After the match Redwood gulp down the XXXX and become so enraged he continues the beatdown before sprinting off with the Hillbillies desperately chasing him with chain and padlock.

(D-)

Steve Flash wanders down to the ring for his first USPW appearance. He’s wearing tie-dye and comes in a cloud of aromatic smoke clinging to his long hair and beard. For a man in his 40s, he’s in great shape but this is offset by the white Russian in his hand.
Steve “Like, hi everybody. Im, ummmm Steve Flash. You might remember me from the tube and stuff? Errrm, I owed Sam a favour, I think, and so I’m just ah… here for a match?” Against some biker dude? Bellybed or something?”

(B)

Steve Flash vs. Leadbelly
Flash is quite a famous chap from his glowing career, and the crowd are excited to see him. He’s also got a varied style and uses a lot of hi versatility to keep Leadbelly off balance. Although he stumbles around off balance, he has the speed when necessary and rolls Leadbelly up for a pin.

(C-)

Flash celebrates his maiden victory in the ring with another white Russian.
Flash “Like, thank so much everyone. Really pleased to be here. Has anyone seen my rug?”

(C+)

James Justice is in the ring mic in hand
JJ “I can take some troubles, I can take some ridicule about my professional choices, I can even take violence in the face of the law. I’m a tolerant man. But what I can’t take is anyone attacking my family. Sheik Mustafa forcing my mother to fight last week was beyond the pale, so tonight I’m going to…

Sam appears
Sam “You’re going to do nothing Justice. I don’t agree with your mother fighting either, but I told you. I’m calling the shots round here and if anyone tries to go solo here’s what happens. You’ve got a match right now against someone that will not listen, will not sympathise and absolutely will not stop. Right here right now, you’re fighting the Demon Anger. And to make sure you get the message; it’s a submission match”

(C-)

James Justice (with his mum) vs. Anger
JJ is all offence early on, but Anger soaks it up. JJ isn’t used to forcing submission moves and it shows, whilst Anger has a number of vicious options. JJ looks increasingly desperate before his mother calls to him. Smash, bang wallop, JJ rolls up Anger into a Cobra Clutch. Victory for JJ.

(D-)

Sam, Alicia and Joss are debating strategy in the boardroom.
Sam “I hate to say it, but Mustafa was right. We can’t force Bruce to defend his title for another month without him picking the opponent”
Joss “Who the hell cares? I'll just go after him!”
Alicia “Thanks for the offer, but then Daddy will have to discipline you, or everything would fall apart”
Joss “Well I’m going to fight someone tonight, they’ve got to pay for what they did to you”
Sam “You’re right son. We can do this the long way round. Get to the ring in two minutes and Ill get the paperwork done”

(C+)

Joss Thompson vs. Madman Boone
Madman, as always attempts to build his rage by deliberately going into contact early and hard, but Joss I something else tonight. Angry enough to do damage, but controlled enough to use his brain and range of moves. It turns into a cat-and-mouse game of Madman charging round and Joss picking his moments, but the smarter man wins. Cleancutter from Joss and Madman’ down for the 3 count.

(C-)

Nicky Champion comes down to the ring wearing his TV title belt
Nicky “Everyone knows Sam Strong is like a father to me and it hurts to see him disrespected by so many people. I’ve got no respect for people who hide behind rules and regulations, and you all damn well know Sam Strong doesn’t either. Bruce can carry on picking on girls as much as he wants, but Sam is the boss here and if h needs my help, I’m not going to back away. That why I’m putting my title on the line tonight against the challenger of my choice. Right here, I want Bruce the Giant in this ring”

Bruce wanders down towering above Nicky by a good 18 inches.
Bruce “A little fella like you eh? Now why would I want that belt when I've got my own bigger better one? Tell you what. You’ve got some plums coming out here to challenge me, and I respect a bloke who stands up for himself so I'll take you on. But to be clear. No way are you getting your hands on my belt mate.”

(C)

Nicky Champion vs. Bruce for the TV title
Nicky is clearly wrestling better than he ever has before and the match goes back and forth as he attacks Bruce’s weak point: those ankles that have to support 700lbs of Aussie. Bruce starts off dismissive of the smaller man, but is clearly working harder and harder. Nevertheless, Bruce is the class here and manages to raise Nicky by his throat all set for the giant Chokeslam. Just at that moment of course Alicia runs in with a baseball bat. She I clearly out of control and not thinking right and starts to lay into Bruce. The ref immediately DQs Nicky due to interference, but he retains the TV belt.

(C)

After the shock of Alicia’s attack, Bruce manages to regain his feet with a roar and goes for Alicia, but Sam and Joss also run into the ring and stand before Bruce
Joss “Go for it Bruce. Think you can go through me and Sam to get to her? Try it!”
Bruce looks between the three of them and Nicky and thinks better of an attack before backing away and exiting the arena.

(B)

Overall show rating: C

[kislingbury]

Sam "You did good son. That was the best show since you've been on board. My boy Nicky did great against Bruce, Joss and Madman got the crowd going and Flash's debut with Leadbelly went over very nicely."

Me "Totally agree they were the high points, but what's with Redwood? The crowd are loving him at the moment! If the Hillbillies could actually wrestle, we could ride them to the bank, but it looks like we might have to think of a plan B there. And in hindsight it was a mistake to put Anger and Justice in a submission match. JJ just cant look good in that sort of environment"

Sam "Son. I dont care. Either way, keep doing it and dont forget, I'm counting on you for a boost for my buddies. Nicky should be headlining all the time, and I'm expecting Pete Valentine to start getting used a lot more. I owe that guy"

Me "Hmmm. that might be even more of a challenge than the Hillbillies boss, but I'll try"

Sam "Glad to hear it. One last thing, apparently the show did 0.3 TVRs. That's our best yet, and just as we start to renegotiate our TV deal."

[kislingbury]

USPW Family Night
Week 1 May 2008
Huntsville Arena
Attendance: 3,972

As usual, Sam introduces the show
Sam “My family and I were touched last week by a selfless act. Nicky, you’re like a son to me son, and I won’t forget you putting your belt on the line to go up against Bruce. Believe me, the Strongs always remember our friends, especially in times of trouble…”
Madman Boon jumps into the ring and shoes Sam aside
Boone “That’s a bunch of horseshit old man! I’ve had enough of this whining from you and your brat daughter! Bruce is the talent here, your girl got in the way, and now you can’t get over it. I got news; the Strongs are history, and I and the rest of the Emirate are the future. Now put up or shut up. I’m here and ready, so bring out one of your little kids and let’s go”
Sam is furious and looks like he’s going to go for Boone, but Nicky’s music plays
Nicky “Lets get this straight idiot. Sam. Is. Your. Boss. And h was wrestling for world titles when you were cleaning toilets for a living. I’m not going to listen to this so you wanted me? You got me. Get ready for an ass-kicking”

Nicky Champion v Madman Boone for the US Title
These two go at it hammer and tongs in a nasty little brawl. Sheik Mustafa surreptitiously grabs Nicky’s belt, and when Champion goes up top for the Hawkeye Hammer, Madman drives it up into the flying Nicky. Nicky is obviously reeling and looks down and out, but Sam demands the ref ring the bell for the DQ.

(D+)

Nevertheless, Bruce and the Towers of Power rush down to the ring and the Emirate gives Nicky a bit of a stomping daring Sam to get involved.

(C)

Roderick Remus is seen in the carpark arriving in a stretch limo with Jacob Jett. Jett holds a bottle of champagne, but Rod is rubbing his eyes looking exhausted. Davis W Newton sidles up
DWN “Looks like you boys have been burning the candle at both ends again. Don’t you want to make names for yourselves?”
Jett “For those of us that are people who knows people, it just another night in a new town. I suppose you were in your hotel room reading? Or knitting?”
DWN “Pathetic. Actually I was working out in the gym. That’s why I’m going to the top, and you boys will never be nothing”
Jett “Yeah? I got 5 bucks says we’re in better shape than you after developing ‘relationships’ last night”
DWN “You’re on. Me and your boy Rod right here right now”
Remus looks extremely bewildered.
(D-)

Roderick Remus v Davis Wayne Newton
For two light-weight names, this is quit exciting as they can perform a surprisingly large number of moves beyond the standard. Unfortunately Rod is knackered and although Jett comes to ring with him, he isn’t much of a factor. Newton is a strong competitor though and manages a decisive pin.

