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View Full Version : Why can't people make microwave popcorn without burning it (or work rant post #9257)


Suburban Rhythm
10-04-2007, 02:10 PM
Discuss

larrymcg421
10-04-2007, 02:18 PM
The problem is that people time it, which you can't do. The times on the instructions are always way too long, and it varies by microwave anyways. You have to have enough damn patience to stand at the microwave for a couple minutes and listen for when the popping slows down. When people walk away and let it cook for a minute too long, they fucking ruin the break room for everyone else.

rkmsuf
10-04-2007, 02:23 PM
I like burnt popcorn.

stevew
10-04-2007, 02:29 PM
Yeah, i used to hate it when assholes would do this as well.

Suburban Rhythm
10-04-2007, 02:32 PM
On a good note...one of the few people who comes in relatively early (7:00) with me...brought donuts in, so i snagged two before most people were even here.

BrianD
10-04-2007, 02:35 PM
The problem is that people time it, which you can't do. The times on the instructions are always way too long, and it varies by microwave anyways. You have to have enough damn patience to stand at the microwave for a couple minutes and listen for when the popping slows down. When people walk away and let it cook for a minute too long, they fucking ruin the break room for everyone else.

Timing it really isn't that hard if you do it properly. The timing will change based on the microwave, but it is always within a range of time. If it takes between 2:10 and 2:40 for the popcorn to be done, just set the microwave for 2:10. You may end up with a bit more unpopped than you'd get if you waited there, but that last little bit isn't going to change your enjoyment level.

Some of my worst popcorn burning experiences have been when I have been waiting and watching the process. Some bags get that constant rhythmic popping which continues long after the early-popped stuff turns to ash.

Fidatelo
10-04-2007, 02:39 PM
I do believe that popcorn is labeled as taint, along with McDonald's food, and therefore the offender should be shunned accordingly.

lordscarlet
10-04-2007, 02:42 PM
Speaking of patience... Yesterday my coworker microwaved a pop tart because she didn't want to wait for the toaster.

stevew
10-04-2007, 02:45 PM
At least they didn't make stanky Ramen. That shit is even worse than burnt popcorn.

Subby
10-04-2007, 02:54 PM
People overreact to it enough that now I just do it on purpose.

Young Drachma
10-04-2007, 02:59 PM
My office is far enough back that I don't usually smell it. And if I do, I close my door.

larrymcg421
10-04-2007, 03:04 PM
Timing it really isn't that hard if you do it properly. The timing will change based on the microwave, but it is always within a range of time. If it takes between 2:10 and 2:40 for the popcorn to be done, just set the microwave for 2:10. You may end up with a bit more unpopped than you'd get if you waited there, but that last little bit isn't going to change your enjoyment level.

Some of my worst popcorn burning experiences have been when I have been waiting and watching the process. Some bags get that constant rhythmic popping which continues long after the early-popped stuff turns to ash.

You don't wait for the popping to completely stop, just for it to slow down. It's true that it will pop for quite some time after it is done, but if you stop it when it starts to slow down you should be good to go.

BrianD
10-04-2007, 04:25 PM
You don't wait for the popping to completely stop, just for it to slow down. It's true that it will pop for quite some time after it is done, but if you stop it when it starts to slow down you should be good to go.

Instructions on the bags used to say it was done when it went 2 or 3 seconds without a pop. That must not be right anymore since I got charcoal when I couldn't even start counting between pops. Using a slow-down as your benchmark is probably similar to just setting the timer for the minimum time...but without the need to judge each time.

Mantle2600
10-04-2007, 05:08 PM
Better than some New York wannabe fat ass that is part Italian so he thinks he is a mobster, ordering lunch 3 times a day and getting onions, garlic or anything else that smells horrible. I hate that bastard.

Ironhead
10-04-2007, 05:10 PM
In our microwave at home it only takes about 1:40 for a full bag to pop. Like someone else said you just have to wait until you only hear about 1 or 2 kernels popping a second and then take it out.

Toddzilla
10-04-2007, 06:03 PM
Take solace in the fact that microwave popcorn causes cancer, so the assholes who are constantly eating it - and burning it - are going to die sooner, thus thinning out the workforce in a neat Darwinian fashion.

Karlifornia
10-04-2007, 07:07 PM
If you get to two full seconds between a pop, shit's done

Lathum
10-04-2007, 10:07 PM
My old office actually prohibited people from making microwave popcorn because to many morons couldn't manage it.

Karlifornia
10-04-2007, 11:01 PM
Take solace in the fact that microwave popcorn causes cancer, so the assholes who are constantly eating it - and burning it - are going to die sooner, thus thinning out the workforce in a neat Darwinian fashion.

http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d183/rfusstanford/orvilleredenbacher.jpg

Thomkal
10-05-2007, 05:55 AM
we actually have a popcorn button on our microwave at home which worked fine for the bigger bags, but we have to watch with the smaller bags as its very easy to wait too long with those.

gstelmack
10-05-2007, 08:44 AM
Things inconsiderate office workers do:

1. Put food in the microwave, then walk away for 10 minutes, then get annoyed you pulled their food out so you could heat yours up.
2. Pull food out of the microwave early and not clear the clock.
3. Don't throw away the box when they take the last donut/bagel/plastic utensil.
4. Don't erase the whiteboard after the meeting.

Greyroofoo
10-05-2007, 09:35 AM
simple answer:

make your damn popcorn.

Mota
10-05-2007, 10:25 PM
Our microwave is RIGHT beside my desk. It's horrible, especially when people warm up their stinky trout. I put a sign up asking people not to cook fish at this station and to bring it to the cafeteria, but people were all offended and I was asked to take it down. Next time someone nukes some stank fishy, I'm gonna hide a half eaten can of tuna under their desk on a Friday night and see what they think on Monday after it has been rotting for an entire weekend.

Also, everybody uses me as their time waster while they wait for their food to be cooked. "Hey I'll talk to Mota!"

Karlifornia
10-06-2007, 04:05 AM
Our microwave is RIGHT beside my desk. It's horrible, especially when people warm up their stinky trout. I put a sign up asking people not to cook fish at this station and to bring it to the cafeteria, but people were all offended and I was asked to take it down. Next time someone nukes some stank fishy, I'm gonna hide a half eaten can of tuna under their desk on a Friday night and see what they think on Monday after it has been rotting for an entire weekend.

Also, everybody uses me as their time waster while they wait for their food to be cooked. "Hey I'll talk to Mota!"

Maybe you shouldn't be a Spanish slang term for TEH EVIL MARYWANNA!

Toddzilla
10-06-2007, 08:06 AM
Our microwave is RIGHT beside my desk. It's horrible, especially when people warm up their stinky trout. I put a sign up asking people not to cook fish at this station and to bring it to the cafeteria, but people were all offended and I was asked to take it down. Next time someone nukes some stank fishy, I'm gonna hide a half eaten can of tuna under their desk on a Friday night and see what they think on Monday after it has been rotting for an entire weekend.

Also, everybody uses me as their time waster while they wait for their food to be cooked. "Hey I'll talk to Mota!"One word: Sabotage.