Maybe I Want a Toilet

cartman · 08-25-2016, 06:16 PM

I've never owned a toilet, urinal or bidet. I'm not looking for anything fancy per se, just something I can sit on and do my business, or maybe do some reading or thinking. Would like something with dual flush is my only real prerequisite but I do think I'd rather have something with a heated seat, heh. And I'd like to spend no more than in the $100 range. What brands, types, models, should I be looking at?

mckerney · 08-25-2016, 06:24 PM

If you get a toilet you're going to want to get a tablet to so you have something to do while using your toilet.

Suicane75 · 08-25-2016, 06:25 PM

I'll sell ya a shovel for $9.99

tarcone · 08-25-2016, 06:46 PM

American Standard makes a quality toilet

Kohler is a good brand also

Here is a website I found with the top toilets

Unbeatable Guide of 2016: Best Toilet Brands and Reviews

SirFozzie · 08-25-2016, 07:05 PM

Maybe I want a sublet? Maybe I want a eaglet? Maybe I want a baphomet? Trying to come up with more parodies here...

timmae · 08-25-2016, 07:14 PM

Better get 1 GB of ram.

Suicane75 · 08-25-2016, 07:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by timmae

Better get 1 GB of bran.

.

lungs · 08-25-2016, 08:28 PM

Grammaticus · 08-25-2016, 10:04 PM

If you have never owned a toilet, what do you use? An out house?

lungs · 08-25-2016, 10:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grammaticus

If you have never owned a toilet, what do you use? An out house?

Chamber pot

Grammaticus · 08-25-2016, 10:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lungs

Chamber pot

Sweet, that is way better.

CU Tiger · 08-26-2016, 08:59 AM

You want a Toto.
I know this is a parody thread, but this answer isnt.
You want a toto. It will flush a cat.

AnalBumCover · 08-26-2016, 09:22 AM

Thoughts on this Bidet Seat from Costco?

Quote:

Features: Wireless Remote, Heated Seat, Warm Water Wash, Warm Air Dry

Kodos · 08-26-2016, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lungs

Chamber pot

Look, Dad--Bedpans!

stevew · 08-26-2016, 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SirFozzie

Maybe I want a sublet? Maybe I want a eaglet? Maybe I want a baphomet? Trying to come up with more parodies here...

Maybe I want a Trebuchet?

itsmepuja17 · 07-12-2017, 03:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cartman

I've never owned a toilet, urinal or bidet. I'm not looking for anything fancy per se, just something I can sit on and do my business, or maybe do some reading or thinking. Would like something with dual flush is my only real prerequisite but I do think I'd rather have something with a heated seat, heh. And I'd like to spend no more than in the $100 range. What brands, types, models, should I be looking at?

You should check out this compared list of best toilets that shows all budget toilets with all specified details too.

MrBug708 · 07-12-2017, 03:45 AM

Spam is on point and topic today

Suicane75 · 07-12-2017, 08:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnalBumCover

Thoughts on this Bidet Seat from Costco?

The video ad on that page is fucking creepy.

AnalBumCover · 07-12-2017, 09:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Suicane75

The video ad on that page is fucking creepy.

at around 00:15, when it cut from the toilet shot to the woman hunched over splashing her face with water, my gag reflex triggered.

Suicane75 · 07-12-2017, 10:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnalBumCover

at around 00:15, when it cut from the toilet shot to the woman hunched over splashing her face with water, my gag reflex triggered.

I expected the toilet to turn into a robot and start disemboweling the family.

Julio Riddols · 07-12-2017, 01:28 PM

The first bidet centric horror film will be sweet.

Edit: Thought of a title. 'Bye Bye Bidet'

Chief Rum · 07-12-2017, 06:31 PM

This thread==win

Suicane75 · 07-12-2017, 10:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Julio Riddols

The first bidet centric horror film will be sweet.

Edit: Thought of a title. 'Bye Bye Bidet'

When the hero finally destroys the toilet "toodaloo".

AnalBumCover · 07-12-2017, 11:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Suicane75

"toodaloo"

I read this in Arnold Schwarzenegger's voice.