(D)

T-Rex is seen in his dressing room. He’s wearing a pair of cuddly, furry dinosaur hands and watching Jurassic park.
T-Rex “Rargh! This is the best film ever! Dinosaurs will rule the world again! Snarl! Chomp!”
Commissioner Doom (our road agent and ex-star wrestler) pokes his had into the room
Doom “Match in 3 Rex”
T-rex leaps to his feet and we see he is wearing cuddly dino-feet too.

(B)

T-Rex v Des Davids
Des is an athletic guy, and at 6’6“ not an inconsiderable chap, but T-Rex’s raw power proves hard to handle. Unfortunately, Des is elusive and counters with power of his own, T-Rex picks up the win with a pinfall applied with leverage from the ropes. Des is incandescent with rage but Rex doesn’t care, he sprints off backstage to se if the raptors catch the kids in the kitchen.

(D)

Jacob Jett and Rod Remus are backstage in a hot tub drinking out of hollowed-out pineapples. Rod is looking battered and bruised from his earlier defeat but Jett is fresh as a daisy.
Jett “…and that’s how you could have won the match. A guy like Newton isn’t all that. He’s such a loser I bet he does sudokus”
Whilst Jett was ranting, DNW has walked up behind the hot tub
DNW “I was coming round to make the peace, but you can forget that. Jett, I’ve got you a match. In the ring in 3 minutes”

(D-)

Jacob Jett vs. Burning Exile
This is an unusual match for USPW with two little guys who don’t mind chucking themselves about a bit. Both men risk going for the big aerial moves and there are several times when it looks like neither can continue. The crux comes when Jett manages to hit a ‘Cleared for takeoff’ (back flip kick) on Exile who is outside the ring. Both men are down, but Jett manages to crawl back into the ring with help from Remus. Exile is counted out to give Jett the win.

(D)

James Justice and his mum are backstage with Sam.
JJ “I’m sorry for taking matters into my own hands, but your new guy Holmes is an idiot. He’s throwing his weight around and not respecting the law. I mean, I’m trying to be fair here, but he makes it hard. Someone’s gotta stand up for the little guys here, right?”
Sam “I’m not arguing son, but it’s got to be done in the right way. I believe in you as a fighter, you know that, but I expect you to tow the line too. Tell you what, to make things right, tonight I’ll give you a chance to go up against the Dirty White Boys. Tonight, right here in Huntsville, it’s James Justice vs. the DWBs. And as a partner? You get Freddie Datsun.”

(C-)

James Justice & Freddie Datsun vs. the Dirty White Boys
This is a chance for JJ in particular to get things out of his system and he starts on fire taking out both DWBs. JJ and Freddie establish timing and rhythm and the White Boys are on the ropes, but Bryan Holmes attacks JJ and leaves Datsun to fight alone. The DWBs manage to combine to wear Freddie down, but just as victory looks certain, Justice returns and uses his last energy to hit grease Hogg with the Liberation Slam. Win for Freddie and JJ.

(D+)

After the match, Justice and Freddie share a handshake in mutual respect.

(C-)

Steve Flash is relaxing backstage. For him that means doing nothing. And I don’t mean watching TV or fiddling with the paper. Hs doing nothing.Like in a trance. As h meditates away, Jaime Quine the young girl with a burgeoning reputation walks up and taps him on the shoulder
Jaime “Mr Flash? Wondered if I might have a word?”
Flash “Ah! That was like totally scary. Who are you?”
Jaime “I’m Jaime. Um, I think you might have known my mum.”
Flash “Do you look her? I’m pretty sure I’d remember her…”

(E+)

As they chat way, peter valentine and Cherry Bomb arrive.
Pete “I knew your mum Jaime. Me and her were…close. Maybe w could get together some time and I could tell you about it?”
Flash “Dude! She’s like, totally too young for that. You better watch that mouth”
Pete “Yawn. Enough of the tough guy Flash. If you really want to look after her, let’s take it to the ring. You two and us, right now”

(D)

Steve Flash and Jaime Quine vs. Peter Valentine and Cherry Bomb
Both guys start the match off and Flash appears reluctant to tag Jaime in, but the combination of Cherry and valentine wear him down and Jaime enters the ring eventually. Unfortunately, she doesn’t seem prepared, and Cherry slams her down for the pin.

(C-)

Sam comes to the ring with Alicia, Joss Thompson and Nicky Champion.
Sam “Nicky has put himself on the line for us again tonight, and surprise, surprise. The Sheik’s Emirate have acted like the cowards they are and ganged up on him. Well, I’ve had enough. Let see how those guys like it. I’m making a match tonight where the Towers of Power will defend their tag-team belts against Alicia and Joss, whilst me and Nicky make sure no funny business goes on. My little girl has got more reasons than anyone to beat the Towers, and I know Joss will fight his heart out for that girl. You have my word that Nicky and I will remain neutral, as long as no-one else comes to the ring.”

(C)

The Towers of Power vs. Alicia Strong & Joss Thompson for the tag-team titles
It weird seeing the Towers unaccompanied by the Sheik let alone the rest of the emirate (Madman and Bruce) and they’re clearly not comfortable. Several minuets into the brawl that Joss and Alicia are dominating, Bruce and the Sheik appear on the big screen (It USPW, so it’s about 3 feet across). The referee appears to look somewhat nervous at the sight but the match continues. Suddenly, the Towers both jump off the ring’s apron and go for Nicky and Sam. As they approach, Alicia and Joss go to help, but too quickly, Bruce enters the ring and smacks Alicia in the head sending her spinning. Joss goes for him, but Bruce runs as quickly as he arrives. Nevertheless Joss is furious, and as Mick Muscles re-enters the ring, he goes apeshit. Cleancutter and a pin and Joss and Alicia win the titles!

(D)

Sheik (from the big screen) “Not so fast young lovers. As I’m sure the referee will confirm, outside interference in a title belt is an automatic disqualification. Once that mystery man attacked Alicia, the bell should have rung. Am I right?”

The ref nods reluctantly…

Sheik “Then it’s final. The Towers retain the titles. Ladies and gentlemen, still your champions, Mick Muscles and Danny Rushmore!”

The show closes as a distraught Sam and Joss tend to a stunned Alicia and the Towers celebrate in the ring.

(A)

Overall show rating: D+

[kislingbury]

Scene: the boardroom
Mood: bad-tempered
Sam: a cross between livid and embarrassed

Sam “Listen up son. I’ve made a bit of a booboo.”
Me “You’ve lost one of those truckloads of babyoil again”
Sam “Worse than that”
Me “You’ve offered T-Rex a new contract?”
Sam “Worse than that”
Me “T-Rex has signed a new contract?”
Sam “Son, enough of this crap already. I accidentally cancelled our TV contract and so we’re not going to have any shows at all for the next couple of weeks, and we go straight back to our PPV The Brawl”
Me “So you’re saying that all the storylines we have building won’t be in place? And hang on, we haven’t got a PPV deal. Why are we still holding them?”
Sam “I’m not happy about this son. Don’t push your luck”
Me “Dammit boss. Things aren’t easy round here. See you at the show”

[kislingbury]

The Brawl

Arkansas Coliseum
Week 3 May 2008
Attendance – 2,000 sold out

Preshow dark matches

Grease Hogg vs. Velocidad
Surprisingly, Hogg took on Velocidad at his own game a bit here and took to the air for the victory.

(D+)

Leadbelly vs. Pete the Hillbilly
Pete managed to keep up with ‘belly’s technical skill but ultimately didn’t have the skill to win. Leadbelly gets the 3count.

