The Mental Health Thread

[NobodyHere]

I looked at the balance of my mutual funds today

[spleen1015]

Originally Posted by NobodyHere

I looked at the balance of my mutual funds today

My 401k hit a milestone that made me happy earlier this year. I was up like 7% for the year at the time. I haven't looked since all of this started and I'm not going to look again until the Dow is at 29k again.

[panerd]

My wife and son are at the ER right now with a head injury. Good grief it couldnt be a worse time! I'm guessing the COVID cases will be isolated but still probably people coming in and it "floating" around. We have spent so much care to avoid going out at all except for grocery runs and now they are where the cases will all be! Nerve racking!

[Lathum]

Originally Posted by panerd

My wife and son are at the ER right now with a head injury. Good grief it couldnt be a worse time! I'm guessing the COVID cases will be isolated but still probably people coming in and it "floating" around. We have spent so much care to avoid going out at all except for grocery runs and now they are where the cases will all be! Nerve racking!

Jesus man, sending nothing but good vibes for them. Keep us posted

[Vince, Pt. II]

Let us know how things go, also sending good vibes your way. All our health care friends say that the ERs are at all-time-low traffic right now, so that may be a silver lining.

[JPhillips]

The ER is probably cleaner than it has ever been. Take care.

[spleen1015]

Good luck man.

[panerd]

Thanks not incredibly worried about the injury I mean it's a gash but one I've seen on my other kids that gets stapled. It's my wife and him getting sick. She said it's a ghost town which like you guys say is a good thing. Its these latent symptoms that anyone could have that suck!

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by ISiddiqui

Add to that more potential to get on each other's nerves as JIMG referred to. With the inability to go out and get away from it. I don't know how that will resolve itself.

I suspect divorce courts will be among the first areas to have to deal with a huge backlog of work :/

That said, things around my house ain't always the most ... blissful but we've done remarkably (shockingly) well on that front. Kid being home surely helps but basically we've only been short with each other one time each in the past 2-3 weeks, which is considerably better than normal.

[MacroGuru]

Update on the brother.

He was brought home yesterday. They would rather have him at home where there is almost no chance of him getting COVID vs Rehab center.

It's tough to see a man that is highly intelligent, not be able to string together a sentence, throw his hand up in frustration and then hang his head.

Again, everyone please stay safe.

[tarcone]

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

I suspect divorce courts will be among the first areas to have to deal with a huge backlog of work :/

That said, things around my house ain't always the most ... blissful but we've done remarkably (shockingly) well on that front. Kid being home surely helps but basically we've only been short with each other one time each in the past 2-3 weeks, which is considerably better than normal.

Same here. No blow ups.

Of course my wifes wrath has been directed at my older daughter who is back home from college. Those 2 are remarkably similar and all of my wifes energy goes that way.

[SirFozzie]

Today's the roughest day so far. Feels like I'm sinking into mental quicksand. No energy, no coherence

[Kodos]

Hang in there, Fozzie and panerd. I'll agree that Monday and yesterday have been my worst days mentally. A lot of stress.

[PilotMan]

My 71-yr old mother messaged me yesterday morning. She's single, and alone, and while in overall decent health, she's far too overweight with an eating problem. Has some strong hoarding tendencies. Her knees are shot and she the doctors won't do surgery until she loses weight. I've had the "you need to really get it together or you're going to find yourself with a life you don't want" conversation a couple times. But yesterday was different. She tells me that she's as low as she's ever been and she just cried.


For decades I've been telling her that she needed to start talking with a therapist. But she's fought me the entire time. I think she thought that if she prayed hard enough she'd find the answers that she needed to find. She's still praying, but last year she finally started talking to someone. She's got 70 years to unpack, and it's a slow process. Anyway, her best friend in her condo complex was killed by her boyfriend when he overdosed her on Morphine while he was drunk and she hasn't been the same since. Her other friends are moving away and she's left alone.



And now this. We did a video chat, and for the first time I saw the direction we're heading with all this and became afraid and sad. I don't want to see her like this. There's just about nothing more that I can do short of taking over some things in her life, but I know that would come with it's own set of complications. I'd never really considered the final path for her before, but after yesterday, it feels like we could be at the beginning of a long downward slide.

