Kodos' Paint-Chip Eating Dynasty

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 05:34 PM

My first paint chip came off the wall in the downstairs bathroom. Lime-green, I'm guessing that it came from a good-old-fashioned lead-based paint. While a little dry at first, the chip became more palatable as I worked some saliva into it. My initial impression is that it could use some salt... Still, it is a far cry better than the fare that can be found at your local Hooters. Cautiously, I label my first experience a success. I will have to try an oil-based paint next, to see if it can hold up without the need for added seasoning.

Poli · 03-16-2004, 06:12 PM

And I thought I was weird.

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 06:18 PM

Le chip numeros deux.

For my next chip, I slected a shiny rust-coloured flake that had chipped of off the fender of my vintege 1983 Chevrolay Chevette. Once the initial bleeding stopped (the chip was a bit jaggd), I was left with a pleasent mettalic aftertaste not-unlike the time I accidently injested the Tab of off a tab of can. Pehraps the blood acteda s a bit of a lubricannt, as ths thyme I did not notice any problem wiht drieieness.

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ardent enthusiast

And I thought I was weird.

Quiet, ewe!

illinifan999 · 03-16-2004, 06:34 PM

YOU CANNOT STOP THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

korme · 03-16-2004, 07:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

Le chip numeros deux.

For my next chip, I slected a shiny rust-coloured flake that had chipped of off the fender of my vintege 1983 Chevrolay Chevette. Once the initial bleeding stopped (the chip was a bit jaggd), I was left with a pleasent mettalic aftertaste not-unlike the time I accidently injested the Tab of off a tab of can. Pehraps the blood acteda s a bit of a lubricannt, as ths thyme I did not notice any problem wiht drieieness.

I didn't know you were Canadian.

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 07:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by illinifan999

YOU CANNOT STOP THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Iii hab no ententsion off dat, myfriend.

Chipito nomber forr.

Kno, 3..

Kno 4 isa ship of offmy setpic tankn out;n backyadr A. liteish collar ship, i deaturmun dat it kneads dipp. Outt two the gragea i go,. Thier issum olde peintcans innthere... . Ifinda sckrewdrier and prie of hte li d. Ouhcc! Cutmerdagnedhadn!!!

Ennside i see a knise geernish colours dippin g saowse. Ummmmmmnnn, gooooo ooddoodd1 . Thta hit's hte stopp!!1 Sucksess! Wet luckc,Thee flafour oaughtht too o lattss fror dys. Bery verry godd.

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shorty3281

I didn't know you were Canadian.

Ohhhyeheaha. I ogtdepostered forea bgein a pubic men ass.

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 07:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

Ohhhyeheaha. I ogtdepostered forea bgein a pubic men ass.

sossry. imneat men; ace3

Raven Hawk · 03-16-2004, 07:21 PM

Go Rochester! Beat the Evil Mohawks!

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raven Hawk

Go Rochester! Beat the Evil Mohawks!

heleljll eyah!!!!! .

Fonzie · 03-16-2004, 08:27 PM

More chips!

sterlingice · 03-16-2004, 09:11 PM

This thread explains so much!

SI

Poli · 03-16-2004, 09:28 PM

I believe the paint chips have finally eroded our alien's brain.

sachmo71 · 03-16-2004, 09:44 PM

Methinks there is a lesson to be learned here.

JeeberD · 03-16-2004, 10:16 PM

That we need to eat paint as well if we're going to understand what he's saying?

Poli · 03-16-2004, 11:01 PM

That someone needs to go to the Kodos household and bury him.

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 11:08 PM

The cat says that I past out after teh dips 'n chimps, but I thing he is telling a tall tail. Still, the cat hasnot lyed tom e beorfe. I well half toby more carefool...

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 11:16 PM

nEx t'up, tiime forsum ting form teh dek. It is read,nd loooks qiite delishous. ODown shegoes!

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 11:18 PM

Gaaack! Dam splinturds...

Taist like ... fricken would. Blecch.

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 11:23 PM

AELAJ SERAK DA PREOPARERA:

ACH KHAHBIN0D KIKSO ADKA ASEFA ADKFIJ AKD REE'PDA EADADF. NUBALKJ AE KKNA DAKEAJA&. JPARKAD KAJLKE ALKDJ AEUL A AFELOEA? AJDL NJZICM,

NIHICAT,
KOEDOSEA

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 11:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

AELAJ SERAK DA PREOPARERA:

ACH KHAHBIN0D KIKSO ADKA ASEFA ADKFIJ AKD REE'PDA EADADF. NUBALKJ AE KKNA DAKEAJA&. JPARKAD KAJLKE ALKDJ AEUL A AFELOEA? AJDL NJZICM,

NIHICAT,
KOEDOSEA

Deer Primiteve Erth dwellerz,

I acccidental ly esnt the pervouis massage to ewe. It waas intentend togo to Serak the PReparer backkc on Riggel IV.. Eye wantted two no watt Erth bevmirage woold go wthi peint ships.

