Rate The Last Movie You Watched

[Matthean]

New X-Men movie was great and maybe the best X-Men yet. One thing that kind of rubbed me wrong is the lack of the "First Class." It just felt like a minimum of key characters versus an actual first group of X-Men students.

[Groundhog]

X-Men: Days of Future Past - 8/10
I was a bit letdown to be honest, but I think that was a combination of over-hype as well as the strength of Captain America 2. It was probably the best X-Men movie but I agree it wasn't really an "X-Men" movie. Seems to me it was a setup for the next generation of X-Men, and a chance to recast Cyclops/Jean etc. by setting the next film in the 80s with a newly recruited X-Men team.

[korme]

Charlie Countryman (2013) - 5/10

The frame of this story has been seen many times before, with this being the low budget set in Bucharest, Romania version. The direction lost me a few times, jumping all over the place. The only saving grace was Shia LaBeouf, who seems to put in a fascinating performance no matter how shitty the movie is. His off-camera personality notwishstanding, he is uniquely talented on the screen.

[NobodyHere]

So they're actually making this....

[HarryLime]

The Raid Redemption & The Raid 2

Indonesian made martial arts movies, and will have subtitles so need to watch when not distracted unless you speak the dialect of course..

In Raid Redemption a SWAT team goes into take down a gang king pin in his residential tower where he runs his operation, and all hell breaks lose.. the action is fast and well choreographed.

The Raid 2 picks up right where the Raid left off, and sees out hero go undercover to infiltrate the local gangs.. the action in this is superb, have not enjoyed an action/martial arts move as much in a long time.. movie does go on a bit long at 2.5 hours, but time seemed to fly..

If you like action/martial arts flicks, Hollywood hasn't made anything close to these in years.. i give em a solid 8.5 out of 10.

[Julio Riddols]

That Dumb and Dumber To actually looks like it is a shit ton funnier than the crap ass prequel they made without Carrey and Daniels. Those two have good chemistry and it looks like they haven't missed a beat as Harry and Lloyd. I think I probably want to see it.

[chinaski]

Originally Posted by HarryLime

The Raid Redemption & The Raid 2

Indonesian made martial arts movies, and will have subtitles so need to watch when not distracted unless you speak the dialect of course..

In Raid Redemption a SWAT team goes into take down a gang king pin in his residential tower where he runs his operation, and all hell breaks lose.. the action is fast and well choreographed.

The Raid 2 picks up right where the Raid left off, and sees out hero go undercover to infiltrate the local gangs.. the action in this is superb, have not enjoyed an action/martial arts move as much in a long time.. movie does go on a bit long at 2.5 hours, but time seemed to fly..

If you like action/martial arts flicks, Hollywood hasn't made anything close to these in years.. i give em a solid 8.5 out of 10.

+100000 for both of these. I think Raid Redemption is the best martial arts/action movie ever made. Raid 2 is a little ways behind, imo, but still incredible.

[chinaski]

Under the Skin - Literally 60 minutes of a fully nude Scarlett Johansson being slowly walked after by dudes with boners. 10/10.

But seriously, you're either going to love, hate or be completely confused by this one. Very Kubrick-ish. I loved it.

[nol]

Shoot, I made a post about Blue Jasmine a while ago but I didn't make sure to see that it actually posted. Anyways, the gist of it was that I had seen it not too long after watching Wolf of Wall Street, and when comparing the two movies it seemed especially absurd how there was a lot of backlash against WOWS to the tune of "but it seems like Scorsese is condoning the type of lifestyle led by Jordan Belfort."

Just from watching WOWS, that was an incredibly stupid sentiment. I felt like it was even on the side of being overly heavy-handed, as in there was specific dialogue in which DiCaprio and Jonah Hill were saying almost verbatim, "LOL we aren't actually adding any value to the economy, we're just ripping off stupid people and getting rich!"

Blue Jasmine was just the opposite (non-spoiler alert: the protagonists of both films got rich during the pre-financial crisis times before stumbling back down to earth) to me with its more personal interactions between the .1 percenters and more believable, down-to-earth characters.

[chinaski]

Bad words. 1/10. Tired attempt of another Bad News Bears, Bad Santa type. Maybe a couple laughs tops, and a shitty uninspired story. So bland. Major waste of Bateman and Gasteyer.

[Pyser]

Originally Posted by chinaski

Bad words. 1/10. Tired attempt of another Bad News Bears, Bad Santa type. Maybe a couple laughs tops, and a shitty uninspired story. So bland. Major waste of Bateman and Gasteyer.

Didnt bateman direct it? guess he wasted himself. possibly twice.

[chinaski]

They Came Together - 6.5/10. This movie is DUMB, it tries to be dumb, it wants you to know its dumb every second. Some parts are head shaking groaners and quite a few parts are totally hilarious. Im still giggling at a couple of them. Great cast, and tons of cameos. If you dont like Rudd or Poehler and their 'quirky cuteness' then you will for sure hate it, I 6.5 out of 10 totally loved it.

[Julio Riddols]

Originally Posted by chinaski

Bad words. 1/10. Tired attempt of another Bad News Bears, Bad Santa type. Maybe a couple laughs tops, and a shitty uninspired story. So bland. Major waste of Bateman and Gasteyer.

