Evil Plan: (Evil with a Purpose)

Fritz · 05-26-2004, 12:03 PM

A good day for a new evil plan.

Today we will help our friend Easy Mac with an EVIL PLAN. The eventaul object of this EVIL PLAN is to make his room mate change his thermostat ways.

As always,

no dola posting
no naming any member (except Easy Mac in this case)
keep all of the hot button issues (politics, Iraq, religion, homosexuality, etc) out of the thread
no undoing another step
no multiple steps in a single post

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Step 1: Soak Easy Macs roommates (hereafter known as EMR) sheets in peanut oil and apply glitter.

WSUCougar · 05-26-2004, 12:05 PM

Step 2: Buy a surplus Sno-Cone machine and vent the sucker into the roommates' room.

rkmsuf · 05-26-2004, 12:06 PM

Step 3: Insert EMR toothbrushes in bad place(not yours). Return to normal resting positions.

**this is just for kicks since this doesn't fix the thermostat problem.

Franklinnoble · 05-26-2004, 12:06 PM

Step 4: Purchase red, white, and blue speedo. Preferably one or two sizes too small.

Fritz · 05-26-2004, 12:11 PM

Step 5: take the sacred cloth off the Evil Pan

Franklinnoble · 05-26-2004, 12:12 PM

Step 6: Find out what the hell the "Evil Pan" is, and why it was covered with a sacred cloth in the first place.

SirFozzie · 05-26-2004, 12:14 PM

7: Eat the Sacred Cloth (we need the fiber for EVIL!)

cuervo72 · 05-26-2004, 12:14 PM

Step 7: Apply Evil Pan to the thermostat.

digamma · 05-26-2004, 12:15 PM

Step 7: Build pyre with chop sticks in middle of roommate's room, surrounding pyre with ceremonial colorless m&m's and draping pyre with sacred cloth.

Fritz · 05-26-2004, 12:17 PM

(evil plan mod note: digramma is truely evil. I approve.)

WSUCougar · 05-26-2004, 12:20 PM

Step 7d: Install two dozen hidden speakers and tap them into loop recording of "It's a Small World" theme song. Leave for 2-week vacation.

Fritz · 05-26-2004, 12:24 PM

(evil plan mod note: this is getting EVIL)

corbes · 05-26-2004, 12:28 PM

step 7e: Upon return from two-week vacation, any time EMR attempts to speak to you, reply with "It's a small world after all."

Raven Hawk · 05-26-2004, 12:33 PM

Step 8: Have Ed McMahon look-alike visit house in your absence proclaiming that EMR has won the Publisher's Clearing House Sweepstakes and ask how to spell "Fucktart" for purposes of writing the check.

Franklinnoble · 05-26-2004, 12:46 PM

Step 9: Take an"upper decker" in EMR's toilet.

corbes · 05-26-2004, 01:46 PM

Step 10: Fill out "Contact Me!" request form at Amway with EMR's contact information.

Easy Mac · 05-26-2004, 01:51 PM

Step 11: After filling out the contact info, grab 23 ball point pens, a sheep, and a knife. Gut the sheep and empty out the ink of the pens. drain the blood of the sheep into each of the ball point pens. Give them to roommate and inform him it is cool to keep pens in the shirt pocket... then go get some spaghetti sauce and pour it into the dead sheep... then leave the dead sheep on top of his 1967 Mustang with the top down.

Easy Mac · 05-26-2004, 01:54 PM

no, thats one step

WSUCougar · 05-26-2004, 01:54 PM

Step 12: Start calling EMR "Lamb Chop" all the time.

Easy Mac · 05-26-2004, 01:54 PM

Step 13: Have a sing-a-long with the Telletubies and air it on FoxNews.

rkmsuf · 05-26-2004, 01:57 PM

Step 14: Modify EMR Boggle game to have all vowel cubes.

WSUCougar · 05-26-2004, 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Easy Mac

Step 13: Have a sing-a-long with the Telletubies and air it on FoxNews.

Step 15: Tell all the girls that EMR has a "Tinky Winky."

