So it's time for a vasectomy...... - Page 2

johnnyshaka · 01-20-2010, 04:27 AM

I'm going to be seeing my doctor about getting the big "V" in the next month or so. Two days of inconvenience for a lifetime of condomless sex is well worth it, IMO.

Now, my wife's breast reduction surgery next month is what I'm going to be crying about for weeks, maybe months.

Life just isn't fair sometimes.

tucker rocky · 01-20-2010, 07:30 AM

Funny song might fit this thread

Mizzou B-ball fan · 01-20-2010, 08:24 AM

So how in the hell can it actually 'reconnect' for lack of a better word? Do I have to tell him to tie a triple knot or something? Good lord.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 01-20-2010, 08:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dodgerchick

umm... i probably shouldn't be in here

No.....No. You're fine. You might come in handy for the next 4-6 weeks.

bulletsponge · 01-20-2010, 10:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by johnnyshaka

I'm going to be seeing my doctor about getting the big "V" in the next month or so. Two days of inconvenience for a lifetime of condomless sex is well worth it, IMO.

Now, my wife's breast reduction surgery next month is what I'm going to be crying about for weeks, maybe months.

Life just isn't fair sometimes.

breast reduction? shouldnt that be a crime? at the very least are they going to make them "18 year old perky"?

Lathum · 01-20-2010, 10:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by johnnyshaka

Now, my wife's breast reduction surgery next month is what I'm going to be crying about for weeks, maybe months.

Life just isn't fair sometimes.

Pics plz. K. Thx.

johnnyshaka · 01-20-2010, 11:46 AM

I suppose I could try the tried and true Charlie Harper method from Two and Half Men..."without your big boobs guys are going to stare at your big ass instead..."

johnnyshaka · 01-20-2010, 11:48 AM

Oh, and Lathum, we all know boobie pictures always get deleted around here...so it's just not worth the effort. Sorry.

bbor · 01-20-2010, 12:25 PM

Worst thread title ever!

Samdari · 01-20-2010, 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mizzou B-ball fan

So how in the hell can it actually 'reconnect' for lack of a better word? Do I have to tell him to tie a triple knot or something? Good lord.

Like any part of your body that gets cut, it tries to heal.

My Dr. told me 1 in 400 do that.

Oilers9911 · 01-20-2010, 01:50 PM

I bet we could raise a fortune for Haiti if we auctioned off the chance to give MBBF the vasectomy.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 01-20-2010, 02:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oilers9911

I bet we could raise a fortune for Haiti if we auctioned off the chance to give MBBF the vasectomy.

I lost this bet. I thought this post would come before the first page ended. I'm disappointed with you all.

stevew · 01-20-2010, 02:13 PM

If your wife had a C-Section on the 2nd baby, and y'all declined the opportunity for him to take care of her "While he was in there," then you deserve the nut pain associated with not making good decisions.

JediKooter · 01-20-2010, 05:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by johnnyshaka

Now, my wife's breast reduction surgery next month is what I'm going to be crying about for weeks, maybe months.

Life just isn't fair sometimes.

My wife (soon to be ex) had breast reduction surgery and she was miserable for a couple of weeks after. They went from something like an F or an H, can't remember which, down to a D. I had the honor of draining her drain cups every few hours and writing down how much fluid was in them.

Ah, the things you do for love...

johnnyshaka · 01-20-2010, 05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JediKooter

My wife (soon to be ex) had breast reduction surgery and she was miserable for a couple of weeks after. They went from something like an F or an H, can't remember which, down to a D. I had the honor of draining her drain cups every few hours and writing down how much fluid was in them.

Ah, the things you do for love...

Kicking her out for getting boob work done...man, that's ballsy.

RedKingGold · 01-20-2010, 05:39 PM

If my girl had "F" sized boobs, well, I'd say "F" that.

THERE ARE LIMITS MAN...

path12 · 01-20-2010, 06:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by johnnyshaka

Kicking her out for getting boob work done...man, that's ballsy.

Honey, there's less of you to love.

JediKooter · 01-20-2010, 07:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by johnnyshaka

Kicking her out for getting boob work done...man, that's ballsy.

Haha! Gotta have standards.

Schmidty · 01-20-2010, 08:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedKingGold

If my girl had "F" sized boobs, well, I'd say "F" that.

THERE ARE LIMITS MAN...

No.

JeeberD · 01-23-2010, 03:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

My wife volunteered to get an IUD. I did not argue.

My mom had an IUD when she became pregnant with me. For your sake I hope IUD technology has improved over the past 33 years...