Sarek re-commendead your Earht paint thinnnner. Will giv itatry...

Kodos · 03-16-2004, 11:36 PM

Da't Snarak do'nt lye. teh thinmer hsit the stop.

Hay Snoballz. Puddytat wannt summm millkk? or mebbe somm rustolleum? Hhahhahaa, ssilly puddy. Thnat's foremee.

Summbunny want aship?1/? Maaybe some thhiner?

JeeberD · 03-16-2004, 11:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

Deer Primiteve Erth dwellerz,

I acccidental ly esnt the pervouis massage to ewe. It waas intentend togo to Serak the PReparer backkc on Riggel IV.. Eye wantted two no watt Erth bevmirage woold go wthi peint ships.

Sarek re-commendead your Earht paint thinnnner. Will giv itatry...

Rigel IV my ass! I recognize Sectoid when I see it! I shoule have known you were in cahoots with those bastards...

Get him, boys!!!

Chief Rum · 03-16-2004, 11:57 PM

I rate this thread a five-star!

CR

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 12:11 AM

Errmm. Hyea chIeffy. Mite wont toot lokk intwo yorr raaatingn sisttem.

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 12:23 AM

Are yuo reely a Chef, rum?.?

Chief Rum · 03-17-2004, 12:46 AM

Yes. I make a great Bernaise sauce. And grilled cheese sandwiches. And Oreo cookies (Step One: Open package, Step Two: Remove six cookies, Step Three: Place cookies on small serving plate in geometrically pleasing pattern, Step Four: Serve with milk).

CR

Lokugh · 03-17-2004, 09:36 AM

Yeah...Kodos started St. Paddy's a bit early, I think.

Interesting factoid (or maybe not): According to a show I saw, the reason why lead paint is so dangerous is that it is sweet. If it tasted like well...paint...it would not be that big of a problem. But it tastes sweet, so babies and small children (and apparently aliens from Rigel) will eat it.

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 10:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lokugh

Yeah...Kodos started St. Paddy's a bit early, I think.

Interesting factoid (or maybe not): According to a show I saw, the reason why lead paint is so dangerous is that it is sweet. If it tasted like well...paint...it would not be that big of a problem. But it tastes sweet, so babies and small children (and apparently aliens from Rigel) will eat it.

The paint isn't sweet, but you sure are, fellah!

WussGawd · 03-17-2004, 11:13 AM

Can we just hand this thread a 2005 Golden Scribe Award now?

Radii · 03-17-2004, 11:16 AM

Best thread ever.

The Afoci · 03-17-2004, 11:21 AM

My paint tastes like acid.

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 12:09 PM

Tastes like burning!

It's funny how many people have seen fit to rate a joke thread like this.

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 01:49 PM

It's somewhat disheartening to note that this dynasty has provoked much more interest than my Rochester dynasty...

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 02:52 PM

This thread is also amusing in that Chief Rum started it off with a high rating, and now others have felt compelled to drive its thread rating down from the initial 5 rating.

For what it's worth, I agree with the folks driving it down - It's crap!!!

Radii · 03-17-2004, 03:21 PM

You finally found a topic in paint chip eating that we can all relate to.

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 03:34 PM

And to think that I've been wasting all my effort on football dynasties for all this time!

QuikSand · 03-17-2004, 03:37 PM

Golden Scribes all around!

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 04:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by QuikSand

Golden Scribes all around!

If I didn't know better, I'd think this was an attempt at sarcasm...

Blame it on Marmel. It was HIS idea. Kinda...

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 04:06 PM

Wait, no, I accused Marmel incorrectly. Here is the real culprit:

Quote:

Originally Posted by corbes

I was going to write a dynasty about eating paint chips, but it got kinda unintelligible towards the end.

primelord · 03-17-2004, 04:10 PM

The way you play Madden I just assumed you had been eating paint chips all along. Who knew?

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 04:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by primelord

The way you play Madden I just assumed you had been eating paint chips all along. Who knew?

Hey, bucko. Who has a couple-game win streak against you?!?

Radii · 03-17-2004, 06:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

Da't Snarak do'nt lye. teh thinmer hsit the stop.

