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Old 07-15-2010, 02:17 PM   #951
SackAttack
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ISiddiqui View Post
THIS!!

I'm somewhat peeved I'm supposed to do this. I find it highly mysogynistic.

Funny thing was originally the girlfriend didn't want me to ask because she wanted it to be a surprised, and she's very good at picking up differences in body language and stuff to figure out what's going on. But then there was this grumbling about the dad wanted to be asked and here I am... grumble.

Some of it is tradition, some of it is respect, and some of it is the dad wanting to not be shut out of what's essentially the biggest decision his daughter's going to make.

I think the first two are kinda intertwined. Tradition in that, likely her father had to ask his wife's father for permission, and now kind of has that same expectation that his daughter's suitor will ask him. If said suitor doesn't, it's a breach of tradition, perhaps, but depending on the man might also be taken as a slap in the face. "I don't respect your judgment enough to put myself out there and get your blessing to join your family to mine."

Not every father is going to react that way to not being asked for his daughter's hand, but some will, and I think that's why the tradition persists more than anything else.
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Old 07-15-2010, 06:30 PM   #952
terpkristin
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Originally Posted by Tigercat View Post
Four girls I dated seriously in the past have gotten married just in this year. This week a girl I worked with and thought I had chemistry with announced she was engaged to a long distance boyfriend no one knew about. I am starting to get worried that I have the magic touch that turns all women I know into married women.

Wanna date?



Sadly, now that my younger brother is married with a kid, and my younger sister is engaged, I'm starting to feel like an old maid.

/tk
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Old 07-15-2010, 06:35 PM   #953
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Originally Posted by sabotai View Post
Am I the only one that thinks asking a father for permission to ask their daughter for her hand in marriage is really weird? People still do that? Seems pretty archaic to me.

It's called respect. I was a big boy and did it, my father in law appreciated it. I guess it all depends on the relationship that your future wife has with her father.
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Old 07-15-2010, 06:36 PM   #954
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Originally Posted by stevew View Post
approach the situation like you are curious what the dowry for taking his daughter off of his hands is.

GOLD!
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Old 07-15-2010, 06:37 PM   #955
cuervo72
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GOLD!

Pfft, nobody keeps gold on-hand these days.
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Old 07-15-2010, 06:38 PM   #956
DanGarion
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Originally Posted by Tigercat View Post
Four girls I dated seriously in the past have gotten married just in this year. This week a girl I worked with and thought I had chemistry with announced she was engaged to a long distance boyfriend no one knew about. I am starting to get worried that I have the magic touch that turns all women I know into married women.

Wasn't this the premise for a movie?
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Old 07-15-2010, 06:40 PM   #957
DanGarion
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Originally Posted by Swaggs View Post
Everytime I see someone of facebook that has a joint account with their spouse, it makes me wonder what kind of maritial trouble they have.

Is that wrong?

Who the hell would have a joint account with their wife. WTF.
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Old 07-15-2010, 06:43 PM   #958
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Although if I ever did stumble into a quirky, good hearted Jessica Alba lookalike, I could probably stuff...

I was totally expecting you to say something else.
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Old 07-15-2010, 06:55 PM   #959
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Originally Posted by terpkristin View Post
Wanna date?



Sadly, now that my younger brother is married with a kid, and my younger sister is engaged, I'm starting to feel like an old maid.

/tk

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Old 07-15-2010, 06:56 PM   #960
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Originally Posted by SackAttack View Post
Some of it is tradition, some of it is respect, and some of it is the dad wanting to not be shut out of what's essentially the biggest decision his daughter's going to make.

I think the first two are kinda intertwined. Tradition in that, likely her father had to ask his wife's father for permission, and now kind of has that same expectation that his daughter's suitor will ask him. If said suitor doesn't, it's a breach of tradition, perhaps, but depending on the man might also be taken as a slap in the face. "I don't respect your judgment enough to put myself out there and get your blessing to join your family to mine."

Not every father is going to react that way to not being asked for his daughter's hand, but some will, and I think that's why the tradition persists more than anything else.

My sister's fiancee called my dad to ask for her hand in marriage. My dad thought it was kind of weird, but I know it meant something to my sister. Would to me, too, to be honest.

/tk
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Old 07-15-2010, 07:06 PM   #961
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Originally Posted by DanGarion View Post
Who the hell would have a joint account with their wife. WTF.

