Living Will

[cartman]

Here's one I found that I really like. Feel free to use it, or modify it for your purposes...

I, __________________, being of sound mind and
body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by
artificial means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the
hands of peckerwood politicans who couldn't pass
9th grade biology.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to
sit up and ask for a cold beer, it should be presumed
that I won't ever get better and don't want to live.
If a further test is needed, put some porn on the TV
and look for a reaction. If no reaction, I'm done.
When such a determination is reached, I hereby
instruct my spouse, children doctor, or whoever
to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, strike the tents,
clean the cages, and call it a day.

Under no circumstances shall the members of any
legislature enact a special law to keep me on
life-support. It is my wish that these boneheads
mind their own damn business and pay attention
instead to the health, education and wellfare of the
millions of Americans who aren't in a permanent
coma.

If any of my family goes against my wishes and turns
my case into a political issue, I hereby promise to
come back from the grave and make his/her existence
a living hell!