I agree. I was expecting a typical Bateman "Everyman gets shit on but finds a way to make it work" type film, kind of like Extract.. But it was really a far fetched and kind of pointless and unfunny film in the end. I thought the character could have been better if he wasn't pigeonholed into wanting solely to do that one thing he wanted to do.

[Julio Riddols]

Originally Posted by chinaski

Under the Skin - Literally 60 minutes of a fully nude Scarlett Johansson being slowly walked after by dudes with boners. 10/10.

But seriously, you're either going to love, hate or be completely confused by this one. Very Kubrick-ish. I loved it.

REALLY excited to see this one. Apparently many of the scenes were shot with regular people who had no idea they were in a car with Scarlett. Interesting approach to say the least. Between it and Interstellar I am at least excited for 2 films hitting theaters this summer.

[Honolulu_Blue]

Snowpiercer. 9/10

This movie was given very limited release, but it's going to be released widely on "Video On Demand" on Friday. It's really worth going to see or renting it.

It's one of the few original sci-fi movies to come around in a while and it's wonderfully executed. The basic plot, as crazy as it sounds, is that in an effort to stop global warming, humanity essentially freezes the planet, killing all life on it. The only remaining humans on the planet are on this train that has been circling the globe for the last 18 years. There is a huge disparity between the "haves" and "have nots" and... there you go.

It's got a solid cast: Chris Evans, Tilda Swinton, John Hurt, Ed Harris. It's very unique, has some amazing visuals and a bit of a Terry Gilliam odd dystopian view of the world.

Very enjoyable.

[thesloppy]

I enjoyed Snowpiercer lots too. It's getting a small, staged, indie-style release here in the states, but I think it's already been out for like a year in Korea. Be a shoe!

[chadritt]

I wanted to love that movie so much. All I could think by the end was "huh....I really want this director to make BioShock now."

[Julio Riddols]

Under The Skin: 9.5/10 - I loved it. 100% loved it. The score, the atmosphere, the nudity, the effects. The only reason I dock it half a point is because it was a little nebulous. I dig that though, the more nebulous the better for films like this.

[Buccaneer]

Gravity - 7/10Nice looking movie that became humorous with all of the things that could and did go wrong.

42 - 6/10Disappointing movie in that it felt like a standard TV movie. It felt flat with nothing more than a series of snippets. The two leads were the only ones with any dimensions to them. Such an important event could've played more in depth for a 2 hour movie. I think Ken Burn's Baseball did Jackie's story much better.

[terpkristin]

The Challenger Disaster - A great movie made for TV by the BBC, it tells the story of renowned scientist Dr. Richard Feynman's involvement on the Rogers Commission, the board convened to determine the cause of the 1986 Challenger shuttle explosion.

Feynman's ability to convey difficult concepts to "mere mortals" is well known and is in fact brought up many times during engineering courses on communications of findings. The Challenger incident in particular comes up as an example of how not to put together a technical package/recommendation (if you look at what the lower-level Thiokol engineers presented to the management, it becomes clearer why some of the decisions were made), but also of how to do it (i.e. Feynman's simple demonstration of putting the o-rings into a glass of ice water to show how they become less flexible).

Really well done with some top-notch actors. I think it was a few bucks on Amazon VOD streaming and was well worth-it.

/tk

[Matthean]

My Physics/Calc teacher in HS was a HUGE Dr. Richard Feynman fan. He read is books and talked about the Challenger incident.

[BYU 14]

Tammy - 4/10

As good as Melissa McCarthy was in Bridesmaids, The Heat and to a much lesser extent Identity Thief, the insecure sweet girl trapped in an obnoxious smartass shell routine just wears a bit thin in Tammy. There were a few chuckles here and there, but the film never really finds a groove and the story just seems to meander. I laughed my ass off at the Heat, mainly due to the chemistry between McCarthy and Bullock, which just doesn't exist in this film between her and Sarandon. Recommend waiting for this on Netflix, fi you watch it at all.

[Suicane75]

While Snowpiercer was a little hit and miss to me form a storytelling perspective, Tilda Swinton was fabulous. I love her so much.

I watched Life Itself last night and if you ever enjoyed Roger Eberts work, even just a little bit, you should go out of your way to see it. All at once inspiring and completely heartbreaking.

[molson]

They Came Together 7.5/10

I think it's a smallish niche of people that really connect with the David Wain/The State/Wet Hot American Summer/Stella/Ect. family of comedies, but if you're one of them, this is a great addition to that group. Silly, ridiculous, great cast, you know exactly what you're getting and it delivers that and nothing more.

[rowech]

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (8/10) -- not quite as much action as I thought going in but the portrayal of the apes is nothing short of spectacular. The CGI is done so well that you forget what you're seeing. The movements, sounds, etc. add so much. The story is very straight forward but it works very well. The human actors are kinda blah but to be honest, that's not why most will go.

[korme]

Originally Posted by Suicane75

While Snowpiercer was a little hit and miss to me form a storytelling perspective, Tilda Swinton was fabulous. I love her so much.

