Sports Center Catch Phrases

digamma · 08-18-2004, 12:58 PM

So, a friend of mine found out last night he is a finalist for the second season of ESPN's Dream Job.

In informal feedback, he's been told that highlights and catch phrases are his relative weak spot. (By comparison, he's been told that on camera presence, interviewing and sports knowledge are relatively stronger.)

Anyone have any catch phrase (or related highlight) suggestions?

So far, we've come up with:

"To quote Nicole Ritchie, 'That's hot.'"

"And all the message board guys go scurrying to their computers."

"Nomar: More pop-ups than an infected web browser."

"Sergei Bubka!!!" (Not my own, but I kind of like it.)

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 01:00 PM

I'd buy that for a dollar!

SirFozzie · 08-18-2004, 01:05 PM

"He's into it like a cat at a mouse convention"

"If this was Batman, there'd be a word balloon saying "WHAMMO!" after that swing."

cthomer5000 · 08-18-2004, 01:08 PM

"Where's my 2 dollars!?!"

"Donna Martin graduates!"

"Always bet on black"

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 01:09 PM

Man the White Sox need more cowbell.

JasonC23 · 08-18-2004, 01:10 PM

"You can put it on the board...YYYEESS!!"

(For rkmsuf and everyone who posted in the "Worst MLB Announcers" thread.)

LastWhiteSoxFanStanding · 08-18-2004, 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JasonC23

"You can put it on the board...YYYEESS!!"

(For rkmsuf and everyone who posted in the "Worst MLB Announcers" thread.)

Amen, brother.

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 01:14 PM

"That ball got out of here faster than Kirstie Alley get's to the dinner table."

albionmoonlight · 08-18-2004, 01:14 PM

"Good Old Rock. Nothing Beats Rock."

(For when he is doing Rock, Paper, Sissors highlights)

Swaggs · 08-18-2004, 01:18 PM

"Asshat!"

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 01:20 PM

"There's no trout in HIS rectum!"

digamma · 08-18-2004, 01:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cthomer5000

"Donna Martin graduates!"

I like this one...and it brings to mind something like...
"He looks more out of place than Gabrielle Carteris playing a high school student."

sovereignstar · 08-18-2004, 01:24 PM

Like I told Lindsay Lohan, I'm - just - not - buying - it!

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 01:27 PM

He charged that ball like a rhino

Honolulu_Blue · 08-18-2004, 01:41 PM

Sweet Sassy Molassy!

korme · 08-18-2004, 01:42 PM

thats more dongs than a gangbang porno

k0ruptr · 08-18-2004, 01:45 PM

someone call peter north, cause thats a shot!

Ksyrup · 08-18-2004, 02:08 PM

We need some catch phrases that involve SC personalities, to endear the contestant to his potential co-workers. Kinda like an SC version of David Spade's Hollywood Minute. Seriously, how great would that be, if one guy burned his chance to win by insulting half of the crew before he got voted/yanked off?

In response to a beaning:

"Ouch! That one hurt. Tests have confirmed that [Player X] lost more brain cells as a result of that beaning than Rob Dibble has ever had."

Or:

"Although the injury appeared to be significant, the team's trainer confirmed that the bruise was only a fraction of the size of Dan Patrick's ego."

Or:

"The game ended on a lazy eyeball to centerfielder Andruw Jones. Back to you, Stu."

I would pay to watch that show.

k0ruptr · 08-18-2004, 02:09 PM

haha good idea

SirFozzie · 08-18-2004, 02:12 PM

Ungawa!

Franklinnoble · 08-18-2004, 02:13 PM

Dat boy run so fast he makes your dick hard...

Ksyrup · 08-18-2004, 02:16 PM

I'll pay your buddy $100 if he works the name "Mr. Nibbles" into an on-air spot.

JeeberD · 08-18-2004, 02:17 PM

Jeeber-licious!

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 02:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ksyrup

I'll pay your buddy $100 if he works the name "Mr. Nibbles" into an on-air spot.

The next Tyson fight would be the perfect spot.

PsychoCop · 08-18-2004, 02:21 PM

"bada-bing, bada-bang, bada-boom."

