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Old 10-17-2005, 09:56 AM   #1
John Galt
Pro Starter
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: The Internets
My Time in the Box

It is called the box. The hole. The pokey. The yard.

You are never really alone in the box. The sound of “It’s a Small World” blares endlessly from the box’s ancient speaker system. On the 1000th or so iteration of the song, you actually think of taking HM up on his offer to teach you what “cocky and funny” really means.

Now that the box has grown, like any prison, ugly gangs have surfaced. Not surprisingly, Mrs. Kippy is the little bitch for Bragggg’s neo-nazis. Capsicum plays the Fairuza Balk character for the group. While I was in the box, the Nazis started a race rivalry with Blackie. Upon being told that Blackie was not actually black, Mrs. Kippy just replied, “there is no color in the box - just butt rape.”

I tried to keep to myself and avoid trouble. But Hell Atlantic managed to get some Wild Turkey smuggled into FOFC’s prison. We all know what happens when HA is drunk and thankfully, I was able to resist his many attempts to “piss in my ass hole.”

The saddest case in the whole joint was clearly Happy29. He still has not accepted his banning. He just spends hours upon hours playing Yeti baseball while muttering “fuckin’ dark jedi.”

The one thing that kept my spirits up was a little scrawled graffiti in my cell. It said, “Franklinnoble was here - tap your foot twice at 4:30 to do it Ladies Man style.”

And so, after three days, I have emerged from the box. I lost 37 lbs., 4 teeth, and will never, ever, go near the “It’s a Small World” ride again. It's good to be back.
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:57 AM   #2
vtbub
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*applauds*
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:58 AM   #3
Raiders Army
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: The Black Hole
I thought it was Mr. Skippy not Mrs. Kippy. Welcome back.
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Old 10-17-2005, 09:59 AM   #4
digamma
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Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: On Lake Harriet
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raiders Army
I thought it was Mr. Skippy not Mrs. Kippy. Welcome back.

Nah, been Mrs. Kippy as long as I've known him.
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:00 AM   #5
Subby
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: sans pants
If boxing you is what it took to produce this gem, then I think your punishment was well worth it.
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:02 AM   #6
Honolulu_Blue
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Royal Oak, MI
Quote:
Originally Posted by Subby
If boxing you is what it took to produce this gem, then I think your punishment was well worth it.

Agreed.
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:06 AM   #7
kcchief19
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Kansas City, MO
"It's A Small World" huh? I would have thought you'd hear that Italian lady singing in your heart.

That is without a doubt that greatest return from a boxing ever. The scary thing is, it sounds quite plausible.
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:12 AM   #8
wade moore
lolzcat
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: williamsburg, va
Quote:
Originally Posted by Honolulu_Blue
Agreed.

thirded.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Subby
Maybe I am just getting old though, but I am learning to not let perfect be the enemy of the very good...
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:17 AM   #9
albionmoonlight
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: North Carolina
Awesome. We should all go on a box fieldtrip one day. Open up one sub-forum where all the banned members can post for a day and we can watch. That would be great fun.
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:19 AM   #10
KevinNU7
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Join Date: May 2003
Location: Beantown
Thumbs up

Quote:
Originally Posted by albionmoonlight
Awesome. We should all go on a box fieldtrip one day. Open up one sub-forum where all the banned members can post for a day and we can watch. That would be great fun.
yes please
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:25 AM   #11
NoMyths
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Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Charleston, SC
hehehe
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:30 AM   #12
panerd
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: St. Louis
Quote:
Originally Posted by albionmoonlight
Awesome. We should all go on a box fieldtrip one day. Open up one sub-forum where all the banned members can post for a day and we can watch. That would be great fun.

Isn't that what Hell Atlantic's website is for?
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:34 AM   #13
sachmo71
The boy who cried Trout
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: TX
nicely done, mr gault.
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:48 AM   #14
MizzouRah
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Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Troy, Mo
Who says rehabilitation doesn't work?

Last edited by MizzouRah : 10-17-2005 at 10:49 AM.
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Old 10-17-2005, 10:50 AM   #15
sovereignstar
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Hasn't this been done before?
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Old 10-17-2005, 11:15 AM   #16
stevew
Hall Of Famer
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: the yo'
Quote:
Originally Posted by sovereignstar
Hasn't this been done before?

Yeah, ChristStomper did it when his name was FranklinNoble.
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Old 10-17-2005, 11:28 AM   #17
Young Drachma
Dark Cloud
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Still, good work. Welcome back. I'm sure you put on a ton of bulk from working out in the gym.

Last edited by Young Drachma : 10-17-2005 at 11:28 AM.
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Old 10-17-2005, 11:36 AM   #18
Ben E Lou
Morgado's Favorite Forum Fascist
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Greensboro, NC
Quote:
Originally Posted by John Galt
It is called the box. The hole. The pokey. The yard.

You are never really alone in the box. The sound of “It’s a Small World” blares endlessly from the box’s ancient speaker system. On the 1000th or so iteration of the song, you actually think of taking HM up on his offer to teach you what “cocky and funny” really means.

Now that the box has grown, like any prison, ugly gangs have surfaced. Not surprisingly, Mrs. Kippy is the little bitch for Bragggg’s neo-nazis. Capsicum plays the Fairuza Balk character for the group. While I was in the box, the Nazis started a race rivalry with Blackie. Upon being told that Blackie was not actually black, Mrs. Kippy just replied, “there is no color in the box - just butt rape.”

