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It's a Bucs life
This is a discussion on It's a Bucs life within the Football Dynasties forums.
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09-28-2016, 03:57 PM | #1 |
Rookie
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It's a Bucs life
Before I get started here, I would like to give a shout out to everybody who puts time and effort into their dynasties, you have given me endless entertainment and after some time of following and gathering ideas I shall be starting my own. I want to give an extra shout out to aima_guru, I will be following a similar model to his dynasty where I include a mix of fictional/real people/players as well as a mixture of my own personal wacky humor and some bouts of seriousness. Any slander done in any way against a real person is purely FICTIONAL. With that being said, here are the settings in which I will abide by in this franchise.
All-Madden 10 minute quarters 25 second run off Flazko's SECRET SAUCE sliders Human+cpu will progress players every 4 weeks Flazko's XP sliders OSFM rosters (9/28 roster) SIM style, I love the no-switch rule as gameplay will reflect player ratings While making trades, I will try to be as realistic and fair as possible for myself and the CPU, I hate when people load up on 10 first round picks, sorry that doesn't happen. And now, the Donald Pump era begins. Glazer's sell Bucs for 2 Billion to an unusual buyer, details below Myron Gaines ESPN Staff Writer 7/28/16 According to Adam Schefter, The Glazer's have sold the Tampa Bay Buccaneers to famous celebrity, billionaire businessman, and former Republican Nominee, Donald Pump. Pump, who randomly dropped out of the race and changed his name, was last seen in June of 2016. The Glazer's decided to hold a press conference that most assumed would be a last thank you and goodbye speech given by the Glazer's, but they were dead wrong, here are some of the quotes from the Glazer brothers from the press conference. Malcolm: "We bought this team in '95 and have won one superbowl since..this team is ****ing hot garbage. People always approach me about MAN U, not the BUCS...what the ****? Also our stadium is filled up just about as good as a ****ing D3 college football team. ****! " Joel: "Another reason we're selling this team is because our country is about to be run by Hillary Clinton and we're getting the **** out of here. All of us brothers are planning on moving to England and purely focusing on MAN U, we're going to make it the greatest soccer club known to mankind and there is nobody that can stop us!! WE'RE RICH BITCH!!!!!!!!!" Malcolm: "I think you guys get the point. We're done with this trash football team that constantly sets new records that are all negative, we switch coaches every god damn year, we make guys like case keenum look like tom ****ing brady against us, im sick of the expectations and us never finishing anywhere near a playoff spot. For ****s sake I can't believe I hired Lovie Smith, that dude brainwashed me on the ****ing cover 2 system that worked maybe decades ago..even though he's gone our whole team is still under his spell, he's a ****ing wizard I tell you! I could go on and on but I won't even waste my time, I've got my money, my brothers, my kids, my bitches, and we're about to sail to England. Good luck with Donald Pump! Peace bitches!!!" Then, in perfectly synchronicity, all of the Glazer brothers turned around, bent over, and pulled down their pants, revealing their excessively hairy asses to the reporters, and well...to the entire world. Moving forward to Donald Pump, the supposed new owner of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers who hasn't been seen since June, will hold a press conference next week introducing himself as the new head of the franchise as well as possible giving us an explanation to his disappearance.