I have at least two "friends" that have them and someone else was suggested to me. It makes me wonder if they just don't trust each other or what.
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Old 07-15-2010, 07:58 PM   #962
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I'm getting married in a week, and I have yet to feel nervous or stressed about the situation at all. Is that a sign I am actually more than ready or is it something else?

BTW, about asking the father-in-law for permission, I didn't for two good reasons. One, he is Korean and speaks zero English, and I speak very poor Korean at best. Two, my soon-to-be-wife is Korean and the tradition here is that you do not meet the in-laws until after you are engaged. I met my future in-laws for the first time about two-and-a-half months after our engagement.
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Old 07-16-2010, 10:58 AM   #963
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Originally Posted by StLee View Post
I'm getting married in a week, and I have yet to feel nervous or stressed about the situation at all. Is that a sign I am actually more than ready or is it something else?

BTW, about asking the father-in-law for permission, I didn't for two good reasons. One, he is Korean and speaks zero English, and I speak very poor Korean at best. Two, my soon-to-be-wife is Korean and the tradition here is that you do not meet the in-laws until after you are engaged. I met my future in-laws for the first time about two-and-a-half months after our engagement.

Nah, you're alright. It's about 6 years into it when you start to feel the dread starting to creep in.
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Old 07-16-2010, 11:17 AM   #965
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Originally Posted by ISiddiqui View Post
THIS!!

I'm somewhat peeved I'm supposed to do this. I find it highly mysogynistic.

Funny thing was originally the girlfriend didn't want me to ask because she wanted it to be a surprised, and she's very good at picking up differences in body language and stuff to figure out what's going on. But then there was this grumbling about the dad wanted to be asked and here I am... grumble.
I remember when the Bush girl got married, and we were discussing this, and my uncle said if anyone ever asks the answer is no, because anyone stupid enough to ask didnt deserve his daughter. its a moot point since she gay... but still!
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Old 07-16-2010, 11:19 AM   #966
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when the earthquake hit this AM, I thought a tree had fallen on my house. I am very paranoid about this... next time i buy a house, there will be NO trees over 5 ft!
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Old 07-16-2010, 11:23 AM   #967
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I have at least two "friends" that have them and someone else was suggested to me. It makes me wonder if they just don't trust each other or what.

The few I've seen seem to be so out of touch with technology that they think of it as a family/couple "website" of sorts and don't really get the point. Or, one of them cares enough to get the account and the other cares enough to only expect to be included, but doesn't want their own because they'll never check it.
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Old 07-16-2010, 11:41 AM   #968
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The few I've seen seem to be so out of touch with technology that they think of it as a family/couple "website" of sorts and don't really get the point. Or, one of them cares enough to get the account and the other cares enough to only expect to be included, but doesn't want their own because they'll never check it.

Forget that, I still know couples who share an e-mail account! Very weird.
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Old 07-16-2010, 11:42 AM   #969
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and don't really get the point.

There is a point to facebook?
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Old 07-16-2010, 11:44 AM   #970
terpkristin
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Originally Posted by claphamsa View Post
when the earthquake hit this AM, I thought a tree had fallen on my house. I am very paranoid about this... next time i buy a house, there will be NO trees over 5 ft!

To me, it felt like a MASSIVE wind wall blowing by my house...until I felt the townhouse adjacent to mine also shake.

/tk
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Old 07-16-2010, 11:53 AM   #971
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I think an earthquake in Washington DC is the last thing to worry about happening in that town.
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Old 07-16-2010, 12:09 PM   #972
Ksyrup
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Forget that, I still know couples who share an e-mail account! Very weird.

Actually, we do. My wife got a separate email solely for facebook, and the only thing that goes in there are FB notifications. Neither of us has conversations on email that need to be hidden or separated. We just don't lead separate lives to that extent. Although, she texts with friends, but that's obviously not email (and I would probably insist she use her FB email if I had to wade through that crap in our in-box). We have one family email (at least until the girls get older).
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Old 07-16-2010, 12:11 PM   #973
Ksyrup
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There is a point to facebook?

Not much of one from what I can see, but at least for personal accounts, it's for individuals.
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Old 07-16-2010, 12:26 PM   #974
Autumn
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Actually, we do. My wife got a separate email solely for facebook, and the only thing that goes in there are FB notifications. Neither of us has conversations on email that need to be hidden or separated. We just don't lead separate lives to that extent. Although, she texts with friends, but that's obviously not email (and I would probably insist she use her FB email if I had to wade through that crap in our in-box). We have one family email (at least until the girls get older).

