Grieving and lost

[slickdtc]

Sorry for your loss. Sounds like she was loved by those around her.

Allow yourself to grieve and let yourself heal, although that will take time.

[LODHockey]

Quote: Originally Posted by Smallville102001

Grieving and lose is not a easy thing. How do you guys deal with like grieving and a lost of someone you where close to? I just lost my grandma wesday night she need to go has she was not in good shape and was just like suffering but man I miss her. I have always been really close with my grandparents and losing my grandma even though I known she is not suffering any more man this hurts I want my grandma back. Felling depressed right now first person I have lost that I am close to has my grandparents baby sat me and my sister growing up and I have never went more than like 2 months with out seeing them. Fell bad for my grandpa to and just the thought that I am never going to see my grandma again hurts so much. I had been felling better the last day or so but emotions are hitting me hard big time right now. I think part of it was that I was with a lot of family like wesday when she past and also like Thursday, Saturday and Sunday so really only today and Friday have I been like by my self and I think being by my self makes it kind of harder and even Friday I hang out with friends so today is like the first full day being by my self. I kind of want to be with friends or something but I also kind of just want to be by my self right now.

The best advice I ever got for or about grieving: Grief shared is Grief deminished

That was from a Funeral Director at my father's funeral. No truer words have I learned and passed along. If you have faith it is not a goodbye, it is a farewell til we see each other again in a more perfect place and time. That's my words. I hold tight to them as I do believe their is more to human life after death.


Best wishes fellow gamer. Prayers if you wish as well.


Sent from my Moto Z (2) using Operation Sports mobile app

[Smallville102001]

Quote: Originally Posted by kt-od

He was 71. Yes, very painful for him. Yes He's good all the time

Oh long did he have it? Cancer runs in my family but I dont think any one has had bone cancer though.

[kt-od]

Quote: Originally Posted by Smallville102001

Oh long did he have it? Cancer runs in my family but I dont think any one has had bone cancer though.

He got diagnosed 6 years ago. He had some treatments and was in remission for about 5 years. It came back 4 months ago real aggressively. He couldn't beat it this time. He was a Vietnam Veteran and the doctors say that he probably contracted it from Agent Orange over there. His type of cancer was high on the list of diseases from it.

[mkharsh33]

First off, I'm very touched by these stories of loss... Keep talking about your loved ones. They might leave us physically, but the stories and memories are a must - they help.

Also know this - I'm a minister. I graduated from Bible College (Cincinnati Christian University) in 1995 and have been in ministry for 27 years in some capacity. I'm 47 - married with 3 teenagers. I've done more funerals than I can count - in the last 18 months I've done 14 of them - from almost 100 years old to a 25 year old killed in a car accident 2 months ago. I also did a funeral 3 years ago for a 15 year old killed in a car accident...

And personally - I did the funeral for my own son who was killed in a car accident December 9, 2015. So I fully get it.

What I have learned is this: the "time heals all wounds" is a myth - do NOT believe this. And do not believe all the bumper sticker bullcrap that people say. But don't fault them - people are lost to know what to say, how to say it - so they fumble a lot. They mean well - I tell people to see the heart more than you hear the words.

But I'm living this pain every day - and what I'll say is this: the WISE use of your time will soften the blow. Talk. Write. Get angry. Cry. Laugh.

But do NOT isolate yourself. In a message just 2 weeks ago I used an acronym for what I was sharing... H.A.L.T. - means to STOP. And there are 4 moments you need to be very cautious in your life because in those moments you can do something devastating that could screw you up forever.

Never let yourself get too...

H- hurting
A- angry
L- lonely
T- tired

Take care of yourself in those 4 areas. My advice is spiritual and biblical. I'm a person of faith, but I'm not here to shower that upon people. What I'll say is this: my faith has carried myself and our family. Our son was the oldest of 4 - if you met our other 3 kids, you'd never know what they went through...what they go through. My wife has taken this hard. I failed her - I just wanted her pain to go away, and it wasn't. I had to stop trying to act so tough and be there for her. But as a minister, I've also learned I'm held to a different and higher standard in my grief. To be candid, it has ticked me off. I was in essence asked to leave a church that I had served with for 13 years within 3 months of our son's death because the leadership felt it would be a "dark cloud hovering over them" if I stayed. Leaving was an atrocity - but I didn't know.