[tarcone]

So sorry Pilot. Losing a Mother is terrible. Video conference her daily. Talk to her. Talk about her life. Try to learn things. I regret not doing that.

Good luck to all. Stay healthy. Get outside and walk. Morel season is upon us. Go find some woods and walk around looking for mushrooms. Nature is so cleansing.

[Fidatelo]

Wow that's tough PilotMan, jeez.

[Brian Swartz]

Yep . It's one thing to know that kind of thing is happening, another to experience it personally with someone important to you.

[JPhillips]

Similar to my mother, Pilotman, although you can add in diabetes. We tried cleaning out the house a couple of times, but eventually, she got so immobile that we had to put her in a nursing home. Now I spend a lot of time worrying about whether she'll make it through the virus.

Take care.

[SirFozzie]

Thanks, I jwent back to bed and it's somewhat better now. PM, I'm so sorry

[panerd]

Thanks again everyone! Like I thought my kid's head is perfectly fine (Well 5 staples but boys will be boys and no serious side effects ect) What was interesting to me like a few of you had mentioned my wife said the doctor said the ER's are basically dead right now.

Kind of brings up a question about our health care system in general. (I kind of have the same thought about my work using high deductible plans) Maybe some of the outrageous costs and overrun hospitals during normal times are due to people using the ER's/doctor's office for relatively minor problems? I wonder if this is a "positive" side effect in the clearly awful list of terrible things happening right now?

I guess it could also be people not going to the ER that probably should but anecdotally a coworker kid's each seem to be there 2-3 times a year for various ailments. Seems a bit excessive and costly.

[Lathum]

Originally Posted by panerd

Thanks again everyone! Like I thought my kid's head is perfectly fine (Well 5 staples but boys will be boys and no serious side effects ect) What was interesting to me like a few of you had mentioned my wife said the doctor said the ER's are basically dead right now.

Kind of brings up a question about our health care system in general. (I kind of have the same thought about my work using high deductible plans) Maybe some of the outrageous costs and overrun hospitals during normal times are due to people using the ER's/doctor's office for relatively minor problems? I wonder if this is a "positive" side effect in the clearly awful list of terrible things happening right now?

I guess it could also be people not going to the ER that probably should but anecdotally a coworker kid's each seem to be there 2-3 times a year for various ailments. Seems a bit excessive and costly.

100% accurate. One of my best friends is a firefighter/EMT in Cincinnati. He talks all the time about giving people a $10,000 ride to the hospital.

[spleen1015]

I just want to give best wishes to all of you guys. I appreciate having this place to come to.

[bhlloy]

Originally Posted by Lathum

100% accurate. One of my best friends is a firefighter/EMT in Cincinnati. He talks all the time about giving people a $10,000 ride to the hospital.

Yeah, this is a huge part of our healthcare spiral. Each person who uses the ER or an ambulance for something unnecessary, then gets blindsided by the bill and doesn't pay it just increases the cost for the next person - who may genuinely need to use the ER.

[SirFozzie]

This was something important for all of us in the Post today. We feel stressed out, anxious, worried sick, about everything going on around us. We feel (in the moment), that we are alone.

We're not. Half of America admits that COVID is taking a toll on their mental-health. We're all fighting this.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/healt...source=twitter

[JonInMiddleGA]

The kid goes out (his first solo outing since getting home) to do some highly necessary banking for us (a manual deposit basically).

He just called ... the primary family vehicle has a tire going down, so suddenly & quickly that he couldn't get back home. So now he's waiting on roadside assistance AGAIN. (It's a heavy SUV, not an easy lift with the standard emergency jack & whatnot)

Just ... srsly?

Now I feel like a dog cause I didn't insist on doing it instead of him, while at the same time knowing that it's actually better that it's him since HIS phone has the at&t roadside assistance freebie, whereas mine doesn't. But, fuck, srsly?