I watched Life Itself last night and if you ever enjoyed Roger Eberts work, even just a little bit, you should go out of your way to see it. All at once inspiring and completely heartbreaking.

Where were you able to watch Life Itself?

PS I miss your 100 star reviews of horrible B movies.

[revrew]

Originally Posted by rowech

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (8/10) -- not quite as much action as I thought going in but the portrayal of the apes is nothing short of spectacular. The CGI is done so well that you forget what you're seeing. The movements, sounds, etc. add so much. The story is very straight forward but it works very well. The human actors are kinda blah but to be honest, that's not why most will go.

Ditto. I might have scored it a 7.5, but every comment is spot on. Had they developed the human characters as much as the apes, this could have been a 10, a classic. As it is, just a very good film. Caesar is amazing. Just amazing.

[Suicane75]

Originally Posted by korme

Where were you able to watch Life Itself?

It's floating around, shall we say.

Originally Posted by korme

PS I miss your 100 star reviews of horrible B movies.

You're in luck cause I plan on taking a weekend or two to try and get through the 30 or 40 movies I have backlogged, including the Thankskilling series.

[Julio Riddols]

Originally Posted by molson

They Came Together 7.5/10

I think it's a smallish niche of people that really connect with the David Wain/The State/Wet Hot American Summer/Stella/Ect. family of comedies, but if you're one of them, this is a great addition to that group. Silly, ridiculous, great cast, you know exactly what you're getting and it delivers that and nothing more.

I would give this about the same rating. Not quite as well done as Wet Hot American Summer, but still funny in a similar way. I loved people saying obvious stuff about what holiday it was or what was happening in certain scenes, and I really liked the Michael Shannon cameo at the end.

[Suicane75]

Hanger: 15 Out Of 100 Stars
From the same guy who made the infinitely superior Gutterballs and the equally awful Live Feed, comes Hanger. Because wasn't the world clamoring for the story of a hookers botched abortion and the resulting murderous spawn.

Unfortunately, Hanger has all the same stupidity of Gutterballs and absolutely none of the charm or fun. The story is silly beyond belief, but that doesn't stop the script from explaining every corny detail in long, drawn out scenes of eye rolling dialog.

As the movie opens we've got a bunch of hookers, one of whom is pregnant, living in a run down hotel. Their pimp doesn't like the fact that the pregnant girl is costing him money so he decides to take care of things himself. In true Brian Nicholoson fashion this is shown in very gory detail. The problem is that it's not in any way funny, nor is it making a statement. I could deal with a scene like this if there was something behind it that made it worth while, or even made it seem like the director was trying to say something worthwhile, but he's not, he just wants to show that he can do a special effects abortion.

Now then, the hooker dies and the baby gets thrown in the trash, only to be picked up a homeless mental. Fast forward 18 years and the mental homeless dude has raised the disfigured baby, apparently living in a tent in an ally all this time. Upon his 18th birthday the old guy passes the kid off to a former john of the hooker who believes he's the kids father. The father does a lot of talking about the situation, as if we're in the middle of a grand mystery and can't figure out this less than basic story on our own.

The dad apparently has connections at a recycling plant and gets the kid a job working with other mentals, misfits and what not. But his grander scheme is to use the kid to get to and kill the pimp, because every pimp who works out of a $5 motel in what looks like Fort Lee, NJ takes a master plan, spanning 18 years, to kill. Now, we saw the dad earlier in the film, and not only has he not appeared to age in 18 years, but he still drives the same truck. God, this is so awful. Not only is it awful, but it's fucking boring. There are some gory and silly kills, but not silly fun, just silly stupid.

The kid is put up with one of the other dudes who works at the plant, who of course is also a goofy, disfigured sort who just happens to have a porno featuring the kids dead mom. He also thinks hot dogs are what you get when you microwave poodles. Real funny shit here.

So the dad explains the master plan to the kid, how the best way to get to the pimp is to draw him out by killing his whores. Again, this is akin to sending Seal Team 6 in to rob a candy bar from a Bodega. Anyway, as soon as the dad explains his plan, he gets in his truck and wouldn't you know it, one of the pimps main hookers jumps in and starts talking about how she wants to help kill the pimp because, and I quote "He fucks every single one of those whores". It's like my dad always said, if you can't trust your pimp to be monogamous, who the hell can you trust? The scene doesn't really go anywhere other than to give us a good five minutes of the kind of top shelf acting you can only find in movies about botched abortions and the killer children of said botched abortions.

Next we go into the comedy portion of the movie as the freaks are working at the recycling plant, which appears to consist of one room full of dumpsters with various things in them. The budget for this movie is listed at $250,000, $200 of which I'm sure went into building this set. This scene is full of non sequitur jokes involved crabs, making tea out of used tampons, and a diaper fight, of course using loaded diapers. This might have actually been funny if this was what the entire movie was about, but as it is it just feels like the scene itself is one long non sequitur. It's interspersed with two other scenes, one featuring the dad and the pimp having a showdown that involves a hooker fingering what she admits is her unwashed vagina and rubbing the remnants all over dads face, and the other a scene involving the improbably hot boss of the recycling plant deciding to get on her desk and masturbate for no particular reason. Both scenes make liberal use of a squishing sound effect. Well, if you've got to have a calling card as a director, I guess the sounds of vagina squish is as good as any.