Julio Riddols · 07-13-2017, 12:40 AM

Get to the plummah!!

Chief Rum · 08-04-2017, 01:46 AM

You know, those online Russian to English translators are just getting better and better!

Toddzilla · 08-04-2017, 11:52 AM

I could have sworn this was going to be a parody thread

cartman · 08-04-2017, 11:59 AM

In Soviet FOFC, thread parodies you

bhlloy · 08-04-2017, 12:08 PM

https://xkcd.com/810/

Lathum · 05-08-2019, 07:38 AM

good lord

PilotMan · 05-08-2019, 07:51 AM

That's the second one out of 31 posts! How many toilet based spam bots are out there? And WHY for the love of god, who is programming them? And WHY are they programming them?

frankfartin2077 · 12-02-2019, 02:38 PM

few days ago, i was also looking for a suggestion. I found many suggestions but still i was so confused between brands and all things then i found this website and its very helpful in finding such related things.

15 Best Toilets of 2019

NobodyHere · 12-02-2019, 02:41 PM

Best spambot ever.

molson · 12-02-2019, 02:43 PM

Great to see frankfartin2077 back.

As always, I suggest trying out toilets on the showroom floor before committing to anything .

frankfartin2077 · 12-02-2019, 02:48 PM

Thanks Molson,

But not actually recommended by me only, many of my mates told me about it and so on i found it helpful. Also i never come to any result before testing it myself.

By the way, thanks again!

GrantDawg · 12-02-2019, 02:50 PM

Frankinfartin, it's all over
Your mission is a failure
Your lifestyles to extreme....

albionmoonlight · 12-02-2019, 02:54 PM

The 2008 recession began when everyone noticed all at once that the entire economy was built on high-risk mortgage debt.

The 2020 recession will begin when everyone realizes all at once that the entire economy is toilet-based spambots.

QuikSand · 12-02-2019, 03:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CU Tiger

You want a toto. It will flush a cat.

underrated response

JonInMiddleGA · 12-02-2019, 03:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GrantDawg

Frankinfartin, it's all over
Your mission is a failure
Your lifestyles to extreme....

{hat tip}

Silver Owl · 12-02-2019, 05:57 PM

True story, we were looking for a new toilet this summer and bought one based on the box showing it flushing golf balls.

08-25-2016, 06:46 PM	#4
tarcone Coordinator Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Pacific	American Standard makes a quality toilet Kohler is a good brand also Here is a website I found with the top toilets Unbeatable Guide of 2016: Best Toilet Brands and Reviews __________________ Excuses are for wusses- Spencer Lee Punting is Winning- Tory Taylor The word is Fight! Fight! Fight! For Iowa FOFC 30 Dollar Challenge Champion-OOTP '15

08-25-2016, 07:05 PM	#5
SirFozzie Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: The State of Insanity	Maybe I want a sublet? Maybe I want a eaglet? Maybe I want a baphomet? Trying to come up with more parodies here... __________________ Check out Foz's New Video Game Site, An 8-bit Mind in an 8GB world! http://an8bitmind.com

08-25-2016, 07:14 PM	#6
timmae College Starter Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Chicago	Better get 1 GB of ram. __________________ Interactive OOTP 15 Dynasty (Single Season) CHAMPION!! Oh yeah... Happy New York Day everyone!

07-12-2017, 01:28 PM	#21
Julio Riddols College Prospect Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Bryson Shitty, NC	The first bidet centric horror film will be sweet. Edit: Thought of a title. 'Bye Bye Bidet' __________________ Recklessly enthused, stubbornly amused. FUCK EA Last edited by Julio Riddols : 07-12-2017 at 02:14 PM.

07-12-2017, 06:31 PM	#22
Chief Rum Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Where Hip Hop lives	This thread==win __________________ . . I would rather be wrong...Than live in the shadows of your song...My mind is open wide...And now I'm ready to start...You're not sure...You open the door...And step out into the dark...Now I'm ready.

08-25-2016, 06:24 PM	#2
mckerney Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000	If you get a toilet you're going to want to get a tablet to so you have something to do while using your toilet.