I tried to keep to myself and avoid trouble. But Hell Atlantic managed to get some Wild Turkey smuggled into FOFC’s prison. We all know what happens when HA is drunk and thankfully, I was able to resist his many attempts to “piss in my ass hole.”

The saddest case in the whole joint was clearly Happy29. He still has not accepted his banning. He just spends hours upon hours playing Yeti baseball while muttering “fuckin’ dark jedi.”

The one thing that kept my spirits up was a little scrawled graffiti in my cell. It said, “Franklinnoble was here - tap your foot twice at 4:30 to do it Ladies Man style.”

And so, after three days, I have emerged from the box. I lost 37 lbs., 4 teeth, and will never, ever, go near the “It’s a Small World” ride again. It's good to be back.
Point of clarification, as I've noticed a few people have gotten this one wrong recently: It was mrskippy, not Happy29, who uttered the infamous, "I will not accept a banning."
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Old 10-17-2005, 02:31 PM   #19
John Galt
Pro Starter
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: The Internets
Quote:
Originally Posted by sovereignstar
Hasn't this been done before?

I think it has become a somewhat informal tradition for people leaving the box. I don't know if that means it has been "done before."
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Old 10-17-2005, 02:31 PM   #20
John Galt
Pro Starter
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: The Internets
Quote:
Originally Posted by SkyDog
Point of clarification, as I've noticed a few people have gotten this one wrong recently: It was mrskippy, not Happy29, who uttered the infamous, "I will not accept a banning."

Damn it. Oh well. The rest of my story stands as is.
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Old 10-17-2005, 02:35 PM   #21
rkmsuf
Head Coach
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Quote:
Originally Posted by John Galt
I think it has become a somewhat informal tradition for people leaving the box. I don't know if that means it has been "done before."

I did it as well. This one is funny regardless of whether it's been done before.
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Old 10-17-2005, 03:22 PM   #22
Young Drachma
Dark Cloud
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
So is there a Golden Scribe in this category yet?
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Old 10-18-2005, 01:09 AM   #23
daedalus
Pro Rookie
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Welcome back, JG.
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Old 10-18-2005, 01:15 AM   #24
Axxon
Pro Starter
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Quote:
Originally Posted by John Galt
It is called the box. The hole. The pokey. The yard.

You are never really alone in the box. The sound of “It’s a Small World” blares endlessly from the box’s ancient speaker system. On the 1000th or so iteration of the song, you actually think of taking HM up on his offer to teach you what “cocky and funny” really means.

Now that the box has grown, like any prison, ugly gangs have surfaced. Not surprisingly, Mrs. Kippy is the little bitch for Bragggg’s neo-nazis. Capsicum plays the Fairuza Balk character for the group. While I was in the box, the Nazis started a race rivalry with Blackie. Upon being told that Blackie was not actually black, Mrs. Kippy just replied, “there is no color in the box - just butt rape.”

I tried to keep to myself and avoid trouble. But Hell Atlantic managed to get some Wild Turkey smuggled into FOFC’s prison. We all know what happens when HA is drunk and thankfully, I was able to resist his many attempts to “piss in my ass hole.”

The saddest case in the whole joint was clearly Happy29. He still has not accepted his banning. He just spends hours upon hours playing Yeti baseball while muttering “fuckin’ dark jedi.”

The one thing that kept my spirits up was a little scrawled graffiti in my cell. It said, “Franklinnoble was here - tap your foot twice at 4:30 to do it Ladies Man style.”

And so, after three days, I have emerged from the box. I lost 37 lbs., 4 teeth, and will never, ever, go near the “It’s a Small World” ride again. It's good to be back.

Classic!

Thanks JG.
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Old 10-18-2005, 04:37 AM   #25
Izulde
Head Coach
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Quote:
Originally Posted by John Galt
It is called the box. The hole. The pokey. The yard.

You are never really alone in the box. The sound of “It’s a Small World” blares endlessly from the box’s ancient speaker system. On the 1000th or so iteration of the song, you actually think of taking HM up on his offer to teach you what “cocky and funny” really means.

Now that the box has grown, like any prison, ugly gangs have surfaced. Not surprisingly, Mrs. Kippy is the little bitch for Bragggg’s neo-nazis. Capsicum plays the Fairuza Balk character for the group. While I was in the box, the Nazis started a race rivalry with Blackie. Upon being told that Blackie was not actually black, Mrs. Kippy just replied, “there is no color in the box - just butt rape.”

I tried to keep to myself and avoid trouble. But Hell Atlantic managed to get some Wild Turkey smuggled into FOFC’s prison. We all know what happens when HA is drunk and thankfully, I was able to resist his many attempts to “piss in my ass hole.”

The saddest case in the whole joint was clearly Happy29. He still has not accepted his banning. He just spends hours upon hours playing Yeti baseball while muttering “fuckin’ dark jedi.”

The one thing that kept my spirits up was a little scrawled graffiti in my cell. It said, “Franklinnoble was here - tap your foot twice at 4:30 to do it Ladies Man style.”

And so, after three days, I have emerged from the box. I lost 37 lbs., 4 teeth, and will never, ever, go near the “It’s a Small World” ride again. It's good to be back.

Gold.Mint.Platinum.
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