Ok, now things get rather fascinating, on some disturbing level. The dad is tied up after having his face torched by the pimp. Then the hooker with the dirty cooch proceeds to rubs herself all over his torched up face and fart on him. At the same time, one of the mentals from the recycling plant drugs the other two guys, takes an entire bottle of viagra and rapes them. But this is no simple rape, oh no. After doing the first guy, who decides to rape an open wound in the stomach of the partially aborted kid. This is...graphic. This is...I'm at a loss for words as to the point of this, the comedic intentions of this, the entire point of any of this. But I'd be lying if I didn't admit to laughing my ass off just now. Oh, and all of this is interspersed with the hot boss still doing a rather graphic softcore masturbation scene with a pen, that her father the foreman will later sniff.

From there it's more over the top shit, including a tampon being removed from the passed out boss and revenge for the rape by choking the rapist with poop. There's also some outstanding continuity as the dad, torched and beaten, wrapped in plastic and left for dead, wakes up and cuts his way out, then finds the hooker who farted all over him, still in the process of douching, which she said she was going to do as she left the room he was being tortured in. Then there's Russell, the dude Hanger lives with, an hour into the film saying "you can crash with me tonight", long after it's been established that they live together. The pimp telling the female boss "maybe I'll come back later and bang you again", despite the fact that he hasn't banged her once. Or the pimp throwing in a line at the end of the film about having just served 18 years in jail, which leaves the viewer to wonder exactly when in the past day he's collected all these hookers to work for him. I'd like to be amazed at a movie that cares this little about it's own story, but it's too god damn ridiculous to even start to think it ever cares about the story to begin with. So yeah.

Ok, so what else? Well the movie is filled with sound effects. Like, there's constant train whistles and sounds of trucks and police cars, to give the illusion that everything is taking place somewhere other than an abandoned parking lot. It's incredibly distracting, but not nearly as distracting the music that plays during much of the dialog. It's like how in real movies, fight scenes are often augmented by a blistering soundtrack to heighten the scene. Well here the wondrous banter between characters is backed up by indiscernible and generic heavy rock. Unfortunately we can still hear the words.

This is a movie that you cross your fingers and pray it was meant to be this dumb, because otherwise the world just feels like a sadder place to live. The thing is, I've seen this guy make a good movie. Granted, the actors were roughly 1000 times better, and there was an actual set, but still. Everything about it was so insanely better than this piece of shit.

I'd suggest that this DVD is better served used as a coaster, but that belittles the work that goes into making coasters. In a movie filled with rape, abortions, open wounds, pooping, and tampon tea, the most offensive thing about it is the craftsmanship.

[Groundhog]

Snowpiercer - 9/10
If not for this thread I doubt I'd have ever seen this. Loved it. A bit slow to start, but once the journey forward begins it was great.

Rise of the Planets of the Ape - 8/10
Really liked this one too. I liked that the two sides were pretty grey - ie. it wasn't the baddie humans or baddie apes - and that everyone had their motivations... very well scripted. And yeah, CGI was amazing, maybe the best I've ever seen. I thought the first film looked great, but this was another step up.

[Karlifornia]

Boyhood- 9/10

Linklater speaks to me. I'm still not sure whether or not to willfully disregard the unique way this movie was filmed, or laud it for it. I will say that this movie is a beautiful, relaxed journey, in which anyone can find something to relate to. It doesn't rely on cheap plot contrivances much (possibly not at all, but a couple drunken stepfather scenes may qualify as cloying), but rather keeps everything closely grounded in reality. It takes the mundane events of growing up, and makes us long to experience it all again for the first time.

[HarryLime]

Sabotage 2/10

It gets 2 because i fell asleep for about 20% of the movie and I cant judge those parts fairly as i did not see them.. The 80% i did see was total crap and did not deserve a score. Boring and predictable, and what little action there is fails to get out of neutral, yet alone into 2nd gear.

Arnie needs a new thing. He just doesnt cut it in action any more... Maybe Twins 2... Or kindergarten cop 2.....

[sterlingice]

Originally Posted by korme

PS I miss your 100 star reviews of horrible B movies.

And now they're awesomely back

SI

[flere-imsaho]

Snowpiercer - 9/10

Classic science fiction in the vein of Blade Runner and Dark City. In fact, if you like either of those films, you should really see this one. It's not perfect. For one, some of the messaging is ham-fisted (there's literally a line about "owning the means of production", or close to it). For two, only maybe two characters get the room to develop beyond a caricature. But these are minor things. Chris Evans turns in a fine acting performance and each of the other actors do very well with the time their given, with special shout-outs to Tilda Swinton and Octavia Spencer.

Monuments Men - 6/10

I don't get the hate this movie got. Perhaps people figured that with the cast, the setting (WWII) and with Damon trying to impress with directing, they'd get something like Saving Private Ryan. And it's not that.

But what it is, is a good untold story about WWII, that is told well and adds to the historical record for WWII which, IMO, is always a good thing. We should never forget the true ruthlessness of Hitler/the Nazis, and this adds to that history.