(D-)

Main show

Sam comes to the ring to introduce the show.

Sam “Firstly, apologies to all our loyal fans. I know you will have noticed USPW’s absence from your TV screen due to legal issues. The man doesn’t want you to see us!
“However, welcome to the biggest night so far this year for USPW. Tonight is the first annual holding of The Brawl. Recently, some people have been throwing their weight around my company, and I’ve been trying to set the record straight. Tonight’s different. Tonight’s anyone’s chance to have their say. Whoever wins The Brawl this evening will receive a special prize. Not only will they hold the Brawl Belt for a year, but at any time during that year, they get to be commish for a night. They can decide opponents, organise matches, decide title shots. Hell, they can even get their best mate a match.
“15 men and women will enter tonight, but the identity of the brawlers will remain a mystery until they enter.”

(A)

Sam “Before then, there are one or two other scores to be settled… Firstly, Davis Wayne Newton of Red Hot will be taking on Jacob Jett in a TLC match”

(E)

Davis W Newton vs. Jacob Jett in a TLC match
The rivalry between these guys is starting to build, and it quickly becomes apparent that they are far more suited for a match like this than most USPW behemoths. DWN brings his bigger physique to bar though, and powerbombs Jett from a ladder through a table. Ouchy.

(D+)

Steve Flash I sitting in hi dressing gown, drink in hand looking puzzled as Jaime tries to interrogate him.
Jaime ”So my mum was around the wrestling scene when you met her. Maybe 25 years ago?”
Steve “Errm, pretty girl… Dark hair? Great pair of…”
Jaime “Eyes mr Flash! She does have pretty eyes. Were you two ever…close?”
Steve “To be honest sweetheart, I knew, like, a lot of girls back then. I was a party guy you know?”
Jaime “Maybe you remember her though? Maybe it was a special friendship?”
Steve “Ill try and remember. Anyway, you’ve got that match now haven’t you? With the red-haired chick?”

(D+)

Jaime Quinn vs. Cherry Bomb for the Women’s championship
Cherry is all power, and has the advantage of Pete Valentine in her corner (the sneaky, cheatin’ sumbitch) and looks to be the class here as she throws a game Jaime around the ring. The ref is intimidated by both heels, and they shortly set Quinn up for a vicious double move, when Steve Flash comes to the rescue. He knocks Valentine into Cherry, which gives Jaime enough time to gather her wits. With Cherry down, Jaime immediately applies a sweet bridge, and 1-2-3, we have a new women’s champ!

(D+)

James Justice is backstage in the library (?) again. He gives a promo straight to the camera:

JJ “Over the past few weeks, there has been a thorn in the side of justice. A few individuals have taken my quest for my law degree and treated it as a big joke. Yes, I’m only doing unpaid coursework. Yes, pro-bona work isn’t glamorous. Yes, I’m talking to you Bryan Holmes. And yes, you can bet your ass its time for payment as I kick your disrespectful ass.
“Time for joking is over, and the time for me showing everyone why I’m a big name here has arrived. I’m giving up my spot in the Brawl tonight for a shot at you right now. So, have you got the balls?”

(C-)

James Justice vs. Bryan Holmes
These two have a bit of history now and are quite aware of each others tactics and strengths. Both are cagy here and the match develops slowly. As JJ is gaining the upper hand however, the Dirty White Boys both storm the ring laying him out. All 3 men continue a nasty attack, and even smack JJ’s mum about a bit. Needless to say, Bryan picks up the win.

(C-)

After the match is cleared away we see Madman Boone on the big screen
Madman “There’s nothing I like more than seeing someone innocent and helpful. You know, one of those ‘nice guys’ that just can’t help being a good bloke. I see those people, and I like to kick their asses. Freddie Datsun is one of them. He’s been kicking around trying to help little fellas save themselves. Well bugger that. Anyone wants to go tote-to-toe with me, I say let ‘em. Anyone wants to hit me, go for it if you’ve got the balls. No-one tells me what to do, and Datsun is trying to tell m how to act. That ends tonight.”

(C+)

Sam comes to the top of the ring entrance.
Sam “I don’t agree with anyone being a bully, but I have to side with Boone on one thing. Stand up for yourselves. Freddie is a personal friend of min and I admire the guy, but of you can’t stand on your own two feet, you don’t belong in USPW. You boys get the match you both want.”

(B)

Madman Boone vs. Freddie Datsun
Although Madman I bigger and stronger, he doesn’t have the guile that Datsun does. Not only is Datsun slippery, he’s smart and it shows. Regardless, Madman manages to get some momentum with a series of massive punches. Freddie looks down and out, but he isn’t a hardcore legend for nothing. Freddie summons strength from somewhere and manages to weather the storm before unleashing a Patriot Press. Datsun wins with a clean 1-2-3.

(C-)

Unfortunately, Freddie is exhausted and can barely get up. Madman has the power though and certainly does get up. Before kicking the crap out of Freddie. He leaves Freddie down and coughing before swaggering off like he won the match.

(C-)

Sam, Alicia, Joss and Nicky all come to the ring.
Sam “With the prize on the line tonight, you’re going to see some big names fighting in the Brawl. And none bigger than these 3. Joss Thompson, my daughter Alicia and Nicky Champion will all be in the match.”
Alicia “And when I win that title, I’m going to be making some decisions. Bruce has been wearing that belt, but living in the stone-age. That will change when I make some decisions. And put that belt on a woman.”

(C+)

Sheik Mustafa comes out with the Emirate (Bruce and the Towers of Power)
Sheik “I think w know who’ll be walking away with that belt tonight. No-one here can get a 7ft, 550 lb Australian over the ropes, especially with my other guys in that ring to help. When we’re in charge, we’ll be even more dominant in the USPW. Not only will we hold the championship and tag titles, we’ll be able to get rid of who we want”

(C-)

The Brawl

Wrestlers involved:
Alicia Strong
Anger
Bruce
Burning Exile
Danny Rushmore
Des Davids
Geena the Warrior Princess
Giant Redwood
Java
Jim Force
Joss Thompson
Mean Jean Cattley
Mick Muscles
Nicky Champion
Pete Valentine
Steph Wade
Steve Flash
T-Rex
Tribal Warrior
UK Dragon

Highlights:
Bruce cleaned up after entering early including tossing Giant Redwood and T-Rex, two enormous men.
Des Davids managed a nice run eliminating Anger and Mean Jean before being tossed by Pete Valentine.
Alicia managed to knock out two men single-handedly (UK Dragon and Pete Valentine).
Steve flash exited very quickly at the hands of 4 others.

It came down eventually to Joss, Alicia and Bruce. Bruce put Joss down with a big boot and attacked Alicia but Joss managed to get up from a seeming coma, and push both the others over the rope as Bruce was strangling Alicia. Joss wins the Brawl title.

(C)

After the match, Sam presented Joss with the belt and went to celebrate, but Joss paused and grabbed a mic
Joss “It gives me little pleasure to win a title like this. I still think I can beat Bruce in a fair one-on-one fight and take his title if only I could get the chance. I also know Alicia could win too, but she’s not ready. And I’m not the kind of guy that will let my girl fight a monster. If anyone doesn’t like that, I’m not going to change or apologise, and they know where I am.
“In the meantime, one of these days soon, Ill b cashing in this prize, and when I’m Commish for a night, Bruce, you’d better watch out.”

(C+)

Overall show rating C+

[kislingbury]

My regular post-show meeting with Sam:

Sam “Well that was pretty decent son. The Brawl was a spectacle in itself, and the under card was pretty good. JJ is reliable; Freddie and Madman can really put on a good show and the fans are starting to get into Steve Flash and Pete Valentine.
“Joss looks like he can really put it together on the big occasion and that good chemistry he has with Bruce could be a winner for us.

Me “Thanks boss, It came together but a few problems came up. A couple of those guys we loaned in didn’t quit fit into what we were doing, and quite frankly, I’m expecting more anyway.”