Autumn · 01-27-2010, 02:00 PM

I need to make an appointment for the same, so good to see this on here. I've been wondering and don't know anyone who's had the procedure. Two days for no more worries, scheduling, condoms ... sounds good to me.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 01-27-2010, 02:35 PM

Mine's scheduled for February 26th.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 02-25-2010, 08:48 AM

One day left. My naughty parts shiver in fear of the snipping to come. If you hear a scream of death about 2:30 PM tomorrow, you'll know the source.

I just got my big ol' Valium pill from the pharmacy yesterday. Should be interesting to see what that does to me.

DaddyTorgo · 02-25-2010, 08:53 AM

yikes!

DaddyTorgo · 02-25-2010, 08:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mizzou B-ball fan

I lost this bet. I thought this post would come before the first page ended. I'm disappointed with you all.

Nah. Regardless of the amount of partisanship and asshattery in other threads by both sides I don't think anybody here bears that much ill will.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 02-25-2010, 08:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaddyTorgo

yikes!

I'm getting a bit more nervous as the time approaches. I'm 35 and this is the first surgery/incision that I've ever had (what a way to begin). Only issue previously was getting 4 stiches for a cut.

DaddyTorgo · 02-25-2010, 08:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mizzou B-ball fan

I'm getting a bit more nervous as the time approaches. I'm 35 and this is the first surgery/incision that I've ever had (what a way to begin). Only issue previously was getting 4 stiches for a cut.

really? damn.

you'll be fine. the surgeon does how many of these a year? it's pretty routine at this point (although it is your junk, so it's totally understandable that you're nervous).

Mizzou B-ball fan · 02-25-2010, 09:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaddyTorgo

really? damn.

you'll be fine. the surgeon does how many of these a year? it's pretty routine at this point (although it is your junk, so it's totally understandable that you're nervous).

My father-in-law is a doctor at the hospital and has been friends for years with the guy doing my procedure. He said "he's good" and "he really knows what he's doing". Considering what we're dealing with here, I'm not sure how to take those comments.

MacroGuru · 02-25-2010, 09:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mizzou B-ball fan

My father-in-law is a doctor at the hospital and has been friends for years with the guy doing my procedure. He said "he's good" and "he really knows what he's doing". Considering what we're dealing with here, I'm not sure how to take those comments.

He is saying the guy knows how to castrate a calf and keep your head up!

...You will be ok...my doc gave me a valium to take before the surgery so I went in just fine and not nervous.

Kodos · 02-25-2010, 09:18 AM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VZhSkREYBc

Mizzou B-ball fan · 02-25-2010, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

He is saying the guy knows how to castrate a calf and keep your head up!

Ugh, did you have to say a calf? My thoughts immediately flashed to a Bizarre Foods episode where they were castrating the calves. Let's just say the calves didn't have the benefit of a Valium or a small snip.

But in line with the title of the show, they did make a meal out of it all.

CraigSca · 02-25-2010, 10:03 AM

It's really no big deal, except when you ask them if they're done and they tell you that they're just finishing up the first one. That's brutal.

Drake · 02-25-2010, 10:27 AM

Did I mention that when I got mine done, the doc forgot to give me the second shot (topical anesthetic - supposed to be a shot on each side) before cutting into my bag?

Yeah, it hurt.

I did one of those hissing intakes of breath and the doc knew immediately what he'd done. He was like. "Wow. Sorry about that. Haven't done that in years."

He spent the whole procedure talking to me about his daughter who had just started playing tennis at the university where I work. It's weird having a guy talking to you about his daughter while he's cutting into your sack with a scalpel. Very instructional. I decided that if I ever had daughters of dating age, I'd do the same thing with their boyfriends. Keep their minds focused on important stuff, if you know what I mean.

Er, I probably should have saved that story for tomorrow.

boberot · 02-25-2010, 10:37 AM

You'll be good. With the proper anesthetics applied, there really isn't a lot of pain. The worst part in my opinion might be the really cold iodine kind of stuff they apply -- and then realizing that the medical team is staring at your shrunken goods.

Subby · 02-25-2010, 10:45 AM

Valium?

You sir, are an enormous pussy.

CraigSca · 02-25-2010, 10:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Subby

Valium?

You sir, are an enormous pussy.

/agree

boberot · 02-25-2010, 11:23 AM

Oh, it's worth mentioning:

The doc who did mine was a friend of the family and a bit of a jokester. As I'm laying on the table, knowing it's "game on" any minute, he approaches from the far side of the room and asks in a very calm, reassuring voice, "OK, are you ready?"

As I nod "yes," I look down and realize he's holding a bolt cutter that's about two feet long. There apparently was a half-second of horror on my face before I realized he was joking. Everyone laughed, including me, and I was in a much better place to have him slice into my ball bag.

path12 · 02-25-2010, 05:59 PM

Be sure and savor the smell of the cauterizing! Mmmmmmm......burnt vascules.