Helluva thing to throw on top of the current mess.

edit to add: in case my rant/vent wasn't clear, the relevance to this thread is how amplified everything fucking feels

[Kodos]

Sorry to hear that. You do start to feel persecuted after a while.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by Kodos

Sorry to hear that. You do start to feel persecuted after a while.

I might as well just go ahead and add the cherry on top.

Today should have been a rather happy, even joyous, day. His first two law school acceptances arrive within a couple of hours of each other (including one that isn't the worst option on the table) around lunch time.

Instead of being able to enjoy the relief, some degree of satisfaction, any of that ... he gets this shit.

[Fidatelo]

I was super low earlier in the week (mon/tues). Found out the cottage siding we had ordered (shortly before I lost my contract and then the pandemic hit) was miscalculated and we were actually short by more than 100% of what we need. So another $7000 expense we didn't see coming. Then I also got a rejection letter from an interesting contract prospect, in which I didn't even make the shortlist for an interview. So I was pretty down in the dumps.

Then yesterday morning I got an email from a potential customer and as of just now I have a contract for the next 3 months. They clearly used the situation to squeeze me hard on my rate, so while I should be ecstatic I'm kind of a little annoyed. But it gives me a stable income to ride out the spring and a timeline to figure out my next move. And hopefully enough peace of mind to sleep a little better.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by Fidatelo

...Then yesterday morning I got an email from a potential customer and as of just now I have a contract for the next 3 months. ...

Win.

[SirFozzie]

Since I've been sharing the heavy stuff with y'all when things are bad, I think I should also let you know when things are positive.

Health and wellness update. Generally encouraging signs of progress continue, (trying to switch out one form of medicine to a different form so I don't need someone's help with it.) Also trying to get telehealth specialist visits to make up for the back log. Bad News/Good News: My doctor has officially discouraged me from going out and about, even to the local grocery store and staying in the car while they load groceries.

The good news is that she got me in touch with a service (rentsons) that will do the shopping for me and drop it off (since I'm housebound). So, things are looking up. They won't charge me since it's a necessary thing, being housebound, but they also offer help with jobs/refubishing/etcetera (like painting walls etcetera).

[GrantDawg]

Originally Posted by JonInMiddleGA

I might as well just go ahead and add the cherry on top.

Today should have been a rather happy, even joyous, day. His first two law school acceptances arrive within a couple of hours of each other (including one that isn't the worst option on the table) around lunch time.

Instead of being able to enjoy the relief, some degree of satisfaction, any of that ... he gets this shit.

That is fantastic. Congrats!

[whomario]

More 'first world problems' compared to some, but after week 3 this whole working from home routine is really starting to wear me out to the point i am taking vacation days next weeks despite originally wanting to save them for a time when i can travel again ...
Not that i can go anywhere really and haven't seen anybody from my family phsically for 5 weeks now (can't just pop by for a quick chat from a distance, too far away for that), but being able to pick the time i go to the Park and working on some stuff in the house is still a welcome change i hope.

[GrantDawg]

Today I am trying not to cycle downward. I am going to pull the grill out and throw some burgers on the fire. It is all really getting to me. My son's lost senior year. My "essential" job that is keeping me (who has not one, not two, but three major underlying conditions) constantly in public. I have known that the likely hood I am going to die from this thing was pretty high. If I don't get it being out all day, my wife deals with the same meat-head, refusing social distancing public that I do. All I have ever hoped to see is my son getting into and finishing college. My daughter married. Grandkids.....
Ok. Sorry. Cycling. I am going to cook burgers. Maybe have a beer since I haven't had one in a month. Just love.

[spleen1015]

I've been consuming all of the news I can for the last couple of weeks. I felt like I wasn't being responsible if I wasn't trying to know as much as I can.

I decided to change things up yesterday afternoon. We had major layoffs and furloughs last week at work. The guy that I work with has been telling me pretty much every day that it is just a matter of time before we get hit. I don't believe it, but it got me pretty down yesterday. Then school getting cancelled for the rest of the year means no HS softball. So, I was not doing too well for a few hours yesterday afternoon/evening.

Today, I have avoided the news and stayed out of the Trump and virus threads here. I'm in a better mood. So, I am going to stay out of it and see how things go.