It's an entertaining movie, if a bit methodical at times. Cate Blanchett could probably be given more to do, and Clooney is operating on auto. But you won't waste your time with this movie, and I'm glad it was made.

It also reminded me that you can now access much of HBO's catalog for free via Amazon Prime, and that includes Band of Brothers which is, IMO, among the greatest TV ever made.

[molson]

Originally Posted by flere-imsaho

Monuments Men - 6/10

I don't get the hate this movie got. Perhaps people figured that with the cast, the setting (WWII) and with Damon trying to impress with directing, they'd get something like Saving Private Ryan. And it's not that.

But what it is, is a good untold story about WWII, that is told well and adds to the historical record for WWII which, IMO, is always a good thing. We should never forget the true ruthlessness of Hitler/the Nazis, and this adds to that history.

It's an entertaining movie, if a bit methodical at times. Cate Blanchett could probably be given more to do, and Clooney is operating on auto. But you won't waste your time with this movie, and I'm glad it was made.

It also reminded me that you can now access much of HBO's catalog for free via Amazon Prime, and that includes Band of Brothers which is, IMO, among the greatest TV ever made.

There's this tune that runs through that entire movie. Like after ever plot point, when they're going to next thing, there it is. And then there was a slower version of it after something serious happened. I guess most movies have that, but I don't think to that extent. Because this one, it's still in my head. And not because it was delightfully catchy.

I don't think the movie was good but it was a pleasant enough way to spend 2 hours or whatever.

[sterlingice]

Also, Suicane75, I don't think I can say "you're doing the lord's work" but it's good that you are watching these movies and sparing the rest of society from having to do it.

SI

[Suicane75]

Thing is, I actually had high hopes for that movie. But it literally takes a good 45 minutes before ANYTHING happens. Which is inexcusable for a movie that's not about anything to begin with.

[sterlingice]

I almost want a coffee table book with a giant full color movie poster or DVD cover on one side of the page and the review on the other with some images mixed in. I'd totally buy it for the standard coffee table price of "found in the $5 clearance bin at Barnes & Noble with a $49.99 MSRP on the back"

SI

[Qwikshot]

I allowed my 13 year old daughter to watch Kill Bill with me and I've never seen her so amazed, she made me put on volume 2 right after finishing the first one.

[NoSkillz]

The Counselor - 2/10

A stacked cast (Javier Bardem, Michael Fassbender, Brad Pitt, Penelope Cruz, Cameron Diaz) and an esteemed director in Ridley Scott would surely be a recipe for success but this movie was a hot, steaming pile of crap.

Ridiculous dialogue, a pointless plot and unbelievably leaden performances from Fassbender and Diaz especially just sink this ship upon departure.

Huge waste of time, although I give it a bonus point (would have been one out of ten) for one of the most gory death scenes I've seen on film.

This movie sucks.

[Suicane75]

Famine: 30 Out Of 100 Stars
Another Ryan Nicholson movie, and easily the most perplexing of his 4 movies I've seen so far. I remarked in my review of Hanger that I had no idea what the film was trying to accomplish, well Famine raises my sheer perplexedness up to about 1000.

Set in Sloppy Secondary High, Famine runs the gamut from amusing, bizarre, nonsensical, sexy, non nonsensical, funny, nonsensical, and nonsensical. On the plus side, there's no unnecessary build to the imbecility. Within 30 seconds you know pretty much what you're in for as you're greeted with hot chicks, nice boobs, atrocious acting and dreadful writing.

I think, and this is purely a guess, but I think that there's an attempt at satire here. The first half of the movie is decently funny either way, just based on sheer befuddlement. The lead actress, whatever the hell her motivation is, seems like she's doing a good job of pulling it off, the problem is that I have no idea what it is. She also has exquisite boobies, which never hurts. To be fair, almost all of the women in the cast are good, I just have no idea what it is they're doing. I suppose the men might be good too, if they're impetus is to be the human version of Beavis, and for all I can tell it might be.

The story is about a group of kids who were involved in hurting a teacher 5 years ago during the schools famine, which is a 24 hour hunger strike to raise awareness and earn extra credits. Don't look at me that way, that's the story. So after 5 years of no famine, the school decides to have another one and yadda yadda yadda, horror movie tropes, etc.

There's the usual Ryan Nicholson schtick at play here, although it's turned down a bit in favor of just letting a dumb script be the joke. The problem is that in much the same way one fart is funny, but 100 farts is just a big smelly mess, the movie never evolves. What's humorous in the first few minutes becomes zestless by the halfway point, and then to make matters worse the last 40 minutes devolve into the same boring, run of the mill, rather soulless, chase and slash cliche that they've spent the first 40 minutes mocking.

The kills are more standard than in any of Nicholsons previous films, though his penchant for facial scarring remains. And the over the top gross out moments are kept to a minimum, nary a vaginal close up to be found. The girls are hot, but there's never the level of nudity I was hoping for if I'm being honest. There are the odd odd scenes, such as uncontrolled semen splatter and a man trying to have sex with a swiss roll and some of the comedy in the early part of the film works pretty well. The editing and direction are competent for the most part, but there are moments where it gets really bad.