Pumpy Tudors · 02-25-2010, 06:21 PM

*whimper*

Mizzou B-ball fan · 02-26-2010, 09:17 AM

The day of judgment has arrived. I don't want to catch any of you fools giggling, you hear me?!?!?!

Ronnie Dobbs2 · 02-26-2010, 09:20 AM

Butter · 02-26-2010, 09:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drake

Did I mention that when I got mine done, the doc forgot to give me the second shot (topical anesthetic - supposed to be a shot on each side) before cutting into my bag?

Yeah, it hurt.

Yeah, I almost got that myself. I was able to stop him before he actually cut anything though.

MacroGuru · 02-26-2010, 10:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Subby

Valium?

You sir, are an enormous pussy.

It's SOP for this...keeps the nerves down...avoids any inappropiate flinches from you when you feel the tugging.

CraigSca · 02-26-2010, 11:58 AM

Interesting. Think I could get one retroactively then?

SackAttack · 02-26-2010, 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mizzou B-ball fan

The day of judgment has arrived. I don't want to catch any of you fools giggling, you hear me?!?!?!

If you have any male pets, I'm certain they're laughing their heads off right now.

JediKooter · 02-26-2010, 02:40 PM

SackAttack has the best screen name for this thread.

path12 · 02-26-2010, 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

It's SOP for this...keeps the nerves down...avoids any inappropiate flinches from you when you feel the tugging.

Hmm. I don't remember any Valium. DAMMIT!

SackAttack · 02-26-2010, 05:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JediKooter

SackAttack has the best screen name for this thread.

Which is why I had largely stayed out of it. But...I couldn't resist that one.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 02-27-2010, 09:15 AM

Well, I survived. Honestly, going to a doctor who had done roughly 3,000 of them before was a fantastic idea. Other than the initial needle to inject the anesthetic, didn't feel a thing. I'm sore today in the area above, but it's a dull pain and I was still able to take a shower and walk around a bit. The worry before the procedure was far worse than the procedure and the aftermath.

RedKingGold · 02-27-2010, 09:19 AM

Dude, your balls must HATE you.

01-20-2010, 12:25 PM	#59
bbor Pro Starter Join Date: May 2001 Location: toronto	Worst thread title ever! __________________ Pumpy Tudors Now that I've cracked and made that admission, I wonder if I'm only a couple of steps away from wanting to tongue-kiss Jaromir Jagr and give Bobby Clarke a blowjob.

01-20-2010, 05:39 PM	#66
RedKingGold College Starter Join Date: Oct 2002	If my girl had "F" sized boobs, well, I'd say "F" that. *THERE ARE LIMITS MAN...* Last edited by RedKingGold : 01-20-2010 at 05:39 PM.

02-25-2010, 08:53 AM	#74
DaddyTorgo Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Massachusetts	yikes! __________________ Get bent whoever hacked my pw and changed my signature.

02-25-2010, 09:18 AM	#80
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VZhSkREYBc __________________ Author of The Bill Gates Challenge, as well as other groundbreaking dynasties.

02-25-2010, 10:03 AM	#82
CraigSca Pro Starter Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Not Delaware - hurray!	It's really no big deal, except when you ask them if they're done and they tell you that they're just finishing up the first one. That's brutal. __________________ She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! She loves you, yeah! how do you know? how do you know?

01-20-2010, 07:30 AM	#52
tucker rocky Pro Rookie Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Of no particular interest	Funny song might fit this thread

01-20-2010, 08:24 AM	#53
Mizzou B-ball fan General Manager Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Kansas City, MO	So how in the hell can it actually 'reconnect' for lack of a better word? Do I have to tell him to tie a triple knot or something? Good lord.

01-20-2010, 11:46 AM	#57
johnnyshaka College Benchwarmer Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Edmonton, AB	I suppose I could try the tried and true Charlie Harper method from Two and Half Men..."without your big boobs guys are going to stare at your big ass instead..."

01-20-2010, 11:48 AM	#58
johnnyshaka College Benchwarmer Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Edmonton, AB	Oh, and Lathum, we all know boobie pictures always get deleted around here...so it's just not worth the effort. Sorry.

01-20-2010, 01:50 PM	#61
Oilers9911 College Benchwarmer Join Date: Jan 2006	I bet we could raise a fortune for Haiti if we auctioned off the chance to give MBBF the vasectomy.

01-20-2010, 02:13 PM	#63
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	If your wife had a C-Section on the 2nd baby, and y'all declined the opportunity for him to take care of her "While he was in there," then you deserve the nut pain associated with not making good decisions.