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GT: Bigsteve15 Last edited by bigsteve15; 10-02-2016 at 02:02 AM. |
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09-28-2016, 03:58 PM | #2 |
Rookie
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Re: It's a Bucs life
-Ho Lee Fuk ESPN Staff Writer BUCCANEERS - New owner Donald Pump held a press conference today as the new Buccaneers Owner, it has also been the first time anyone has seen Donald Pump since he quit the Presidential race in June. To say the least, the world is shocked by his appearance. Donald Pump is now a monster in stature. He now gives Ronnie Coleman a run for his money. Below are the highlights to his press conference as well as a picture of the new and what seems to be improved, Donald Pump. Donald Pump: "Before I get into any football, I'm sure many of you are wondering where I have been, what I have been doing, why I quit the race, and why I'm so ****ing sexy and jacked now. Back in June the race was going well, I really thought I had a chance to win, but then the worst happened. My bitch ex wife, Marla, was so bitter about our disaster of a marriage that she sent a picture of my penis to Hillary Clinton, the biggest bitch of all time. I am going to be honest with you guys, it wasn't an ordinary dick pick, my dick isn't ordinary, I have a micro-penis." The crowd silenced faster than light-speed, and some chuckles started to emerge, but the crowd stayed attentive, waiting for the rest of what Donald Pump had to say. Donald Pump: "So basically Hillary Clinton texted me and told me that she would release the dick pics to the world unless I dropped out of the race. After much contemplation and rage I decided to drop out and basically give her the Presidency. It was the hardest choice I had to make in my entire life, but I told myself if I'm going to drop out, I'm going away for awhile to work on myself and come up with my next venture. I moved to Florida and and decided I wanted to become a bodybuilder. So I called Dwayne "the rock" Johnson and told him my story. He was reluctant at first but took my offer. I basically paid The Rock money to train me, allow me to stay at his house under the radar, and eventually learn about football. Dwayne and I became very close, we're like brothers now. I also changed my last name, I didn't want to be known as what identified me as a Trump. It wasn't until August that I heard those **** boy Glazer's were selling the team. Since I had money and had been learning about football from Dwayne I believed the Universe had been speaking to me, that this would be my next venture. So I met with the Glazer's who we're trashed out of their minds on liquor and complete dicks. We agreed on a deal and they told me "good luck getting 1 win you big head son of a bitch!" I told them they can **** right off and that I would turn this team around to accomplish more than those greasy bastards ever did. So here I am, a fresh start, and the new owner of a team that has much talent and a good head coach in Koetter." Last edited by bigsteve15; 09-28-2016 at 04:52 PM. |
09-28-2016, 03:58 PM | #3 | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Re: It's a Bucs life
2016 Season Outlook
Qb's: Jameis Winston, the Bucs Franchise QB, will be leading the pack. Rb's: Doug Martin will be taking the bulk of the carries primarily in under-center formations. Charles Sims III will play a big role as well, he will be spelled in during wide spread shotgun formations for running and passing duties. Wr's: Mike Evans and Vincent Jackson will continue to be big physical targets as well as red zone threats. Humphries will exclusively play the slot receiver role as he is smaller and more shifty. Te's: Not a strong core, but the unit can display decent pass catching skills as well as run blocking. The starting TE's on this team will play a big role in our offense serving as a FB, receiver and blocker. Without the help from this unit the run game will suffer. Offensive lineman: Young mixed with some vets. Donovan Smith will have the biggest challenge as a 2nd year LT blocking for Jameis' blindside. 2nd year RG ali marpet will have to continue to prove himself as the best run blocker on the line. Vets Sweezy, Smith, and Dotson will have to perform well regardless of if the youngsters struggle, and will have to stay healthy. Defensive lineman: The most interesting unit on this team. The addition of robert ayers finally provides the buccaneers with a much needed pass rusher. In previous season the Bucs have relied on Gerald McCoy too much, mccoy has led in sacks the last two years. Also, 2016 2nd round pick Noah Spence will certainly be in the mix subbing in on passing downs in place for william gholston as a pass rusher opposite end of ayers. Gholston is a decent run stopper and will be doing work primarily on running plays. McCoy will do his usual thing, but his success also relies on the ends. If pressure isn't generated mccoy will continue to be double teamed and get nowhere. Linebackers: A strong unit on this team. New addition SLB Daryl Smith will serve as a run stopper as well as blitzer. All of the bucs linebackers will be blitzing heavily. Lavonte is tampa's best player hands down and will continue to be the "flash" as many call him. Kwon alexander is a young stud at MLB that is looking to be a franchise middle linebacker for the bucs. Cornerbacks: This unit will either be boom or bust. New addition brent grimes and 2016 1st round pick vernon hargreaves will be starting corners. Other than those two the rest of the corners are very suspect. Verner will play as nickel corner, however, with verners slow speed and average at best covering skills will he be able to keep up with today's NFL slot receivers? Safeties: Probably the most suspect unit on this team. Bradley "scottish thunder" McDougald will be starting free safety. He is not a very good tackler but has decent speed and average coverage skills. Starting strong safety is chris conte, who is a decent tackler but has been known to give up big plays. It is too early to tell but safety is one of the positions I will be looking to upgrade in the off season. Special teams: Rookie kicker robertyo aguayo was taken in the 2nd round 2016 draft, many hated this pick citing that taking a kicker in the 2nd is too early, he will have to prove himself worthy. New punter bryan anger is looking to be a solid punter for the bucs, he has a very powerful leg and decent accuracy. Kick returners ja. rodgers and adam humphries are average returners with not that great of carrying skills and average at best speed.
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GT: Bigsteve15 Last edited by bigsteve15; 09-28-2016 at 05:24 PM. |
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09-28-2016, 06:38 PM | #4 |
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Re: It's a Bucs life
Hopefully donald pump can do great things. Love the name lol.
