[CalBears]

Confession Time: I've never seen any of the Back to the Future movies. A real blind spot, for sure, although I'm just shocked they made three of 'em. And people say we have too many sequels today! Anyway, a year has past in the fictional OOTPland. A year can change a lot after all, whether it’s in the state of American politics or the reputation of one Robinson Cano. Shame, shame!

The World Series match-up almost resembled real life, with the Houston Astros making it the World Series (although they had to chalk some up to luck, having survived an extra innings wildcard oneoff with the Blue Jays). They then blew through the poor Tribe of Cleveland 3-1 on the divisional side with 3 straight wins to end the series. On the other half of the AL, the Rangers absolutely blew the doors off of the cold and sad AL East champion Orioles, a 3-0 sweep without a game within 3 runs. That left the AL East without a win in 4 tries (take that, east coast bias!) and the two Texas teams to show down in the AL finale.

The Astros took a commanding 3-0 lead to the series with lockdown pitching (only 5 runs allowed in 3 games!), but the Rangers battled back with 2 consecutive wins to send it to a Game 6 in their home park. All the memes seemed primed to mock the team with the hill in center, although I’m not sure baseball has the cachet anymore to get ‘Houston blew a 3-0 lead’ meme status. It didn’t matter, though, as A.J. Reed blasted two home runs and the ‘Stros proved their Texan bonafides once and for all with an 11-5 victory.

On the other side of the bracket, the D-Backs took home a wildcard win over the Bryce Harper-less (relax, he got hurt) Nationals 13-4, with Stephen Strasburg getting lit up and sent to the showers very early. Unfortunately, there would be no throwback to the Craig Counsell glory days for Arizona, although who knows what would happen if they brought back the old jerseys. The Cubs beat em 3-2 in the NLDS, while the New York Mets (the New York Mets????? OOTP needs fixing pls patch) took quick care of the hated Dodgers 3-1 in the NLDS. Even If it’s totally unrealistic, anything to make the Dodgers lose is okay by us.

Cubs-Mets went the full 7, with the Cubs nearly blowing a 3-1 lead but holding on to take the final Game 7, setting up Cubs-Astros in the World Series, the city of Chicago nearly exploding at the thought of going back to back after waiting 50 million years for just one. Could Chicago do it?

The answer looked like no. Jon Lester looked like the former Oakland A great that he is, notching a Game 1 win despite 3 Astro home runs. But that’s where the party seemed to end for Chicago. First, Carlos Correa’s solo shot the 8th inning of Game 2 provided the difference in a 1-0 game to make it 1-1 going back to Houston. Then, the Astros made it a bash party at home, winning back to back game to take a 3-1 lead.

Ah, the 3-1 lead. The most cursed lead in all of sports. You know who knows about curses? The Chicago Cubs.

Undeterred, Oakland legend Jon Lester picked up his second win of the series on the road to send it back to Wrigley. Then, a 4 run sixth was enough for a 4-2 win in Game 6, sending it to a final Game 7 for the second consecutive year.

The Billy Goats jumped ahead early, scoring in the second and third to go up 2-0 on Houston starter Collin McHugh. But ‘Guy Everybody Thought Was A Disappointment For A Sec There’ Jake Arrieta would allow them to equalize with a 2 run seventh of their own off a Yulieski (Yulieski? I miss the good ol days of Yuniesky) Guriel 2 run shot. So to the tenth we go.

Wade Davis was on top of it in the top half. Will’y mo’ Harris was not, hitting a batter and allowing the walkoff single to World Series MVP Starling Marte. Cubs win, again, and our national disaster of year old babies never having seen the Cubs win a World Series is finally over!

Around the rest of the league, the Angels missed the playoffs by a game, proving Mike Trout will never, ever, have nice things, while the Yankees and Red Sox both finished below .500. The White Sox were as awful and disgraceful as it gets, losing 101 games in a very generous act of solidarity to the Phillies in the NL, who also lost 101. The Indians won 113 (!!!) games, mainly cause the Central was horrible. Maybe the OOTP sims weren't so inaccurate after all...

The Braves also missed the playoffs by a game, while the Cubs led the NL with 100 wins. The Mets and Dodgers followed up with 96. Nobody taught the rest of the NL sharing or commiseration (shout Tom DeLonge for teaching me that word) with the last place Phillies, cause the next worst team behind them was the Padres with 92 losses.

Now on to learn more about the last place team to come...