Sam “Son, don’t get carried away. It was OK, but we’re never going to set the world alight like this. We need action, we need intrigue and we need our top guys to step up. And soon. Now, you’ve got a full build up before the next PPV “The New World” so let’s see what you’ve got. Good luck”

Me “Oh, one more thing boss. Java played a nasty little trick on Bruce the silly bastard. He only had a month left on his contract, so I’ve sacked him.”

Sam “Good work son, but remember, no-one’s untouchable round here if they get out of line. No-one”

[kislingbury]

June week 1

USPW Family Night
Arkansas Coliseum
Attendance: 2,000 – sold out

Pre show


Jacob Jett and Roderick Remus vs. Captain USA and Al the Hillbilly
Jett and Remus are the class here and their opponents can’t get hold of them due to being fat (Al HB) and old (Cap). Win for Jett/Remus

(E+)

Jaime Quinn vs. Geena the Warrior Princess
Easy win for Jaime




Main show

Sam is again seen in his boardroom with his feet up on the polished enormous table looking might pleased with himself.
Sam “As most of you know after watching the Brawl last week, we offered up a once-in-a-lifetime prize to one lucky man. The chance to take my job for a night. To be commissioner of USPW for on night. The ensuing battle attracted some big names including our champion Bruce the Giant and my own daughter. In a fair fight, young Joss Thompson managed to win so I’m here with him now. Joss, when do you plan on cashing in your prize?”

Joss “Well sir, firstly, I’m very proud to have been given the opportunity to win the first ever USPW brawl. Everyone knows I love this company, and it’s a great honour to be in the history books. I didn’t like having to eliminate Alicia, but we’ve talked it over and she understands why I did what I did. I’m waiting for the right time to be commish for a night, so I’ve got a personal message for Bruce: when I come, you’re going to know all about it. Enjoy your time with that belt cos you may be 7 foot tall, and you may be 600 lbs, but I’m twice the man you are and cream rises to the top. Sleep with on eye open Bruce”

(A)

We go to the ring and Alicia is there with a mic.

Alicia “Some people have assumed that I would be unhappy after Joss had to put me out with that trash Bruce at the brawl. Nothing could be further from the truth. We’re as strong as ever and I’m so pleased daddy has given him the chance to prove himself. Joss I a gentleman, but I’m a lady that doesn’t need anyone to stand up for me. Which is why I’m taking on a challenge tonight and fighting USPW’s ex-TV champion, the demon Anger.”

(C)

Alicia Strong vs. Anger

Alicia looks in the mood to get over her personal frustrations, even against the stronger, bigger Anger. In fact, she manages to finish up very quickly with a clean Angle Driver that puts Anger down for 3.

(D)

In the carpark, the Hillbillies are having a sing-along with a banjo. As the camera pans out, we can se that instead of a table they’re resting their feet and bottle of booze on Giant Redwood. Needless to say, redwood doesn’t look happy. At all.

(D+)

Giant Redwood vs. Jim Force
Old mental Jim doesn’t really have much of a chance as the big mountain monster comes out roaring. It impact moves all the way as Jim tries his hardest to just get out of the way. A big boot takes Force down, and then it’s a pin. Win for Redwood.

(E+)

Joss is walking down a corridor backstage with his Brawl belt over hi shoulder and stops suddenly. It’s MAWs star name Mean Jean Cattley.

Jean “You know I came to USPW for the brawl for on reason. To show the public I can win in any company. I’ve been a MAW legend, but I wanted to shine on the big stage. But Des Davids managed a lucky moment and put me out before I got a chance to go toe-to-toe with the big names round here. Well, now’s my chance. I want my big match with you”

Joss “I told you before Jean. I’m not scared of anyone round here, and I’m definitely not scared of an overhyped MAW one trick pony, but I don’t think you’re quite ready for the big…”

That’s as far as he gets as Jean unleashes his not-so secret weapon. A punch to the face. Joss immediately responds and it descends into a brawl until Alicia and Sam pull Joss away.

Joss “You got your match Jean. Tonight I’ll send you back to MAW.”

(C)

Red Hot vs. Pete Valentine and Cherry Bomb
This is a remarkably open match as ex-football star Des Davis in particular seems fired up. In fact, it’s only Red Hot’s greater experience as a tag that start to separate them with some innovative double-teams, but Pete Valentine has an answer to that. Cheat outrageously. Cherry distracts the ref with some suggestive moves, and Pete applies a couple of judicious blows with knuckledusters. Both of Red Hot go down, and it’s an easy win for a tired Pete V.

(D-)

Sam is again on his mic
Sam “Sheik Mustafa is a worried man. Not only is Bruce looking less and less secure with his loss in the Brawl, but the Towers of Power are going to struggle more to hold on to their own titles. In fact, at our next PPV Summer Solstice in 3 weeks time those belts will be defended in a mystery match I’m opening up forums for suggestions for a match stipulation, and the best idea from the public will happen. Before then, it’s time for the Towers to be tested, so tonight, they’re fighting the most exciting tag-team in wrestling, the Fireballs.”

(D+)

The Towers of Power vs. The Fireballs for the tag team titles.
As always the Fireballs aren’t scared of putting their bodies on the line, and Burning Exile in particular stands out as less daring than suicidal. Unfortunately, the Towers are both very big men, and manage to resist the flying attacks pretty well. Danny Rushmore is actually knocked down several times, but Mick Muscles steps up and manages to catch Velocidad off the top rope in one hand. That awesome display of strength leads to a bulldozer powerbomb and the Towers retain the belts.

(E+)

Nicky Champion is in his dressing room with his TV Title belt.

Nicky “Sheik Mustafa and his cronies may have stumbled into some success, but I think we all know what’s going to happen. Now Sam’s on the case, their days are numbered and the company will be all the better for it with some fair competition for everyone. Until then, it looks like I’m the only guy round here with respect for tradition acting like a fighting champ. I’m putting my belt on the line tonight against one of the mot skilled wrestlers around. He may not be the flashiest guy, but I’m not underestimating him. Right now, it’s me head to head with Bryan Holmes”

(D)

Nicky Champion vs. Bryan Holmes for the TV Title
There’s no one trickier than Bryan on the roster, and h shows it by locking up time after time and showing off some of his more innovative reversals. Nicky is clearly not as skilled, but is a born showman and shows off some flashy slams of his own. It Nicky’s flair that is telling eventually and he cons Bryan into shrugging of one hold to set himself up for a Hawkeye Hammer. Nicky retains.

(C-)

Before Joss and Mean Jean’s match, Bruce makes a big show of coming down to ringside to provide guest commentary in his heavy Aussie accent.

Bruce “After the little guy took his own girlfriend out to win the Brawl, it looks like I’m going to have to beat Joss once and for all. Don’t forget, I’ve beaten him before, and to be honest I can’t see me having any trouble doing it again.”

(B-)

Joss Thompson vs. Mean Jean Cattley
Jean I a big guy at 6’5” and not intimidated by Joss’ recent success and the two clearly have issues. Joss looks exhausted, but summons up strength from somewhere. As both men tire and the match reaches its climax, Alicia comes down to ringside and pointedly stands in Joss’ corner. His efforts redouble and as Bruce sledges him on the mic, Joss manages to hit his Clean Cutter for the win.

(D+)

Immediately, Bruce jumps into the ring:
Bruce “You managed another win? Well even a broken clock’s right twice a day Joss. Your little girlfriend came out and you managed to beat the big bad nasty man? I’m disgusted. In fact why don’t you capitalise and com for me now? One on one and we’ll see how you do”

Joss is clearly tempted and starts to square up but Alicia grabs him.

Alicia “Don’t touch him baby. It’s what he wants. Lay a finger on that Aussie caveman and he’ll com out with some legal nonsense about you not getting another shot at him.”
Joss “I’m not falling for this idiot. If he wants to talk, let him. I’ll be doing my own talking soon enough. Sleep with one eye open Bruce.”