Hay Snoballz. Puddytat wannt summm millkk? or mebbe somm rustolleum? Hhahhahaa, ssilly puddy. Thnat's foremee.

Summbunny want aship?1/? Maaybe some thhiner?

My favorite part of this post is that it was edited... must have been a typo in the original.

cthomer5000 · 03-17-2004, 07:09 PM

I like it.

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 09:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Radii

My favorite part of this post is that it was edited... must have been a typo in the original.

Yeah. The I forgot the end color tag.

Poli · 03-17-2004, 10:01 PM

You mean you were faking?

Kodos · 03-17-2004, 10:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ardent enthusiast

You mean you were faking?

Come on!... Could somebody fake something this good?!?

Poli · 03-17-2004, 10:18 PM

Didn't you see my walk on dynasty?

mckerney · 03-17-2004, 10:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

AELAJ SERAK DA PREOPARERA:

ACH KHAHBIN0D KIKSO ADKA ASEFA ADKFIJ AKD REE'PDA EADADF. NUBALKJ AE KKNA DAKEAJA&. JPARKAD KAJLKE ALKDJ AEUL A AFELOEA? AJDL NJZICM,

NIHICAT,
KOEDOSEA

Babel fish doesn't work for this, could you point me to another translator that would work?

03-16-2004, 06:12 PM	#2
Poli FOFC Survivor Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Wentzville, MO	And I thought I was weird. __________________ Cheer for a walk on quarterback! Ardent leads the Vols in the dynasty forum.

03-16-2004, 06:34 PM	#5
illinifan999 Pro Rookie Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: VA	YOU CANNOT STOP THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! __________________ Chicago Eagles 2 time ZFL champions We're "rebuilding"

03-16-2004, 07:21 PM	#10
Raven Hawk College Starter Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Thunderdome	Go Rochester! Beat the Evil Mohawks! __________________ Owner of The Shreveport Pride in The CFL

03-16-2004, 09:11 PM	#13
sterlingice Hall Of Famer Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Back in Houston!	This thread explains so much! SI __________________ Houston Hippopotami, III.3: 20th Anniversary Thread - All former HT players are encouraged to check it out! Janos: "Only America could produce an imbecile of your caliber!" Freakazoid: "That's because we make lots of things better than other people!"

03-16-2004, 09:28 PM	#14
Poli FOFC Survivor Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Wentzville, MO	I believe the paint chips have finally eroded our alien's brain. __________________ Cheer for a walk on quarterback! Ardent leads the Vols in the dynasty forum.

03-16-2004, 06:18 PM	#3
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	Le chip numeros deux. For my next chip, I slected a shiny rust-coloured flake that had chipped of off the fender of my vintege 1983 Chevrolay Chevette. Once the initial bleeding stopped (the chip was a bit jaggd), I was left with a pleasent mettalic aftertaste not-unlike the time I accidently injested the Tab of off a tab of can. Pehraps the blood acteda s a bit of a lubricannt, as ths thyme I did not notice any problem wiht drieieness.

03-16-2004, 08:27 PM	#12
Fonzie Pro Rookie Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Illinois	More chips!

03-16-2004, 09:44 PM	#15
sachmo71 The boy who cried Trout Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: TX	Methinks there is a lesson to be learned here.

03-16-2004, 10:16 PM	#16
JeeberD General Manager Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The Town of Flower Mound	That we need to eat paint as well if we're going to understand what he's saying? __________________ UTEP Miners!!! I solemnly swear to never cheer for TO

03-16-2004, 11:01 PM	#17
Poli FOFC Survivor Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Wentzville, MO	That someone needs to go to the Kodos household and bury him. __________________ Cheer for a walk on quarterback! Ardent leads the Vols in the dynasty forum.

03-16-2004, 11:08 PM	#18
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	The cat says that I past out after teh dips 'n chimps, but I thing he is telling a tall tail. Still, the cat hasnot lyed tom e beorfe. I well half toby more carefool...

03-16-2004, 11:16 PM	#19
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	nEx t'up, tiime forsum ting form teh dek. It is read,nd loooks qiite delishous. ODown shegoes!

03-16-2004, 11:18 PM	#20
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	Gaaack! Dam splinturds... Taist like ... fricken would. Blecch.

03-16-2004, 11:23 PM	#21
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	AELAJ SERAK DA PREOPARERA: ACH KHAHBIN0D KIKSO ADKA ASEFA ADKFIJ AKD REE'PDA EADADF. NUBALKJ AE KKNA DAKEAJA&. JPARKAD KAJLKE ALKDJ AEUL A AFELOEA? AJDL NJZICM, NIHICAT, KOEDOSEA Last edited by Kodos : 03-16-2004 at 11:23 PM.