The Afoci · 05-26-2004, 01:59 PM

Step 16: Play the song I believe in a thing called love by the Darkness when only EM and EMR are in the apartment. EM shall be only slightly clothed and dance like a white man with a stick in his ass. Air Guitar solos as needed.

Airhog · 05-26-2004, 02:32 PM

Step 17: Get rid of Fritz for not being evil enough!

The Afoci · 05-26-2004, 02:42 PM

Step 18: Put gay porn by the thermostat after turning it way down. When he approaches it, taunt him, take pictures and spread them around showing everyone his love for gay porn.

cuervo72 · 05-26-2004, 02:53 PM

Step 19: X-10.

Fritz · 05-26-2004, 02:54 PM

(Evil Plan Mod note: how fucking stupid do you have to be violate "no naming any member (except Easy Mac in this case)"?)

cuervo72 · 05-26-2004, 02:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fritz

(Evil Plan Mod note: how fucking stupid do you have to be violate "no naming any member (except Easy Mac in this case)"?)

I called out a member for this in one of the previous evil plans, and got no justice....

WSUCougar · 05-26-2004, 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cuervo72

I pulled out a member for this in one of the previous evil plans, and got no justice....

Wha...?!?

Fritz · 05-26-2004, 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cuervo72

I called out a member for this in one of the previous evil plans, and got no justice....

good EVIL hates a bad whiner

suck it up doughboy

Bonegavel · 05-26-2004, 03:07 PM

Step 20: JUST TELL THE MOTHER FUCKER TO MOTHER FUCKING PUT ON A FUCKING SWEAT-MOTHER-FUCKING-ER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111

[edit]
forgot an extra 1 at the end.

The Afoci · 05-26-2004, 03:07 PM

Step 20: When ever EMR has his lady over, leave raw meat all over to ensure that the fat bitch will only eat and provide no pleasure for him.

Fritz · 05-26-2004, 09:02 PM

step 21: Phermones, bees, underpants

Franklinnoble · 05-27-2004, 02:18 AM

Step 22: Purchase a salt water fishtank no smaller than 30 gallons, and 5 live lobsters.

stevew · 05-27-2004, 02:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raven Hawk

Step 8: Have Ed McMahon look-alike visit house in your absence proclaiming that EMR has won the Publisher's Clearing House Sweepstakes and ask how to spell "Fucktart" for purposes of writing the check.

I thought it was "FuckTARD." Like "you are a Fucking Retard"

Bonegavel · 05-27-2004, 08:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevew

I thought it was "FuckTARD." Like "you are a Fucking Retard"

22.1 The definition of Fucktart from section 22. Fucktarts are a new line of nutritious toaster pastries for that special somebody you h4t3.

22.11 E.g., Fritz is a Fucktart and is therefore nutritious. But don't eat him as he is a hoagie with no meat.

Fritz · 05-27-2004, 10:11 AM

(evil plan mod note: if you don't have a step to add, get the fuck out of this thread)

The Afoci · 05-27-2004, 10:56 AM

Step 23: Make sure lobsters aren't overgrown pubic lice this time.

Fritz · 05-27-2004, 11:03 AM

(evil plan mod note: clearly there are some people who are much stupider than they appear, which would even amaze JonInMiddleGA)

JAG · 05-27-2004, 11:11 AM

Step 24: Wire thermostat so turning it above 70 degrees results in a 180 decibel rendition of Barney the Dinosaur's hit song "I love you, you love me"

Franklinnoble · 05-27-2004, 11:14 AM

Step 25: Train lobsters to become homicidal upon hearing Barney the Dinosaur.

The Afoci · 05-27-2004, 11:30 AM

Step 26: Buy ear plugs that will replace "I love you, you love me" with a soothing rendition Static-X's Love Dump. Prepare to dance to evil disco.

Franklinnoble · 05-27-2004, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bonegavel

22.1 The definition of Fucktart from section 22. Fucktarts are a new line of nutritious toaster pastries for that special somebody you h4t3.

22.11 E.g., Fritz is a Fucktart and is therefore nutritious. But don't eat him as he is a hoagie with no meat.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...m=fucktart&f=1

Just FYI.