That is just so foreign to me. Both for work and personally I use e-mail all day long. My wife does too, and I just can't imagine having to wade through twice as much. I know a lot of people still don't use e-mail much, to the point that they check once a week or something. I check mine constantly, so it's just surreal to me.
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Old 07-16-2010, 12:36 PM   #975
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I know a lot of people still don't use e-mail much, to the point that they check once a week or something

Now that's just crazy!!! Though I know people like that too..
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Old 07-16-2010, 12:37 PM   #976
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That is just so foreign to me. Both for work and personally I use e-mail all day long. My wife does too, and I just can't imagine having to wade through twice as much. I know a lot of people still don't use e-mail much, to the point that they check once a week or something. I check mine constantly, so it's just surreal to me.

I have a separate work email, but our personal email is 75% ads and crap neither of us solicit. We don't really communicate with people by email exclusively, and the main people I communicate with during the day are through my work email. I check my email constantly (it's set up to alert me on my BB whenever a new personal email hits the server), but it's not like my wife is emailing back and forth with a bunch of friends and I can't get to my stuff. She maybe gets 1-2 emails a day, if that, and I get a few more because I'm coaching softball, but then she wants to see those because that's family-related, anyway.

I guess I'd agree with you if we were both generating dozens of email conversations a day with separate people, but we don't. It's mostly best buy ads and the like.
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Old 07-16-2010, 04:19 PM   #977
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Logging into facebook this afternoon I was greeted with the "people you may know" or whatever it was called. I certainly knew the person they were suggesting: William Barrett Kerchee, my best friend who passed away just over three years ago.

I clicked the link, and found he had just one friend listed. I messaged this friend and asked if he had just set up this page as a memorial of some sort.

He responded that Will had created the page the day he died.

Three and half years later and I still hate that he's gone.
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Old 07-16-2010, 05:04 PM   #978
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Wow. That's horrible Poli. I still remember when you shared that story with all of us. Rugged. I feel for you.
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Old 07-16-2010, 05:15 PM   #979
sabotai
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I generally check my email once a day, but most days it's just to clear out a dozen or two new emails that I have no intention of reading (spam, website newsletters, etc.)
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Old 07-16-2010, 05:23 PM   #980
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There is a point to facebook?

Divorce Attorneys love Facebook
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Old 07-16-2010, 06:19 PM   #981
JediKooter
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Originally Posted by Poli View Post
Logging into facebook this afternoon I was greeted with the "people you may know" or whatever it was called. I certainly knew the person they were suggesting: William Barrett Kerchee, my best friend who passed away just over three years ago.

I clicked the link, and found he had just one friend listed. I messaged this friend and asked if he had just set up this page as a memorial of some sort.

He responded that Will had created the page the day he died.

Three and half years later and I still hate that he's gone.

Damn. I'm sorry Poli and I don't think there's anything wrong with hating that he is gone. Perfectly natural and there's no time limit on how long you should or shouldn't.
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Old 07-17-2010, 02:33 PM   #982
Poli
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Old 07-18-2010, 09:58 AM   #983
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approach the situation like you are curious what the dowry for taking his daughter off of his hands is.

Awesome!

SI
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Old 07-18-2010, 10:01 AM   #984
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Pfft, nobody keeps gold on-hand these days.

Yeah, everyone sells it to MC Hammer, the late Ed McMahon, or Glen Beck if commercials are to be believed

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Last edited by sterlingice : 07-18-2010 at 10:02 AM.
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Old 07-18-2010, 10:02 AM   #985
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A fox just pooped in my yard. In the last 2-3 weeks I've seen a family of groundhogs go wandering by, a beaver and an opossum get into a brawl, a hawk attacking squirrels, deer eating from all 3 bird feeders at once, and now a fox pooping in the yard. I live in the freaking suburbs...this is ridiculous.

Honestly, these are the type of posts that make me love this thread

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Old 07-18-2010, 10:07 AM   #986
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I'm getting married in a week, and I have yet to feel nervous or stressed about the situation at all. Is that a sign I am actually more than ready or is it something else?

BTW, about asking the father-in-law for permission, I didn't for two good reasons. One, he is Korean and speaks zero English, and I speak very poor Korean at best. Two, my soon-to-be-wife is Korean and the tradition here is that you do not meet the in-laws until after you are engaged. I met my future in-laws for the first time about two-and-a-half months after our engagement.