"He's like a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest"

"That's felony assault anywhere inside the United States... but not in this game, because real men play this game."

"oooh... someone hand him his ruby slippers, because he's going home!"

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 02:30 PM

"I want bush; pan down."

digamma · 08-18-2004, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ksyrup

I'll pay your buddy $100 if he works the name "Mr. Nibbles" into an on-air spot.

We've got to get him on air first, but I'll try to make this happen if he gets there.

sterlingice · 08-18-2004, 02:34 PM

How about not just doing stupid catch phrases as that's part of what makes Sportscenter sound dumb these days: forced catch phrases that aren't natural and just seem artificial.

SI

Maple Leafs · 08-18-2004, 02:38 PM

"That game was more one-sided than Lance Armstrong's scrotum!"

JeeberD · 08-18-2004, 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sterlingice

How about not just doing stupid catch phrases as that's part of what makes Sportscenter sound dumb these days: forced catch phrases that aren't natural and just seem artificial.

Quote:

Originally Posted by digamma

In informal feedback, he's been told that highlights and catch phrases are his relative weak spot.

Sounds like they want catch phrases from him...

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 02:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maple Leafs

"That game was more one-sided than Lance Armstrong's scrotum!"

that's good

bbor · 08-18-2004, 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maple Leafs

"That game was more one-sided than Lance Armstrong's scrotum!"

It is alarming to me that ML is sitting in his office thinking of a catch phrase that goes with Lance Armstrongs scrotum.

Huckleberry · 08-18-2004, 02:55 PM

Sounds like your friend is exactly what SportsCenter needs as is.

But in the spirit of helping:

For a long home run: "I think he'll call that one the masturbator."

For a mid-range jumper in an NBA game: "HOLY SHIT!!!"

When a receiver makes a big demonstration after a simple catch: "S T F U!!!"

Just some ideas.

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 02:58 PM

"Great defense by Team USA. A sight more rare than a colossel squid."

Blackadar · 08-18-2004, 03:08 PM

For pretty much anything, but it would be my home run call...

Stop your grinnin' and drop your linen!!!

kcchief19 · 08-18-2004, 03:21 PM

My catch phrase for when a guard penetrates the lane and drives to the hoop is, "He's an amoeba -- he moves to light!"

Not much of a catch phrase.

rkmsuf · 08-18-2004, 03:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kcchief19

My catch phrase for when a guard penetrates the lane and drives to the hoop is, "He's an amoeba -- he moves to light!"

Not much of a catch phrase.

that is so "geek"

"These teams went at it like crickets in Hong Kong."

Franklinnoble · 08-18-2004, 03:23 PM

Well, spank my ass and call me "Charlie."

Ksyrup · 08-18-2004, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Franklinnoble

Well, spank my ass and call me "Charlie."

This is on the ESPN radio station promos I hear. Not sure if that's from ESPN itself, or the locals, but it's already associated with ESPN in some way.

Franklinnoble · 08-18-2004, 03:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ksyrup

This is on the ESPN radio station promos I hear. Not sure if that's from ESPN itself, or the locals, but it's already associated with ESPN in some way.

It's from South Park, originally. I had no idea ESPN radio was using it.

How about:

The Ladies' Man recommends you try doing it in the butt...

sterlingice · 08-18-2004, 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeeberD

Sounds like they want catch phrases from him...

I get that. But giving him more weak ones doesn't help his case.

SI

Ksyrup · 08-18-2004, 03:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Franklinnoble

It's from South Park, originally. I had no idea ESPN radio was using it.

How about:

The Ladies' Man recommends you try doing it in the butt...

Yeah, I know. They use the direct SP clip. Maybe it's just the local ESPN radio station's promo - I don't know.

judicial clerk · 08-18-2004, 04:01 PM

When a sports figure express displeasure with a referee's decision "hey,[insert name] T.S."

for general use "Bukkake!!"

"I got nuthin"

Ksyrup · 08-18-2004, 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by judicial clerk

"I got nuthin"

This wouldn't be a bad phrase as "he got nuthin" when a guy strikes out or drops a pass or plays for the USA Olympic basketball team.