(B+)

Overall show: C-

[kislingbury]

USPW Family Night

Week 2 June

Arkansas Coliseum

Attendance: 2,000 sold out

Main show

Sam’ introduction to the show
Sam “It’s that time of the month again ladies and gentlemen. USPW’s biggest night in June will be the New World in a couple of week’s time and things are starting to move. Firstly, I’ve decided to bring some closure to an issue round here. At the New World, Freddie Datsun will be fighting Madman Boone for the last time. Also, I can confirm that all three major USPW belts will be put on the line. Tag titles, US title and USPW championship are all up for grabs.

(B)

Bruce wanders out from backstage to confront Sam.

Sam “Why don’t you shut the hell up ya flaming galah? No-ones interested in anything you’ve got to say, they just want to see the biggest athlete in the world fight: me. And they will tonight. I’ve decided to prove I’m not scared of anyone in USPW; I’m putting my belt on the line fair and square against the number one contender tonight. I’ve already told him about the match, and to make sure that no-one else will get involved, I’ve also banned my mats from ringside.”

Sam “Well son, maybe you’re finally coming round. You know I’m all about standing up for yourself and fighting fair so I’m proud of you. The match I sanctioned so tonight, for the USPW title, it’ll be Bruce the Giant, vs. Joss Thompson”

Bruce “Hold on a mo there old-timer. Who said anything bout Joss? Tonight I’m fighting the hottest name in town Steve Flash. But seeing as you’re so ken for Joss to have a match, I’ve got someone lined up for him too. My old mate from back in Oz, Genghis Rahn.”

(B)

Nicky Champion vs. Madman Boone for the USPW TV Title
Madman comes out swinging here with all his normal swagger. He is clearly looking the stronger of the two, and puts Nicky down a couple of times early. After a particularly spine-jarring backdrop, Madman hits his Boone and Bust and gets Nicky down for 3. But wait! Nicky managed to get his foot onto the rope so the match continues. Unfortunately, madman’s rhythm is ruined, and Nicky forces his way back in. Hawkeye Hammer, and Nicky retains the belt.

(C-)

Anger is seen backstage kneeling in a candlelit room in a pentangle laughing to himself.

(C-)

The Towers of Power vs. Red Hot for the tag-team titles
(Mick Muscles & Danny Rushmore) (Davis Wayne Newton & Des Davids)
Usually, the Towers are just too big and powerful for anyone to live with them, but Des and Davis are pretty great physical specimens themselves. The two teams here are all about smashing big moves, and all 4 men take a punishment. Unfortunately for the Hotties, the Towers also don’t play fair and a standard distract-the-ref and go-for-the-eyes routine gives Mick Muscles the win.

(E+)

Alicia and Joss are talking in the locker-room.

Alicia “I can’t believe this is such a big deal. You saw a chance; there was no danger, so you took it.”
Joss “Hold on, it’s never a good thing to lay hands on a lady, especially not your own girl. I can understand the reaction, but people need to know, I would never hurt you, and when I take Bruce’s belt and get rid of this Emirate, the end will justify the means.”
Alicia “I’m right behind you baby. Go through this Genghis guy tonight and Bruce can’t run forever. Now, I’ve got a match too. Wish me luck.”

(D)

Alicia Strong vs. Mean Jean Cattley
Jean is a big guy, and upset after Alicia’s role in his loss to Joss last week. He’s also clearly on a mission to hurt Alicia not just beat her. As we know though, Alicia is a lot tougher than she looks and absorbs the big hits before managing to lock in her Strong Grip. She repeatedly tells him to pick on someone his own size before he’s finally forced to tap out.

(C-)

Anger is sitting again in his shrine, when the lights suddenly come on. Actually, Anger has been in a broom cupboard all along. James Justice has switched the light and enters.

JJ “Is this the bathroom?”
Anger “Of course it isn’t. This is the lowest pit of hell”
JJ “Really? I always thought hell would b full of tools for housework”
Anger “These aren’t mops. They’re instruments of pain”
JJ “What’s that then? Tears of the innocent?”
Anger “That’s cif. Even Hell must smell lemony fresh”
JJ “You’ve got issues Anger. I’m glad I found you, you’re on my list”
Anger”Of course I am. The list of the eternally damned”
JJ “Well, the eternally pain in the ass at least”
Anger “I shall grant you pain Justice. An eternity of pain!”
JJ “Whatever you say dude. See you in the ring”

(C)

James Justice vs. Anger
Anger is big and painted red, but JJ can actually wrestle. And isn’t 50. Some back and forth, but its clear JJ has the momentum and he hits the Liberation Slam. Win for JJ.

(D)

Bruce is on the mic again
Bruce “Fans of USPW: I know Joss is making all this noise about beating me, but seriously who cares what a little bloke that’s only even got a job by screwing Sam Strong’s little girl thinks? Yeah, he knocked me out of the Brawl, but back in Oz, we don’t go through our Sheilas to get what we want. I’m bored of the whole thing, so tonight, when I beat Flash and Rahn beats Joss, I want this to be over. There’s no-one can beat me, so why don’t you all stop looking and enjoy watching the Emirate whilst you can?”

(B+)

Bruce the Giant vs. Steve Flash for the USPW championship
Flash didn’t expect this at all, and he’s a bit more up than his normal hippy self. For once he doesn’t even have a white Russian on the go. Unfortunately, Bruce is in imperious form and swats away most of Flash’s attacks. He is after all 7 ½ feet tall. However, Flash does get some breaks and even manages to knock Bruce to one knee. It’s a short-lived victory though, and as he comes in to capitalise, Bruce grabs him for the Giant Chokeslam. 123, and Bruce retains.

(D)

Joss Thompson vs. Genghis Rahn
Genghis is a mountain of a man with wild hair and eyes, and even Joss looks a little wary of getting in the ring with him. Of course he fronts up and squares himself and the two men go at it. Genghis is high-impact style and Joss has to use all his skill to stay in the bout, and both men go down a few times. As Joss skips out of his range, Genghis gets more and more enraged and eventually introduces a steel chair to the ring. Two big shots later and Joss is down and bleeding and the bell rings for the DQ. It’s too late though, and as the show ends, Genghis is celebrating over Joss’ prone body.

(C-)

Overall show rating: C-

[kislingbury]

USPW Family Night

Week 3 June 2008

Arkansas Coliseum

Attendance 2,000 – sold out

Preshow

Burning Exile vs. Anger
Anger isn’t really in the running here as Exile uses his speed to keep away from the bigger man. However, it can’t last and anger resorts to a risky head butt move that puts both men down and results in a double KO.


Main show

Sam introduces the show from the boardroom
Sam “Some of you might know that I used to do a bit of wrestling myself. In fact, I was a champion in my day all around the world so I know a bit about how you should behave with a belt. People like Rip Chord might not have been my favourite guys, but I respected them cos they knew how to be a champ. Based on recent weeks, Bruce doesn’t have that same class. I can handle arrogant, but to go through all these games just to avoid fighting someone is worse than that. It’s cowardly. And I’m not the sort of guy that employs cowards. Which is why I’m making a match for Bruce at our upcoming PPV, the New World. I don’t think I need to tell him who he’ll be fighting, but Bruce; you’re going to have a real match on your hands”

(A)

Red Hot are is in their changing room:

Newton “Jacob Jett’s been a thorn in our sides so what you gonna do?”
Des “Win!”
Newton “How ya gonna do it?”
Des “I’m gonna smash that little bitch!”
Newton “Who da man?”
Des “I’m the man!”
Newton “Who’s the best tag team in USPW?”
Des “Red Hot baby!”

Jett pokes his head round the door
Jett “Newton, remember, we were partying whilst you guys were getting all homoerotic and sweaty together. Don’t forget there’s a place for you on our team.”

