I agree that to much of the "gaming world" realism is probably an afterthought, heck, just play an online game of NHL09. The players that win the most try to play as unrealistic as possible or try to take advantage of a couple programming mistakes.
On that note, other than arenas, can you honestly say that NHL2K has better presentation than any of EA Sports games? The biggest knock on EA Sports before Peter Moore took over was that they get away with horrendous gameplay by making everything look pretty. Like Baa said above, the NHL2K player models are pretty bad. If you look closely at the two pictures in my previous post, the players don't even look THAT much different, save for the new
sheen on the 2K10 graphics and the incorporation of player faces and high definition. The player models is one of the reasons I cannot stay interested in NHL2K. I can't get into it. You could draw a parallel to the FIFA/Pro Evolution dichotomy on the PS2. FIFA had all of the licensed teams and looked fantastic, but played like mud. Pro Evo on the other hand had few team licenses but the gameplay engine was unreal, plus you could customize everything. If 2K's gameplay was above and beyond NHL, then perhaps I could give it more time, but truth be told, it is not. It is unfathomable that they still have not moved shooting to the Right Stick. EA made an innovation there and hit pay dirt, there is no shame in copying.
And back to your original point, I would imagine the "pick up and play" factor is huge to game sales. I think this makes NHL10 even more appealing when you consider how much customization they have provided this year. Want to play a video game that tries to mimic real life hockey? Great, adjust the settings to Hardcore/Superstar, after that, if there is something you don't like, adjust the sliders. Want to play a fast, end to end, high scoring, hard checking game of arcade hockey? Great, adjust the settings to Rookie/Casual.
I understand that people have different preferences and that they may enjoy and have a higher priority for certain things. That is great and what makes the ability to choose fantastic. I start taking issue when people start to lose focus on what this is all really about, having a fun time.