Ksyrup · 08-18-2004, 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sterlingice

I get that. But giving him more weak ones doesn't help his case.

SI

Oh no, the minute this thread went up, it was all about us, not him.

cthomer5000 · 08-18-2004, 04:14 PM

"He exploded like AC Green on his honeymoon!"

Bad-example · 08-18-2004, 11:48 PM

No catch phrases to offer up, but I do think that if he chose to always refer to the suicide squeeze as a killer kegel it would help.

MikeVic · 08-18-2004, 11:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cthomer5000

"He exploded like AC Green on his honeymoon!"

As for me, "He took a hit harder than Charles Oakley after winning the NBA Title!"

... I don't know, whatever...

Suicane75 · 08-19-2004, 02:49 AM

"uglier than Paris Hiltons vagina"

Ragone · 08-19-2004, 04:03 AM

Lets say the highlight is Danny Graves giving up a homer to bonds

catch phrase "Have you seen my baseball?"

08-18-2004, 01:00 PM	#2
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	I'd buy that for a dollar! __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

08-18-2004, 01:05 PM	#3
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	"He's into it like a cat at a mouse convention" "If this was Batman, there'd be a word balloon saying "WHAMMO!" after that swing." __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

08-18-2004, 01:09 PM	#5
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	Man the White Sox need more cowbell. __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

08-18-2004, 01:10 PM	#6
JasonC23 High School Varsity Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Huntley, IL, USA	"You can put it on the board...YYYEESS!!" (For rkmsuf and everyone who posted in the "Worst MLB Announcers" thread.) __________________ "I'm A god. I'm not THE God...I don't think." Bill Murray, Groundhog Day

08-18-2004, 01:14 PM	#8
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	"That ball got out of here faster than Kirstie Alley get's to the dinner table." __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

08-18-2004, 01:14 PM	#9
albionmoonlight Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: North Carolina	"Good Old Rock. Nothing Beats Rock." (For when he is doing Rock, Paper, Sissors highlights)

08-18-2004, 01:18 PM	#10
Swaggs Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000	"Asshat!" __________________ DOWN WITH HATTRICK!!! The RWBL Are you reading In The Bleachers?

08-18-2004, 01:20 PM	#11
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	"There's no trout in HIS rectum!" __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales Last edited by rkmsuf : 08-18-2004 at 01:21 PM.

08-18-2004, 01:24 PM	#13
sovereignstar Pro Starter Join Date: Feb 2004	Like I told Lindsay Lohan, I'm - just - not - buying - it!

08-18-2004, 01:27 PM	#14
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	He charged that ball like a rhino __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

08-18-2004, 01:41 PM	#15
Honolulu_Blue Hockey Boy Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Royal Oak, MI	Sweet Sassy Molassy!

08-18-2004, 01:42 PM	#16
korme Go Reds Join Date: May 2001 Location: Bloodbuzz Ohio	thats more dongs than a gangbang porno

08-18-2004, 01:45 PM	#17
k0ruptr Pro Starter Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Las Vegas	someone call peter north, cause thats a shot! __________________ Xbox Live Gamertag: k0ruptr My Favorite Teams : Chicago White Sox - Carolina Panthers - Orlando Magic - Phoenix Suns - Anaheim Ducks - Hawaii Warriors - Oregon Ducks

08-18-2004, 02:08 PM	#18
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	We need some catch phrases that involve SC personalities, to endear the contestant to his potential co-workers. Kinda like an SC version of David Spade's Hollywood Minute. Seriously, how great would that be, if one guy burned his chance to win by insulting half of the crew before he got voted/yanked off? In response to a beaning: "Ouch! That one hurt. Tests have confirmed that [Player X] lost more brain cells as a result of that beaning than Rob Dibble has ever had." Or: "Although the injury appeared to be significant, the team's trainer confirmed that the bruise was only a fraction of the size of Dan Patrick's ego." Or: "The game ended on a lazy eyeball to centerfielder Andruw Jones. Back to you, Stu." I would pay to watch that show. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete." Last edited by Ksyrup : 08-18-2004 at 02:08 PM.