[ISiddiqui]

Originally Posted by GrantDawg

Today I am trying not to cycle downward. I am going to pull the grill out and throw some burgers on the fire. It is all really getting to me. My son's lost senior year. My "essential" job that is keeping me (who has not one, not two, but three major underlying conditions) constantly in public. I have known that the likely hood I am going to die from this thing was pretty high. If I don't get it being out all day, my wife deals with the same meat-head, refusing social distancing public that I do. All I have ever hoped to see is my son getting into and finishing college. My daughter married. Grandkids.....
Ok. Sorry. Cycling. I am going to cook burgers. Maybe have a beer since I haven't had one in a month. Just love.

Hang in there GD. I know it's scary now, especially with being characterized as an essential job, but stay as safe as you can when out and about. Be sure to talk to people on the phone or video chat. Keep your mind on things you can control. None of us can see the future, but keep faith that you'll be able to see all the things you are dreaming of seeing.

Enjoying cooking the burgers. Have a beer. Hang out with your family and have some fun.

[ISiddiqui]

VRA can be applied across the country. What used to be applied to the South is pre-clearance for moving the lines of voting districts. I'm sure someone (ACLU at least) will sue as a result.

[miami_fan]

Originally Posted by whomario

More 'first world problems' compared to some, but after week 3 this whole working from home routine is really starting to wear me out to the point i am taking vacation days next weeks despite originally wanting to save them for a time when i can travel again ...
Not that i can go anywhere really and haven't seen anybody from my family phsically for 5 weeks now (can't just pop by for a quick chat from a distance, too far away for that), but being able to pick the time i go to the Park and working on some stuff in the house is still a welcome change i hope.

I am a big advocate for taking a mental health day off whenever possible. My sister in law works in a hospital. Her boss has mandated a regular mental health day for a all staff.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Originally Posted by spleen1015

Today, I have avoided the news and stayed out of the Trump and virus threads here. I'm in a better mood. So, I am going to stay out of it and see how things go.

I'm doing a fair bit of "info distancing" myself. Short of a full scale social media blackout of course that'd be impossible but I'm sticking to only skimming stuff that's large (like the full text of the latest state order) and bypassing most of the nits otherwise.

My blood pressure simply doesn't need constant provocation, it's getting spiked plenty as is. Just makes no sense to be constantly hitting the turbo button when I can avoid it.

[PilotMan]

The TV has definitely been off for most of the last few days, unless it's something streaming. No news at all. I've also encouraged my Mom that she needs to get away from it. In fact, I've shrunk my bubble down so far, that it's just family right now, and nothing more. My middle son (my biological oldest)'s senior year is lost, but I've got him looking past that to his life in college and I'm trying to eat up as much of his time and attention as I can.



Even though I'm an essential worker, I've been able to avoid a lot, and now I'm on vacation and then after that, I am now not qualified to fly anymore. So whenever they decide to send me back for training I'll be just hanging out with the family. I am really hoping that by that time, they will have gotten a better handle on scheduling instead of sending dozens of guys to sit at an airport every day.



Thanks for all the kind words regarding my Mom. We just dropped the dog and cat off at her condo for their first sleepover while we head out of town. I hope that their presence is a comfort for her for the next week. I know she's been looking forward to it.



The idea of losing my job for a year is a traumatizing thought. I am the sole provider for 4 of us, and we've struggled with rough times before, but this would open a new chapter in that. We have about 3 months until we know more, and then another 3 until that reality happens, so we have some time to prepare. Except that one is heading to college and we're supposed to be prepping for those expenses. Oh well, I'll still bank on my career and earning potential returning, but until then, damn, just gotta cross my fingers. I've been apologizing to my wife. Just for all this, it's not my fault, I don't have any control of it, but I still feel responsible. It really takes it's toll mentally and emotionally.

[Kodos]

Wow, that's rough Pilotman. It really isn't your fault. Right now is a bad time to to beat yourself up for something you had no control over. I think we're all feeling pretty low already. No need to add to that. You're a victim of circumstance.