The most mainstream of Nicholsons work so far, there are glimpses of fun and glimmers of hope in Famine, but for whatever reason, even when he stumbles upon stuff that works, he can't stay focused and the entire thing just turns into a discombobulated and rather boring mess.

[Kodos]

Begin Again is a movie with a lot of similarities to Once, which I guess makes sense because both were directed by John Carney. Chances are, if you liked Once, you'll probably like Begin Again too. I'd give it an 8.

[Vince, Pt. II]

Edge of Tomorrow - 9/10
I'm a sucker for a good action movie, and even more a sucker for new intellectual property in the science fiction genre. This is a great sci-fi action movie. All time great? No, but definitely a movie I really enjoyed and one I would think about seeing again in the theater.

Cruise does what Cruise does best...it seems like he doesn't age with regard to these kinds of movies. He does a fantastic job here going from scared, completely out of his element to gritty action hero. He also adds a bit of humor and tones down the intensity, so he looks and feels more natural in the role. Blunt is also good, but Cruise carries it in my opinion.

The plot is pretty well done, and while it seems like it would lend itself to endless repetition (literally), they do a great job of using the vehicle enough to take advantage of it without pushing too much of it in your face.

I was a little miffed at the end... (not very spoilery spoiler)

Spoiler

I thought they had a chance to make something fantastic and they instead Hollywood-ized it a little

...but it really didn't detract much from an otherwise fun jaunt. It was a little long (just about two hours), but it didn't drag at all, and the pacing was good.

Two thumbs up, would recommend.

[gstelmack]

The Reunion - 8/10

Leave it to the WWE to bring back the 80s action flick genre. Just a good ol' fun action movie, minus the blood and sex that has become so prevalent lately (okay, many 80s action flicks had the one obligatory sex scene). I think I could let my kids watch this one, and maybe minus a line or two could go straight to TV. I enjoyed the story, and the action was reasonable, no over-the-top CGI (I enjoy it as much as the next guy, but it was fun without it). Just a pleasant change of pace.

I love coming across surprises like this on Netflix that turn out to be better than I expected. Man of Tai Chi was similar, and Cybergeddon wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been (although the hacker she breaks out of jail makes the movie, without him it probably is almost as bad as it could have been).

[Kodos]

Originally Posted by Vince, Pt. II

Edge of Tomorrow - 9/10
I'm a sucker for a good action movie, and even more a sucker for new intellectual property in the science fiction genre. This is a great sci-fi action movie. All time great? No, but definitely a movie I really enjoyed and one I would think about seeing again in the theater.

Cruise does what Cruise does best...it seems like he doesn't age with regard to these kinds of movies. He does a fantastic job here going from scared, completely out of his element to gritty action hero. He also adds a bit of humor and tones down the intensity, so he looks and feels more natural in the role. Blunt is also good, but Cruise carries it in my opinion.

The plot is pretty well done, and while it seems like it would lend itself to endless repetition (literally), they do a great job of using the vehicle enough to take advantage of it without pushing too much of it in your face.

I was a little miffed at the end... (not very spoilery spoiler)

Spoiler

I thought they had a chance to make something fantastic and they instead Hollywood-ized it a little

...but it really didn't detract much from an otherwise fun jaunt. It was a little long (just about two hours), but it didn't drag at all, and the pacing was good.

Two thumbs up, would recommend.

Agreed. This movie was very enjoyable.

[Suicane75]

The Worlds End: 72 Out Of 100 Stars
Like Shaun Of The Dead and Hot Fuzz before, Simon Peggs The Worlds End is a fun romp with some serious undertones that makes solid use of physical comedy and word play. If you liked those movies I suspect you'll like this one, and you should like them, because they're all good.

20 years after a group of graduates fell short of their pub crawl, the leader is trying to get the gang back to together to finish the job. The problem is, he's the only one still living in the past. Of course he convinces them to join him, and what ensues is a damn fun romp that switches gears very quickly and sends the movie someplace I had no idea it was going. The twist allows for a series of fun ass action sequences that harken back to a bygone era of physical comedy, which it seems the villains are designed specifically to create, and that's cool with me.

Mix a buddy comedy with cyborgs and throw in some stooges, I'm good with that. The Worlds End is our gain.


Bleading Lady: 5 Out Of 100 Stars
Two points for each time a hot chick gets naked, and three points for the approximate number of times I laughed. Even that feels generous.

If you made a how to video on how not to make a movie, it would probably look something like this. I simply don't have the energy to explain the story or go over every little thing in detail. A fair amount of dialog is drowned out by music playing or the sound of a van running. The acting is more horrific than the kills. The script and directing are atrocious and it just fucking goes on and on and on and on. I never thought I'd be so drained from a movies sheer dullness to be completely unflustered by watching a penis get cut off, but here we are.

Ryan Nicholson is apparently an accomplished effects guy, but for the love of all that is holy, somebody close to him needs to sit him down and in the nicest way possible explain that none of the qualities needed to make an interesting movie are present in his DNA.

Someday I'm going to sit down and rewatch Gutterballs to try and see if maybe I was just super duper stoned when I watched it. There really can't be any other explanation.


Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes: 77 Out Of 100 Stars
Where the original dealt with things on a more one on one basis and was led by the strong performances of Franco & Serkis, Dawn has a much wider, but just as fascinating scope.

Serkis is maybe even better this time in having to deal with the angst of both human encroachment and the impending turncoat Koba. The humans don't bring nearly as much to the table this time around although the script tries really hard to give Jason Clarke and Kerri Russell some meat, they just don't resonate the way Franco did in the original. Gary Oldman gives a strong but small performance as the leader of the humans, completely perplexed by the idea of doing anything but taking out the apes. But the heart of the story is Caesar and his conflicted views on humans and the coming war, and Serkis handles the role with an Oscar caliber performance.

No two ways about it, this monkey shines.


Lovelace: 57 Out Of 100 Stars
Lovelace is a tale of two movies, almost literally. After the first 45 minutes play out we're then taken back to the beginning and taken through the same period of time but from a different perspective. It's an interesting ploy that got my attention and then kept it with a decent second act thanks to the performances, though the script never feels like it gets much below the surface even though the ending tries to get really heavy.

The performances by Seyfried as the titular character and Sarsgaard as her husband Chuck Traynor, are good enough, although I was underwhelmed by the portrayal of the typical bad guy husband. Nice and charming at first, then mean, controlling and violent. Even if that's exactly how he really was, it never feels like the movie puts much effort at all into portraying the character the same as it's been portrayed in a million other films. Then at the end it mentions that Traynor would go on to marry Marilyn Chambers, which makes me question much of what I just saw as far as him becoming an out of control pariah in the porn world. Something just isn't adding up. I felt left with more questions than answers.

The supporting cast is pretty strong and although it's not really sexy per se, there is a decent amount of skin, although I was baffled by how much Seyfrieds look was dulled down, but whatevs.

Nothing special, but good enough to keep my attention. Lovelace plays more like an after school special, if after school specials played in porno theaters. Something about that sounds really wrong.

Lovelace? Eh, Likelace.


13 Eerie: 63 Out Of 100 Stars
Canadian horror film that has a decently fresh premise and despite it's many flaws, turns out to be pretty enjoyable, even if a lot of that enjoyment comes directly because of the flaws. You know it's a Canadian movie when two of the first five credits go to guys named Brendan.

A group of young forensic science students are on a training course on a remote island that used to house a prison. Rumor has it that a lot of the death row inmates were subjected to insane experiments and devious torture. I think you can see where this is going.

So the 6 students, A professor who does everything by the book and will brook no guff, and a local jack of all trades there to help set things up all make their way to the remote camp. Nick Moran is awesome as the local, who right away senses that shit isn't right, and while he helps carry the early part of the movie it does come at the expense of just about any character development for anyone else in the film. I mean, there's barely even cursory cliche dialog between the students.

So the prof has set up three different crime scenes around the island, using actual corpses with the help of a local lawman, and the students split up into three teams of two and head out to meet their doom.

The film looks good for the most part, and the acting, save for a few wooden performances from the students, is solid enough. The pacing is very well done and at just over 80 minutes it never feels stretched out. The thing that makes 13 Eerie really stand out though is that the baddies are really awesome. The mutant humans look and act legit terrifying, and the gore is top notch. The kills are good, but even the bad ones are fun. Such as when a grown woman, running for her life, cannot avoid getting stuck in a thorn bush, unable to move when a cannibal corpse comes to eat her. The monster then takes it's time eating select pieces of the this dumb broad while she continues to be perilously trapped by twigs and screams not so much as if she's being eaten alive but more like she just saw a mouse.

The bad? Well there's an infuriating hum that some might call a soundtrack, that blares distortingly in moments of tension and drowns out a lot of the dialog. Both unforgivable and nerve wracking.. Then there's the complete lack of character development. The only one in the group you end up having any rooting interest in is the hot girl, for no other reason really other than she's hot. The last half hour just isn't as much fun as it could have been if I had given much of a fuck who lived and died, but cest la vie.

A little short on story, but high on atmosphere, with enough blood and guts to keep things moving along, 13 Eerie is a decent romp with the undead.


Ghost Of Goodnight Lane: 73 Out Of 100 Stars
Billy Zane, Lacy Chabert, Danielle Harris & Richard Tyson lead an All-Star cast. Ok, AA All-Stars, but still.

Story of an Indy movie studio whose offices are in the same house in which something horrific may have occurred years earlier. They've sold the building and it's scheduled for demolition in a few days but first they have to finish the editing and reshoots on their most recent film. Will whatever is haunting the building let them finish? Will lots of shit move for unexplained reasons? Will doors slam shut without warning? Will Richard Tyson die too fucking quickly? Will girls take showers for no good reason other than to show some boobies? YES to all these things. Sorry to spoil anything for you.

The tension is good, the effects are solid and Billy Zane is actually awesome as the head of the studio, delivering mostly comedic lines with aplomb. No matter how much weird shit happens, he just wants to get his movie finished. That is until he can't deny something really weird is going on. By the time they agree they all need to get out of there, Zane even stops to joyously point out the black guy, it may be too late.