08-25-2016, 06:25 PM	#3
Suicane75 Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: NJ	I'll sell ya a shovel for $9.99

08-25-2016, 08:28 PM	#8
lungs Pro Rookie Join Date: May 2002 Location: Prairie du Sac, WI

08-25-2016, 10:04 PM	#9
Grammaticus Pro Rookie Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Tennessee	If you have never owned a toilet, what do you use? An out house?

08-26-2016, 08:59 AM	#12
CU Tiger Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Backwoods, SC	You want a Toto. I know this is a parody thread, but this answer isnt. You want a toto. It will flush a cat.

07-12-2017, 03:45 AM	#17
MrBug708 Head Coach Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Whittier	Spam is on point and topic today

07-13-2017, 12:40 AM	#25
Julio Riddols College Prospect Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Bryson Shitty, NC	Get to the plummah!! __________________ Recklessly enthused, stubbornly amused. FUCK EA Last edited by Julio Riddols : 07-13-2017 at 12:40 AM.

08-04-2017, 01:46 AM	#26
Chief Rum Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Where Hip Hop lives	You know, those online Russian to English translators are just getting better and better! __________________ . . I would rather be wrong...Than live in the shadows of your song...My mind is open wide...And now I'm ready to start...You're not sure...You open the door...And step out into the dark...Now I'm ready.

08-04-2017, 11:52 AM	#27
Toddzilla Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Burke, VA	I could have sworn this was going to be a parody thread

08-04-2017, 11:59 AM	#28
cartman Death Herald Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Le stelle la notte sono grandi e luminose nel cuore profondo del Texas	In Soviet FOFC, thread parodies you __________________ Thinkin' of a master plan 'Cuz ain't nuthin' but sweat inside my hand So I dig into my pocket, all my money is spent So I dig deeper but still comin' up with lint

08-04-2017, 12:08 PM	#29
bhlloy Coordinator Join Date: Nov 2003	https://xkcd.com/810/

05-08-2019, 07:38 AM	#30
Lathum Favored Bitch #1 Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: homeless in NJ	good lord

05-08-2019, 07:51 AM	#31
PilotMan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Seven miles up	That's the second one out of 31 posts! How many toilet based spam bots are out there? And WHY for the love of god, who is programming them? And WHY are they programming them? __________________ He's just like if Snow White was competitive, horny, and capable of beating the shit out of anyone that called her Pops. Like Steam? Join the FOFC Steam group here: http://steamcommunity.com/groups/FOFConSteam

12-02-2019, 02:38 PM	#32
frankfartin2077 n00b Join Date: Dec 2019	few days ago, i was also looking for a suggestion. I found many suggestions but still i was so confused between brands and all things then i found this website and its very helpful in finding such related things. 15 Best Toilets of 2019

12-02-2019, 02:41 PM	#33
NobodyHere Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2013	Best spambot ever. __________________ "I am God's prophet, and I need an attorney"

12-02-2019, 02:43 PM	#34
molson General Manager Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: The Mountains	Great to see frankfartin2077 back. As always, I suggest trying out toilets on the showroom floor before committing to anything .

12-02-2019, 02:48 PM	#35
frankfartin2077 n00b Join Date: Dec 2019	Agree with you Thanks Molson, But not actually recommended by me only, many of my mates told me about it and so on i found it helpful. Also i never come to any result before testing it myself. By the way, thanks again!

12-02-2019, 02:50 PM	#36
GrantDawg World Champion Mis-speller Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Covington, Ga.	Frankinfartin, it's all over Your mission is a failure Your lifestyles to extreme....

12-02-2019, 02:54 PM	#37
albionmoonlight Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: North Carolina	The 2008 recession began when everyone noticed all at once that the entire economy was built on high-risk mortgage debt. The 2020 recession will begin when everyone realizes all at once that the entire economy is toilet-based spambots.

12-02-2019, 05:57 PM	#40
Silver Owl High School JV Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Akron, OH	True story, we were looking for a new toilet this summer and bought one based on the box showing it flushing golf balls.

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)