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09-28-2016, 06:49 PM | #5 | ||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Re: It's a Bucs life
__________________
GT: Bigsteve15 |
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10-01-2016, 11:18 AM | #6 | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Re: It's a Bucs life
ESPN Staff Writer The Tampa Bay Buccaneers lose to the Atlanta Falcons 21 to 49. Matt Ryan posted a 396 YD, 6 TD and 2 int game. The Buccaneers secondary had no answer to Matt Ryan as well as Julio Jones who grabbed nearly 200 yards receiving with 2 TD's. The Bucs knew going into week 1 that Matty Ice would be on his game, but they had no idea he would make the Bucs secondary look like swiss cheese. Here are some quotes from the post-game press conference with Head Coach Dirk Koetter and Owner Donald Pump. Coach Koetter: "The Game started off showing promise, Hargreaves got his very first interception as a pro football player and we had good field position to score first, but we just couldn't get in the red zone. The biggest problem we had today was that our defense was on the field way too much and our offense way too little. In fact, the dirty birds didn't even punt until the 4th quarter, that should you everything you need to know." Some good looking local sports news reporter: "With the way the defense performed today and how the offense coudn't get anything going, how do you plan on winning games this season?" Donald Pump: "Look here felicia, I know our secondary is ****ing garbage okay? We had two interceptions and couldn't do **** with it either, so it's not all on the defense. However, if our secondary keeps giving up a lot of points I will look into making whatever trade or free agency addition necessary to win games this season. I will not fail like I failed against that BITCH Hillary Clinton okay? We will watch tape, we will make adjustments during practice, and we will come out a better team against the Cardinals in week 2." Donald Pump stands up and of course, as usual, presents the crowd with hitting a front-lateral spread. Stats/Analysis
Offense Analysis: Offense wasn't on the field too much the entire game(16 minutes), which shows the low yardage. Doug Martin had a long run for a touchdown but struggled on almost every other carry, the Falcons D line was penetrating hard into the backfield disrupting running and passing plays. Jameis Winston played decent until late in the game where he threw 3 interceptions trying to force the ball. Defense Analysis: Secondary was porous. Only positives in the secondary were Hargreaves III and McDougald Interceptions. Not one sack generated by the Bucs d-line. The Bucs run defense was bad too giving up a touchdown and over 100 yards to Freeman. The only bright spot on the defense so far are the linebackers in alexander, david, and smith who are always flying around the ball carrier, as well as hargreaves and mcdougald recording their first interception of the season. Secondary must improve as they let the offense have the ball for 23 minutes, 7 more minutes than the Bucs offense had.
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GT: Bigsteve15 Last edited by bigsteve15; 10-01-2016 at 05:36 PM. |
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10-01-2016, 07:30 PM | #7 | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Re: It's a Bucs life
Bucs lose two in a row, multiple players injured in Week 2 9/17/16 Myron Gaines -ESPN Writer Bucs lose once again, 24 to 45 to the Cardinals in week 2. If that couldn't be bad enough, the Buccaneers lose 3 starters to injuries. Among those injuried, starting free safety Bradley "scottish thunder" McDougald is out for 8 weeks due to a broken collerbone. Also in the same fashion, rookie Noah Spence is out for 7 weeks. Lastly, the bucs lose another D-lineman in William Gholston. This puts a huge strain on the Bucs D that are already struggling mightily even when healthy. Rookie Safety Ryan Smith will become the starting free safety until McDougald is healthy. Because there were 2 defensive lineman injured who played big roles in the defense, the Bucs will look to depth players such as Jac. Smith, Howard Jones, and newly promoted practice squad players Channing Ward and Devonte Lambert. To make room for both players to join the roster, the Bucs have cut 3rd string QB Ryan Griffin. In regards to the continuous poor secondary play, coach Koetter had a few comments to make. "I know our secondary looks really bad right now, but it's still early in the season. I want to see what my guys can do in Week 3 for our first home game against the Rams. It's extremely tough to start the season with two away games against two really good teams. Our pass rush woke up a little bit, our offense did much better, and though our secondary gave up a lot of yards and touchdowns it wasn't as bad as next week, those are the improvements between week 1 and week 2 and we will continue to build on it." Owner Donald Pump also had a few things to say at the post-game conference. "Look, that Rand Paul lookin sun of a gun pretty much said most of what needed to be said. We got injuries, we got secondary problems, but we're improving. Injuries are not an excuse god damnit, every team has injured players. You go into every season trying to gather the best team as possible so when players do get injuries you have guys who can step in and continue to march forward, the next man up kind of thing or whatever they say god damnit. Our players have to wake the **** up because next week is our first home game against the ****ing Rams and we better beat them or we're going to start looking like a sorry *** team. If we don't turn it around week 3 some players will be on the hot seat. I don't ****ing tank seasons for draft picks ok? I will do my best to bring in guys in whatever way I can to make this football team better." "Now if you will excuse me, I have to go **** my wife Ivana Christian Bale style, like in the movie American Psycho, heh heh." Donald pump stands up and with every news reporter having their camera's ready to take pictures of Pump's sexy bodybuilding poses, Mr. Pump does not flex, instead, the attention turns to his pants where a dainty bulge is present, perhaps where his rumored "micro-penis" is located....