So after pissing me off by killing poor Richard Tyson off in the first five minutes, an old lady shows up at the studio and sort of alludes to the past horrors that have happened, but mostly just talks in riddles and shit. It takes her a good hour of film time and a couple of deaths to reveal that "there are things you need to know", well shit lady, don't be in any rush.

Besides Zane, the blonde hottie who gets her tits out, and maybe the black dude, nobody else in the cast really stands out. Chabert, who is my 2nd favorite flavor of Chabert, right behind orange, looks good but doesn't add much. Danielle Harris is really more of a bit player till the end. The script does become bogged down in the 3rd act. The whole story of what happened in the house previously is treated like a fucking film unto itself when it need not be. The deal with how do they get out or should they even try and get out, and an apparent lack of doors, becomes a frustrating circle of bad writing that seems to serve as filler to stretch the movies run time, a genre staple, but annoying nun the less. The saving grace is that the kills are good and fun and Zanes comedic chops, I can't even believe I'm typing that, but yes, Zanes comedic chops are enough to alleviate the slow stretches.

Funny, great gore and solid kills. High tension, hot chicks and boobies, and a performance from Billy Zane that's amazingly awesome are enough to counter a bit of a jumbled script. Ghost Of Goodnight Lane is just a fun fucking pot of horror stew.

[Julio Riddols]

Have you seen 'Pieces' (1983), Suicane? If not, I would be interested in hearing what you think of it. Its one of my favorite bad horror films of all time.

[Suicane75]

Originally Posted by Julio Riddols

Have you seen 'Pieces' (1983), Suicane? If not, I would be interested in hearing what you think of it. Its one of my favorite bad horror films of all time.

Actually have it in my queue and plan on getting to it soon.

[Suicane75]

Apocalypse Kiss: 33 Out Of 100 Stars
Prologue: I'm watching this movie at the behest of my best friend, who was involved in the production. The only other movie that he's ever asked me to watch was an experience so jarring, so life altering, so horrid, that I still have flashbacks of terror when I think about it. It was the single shittiest thing I've ever watched. Even things I've downloaded from sites that had names like druggedandforced.ru had more artistic merit. This DVD was given to me over 4 months ago, and it's sat on my end table the entire time. Every time I passed by it I would get a chill down my spine. But alas, the time has come. I can't go my entire life making excuses as to why I've yet to watch it, though I've thought about just killing myself to get out of it. You may take that as a joke, but you haven't seen the things I've seen.

But for real, if I've learned anything in the past few years it's that I can get through the shittiest of shittiest movies and come out a better person, not the broken soul my previous excursion into his recommended film left me. So on I trudge, popping in the DVD that has been sold to me on the merits of a Lloyd Kaufman appearance. For those unfamiliar, Lloyd Kaufman runs Troma films. How the producer of a company whose apex came almost 30 years ago, appearing as an actor, is supposed to sell me on a film is beyond me, but I'm game. So here we go.

It's not awful. It's not good either, but it's not awful. It's so very very very muddled in excess story and unnecessary visuals but the script has more than a few bright spots.

Set in the future where the world is about to end, not that that has any impact on the story or really matters in any way. There are three main parts to story, a serial killer, a couple of lesbian killers, and a cop haunted by his dead wife, chasing them both.

The serial killer is played very well, but it's the sort of goofy, fast talking character that while amusing, has almost no depth.

The lesbians, well I just don't know what the point of them are. Neither of the actresses are very good at all. One plays a mute, then suddenly she's Russian, then suddenly she's not, and it's never really explained at all what the fuck is happening. She's supposed to have a lot of angst I think, but who the fuck knows. Their characters are all over the map. They murder, they engage in horse play in a montage that looks more at home in a silly Cinemax movie out of 1996, they have deep philosophical discussions about love and loss, none of it very engaging or good. The one chick does get her tits out a fair bit but it's not erotic at all.

The there's the cop, who maybe in the hands of a stronger actor would have come across better. The story with his wife is actually interesting, and the tete a tete between he and the serial killer has substance on a surface level but it just gets lost in the mess of this story that has about 10 too many layers.

I guess my main problem with the movie is that there's no need for any of the futuristic stuff, all it serves to do is distract from the main plot, and given the obviously low budget the movie had, I couldn't but feel like whatever money they did have could have been spent elsewhere.

The acting ranges from bad to mostly competent to a few good performances.

The script has glimmers of solid comedy and drama, but it gets insanely verbose at times. There's a ton of dialog about the futuristic setting that just feels like script masturbation and never really explains where, what and why is going on in the world. They do mention that we're in The East End about 100 times though. But as I said, none of that shit matters to the story so it doesn't really matter. Then the final showdown between the cop and the serial killer is just filled with so much talking and an elongated attempt to build drama that it reaches it's apex and then swiftly goes downhill as you're begging for someone to shoot someone else so the talking will stop.

The budget is clearly very low, almost every outdoor scene takes place in the same area, all the indoor scenes use a lot of smoke and mirrors but it doesn't make it look any less claustrophobic.

Apocalypse Kiss has its positives, but a wild lack of direction and focus only does a disservice to the stuff that does work.