Bonegavel · 05-27-2004, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Franklinnoble

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...m=fucktart&f=1

Just FYI.

I like this one better.

The Afoci · 05-27-2004, 02:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fritz

(evil plan mod note: if you don't have a step to add, get the fuck out of this thread)

.

Bonegavel · 05-27-2004, 03:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Afoci

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fritz

Originally Posted by Fritz
(evil plan mod note: if you don't have a step to add, get the fuck out of this thread)

.

27. Bamboozle with sidetracks and loose ends all the while letting ~~Fritz~~ people know he they can add people to his ignore list.

QuikSand · 05-27-2004, 03:37 PM

Step 28. Rub feet on shag carpeting to build up static electricity.

stevew · 05-27-2004, 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Franklinnoble

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...m=fucktart&f=1

Just FYI.

Yes, but there are 152 definitions of FUCKTARD

http://www.urbandictionary.com/defin...m=fucktard&f=1

The Afoci · 05-27-2004, 05:07 PM

Step 29: Design Super Hero custume to show newly found shocking ability.

Franklinnoble · 05-27-2004, 05:19 PM

Step 30: Dress up lobsters as my evil sidekicks.

05-26-2004, 12:05 PM	#2
WSUCougar Rider Of Rohan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Port Angeles, WA or Helm's Deep	Step 2: Buy a surplus Sno-Cone machine and vent the sucker into the roommates' room. __________________ It's not the years...it's the mileage.

05-26-2004, 12:06 PM	#3
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	Step 3: Insert EMR toothbrushes in bad place(not yours). Return to normal resting positions. *this is just for kicks since this doesn't fix the thermostat problem. __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales Last edited by rkmsuf : 05-26-2004 at 12:07 PM.*

05-26-2004, 12:11 PM	#5
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	Step 5: take the sacred cloth off the Evil Pan __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

05-26-2004, 12:14 PM	#7
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	7: Eat the Sacred Cloth (we need the fiber for EVIL!) __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

05-26-2004, 12:14 PM	#8
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	Step 7: Apply Evil Pan to the thermostat. __________________ null

05-26-2004, 12:06 PM	#4
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	Step 4: Purchase red, white, and blue speedo. Preferably one or two sizes too small.

05-26-2004, 12:12 PM	#6
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	Step 6: Find out what the hell the "Evil Pan" is, and why it was covered with a sacred cloth in the first place.

05-26-2004, 12:15 PM	#9
digamma Torchbearer Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: On Lake Harriet	Step 7: Build pyre with chop sticks in middle of roommate's room, surrounding pyre with ceremonial colorless m&m's and draping pyre with sacred cloth.

05-26-2004, 12:17 PM	#10
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	(evil plan mod note: digramma is truely evil. I approve.) __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

05-26-2004, 12:20 PM	#11
WSUCougar Rider Of Rohan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Port Angeles, WA or Helm's Deep	Step 7d: Install two dozen hidden speakers and tap them into loop recording of "It's a Small World" theme song. Leave for 2-week vacation. __________________ It's not the years...it's the mileage. Last edited by WSUCougar : 05-26-2004 at 12:25 PM.

05-26-2004, 12:24 PM	#12
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	(evil plan mod note: this is getting EVIL) __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

05-26-2004, 12:28 PM	#13
corbes College Benchwarmer Join Date: Nov 2003	step 7e: Upon return from two-week vacation, any time EMR attempts to speak to you, reply with "It's a small world after all." Last edited by corbes : 05-26-2004 at 12:29 PM.

05-26-2004, 12:33 PM	#14
Raven Hawk College Starter Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Thunderdome	Step 8: Have Ed McMahon look-alike visit house in your absence proclaiming that EMR has won the Publisher's Clearing House Sweepstakes and ask how to spell "Fucktart" for purposes of writing the check. __________________ Owner of The Shreveport Pride in The CFL

05-26-2004, 12:46 PM	#15
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	Step 9: Take an"upper decker" in EMR's toilet.

05-26-2004, 01:46 PM	#16
corbes College Benchwarmer Join Date: Nov 2003	Step 10: Fill out "Contact Me!" request form at Amway with EMR's contact information.