Des “Red Hot are the best team ever! Des Davids is back on TV!”
Newton “Yeah ok. Good luck with this one Des”

(D)

James Jett vs. Des Davids
Des is much bigger than Jett, but doesn’t have the speed. Also, tellingly Jett is accompanied by his partner Rod Remus whilst Davids is alone. Des makes the early running, but Remus interferes a couple of times to break up pinfalls. After several minutes, Jett gains his first opportunity after a top-rope elbow and Jett secure a pin with the aid of a handful of pants.

(C-)

A promo airs of The Towers of Power (Mick Muscles and Danny Rushmore). It’s pretty much a compilation of enormous slams and tall people frowning but they do look scary.

(C-)

The Towers of Power vs. Patrick Cool and Erik Strong

Pat and new-boy Erik (no relation) are woefully overmatched here and the Towers pick up some more highlight video material before Mick unleashes his bulldozer powerbomb on poor Erik after Pa Cool has run away.

(E+)

Alicia is talking to Sam backstage
Alicia “I think you might have Bruce rattled with that match at New World daddy. We haven’t seen him all night and he knows Joss is on a roll.”
Sam “Maybe you’re right. Maybe the coward is finally showing his true spots.”
Alicia “Count on it. And if he’s not here, how about that match you promised me?”
Sam “Anything for my little girl. Tonight, you get your shot at Bryan Holmes, but meanwhile, it’s on with the show with some of our big names. Your uncle Pete has asked for a solo match tonight. Against Freddie Datsun.”

(D+)

Pete Valentine vs. Freddie Datsun
Obviously, Freddie seems the more dangerous guy, with Pete dressed as a lounge-lizard, but the Heartbreaker is a deceptively powerful brawler and these two are pretty equal with both getting in fair offence. The turning point is Cherry Bomb arriving at ringside. She doesn’t get involved, but Freddie has to account for her and leaves Pete an opening he doesn’t miss. Heartbreaker - 123. Shock win for Pete.

(C-)

Alicia Strong vs. Bryan Holmes
We have seen Bryan show off his technical skill before, but Alicia is also extremely accomplished in the expert arts and these two put together a match full of obscure holds/reversals and intricate footwork. Unfortunately for Bryan, Alicia is the more motivated and hits the Strong Arm Technique to lay Bryan out before pinning him.

(C)

Joss and Sam both come out to congratulate Alicia on her win.
Sam “Folks, my daughter is as good a fighter as any man in USPW, and I’m not afraid to say it. Sheik Mustafa has been lording it up with the USPW and tag-belts, but I think we’re in a great position to start winning some silverware.”
Joss “Well done baby, I knew you could do it. Now we’re definitely top dogs round here.”
Alicia “No doubt boys. After the New World, I think we can expect to see some new chaps in USPW, and there’s nothing Bruce is going to be able to do about it.”

(B)

Bruce comes out with Sheik Mustafa and the Towers of Power with a mic.
Bruce “Hold on there now guys. Last I saw, not one of you could beat me one-on-one.”
Sheik “And the Towers are destroying anyone in front of them.”
Bruce “And Genghis beat the hell out of you last week. Actually, turns out you lot are getting a bit ahead of yourselves.”
Joss “The hell with that! Bruce, I can beat you and I’m not scared.”
Bruce “No-one said you were mate. In fact, are you telling me you’ll fight anyone in USPW?”
Joss “Damn straight. I can take any one of you cowards down!”
Bruce “And you’ll fight right here and now?”
Joss “Bring it sasquatch.”
Bruce “alright mate. You got it. Joss Thompson vs. Genghis Rahn. Ring the bell.”

Of course Joss can’t back down, so Sam gives the nod and its match time.

(A)

Genghis Rahn vs. Joss Thompson
Joss I obviously wary after Genghis took him down savagely with a chair last week, but grows with confidence at the sight of Alicia and Sam in his corner. Genghis is his normal half-animal Wildman though, and comes out all guns blazing. The match storm back and forth but having to fight within the rules, Joss gradually gains the upper hand and manages to lock in an ankle lock on Genghis. Which is when Bruce storms the ring and the bell rings to DQ Genghis.

(C-)

Obviously everyone gets involved then, and a mass brawl erupts between Joss, Sam and Alicia and Bruce, Genghis and the Towers. The Emirate are doing well but Nicky Champion enters the fray to even the odds. Both sides separate and Joss seizes a mic.
Joss “The hell with this! I can beat any of you in a fair fight and one of these days I’ll get it. In fact, with my prize of being Commissioner for a night, I can get whatever I want. Meanwhile, Sam, you better find someone else to fight Bruce at New World, cos I know what I want. Genghis Rahn one on one. And to make sure it’s just me and him, make it a cage match.”

(B)

The show ends with the commentators wondering who will fight Bruce in the title match at this week’s New World PPV.

Overall show rating - C-

[kislingbury]

Sam “Not such a bad show there son. We’re finally getting a bit of consistency at least.”

Me “Thanks boss. I’m especially pleased with the undercard. Jett and Des getting a C-? Pete Valentine getting a C?”

Sam “Son, rein it in. If those guys are getting Cs, shouldn’t Joss, Bruce etc be getting a lot better?”

Me “Errrm…”

Sam “I like you son, but you got to squeeze. And starting this weekend at the New World, I’m looking for better. Genghis will be making his last appearance, and our mystery loan guy will be there too. With that talent, I want a result. Got it?

Me “Whatever you say boss. Did I tell you how much Alicia is coming long? That girl’s going to be a star…”

[kislingbury]

The New World

Saturday, Week 3 June 2008

Arkansas Coliseum

Attendance: 2,000 – sold out

Preshow

Davis Wayne Newton vs. Tribal Warrior
Tribal Warrior looks a shadow of the man he once was and DWN lets him know it with a dominant performance.

(E+)

Bryan Holmes and the Dirty White Boys vs. James Justice and The Fireballs
JJ is clearly the class here, but he didn’t manage to take account of the DWB's secret special tactic: Teaming up when the ref wasn’t watching. Bryan pins Burning Exile for the win.

(D)

Main show

Sam is set up in the ring
Sam "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to The New World. Tonight you're going to see some of the finest athletes in the world go head to head, and with any luck a new USPW champ. As everyone knows, I had lined my daughter’s man up for a title shot tonight against Bruce the Giant, the biggest fighter in wrestling, but he has decided to settle a score with another man: Genghis Rahn. I will never criticise a man for standing up for what he believes in but it does leave me a man short. So I've called in a favour. Everyone in this industry wants a shot at the USPW title, and to prove it, Bruce will be fighting one of the biggest names around. And Bruce? I don’t think you can win."

(B+)

The Hillbillies and Giant Redwood are in their log cabin in the carpark. Redwood is clearly sloshed on moonshine.
Pete HB "Hot dang boy! Get thar monster cleaned up for titlin’!”
Al HB “Him rare sore brer. Towers mighty scerred of secret plannin’”
Pete HB “Yarp”
Al HB “Reckon”
Redwood “Take me home - to the place where I belong! Mountain Momma, In my home far away. Yesterday!”

(D-)

They manage to help redwood to his feet and we are again reminded of his awesome size as the old mountain monster flexes and roars.

(C-)

The Towers of Power vs. the Hillbillies with Giant Redwood for the tag titles
This is a slugfest, but the underrated Hillbillies are actually holding their own as they are of course 2 very big men fighting two very big men. With a bottle of liquor in them. Unfortunately, as they start to gain the upper hand their ‘secret plan’ is sprung and a smashed Redwood clears house in the ring taking all four men out. In his drunken idiocy, he actually knocks Pete out cold and Mick Muscles picks up an easy win on the prone, but legal man.

(E)

Anger is seen again backstage holding another black mass in the style of a desperate teenager. Black candles, dim lighting and a big spider are all here, but its as scary as a Jessica Fletcher storyline. Anger gets to his feet and makes his way to the ring.

(C-)

Nicky Champion vs. Anger for the USPW TV Title
Anger is a visibly tiring chap by now, and Nicky is leagues ahead in terms of fitness, physical ability and guile. Anger is still a big, strong guy (he’s a demon!) but he just cant grab hold of Nicky for long. Hawkeye Hammer. 3 count. Champion retains.