08-18-2004, 02:09 PM	#19
k0ruptr Pro Starter Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Las Vegas	haha good idea __________________ Xbox Live Gamertag: k0ruptr My Favorite Teams : Chicago White Sox - Carolina Panthers - Orlando Magic - Phoenix Suns - Anaheim Ducks - Hawaii Warriors - Oregon Ducks

08-18-2004, 02:12 PM	#20
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	Ungawa! __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

08-18-2004, 02:13 PM	#21
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	Dat boy run so fast he makes your dick hard...

08-18-2004, 02:16 PM	#22
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	I'll pay your buddy $100 if he works the name "Mr. Nibbles" into an on-air spot. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

08-18-2004, 02:17 PM	#23
JeeberD General Manager Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The Town of Flower Mound	Jeeber-licious! __________________ UTEP Miners!!! I solemnly swear to never cheer for TO

08-18-2004, 02:21 PM	#25
PsychoCop Mascot Join Date: Mar 2002	"bada-bing, bada-bang, bada-boom." "He's like a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest" "That's felony assault anywhere inside the United States... but not in this game, because real men play this game." "oooh... someone hand him his ruby slippers, because he's going home!" __________________ Whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when I come for you? Last edited by PsychoCop : 08-18-2004 at 02:24 PM.

08-18-2004, 02:30 PM	#26
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	"I want bush; pan down." __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

08-18-2004, 02:34 PM	#28
sterlingice Hall Of Famer Join Date: Apr 2002 Location: Back in Houston!	How about not just doing stupid catch phrases as that's part of what makes Sportscenter sound dumb these days: forced catch phrases that aren't natural and just seem artificial. SI __________________ Houston Hippopotami, III.3: 20th Anniversary Thread - All former HT players are encouraged to check it out! Janos: "Only America could produce an imbecile of your caliber!" Freakazoid: "That's because we make lots of things better than other people!"

08-18-2004, 02:38 PM	#29
Maple Leafs Coordinator Join Date: Jan 2002	"That game was more one-sided than Lance Armstrong's scrotum!" __________________ Down Goes Brown: Toronto Maple Leafs Humor and Analysis

08-18-2004, 02:55 PM	#33
Huckleberry College Starter Join Date: Dec 2001	Sounds like your friend is exactly what SportsCenter needs as is. But in the spirit of helping: For a long home run: "I think he'll call that one the masturbator." For a mid-range jumper in an NBA game: "HOLY SHIT!!!" When a receiver makes a big demonstration after a simple catch: "S T F U!!!" Just some ideas. __________________ The one thing all your failed relationships have in common is you. The Barking Carnival (Longhorn-centered sports blog) College Football Adjusted Stats and Ratings

08-18-2004, 02:58 PM	#34
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	"Great defense by Team USA. A sight more rare than a colossel squid." __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

08-18-2004, 03:08 PM	#35
Blackadar Retired Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Fantasyland	For pretty much anything, but it would be my home run call... Stop your grinnin' and drop your linen!!!

08-18-2004, 03:21 PM	#36
kcchief19 Pro Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Kansas City, MO	My catch phrase for when a guard penetrates the lane and drives to the hoop is, "He's an amoeba -- he moves to light!" Not much of a catch phrase.

08-18-2004, 03:23 PM	#38
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	Well, spank my ass and call me "Charlie."

08-18-2004, 04:01 PM	#43
judicial clerk College Benchwarmer Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Portland, OR	When a sports figure express displeasure with a referee's decision "hey,[insert name] T.S." for general use "Bukkake!!" "I got nuthin"

08-18-2004, 11:48 PM	#47
Bad-example College Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: san jose CA	No catch phrases to offer up, but I do think that if he chose to always refer to the suicide squeeze as a killer kegel it would help. __________________ Karaoke Katie drove the crowd wild Every time she'd sing they'd come in for miles Curtain came up, Katie came on Drinking like a lumberjack and singing Delta Dawn

08-19-2004, 02:49 AM	#49
Suicane75 Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: NJ	"uglier than Paris Hiltons vagina"

08-19-2004, 04:03 AM	#50
Ragone Pro Rookie Join Date: May 2002 Location: Kansas City, Mo	Lets say the highlight is Danny Graves giving up a homer to bonds catch phrase "Have you seen my baseball?"

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