05-26-2004, 01:51 PM	#17
Easy Mac Registered User Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Here	Step 11: After filling out the contact info, grab 23 ball point pens, a sheep, and a knife. Gut the sheep and empty out the ink of the pens. drain the blood of the sheep into each of the ball point pens. Give them to roommate and inform him it is cool to keep pens in the shirt pocket... then go get some spaghetti sauce and pour it into the dead sheep... then leave the dead sheep on top of his 1967 Mustang with the top down.

05-26-2004, 01:54 PM	#18
Easy Mac Registered User Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Here	no, thats one step

05-26-2004, 01:57 PM	#21
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	Step 14: Modify EMR Boggle game to have all vowel cubes. __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

05-26-2004, 01:59 PM	#23
The Afoci Pro Rookie Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Moorhead	Step 16: Play the song I believe in a thing called love by the Darkness when only EM and EMR are in the apartment. EM shall be only slightly clothed and dance like a white man with a stick in his ass. Air Guitar solos as needed. __________________ I had something. Last edited by The Afoci : 05-26-2004 at 02:08 PM.

05-26-2004, 02:32 PM	#24
Airhog Captain Obvious Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Norman, Oklahoma	Step 17: Get rid of Fritz for not being evil enough! __________________ Thread Killer extraordinaire Yay! its football season once again!

05-26-2004, 02:42 PM	#25
The Afoci Pro Rookie Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Moorhead	Step 18: Put gay porn by the thermostat after turning it way down. When he approaches it, taunt him, take pictures and spread them around showing everyone his love for gay porn. __________________ I had something.

05-26-2004, 02:53 PM	#26
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	Step 19: X-10. __________________ null

05-26-2004, 02:54 PM	#27
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	(Evil Plan Mod note: how fucking stupid do you have to be violate "no naming any member (except Easy Mac in this case)"?) __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

05-26-2004, 03:07 PM	#31
Bonegavel Awaiting Further Instructions... Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Macungie, PA	Step 20: JUST TELL THE MOTHER FUCKER TO MOTHER FUCKING PUT ON A FUCKING SWEAT-MOTHER-FUCKING-ER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111 [edit] forgot an extra 1 at the end. Last edited by Bonegavel : 05-26-2004 at 03:09 PM.

05-26-2004, 09:02 PM	#33
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	step 21: Phermones, bees, underpants __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

05-27-2004, 02:18 AM	#34
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	Step 22: Purchase a salt water fishtank no smaller than 30 gallons, and 5 live lobsters.

05-27-2004, 10:11 AM	#37
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	(evil plan mod note: if you don't have a step to add, get the fuck out of this thread) __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

05-27-2004, 10:56 AM	#38
The Afoci Pro Rookie Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Moorhead	Step 23: Make sure lobsters aren't overgrown pubic lice this time. __________________ I had something.

05-27-2004, 11:03 AM	#39
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	(evil plan mod note: clearly there are some people who are much stupider than they appear, which would even amaze JonInMiddleGA) __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

05-27-2004, 11:11 AM	#40
JAG Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: St. Paul, MN	Step 24: Wire thermostat so turning it above 70 degrees results in a 180 decibel rendition of Barney the Dinosaur's hit song "I love you, you love me"

05-27-2004, 11:14 AM	#41
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	Step 25: Train lobsters to become homicidal upon hearing Barney the Dinosaur.

05-27-2004, 11:30 AM	#42
The Afoci Pro Rookie Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Moorhead	Step 26: Buy ear plugs that will replace "I love you, you love me" with a soothing rendition Static-X's Love Dump. Prepare to dance to evil disco. __________________ I had something.

05-27-2004, 03:37 PM	#47
QuikSand lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Annapolis, Md	Step 28. Rub feet on shag carpeting to build up static electricity. Last edited by QuikSand : 05-27-2004 at 03:38 PM.

05-27-2004, 05:07 PM	#49
The Afoci Pro Rookie Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: Moorhead	Step 29: Design Super Hero custume to show newly found shocking ability. __________________ I had something.

05-27-2004, 05:19 PM	#50
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	Step 30: Dress up lobsters as my evil sidekicks.