But it's not about me - I'm simply sharing the importance of taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally, physically (I've lost 90 pounds since them because I got back into shape), and even spiritually. It takes time - but again, good use of it. If you need someone - shoot me a note. I'll even give you my contact information. Not because I want to intrude, but because I believe in the promise of 1 Corinthians 1 - that God comforts us so we can then give comfort and compassion to others. I do what I do because I have been strengthened to give this gift of what I've received from others.

My prayers will be with you... Mike

[slickdtc]

That may be one of the best posts I’ve read on here. 100% real. Thanks for sharing, Mike.

We memorialize my mother every year, we just did this past week for the 22nd year. A small group of our family gets together, say a prayer, pay our respects by tossing a rose in to the inlet where my mother & father met, and take a moment to huddle up and reflect on life without some of our loved ones.

[Smallville102001]

Quote: Originally Posted by mkharsh33

First off, I'm very touched by these stories of loss... Keep talking about your loved ones. They might leave us physically, but the stories and memories are a must - they help. Also know this - I'm a minister. I graduated from Bible College (Cincinnati Christian University) in 1995 and have been in ministry for 27 years in some capacity. I'm 47 - married with 3 teenagers. I've done more funerals than I can count - in the last 18 months I've done 14 of them - from almost 100 years old to a 25 year old killed in a car accident 2 months ago. I also did a funeral 3 years ago for a 15 year old killed in a car accident... And personally - I did the funeral for my own son who was killed in a car accident December 9, 2015. So I fully get it. What I have learned is this: the "time heals all wounds" is a myth - do NOT believe this. And do not believe all the bumper sticker bullcrap that people say. But don't fault them - people are lost to know what to say, how to say it - so they fumble a lot. They mean well - I tell people to see the heart more than you hear the words. But I'm living this pain every day - and what I'll say is this: the WISE use of your time will soften the blow. Talk. Write. Get angry. Cry. Laugh. But do NOT isolate yourself. In a message just 2 weeks ago I used an acronym for what I was sharing... H.A.L.T. - means to STOP. And there are 4 moments you need to be very cautious in your life because in those moments you can do something devastating that could screw you up forever. Never let yourself get too... H- hurting A- angry L- lonely T- tired Take care of yourself in those 4 areas. My advice is spiritual and biblical. I'm a person of faith, but I'm not here to shower that upon people. What I'll say is this: my faith has carried myself and our family. Our son was the oldest of 4 - if you met our other 3 kids, you'd never know what they went through...what they go through. My wife has taken this hard. I failed her - I just wanted her pain to go away, and it wasn't. I had to stop trying to act so tough and be there for her. But as a minister, I've also learned I'm held to a different and higher standard in my grief. To be candid, it has ticked me off. I was in essence asked to leave a church that I had served with for 13 years within 3 months of our son's death because the leadership felt it would be a "dark cloud hovering over them" if I stayed. Leaving was an atrocity - but I didn't know. But it's not about me - I'm simply sharing the importance of taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally, physically (I've lost 90 pounds since them because I got back into shape), and even spiritually. It takes time - but again, good use of it. If you need someone - shoot me a note. I'll even give you my contact information. Not because I want to intrude, but because I believe in the promise of 1 Corinthians 1 - that God comforts us so we can then give comfort and compassion to others. I do what I do because I have been strengthened to give this gift of what I've received from others. My prayers will be with you... Mike

This post is great if you dont mind because faith is a big part of your life and something I find very important to could you PM me some songs that help you with Grieving and also some verse from the bible and like any good youtube videos that talk about like Grieving or dealing with hard times or any thing. If you could that would be great and thinks for this post.

[mkharsh33]

Quote: Originally Posted by Smallville102001

This post is great if you dont mind because faith is a big part of your life and something I find very important to could you PM me some songs that help you with Grieving and also some verse from the bible and like any good youtube videos that talk about like Grieving or dealing with hard times or any thing. If you could that would be great and thinks for this post.

I will. Give me some time as I'm knee deep into a lot of things right now (ministry stuff). But I promise I'll send some stuff in the next couple days.