[whomario]

Originally Posted by miami_fan

I am a big advocate for taking a mental health day off whenever possible. My sister in law works in a hospital. Her boss has mandated a regular mental health day for a all staff.

My boss is a real good guy when it comes to a lot of stuff as well, real lucky. We are a really small firm (Boss/Owner, 2 Full Time, 2 PT university Students) offering a one-of-a-kind service, essentially running a huge database service by collating grant money and stipend offers from across the globe and then get license fees from universities and scientific institutions to access for their employees and scientists/doctoral candidates. (just for some Background info)

Anyway, even when my FT colleague was out sick for 3 months recently (with of all things a viral infection) he was adament i not work any overtime and still gave me an extra 5 vacation days for the rest of the year and a permanent raise to make up for the extra intensity of the work.

So that's essentially bonus days i am taking next week, looking forward to a week of changing stuff around the flat, fix up my bike, that sort of stuff

[GrantDawg]

I was feeling better this weekend, especially since I got to run my d&d group Saturday through Fantasy Grounds. One of the group has been missing for a couple of weeks. It is not unusual, because he has been sick with a rare blood disease for quite awhile. Found out today he had passed away Friday evening. This year sucks.

Sent from my SM-N960U using Tapatalk

[Edward64]

I'm personally feeling somewhat better as I pretty much took the weekend off from the news. Did some fishing, mowed the yard, chatted with neighbor over the fence, been walking dog more etc.

Missing restaurant and fast food though. I did google that, although unproven, microwaving food will likely kill the virus. So may get some food (from whoever is still open) this week.

[tarcone]

My dog got ran over about 6 months back. He survived but broke his pelvis. He recovered very nicely. We walked him a lot last week because we are stuck home. This weekend he was hurting pretty bad. He wont climb stairs or jump on furniture.

Wife going to the vet to pick up some pain killers for him. Poor guy.

Just another layer to all this craziness.

[Butter]

Wife is a director at an insurance company that works with the poorest, most at-risk folks for some of this. They've already had several plan members die from this in Ohio. She is on calls 10 hours a day getting information from frontline workers and discussing strategy within the company itself. She just worked all weekend as well. Even though she is not out in hospitals and works for "evil" insurance, it's definitely taking a toll because there is only so much they can do.

I'm an introvert by nature who works in the grocery industry, so the hope is my job is safe, but I'm not having too much of a hard time with this. Just trying to be there for my wife, honestly.

Hope everyone is doing well, and those that aren't perhaps come to be at peace with things out of your control.

[molson]

Originally Posted by tarcone

My dog got ran over about 6 months back. He survived but broke his pelvis. He recovered very nicely. We walked him a lot last week because we are stuck home. This weekend he was hurting pretty bad. He wont climb stairs or jump on furniture.

Wife going to the vet to pick up some pain killers for him. Poor guy.

Just another layer to all this craziness.

The vet experience is more traumatic than usual these days. Not sure what it's like there, but here we have to do curbside delivery of pets, even at the emergency clinic. I guess that doesn't make a huge practical difference, but it's just surreal to be sitting there in your car alongside other cars doing the same. I don't know if they're letting people be with their pets that have to be euthanized. I did hear that one of the in-home euthanasia providers is still working, but will only do it in the yard outside of your house.

My dog had to go in for a followup to some mystery injuries on his nose and feet that they think were maybe caused by someone improperly dumping lawn chemicals or something. He's healing up well.

[SirFozzie]

I have to say that having the window open all day (it was 60 today) was so damn nice. made some of the claustrophobia/isolation go away

[tarcone]

I tell you what, I'm more emotional than I used to be. I think part of it is age, but another part is being stuck inside. And the fact my senior daughter will not get to walk, which breaks my heart.

She and her sister have been painting the last couple days and she did a self portrait of herself in her cap and gown with a mask on. Bringing a tear to my eyes as I type this.

Damn this SUCKS!!!!!!

[tarcone]

Was not part of the Dola era or at least the inside joke. But, as I sit here after having some alcoholic beverages, I feel like breaking down and just letting go and crying. Havent felt that way in a long time.

Come on inept government, figure this shit out.

[tarcone]

She painted this today