(D-)

Sam, Alicia and Joss all com out to congratulate Nicky on his success
Sam “This is what happens when someone shows the Strong family friendship and loyalty. Everyone knows that Nicky is a stand-up kid, and guess what? He’s wearing gold”
Alicia “It’s a nice change to have someone round here rewarded for being fair and working hard. Well done Nicky”
Joss “Nicky, you’re like a brother to me. I hope I can live up to your example by winning tonight”
Sam “See that Sheik? Bruce? We’re on a roll now, and once we get going, no one can stop the Strongs. Enjoy that belt whilst you can”

(B-)

Alicia Strong vs. T-Rex
T-Rex manages to slam Alicia a few times, but she again shows her boggling ability in technical terms. Alicia impresses by kicking out of a couple of very, very close two counts and a brawler like T-Rex cant keep going all night. Alicia turns a Jurassic Crush into a finger-lock and T-Rex taps out to a girl.

(D+)

Madman Boone is in his dressing room warming up. By beating up Velocidad. Poor Velocidad is trying to crawl away, but Madman is showing his savage side and bullies the little guy mercilessly.

Madman “See this Freddie? This is what I think of little people. In our match tonight, Im going to beat you down for the last time by making sure you cant walk away. Our match will be won by the Last Man Standing.”

(C)

Madman Boone vs. Freddie Datsun
It’s no surprise for anyone that this isn’t a straight fight. Madman has little regard for things like rules, and Freddie is the American Everyman with a weakness for chairs. Both guys take obscene punishment, but it’s Madman that does the worst by taking a barbed wire bat to Freddie’s face. Blood everywhere, but Freddie fights on. Until Madman hits the Boone-and-Bust onto said wired chair. And Freddie cant quite get up. Win for Madman.

(E-)

Joss comes to the ring alone with a mic.
Joss “Genghis, we’ve gone head-to-head twice now and both times you’ve acted like a coward. I had you beat both times, and you’ve wriggled out if it by taking a steel chair to my head, and getting that oversized relic Bruce to fight me for you. I know you’re going to try something again tonight in the steel cage, but you know what? I don’t care. I will never stoop to your level, and never rely on someone else to fight my battles so I’m here, alone ready for you. Are you man enough?”

(C)

Joss Thompson vs. Genghis Rahn in a cage match
Genghis surprisingly comes out alone and both men are locked into the cage. Joss is riled and goes out strong, but Rahn is a monster and gives as good as he gets. In fact better, as Joss takes a few blows too many on his already injured frame. Genghis lines the smaller man up for 3 powerbombs in total but Joss keeps getting up again. Both men are hurt when Rahn hits a top-rope elbow, and Bruce’s face appears on the big screen.

Bruce “Is that it mate? Seriously, my old nan could do better. For a guy that think he should have my belt, you’ve got a long way to go.”

Genghis takes this as a cue to redouble the beating and Joss looks down. Until Sam appears on the screen.

Sam “Joss, Alicia wanted to be here, but I know you wont want your girl to get involved. Just remember I see you a Strong now, and Strongs don’t get beat”

Joss of course is revitalised with this long-awaited affirmation and its one way traffic. Rahn clearly doesn’t expect such strength after their previous encounters and the big guy looks shocked as Joss puts him down. One Clean-cutter later and it’s a clean win for Joss.

(C)

Sam comes out with his mic
Sam “I think that showed everyone what my boy Joss is like. And now we’re going to see what someone else is like. With Joss having business to take care of, I combed high and low for a suitable opponent for Bruce. He may be a sad, desperate piece of work, but he’s not to be taken lightly. I’m delighted to say that one of wrestling’s top names has risen to the challenge, and fighting here and now for the USPW title, is Superstar Sammy Bach.”

A video starts to play showing Sammy’s career. He was of course a name is USPW before he moved to DAVE where he blazed a trail that took him to international fame with TCW. Rest assured, he’s a top draw with rock-star attitude and looks.

(B-)

Bruce vs. Sammy Bach for the USPW title
Sammy looks high class in the ring and Bruce clearly has a ton of respect for him. The two men both clearly have the ability to hurt each other and several times we see one man almost pinned. In fact, Sammy manages to hit his Bach With A Vengeance (missile dropkick) and the referee counts to 3. But Sheik Mustafa protests and he was right o as Bruce’s foot was on the rope. The two men redouble their efforts, and Bruce manages to lock on his Giant Chokeslam and scarcely escape with a very hard-fought win. Bruce retains the title.

(B-)

After the match, a bloodied and exhausted Bruce takes the mic.
Bruce “Is that the best you can do? Is that all you got Sam? You bring anyone you want, and I’ll be the one wearing this belt still. Bring everybody and I’ll be waiting.”

(A)

Joss steps out from backstage
Joss “Keep smiling jackass. Cos at Summer Solstice in July, I’m cashing in my Brawl win to be commissioner for the night. And I want two things: that title and you lying broken on the floor. And you’d better be ready, cos I’m not in the mood to take no for an answer.”

(B+)

Overall rating - B-

[condors]

good show

[kislingbury]

Me “So boss, the fans seem pretty happy for once. That was our best ever show, it featured our best ever match and we’re really building some momentum for our top guys”

Sam “Great work son. But any sumbitch could throw big names at an event and come up smelling of roses. Lets see how you follow that up leading into Summer Solstice in July”

Me “Well, we already know that Joss and Bruce will be together again in the ring, so I’m assuming almost as good a show at least”

Sam “You know what happens when you assume don’t you? Your big nasty boss gets pissed and sacks your ass. Good show, but I want them to stay good. And I want some of our stars looking better. Nicky needs to be doing more, Alicia should be a star already, and dammit! I told you to get Pete V on top.”

Me “OK boss. I’ve got an idea that will help you out with those things…”

[kislingbury]

Originally Posted by condors

good show

Thanks very much sir. Im trying my hardest to get my head around the scale of this game, but theres a lot that can go wrong...

[kislingbury]

USPW American Wrestling
Week 4 June
Arkansas Coliseum
Attendance 2,000 – sold out


Pre-show

Freddie Datsun vs. Cal Sanders
Freddie teaches Cal a lesson.

(D-)

Peter Valentine vs. Davis Wayne Newton
Pete cheats his way to the win

(C-)

Main show

Sam is in the ring with his mic in hand.
Sam “Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls – a heartfelt thank you for making last week’s A New World such a great event. Everyone that came to see it saw something they’ll never forget as we have come to expect in USPW.
“The big news is that although my daughter’s man Joss Thompson waived his title shot, we will all get to see him take his chance at July’s PPV Summer Solstice after he announced his intention to cash in his chance to be commissioner for a night that he won at the Brawl.
“What is he planning? We don’t know yet, but judging on their history, Sheik Mustafa and his Emirate won’t be in for an enjoyable evening.
“We’ll get our first idea of his plans tonight when he faces off against Bryan Holmes.”

(A)

The Demon Anger is in his darkened broom cupboard (complete with his usual candles etc) with an old-fashioned record-player and assorted Slipknot records. He’s manually trying to turn the needle backwards but only hearing garbled junk instead of terrifying subliminal messages. Anger looks disappointed and leaves heading for the ring.

(C-)

Anger vs. James Justice
JJ looks in inspired form and makes short work of the Demon before hitting his Liberation Slam and picking up the 3 count.

(D)

JJ grabs a mic and brandishes what appears to be a large legal periodical.
JJ “That was just a demonstration. A statement that although I’ve lost my way and been dragged down by gnarly cheaters I’m back and I’m looking out for the weak, the poor and the totally righteous victims. If you got a problem yo: I’ll solve it. Check out my book and I’ll help you resolve it. Who you gonna call?”

(C-)

We are shown a video of Burning Exile’s training regime. It appears to consist of him jumping off of things using a small parachute. That dude is X-TREME.