Offense analysis: Jameis had an average game, not putting up many yards and throwing two picks. Doug had another good week but only 8 carries because the team got behind. Mike Evans had a stellar day racking up over 100 yards and 2 TD's. So far the offense has been heavily reliant upon Martin and getting the ball to Evans. 2nd year LT donovan smith gave up a sack and 2nd year RG ali marpet gave up 2 sacks against an aggressive Cardinals D. Defense analysis: Kwon Alexander balled out with 7 tackles and 1.5 sacks. Lavonte got himself 10 tackles and 0.5 sacks. Just as mentioned in last weeks analysis the linebacking core is the strongest part of this defense. Chris conte got 10 tackles which would be productive if the opposing RB didnt rush for many yards but once again like in week 1 the Bucs gave up over 100 yards rushing. The secondary was bad once again giving up 5 touchdowns and generating no turnovers.
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GT: Bigsteve15 Last edited by bigsteve15; 10-02-2016 at 02:04 AM. |
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10-02-2016, 01:56 AM | #8 | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Rookie
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Re: It's a Bucs life
Buccaneers get their first win against the L.A. Rams in week 3 Jack M. Hoff -ESPN writer 9/25/16 The Tampa Bay Buccaneers finally get their first win after the first two horrible outings. The Bucs feel like they have finally found their game plan which proved successful against the Rams even with their stout front 7. Here is what head coach Dirk Koetter had to say about the Bucs first win. "It felt really good to win, especially at home. We watched a lot of film from last week and really tried to correct our mistakes and it paid off. Last week even though we had over 100 rushing yards we only carried the ball less than 15 times total, so we became one dimensional with the passing attack. This week we had almost 30 carries total totaling over 100 yards against a very stout Rams D-line which is very impressive. The run game opened up the pass game and allowed Winston to abuse the Rams secondary with Evans. It was a great day of football but we have to recover and get back to the grind, we have a tough matchup next week against a Broncos defense who isn't forgiving at all." Mike Evans had a big day today, hauling in 8 catches for over 200 yards and 3 touchdowns, here is what he had to say about his big day. "I just had a huge chip on my shoulder from losing the first two weeks, I knew I had to be near perfect today to help the team get a win. Jameis and I knew we had a big height advantage over the Rams secondary so we took advantage of it and he just put it up high and deep for me to go get it. Next week is going to be tough, Talib and Harris J.R. are two of the best DB's in the league and I have to be ready." Out of all of the people ecstatic about this win, new owner Donald Pump is on cloud 9, here is what he had to say about today's win. "It feels really good, it even feels better than hittin that sweet *** wife of mine Ivana and knowing I'm a billionaire. I can only dream that we keep this winning thing going, Ivana told me that every time we get a win she will do a little sumthin sumthin to my down stairs mixup while I'm taking a ****...do you know what they call that? They call it a BLUMPKIN... can you believe that? how the **** do you come up with a name like that?" That will wrap it up there, as Donald Pump's PR guy(yes he has a personal PR dude) took him by his arm gently and escorted him out before he says something else disgusting. Stats
Analysis Offense: Jameis and Mike Evans were the superstars on offense. Of Jameis' 293 yards, 212 were thrown to Mike Evans as well as all 3 touchdowns. Martin had another great day on the ground against a stout Rams D line almost racking up another 100 yard day. The offensive line improved greatly giving up no sacks and not one penalty committed. The Bucs finally stayed on the field longer than their opponent for the first time. Defense. The secondary played much better only allowing 2 touchdowns and even though Keenum threw for big yardage it was a lot of late game yardage in desperation to make a comeback. Even though injuries have plagued the d-line, Clinton McDonald and rookie Devante Lambert recorded a sack each. Before leaving the game with a shoulder strain, Kwon Alexander continues his wrath posting 9 tackles. The defense was especially stout against the run only allowing 58 yards rushing. Like the offense, the defense committed no penalties.
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GT: Bigsteve15 Last edited by bigsteve15; 10-02-2016 at 02:05 AM. |
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