03-16-2004, 11:36 PM	#23
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	Da't Snarak do'nt lye. teh thinmer hsit the stop. Hay Snoballz. Puddytat wannt summm millkk? or mebbe somm rustolleum? Hhahhahaa, ssilly puddy. Thnat's foremee. Summbunny want aship?1/? Maaybe some thhiner? Last edited by Kodos : 03-16-2004 at 11:38 PM.

03-16-2004, 11:57 PM	#25
Chief Rum Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Where Hip Hop lives	I rate this thread a five-star! CR __________________ . . I would rather be wrong...Than live in the shadows of your song...My mind is open wide...And now I'm ready to start...You're not sure...You open the door...And step out into the dark...Now I'm ready.

03-17-2004, 12:11 AM	#26
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	Errmm. Hyea chIeffy. Mite wont toot lokk intwo yorr raaatingn sisttem.

03-17-2004, 12:23 AM	#27
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	Are yuo reely a Chef, rum?.?

03-17-2004, 12:46 AM	#28
Chief Rum Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Where Hip Hop lives	Yes. I make a great Bernaise sauce. And grilled cheese sandwiches. And Oreo cookies (Step One: Open package, Step Two: Remove six cookies, Step Three: Place cookies on small serving plate in geometrically pleasing pattern, Step Four: Serve with milk). CR __________________ . . I would rather be wrong...Than live in the shadows of your song...My mind is open wide...And now I'm ready to start...You're not sure...You open the door...And step out into the dark...Now I'm ready.

03-17-2004, 09:36 AM	#29
Lokugh Mascot Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Austin, TX	Yeah...Kodos started St. Paddy's a bit early, I think. Interesting factoid (or maybe not): According to a show I saw, the reason why lead paint is so dangerous is that it is sweet. If it tasted like well...paint...it would not be that big of a problem. But it tastes sweet, so babies and small children (and apparently aliens from Rigel) will eat it. Last edited by Lokugh : 03-17-2004 at 09:37 AM.

03-17-2004, 11:13 AM	#31
WussGawd College Benchwarmer Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: Avondale, AZ, USA, Planet Earth, Milky Way Galaxy	Can we just hand this thread a 2005 Golden Scribe Award now? __________________ "I guess I'll fade into Bolivian." -Mike Tyson, after being knocked out by Lennox Lewis. Proud Dumba Elect of the "Biggest Dumba of FOFC Award" Author of the 2004 Golden Scribe Gold Trophy for Best Basketball Dynasty, It Rhymes With Puke.

03-17-2004, 11:16 AM	#32
Radii Head Coach Join Date: Jul 2001	Best thread ever.

03-17-2004, 11:21 AM	#33
The Afoci Pro Rookie Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Moorhead	My paint tastes like acid. __________________ I had something.

03-17-2004, 12:09 PM	#34
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	Tastes like burning! It's funny how many people have seen fit to rate a joke thread like this.

03-17-2004, 01:49 PM	#35
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	It's somewhat disheartening to note that this dynasty has provoked much more interest than my Rochester dynasty... Last edited by Kodos : 03-17-2004 at 01:49 PM.

03-17-2004, 02:52 PM	#36
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	This thread is also amusing in that Chief Rum started it off with a high rating, and now others have felt compelled to drive its thread rating down from the initial 5 rating. For what it's worth, I agree with the folks driving it down - It's crap!!!

03-17-2004, 03:21 PM	#37
Radii Head Coach Join Date: Jul 2001	You finally found a topic in paint chip eating that we can all relate to.

03-17-2004, 03:34 PM	#38
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	And to think that I've been wasting all my effort on football dynasties for all this time!

03-17-2004, 03:37 PM	#39
QuikSand lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Annapolis, Md	Golden Scribes all around!

03-17-2004, 04:10 PM	#42
primelord Pro Rookie Join Date: Oct 2000	The way you play Madden I just assumed you had been eating paint chips all along. Who knew?

03-17-2004, 10:01 PM	#47
Poli FOFC Survivor Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Wentzville, MO	You mean you were faking? __________________ Cheer for a walk on quarterback! Ardent leads the Vols in the dynasty forum.

03-17-2004, 10:18 PM	#49
Poli FOFC Survivor Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Wentzville, MO	Didn't you see my walk on dynasty? __________________ Cheer for a walk on quarterback! Ardent leads the Vols in the dynasty forum.

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