(E-)

Burning Exile vs. Pat Cool
These two guys have loads of energy and get around the ring super-fast. Exile also has some decent moves as well and manages a 450 splash to put Cool down for the count.

(E)

The Dirty White Boys are sitting in a bar smoking and looking tough. Someone tries to squeeze past their table and Grease Hogg casually trips him up so he drops his tray of beers. The DWBs snigger to themselves.

(D)

The Dirty White Boys vs. The Hillbillies
The DWBs are in a typical brawling mood and this match turns into a pretty dirty street fight. The Hillbillies are on their own but are continually looking to the backstage entrance as though they are expecting a large, monster to assist them. However, nothing happens, and when the DWBs start to incorporate some technical skills into their offence, Al the Hillbilly goes down in a heap. Win for Leadbelly.

(E+)

As the DWBs celebrate after the match a reeling Giant redwood staggers down to the ring where the Hillbillies are trying to get back up. The Hillbillies aren’t happy with him and its clear he was supposed t arrive in time to help out.

(D-)

Alicia is taping up her hands in her dressing room whilst talking to someone off-camera.
Alicia “I need to show the Emirate tonight that I can fight them one-on-one. I may have lost to Bruce before and they may have assaulted me, but put me in the ring with one of the Towers of Power and I’ll show them what a girl can do. Mick Muscles is heading for trouble over the next few weeks.”

Her companion steps into shot.

Joss “I can almost guarantee that.”

(C)

Alicia vs. Mick Muscles (with Danny Rushmore)
Alicia looks good here but Mick is not to be underestimated. Especially as Danny is on hand to break up a couple of holds from Alicia. In fact, after interference from Rushmore Mick is set up to hit his Bulldozer Powerbomb, but Joss sprints down to make the save. With both Towers looking scared, Joss could force the issue, but he and Alicia allow Mick back to fight fairly. With momentum swinging her way, Alicia redoubles her efforts and manages to hit a Strong Arm Tactic to set her up for the win fair and square.

(C-)

With the Towers looking down and Alicia celebrating Bruce steps out.
Bruce “Lads, I gave you guys a chance here to send that Sheila back home. I’ve shown you she isn’t all that no matter who her daddy is, and I expected more. In fact I expect a lot more. Just to let you know, I’m watching you over the next few weeks and I expect results. Or I’ll find someone else.”

(B+)

Joss Thompson vs. Bryan Holmes
Bryan is a slippery customer, and although he doesn’t say much, knows as much about wrestling as anyone on the roster. Joss is accomplished too though, and this is a remarkably advanced match for our crowd. As a result of the style it’s hard for either man to make headway, and it’s a back and forth 20 minutes before Joss gets the upper hand when he flips Bryan out of the ring. After that it’s strength to strength and Joss manages to hit his Clean Cutter for the win.

(C)

Immediately after, Joss takes the mic:
Joss “I know people have been wondering but I’m confirming here and now that this is my month. I’ll be acting commissioner at Summer solstice in July and as my first act, I’m making a title shot. Bruce vs. me for the USPW title. Bruce: There’s nothing you can do to avoid this and I owe you. Not just for me but for Alicia, Sam, Nicky and all the others that have stood up for me and against your sexist, prejudiced, old-fashioned ways. At Summer Solstice I’m the future and you’re the past!”

(B-)

Overall rating - C

[kislingbury]

Just wantd to do a quick rundown of who's who so all the roster members are defined...

Sam Strong
Legendary ex superstar wrestler. USPW owner and commissioner.

Alicia Strong
Sam’s daughter and young fighter. Trained well from birth in the biz, and now finding her feet as a performer. Paramour of…

Joss Thompson
Alicia’s boyfriend and now accepted as part of the family by Sam. Clean-cut, above-board type with an old-school look and liberal attitude. Spent a couple of years in England.

James Justice
The ex-USW champ is a bizarre cross between a lawyer and a surfer with a penchant for late-80s early-90s references. History of clashes with Madman Boone, Bryan Holmes and the Dirty White Boys.

Freddy Datsun
The Everyman American is a small-town, guy-next-door type. With a hardcore background. Generally sticks up for the downtrodden and bullied and thus has issues with Madman.

Bruce the Giant
Hugely popular 7 foot Australian bruiser. Has a firm grip on the title and outspoken beliefs on women. All in all, he’s a bit of an egotist and a bigot.

Sheik Mustafa
Arab manager in charge of the loose “Emirate” stable (Bruce, the Towers of Power and sometimes Bryan and Madman).

Madman Boone
Madman is a big, nasty bully with a vicious streak. He generally enjoys acting like an arsehole just for the fun of it and has little loyalty or friendship to anyone. He has a hardcore streak too.

Bryan Holmes
Hired muscle that tends to side with whoever offers the best deal at any time. He’s good in a fight, but has little or no charisma.

Pete Valentine
One of Sam’s best mates, and Alicia treats him as an uncle, Pete I actually a dirty old man who tends to take his inspiration from Hugh Hefner. He can punch with the best of them, but has little wrestling skill.

Nicky Champion
Sam Strong’s protégé and thus marked for greatness, Nicky has Native American roots and tends to be very loyal to the Strongs and Sam in particular.

Steve Flash
A slightly older chap with a bit of fame, Steve is a leftover hippy and tends to act a bit Big Lebowski-ish. Good all-round performer in the ring, but a little lost outside.

The Towers of Power (Mick Muscles and Danny Rushmore
Our tag champs are essentially enormous monster heels who cheat a lot and bungle more. They’re core members of Sheik Mustafa’s Emirate and are similarly old-fashioned. Mick is younger and more talented.

Giant Redwood
As his name suggests, Redwood is a monster of an old man from the mountains. He is currently in thrall to the Hillbillies who have him addicted to their home-made moonshine. He’s an old friend of Sam’s but a poisonous backroom presence…

Anger
Another old man with a scary demon gimmick. Used to be a name, but now appears to be losing more and more…

T-Rex
Another monster heel, T-Rex is obsessed with his collection of dinosaur books and toys and really wants to be one himself. Much younger than some, but that does not necessarily translate into potential.

Cherry Bomb
Our top girl that isn’t Alicia. Cherry is a feisty redhead who can brawl with guys and rock the mic. Currently spending a lot of time with Pete Valentine…

The Dirty White Boys (Leadbelly & Grease Hogg)
A couple of bikers who tend to act like they own the world. They’ve had some success in other companies and are both technically quite good.

Red Hot (Des Davids and Davis Wayne Newton)
Des is an ex-football star with a bucketload of potential, Davis is the same without the football background. Both are typical sports-nuts who could really breakout but have a lot to learn.

The Forces of America (Jim Force and Capt USA)
Jim is…Jim. Think a friendly but less stable Ultimate Warrior. Capt USA is a faded patriot with little upside.

Jacob Jett
A young high flier who is renowned for partying every night. Lots of potential.

Roderick Remus
Best pals with Jett, but not only can he not hack the lifestyle (and is thus always exhausted), he’s just not cool enough to get close and doesn’t have the in-ring talent either.

Tribal Warrior
Big, fat savage islander fighter.

Burning Exile
Masked and enigmatic Japanese high-flyer. All the talent in the world, but in known in the US and cant speak English. Is an extreme sports nut.

Patrick Cool
Nicky Champions best pal, but uninspiring as a typical floor-level heel.

Cal Sanders
This sounds weird, but Cal is basically a mean lumberjack. In some ways the opposite of Freddy Datsun. But with non of the talent, upside or draw.

Velocidad
Masked Mexican who hangs around with and sometimes teams with Burning Exile. Talented but unpolished high-flyer.

UK Dragon
Typical English gent with perfect manners. In a weird Union Jack horned mask.

Jaime Quine
Very talented young lady with looks and in-ring ability. Currently searching for her father whom hr mother claims was ‘some wrestler’ from back in the day. Is currently spending time with Steve Flash and Pete Valentine.

Geena The Warrior Princess
Wild warrior woman in a furry bikini. Ratings gold.