01-27-2010, 02:00 PM	#71
Autumn Head Coach Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Bath, ME	I need to make an appointment for the same, so good to see this on here. I've been wondering and don't know anyone who's had the procedure. Two days for no more worries, scheduling, condoms ... sounds good to me.

01-27-2010, 02:35 PM	#72
Mizzou B-ball fan General Manager Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Kansas City, MO	Mine's scheduled for February 26th.

02-25-2010, 08:48 AM	#73
Mizzou B-ball fan General Manager Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Kansas City, MO	One day left. My naughty parts shiver in fear of the snipping to come. If you hear a scream of death about 2:30 PM tomorrow, you'll know the source. I just got my big ol' Valium pill from the pharmacy yesterday. Should be interesting to see what that does to me.

02-25-2010, 10:27 AM	#83
Drake assmaster Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Bloomington, IN	Did I mention that when I got mine done, the doc forgot to give me the second shot (topical anesthetic - supposed to be a shot on each side) before cutting into my bag? Yeah, it hurt. I did one of those hissing intakes of breath and the doc knew immediately what he'd done. He was like. "Wow. Sorry about that. Haven't done that in years." He spent the whole procedure talking to me about his daughter who had just started playing tennis at the university where I work. It's weird having a guy talking to you about his daughter while he's cutting into your sack with a scalpel. Very instructional. I decided that if I ever had daughters of dating age, I'd do the same thing with their boyfriends. Keep their minds focused on important stuff, if you know what I mean. Er, I probably should have saved that story for tomorrow.

02-25-2010, 10:37 AM	#84
boberot High School Varsity Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Western NY	You'll be good. With the proper anesthetics applied, there really isn't a lot of pain. The worst part in my opinion might be the really cold iodine kind of stuff they apply -- and then realizing that the medical team is staring at your shrunken goods.

02-25-2010, 10:45 AM	#85
Subby lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: sans pants	Valium? You sir, are an enormous pussy. __________________ Superman was flying around and saw Wonder Woman getting a tan in the nude on her balcony. Superman said I going to hit that real fast. So he flys down toward Wonder Woman to hit it and their is a loud scream. The Invincible Man scream what just hit me in the ass!!!!! I do shit, I take pictures, I write about it: chrisshue.com

02-25-2010, 11:23 AM	#87
boberot High School Varsity Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Western NY	Oh, it's worth mentioning: The doc who did mine was a friend of the family and a bit of a jokester. As I'm laying on the table, knowing it's "game on" any minute, he approaches from the far side of the room and asks in a very calm, reassuring voice, "OK, are you ready?" As I nod "yes," I look down and realize he's holding a bolt cutter that's about two feet long. There apparently was a half-second of horror on my face before I realized he was joking. Everyone laughed, including me, and I was in a much better place to have him slice into my ball bag.

02-25-2010, 05:59 PM	#88
path12 Coordinator Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Seattle, WA	Be sure and savor the smell of the cauterizing! Mmmmmmm......burnt vascules. __________________ We have always been at war with Eastasia.

02-25-2010, 06:21 PM	#89
Pumpy Tudors Bounty Hunter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Pittsburgh, PA	whimper __________________ No, I am not Batman, and I will not repair your food processor.

02-26-2010, 09:17 AM	#90
Mizzou B-ball fan General Manager Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Kansas City, MO	The day of judgment has arrived. I don't want to catch any of you fools giggling, you hear me?!?!?! Last edited by Mizzou B-ball fan : 02-26-2010 at 09:18 AM.

02-26-2010, 09:20 AM	#91
Ronnie Dobbs2 Pro Rookie Join Date: Jun 2012 Location: Bahston Mass	__________________ There's no I in Teamocil, at least not where you'd think

02-26-2010, 11:58 AM	#94
CraigSca Pro Starter Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Not Delaware - hurray!	Interesting. Think I could get one retroactively then? __________________ She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! She loves you, yeah! how do you know? how do you know?

02-26-2010, 02:40 PM	#96
JediKooter Coordinator Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: San Diego via Sausalito via San Jose via San Diego	SackAttack has the best screen name for this thread. __________________ I'm no longer a Chargers fan, they are dead to me Coming this summer to a movie theater near you: The Adventures of Jedikooter: Part 4

02-27-2010, 09:15 AM	#99
Mizzou B-ball fan General Manager Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Kansas City, MO	Well, I survived. Honestly, going to a doctor who had done roughly 3,000 of them before was a fantastic idea. Other than the initial needle to inject the anesthetic, didn't feel a thing. I'm sore today in the area above, but it's a dull pain and I was still able to take a shower and walk around a bit. The worry before the procedure was far worse than the procedure and the aftermath.

02-27-2010, 09:19 AM	#100
RedKingGold College Starter Join Date: Oct 2002	Dude, your balls must HATE you.

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