I was stressed for about 1 minute total before getting married. There was this minute right before the service started where I was struck particularly hard with the gravity of the situation right when the processional music started but, frankly, I got over it and we're about to hit 5 years next week. Then again, we had also been going out for about 5 years before getting married so I knew what I was getting into.

Tangentially- I wonder about people who don't live together for at least a little time before marriage. Those always seem to be the ones who really dwell on how awful/hard marriage is and I think it's because those first few months you move in together, it's just kindof constant fighting for territory and space with the real bonus of you guys not having worked out how your problem solving methodology so it's a double whammy. If that's your first impression of marriage, I can understand the disdain.

SI
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Old 07-18-2010, 11:13 PM   #987
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Anyways, as a follow up, asked the dad for his blessing. He said yes within 2 minutes, surprisingly, and then just chatted with me asking questions / giving advice and then we ended it by him praying over our union and whatnot.

So not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. Hooray!
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Old 07-19-2010, 08:50 AM   #988
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and then we ended it by him praying over our union and whatnot.

Worst Icebreaker Ever: When he starts praying, you say "Hey, maybe we should make this prayer really powerful and sacrifice a virgin to your God." Then, when he looks horrified and/or confused, you come out with "hey, don't worry. Your daughter's safe; no chance that she'll be sacrificed."

In-laws LOVE jokes. Trust me.

On a more serious note, congratulations on the upcoming marriage.
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Old 07-19-2010, 12:07 PM   #989
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Old 07-19-2010, 03:27 PM   #990
M GO BLUE!!!
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Gold spandex should not come in size XXL.
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Old 07-19-2010, 03:31 PM   #991
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Old 07-19-2010, 03:37 PM   #992
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Gold spandex should not come in size XXL.

But then they'd just try to fit into size XL and we'd have ripped pants everywhere dude.
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Old 07-19-2010, 05:04 PM   #993
DaddyTorgo
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Anyways, as a follow up, asked the dad for his blessing. He said yes within 2 minutes, surprisingly, and then just chatted with me asking questions / giving advice and then we ended it by him praying over our union and whatnot.

So not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. Hooray!

Congrats!!!
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Old 07-19-2010, 08:43 PM   #994
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Playboy should make an offer to Christina Hendricks to pose for the magazine, but should do it semi-in character with her role on Mad Men. Meaning, approach the shoot as they would have in the early 1960s. Match the lighting, the poses, the decor. Playboy showed a lot less back then, so it might even be agreeable to her.

Well, not far off I guess:

'Mad Men' star Crista Flanagan to pose in August edition of Playboy in recreation of '60s shoots

Read more: 'Mad Men' star Crista Flanagan to pose in August edition of Playboy in recreation of '60s shoots
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Old 07-19-2010, 11:06 PM   #995
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cuervo72 View Post
Well, not far off I guess:

'Mad Men' star Crista Flanagan to pose in August edition of Playboy in recreation of '60s shoots

Read more: 'Mad Men' star Crista Flanagan to pose in August edition of Playboy in recreation of '60s shoots

She's like the 5th best looking woman on the show...
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Old 07-19-2010, 11:08 PM   #996
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I can't believe Lou Reed is still alive.
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Old 07-19-2010, 11:17 PM   #997
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Originally Posted by cuervo72 View Post
Well, not far off I guess:

'Mad Men' star Crista Flanagan to pose in August edition of Playboy in recreation of '60s shoots

Read more: 'Mad Men' star Crista Flanagan to pose in August edition of Playboy in recreation of '60s shoots

Its pretty far off I am afraid. You did nail the concept though, and in an ideal world you picked the right actress. Too bad.
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Old 07-19-2010, 11:45 PM   #998
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Yeah, I meant not far off the idea, not the execution. I'm assuming they went down the line until they got one to say yes.
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Old 07-20-2010, 12:11 AM   #999
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So we were talking full nude strip clubs in Skype today...and the QOTY popped up..

Quote:
[7/19/2010 6:43:46 PM] JW: because for every great looking vagina, there are a dozen droopy, nasty ones where as with tittays, even fat ugly chicks can have great looking knockers

I about spit out my drink...
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Old 07-20-2010, 01:47 PM   #1000
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Slow day here on the Front...
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