Can it get any better!!

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by Radii

I'm gonna have to respectfully disagree here man

Haha! Don't get me wrong...but, I've played through Halo Reach twice already.

[MacroGuru]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

Haha! Don't get me wrong...but, I've played through Halo Reach twice already.

Here is the sad part...I don't have my 360...the kids do...So I need to buy a new one.

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

Here is the sad part...I don't have my 360...the kids do...So I need to buy a new one.

Oh man, you need to get that fixed, soon.

[Galaxy]

Originally Posted by Warhammer

When I was on vacation up in OH over the summer, I was talking to some friends of my in-laws. They are about 60 years old and they were complaining about the youth of today. Specifically, they were talking about the women today.

They have a couple of daughters in the 20s/30s. Apparently, the daughters have been complaining about not being able to find any men, etc. The mother started to complain about how they revel in being a bitch. They will sleep with guys (she had an issue with the amount of, not that they were) early in a relationship. They could drop a guy at the drop of a hat, but would be shocked if the guy dropped them. She could go out with her friends and he would be expected to come along, but forget about the reverse, etc.

EDIT: She also talked about her kids trying to change guys. As she put it, you just start seeing a guy and telling him what's wrong with him, and there's no commitment? Why is a guy going to be attracted to that? Accept them for what they are, if you have issues move on to the next guy, don't try and change them.

Her point was, why would any sane man commit to that? If you can get the goods for free, why bother paying for it? Much less, why would you pay for it, and put up with everything that goes along with it? She lets her husband have time for himself. Whether he is spending time hunting, fishing, going to the lake with the guys, that is his time for himself. In return she gets time to go out with her friends, etc.

I thought about it, and realized that is exactly the type of woman I see down here. There was a time when women did not want to be seen as a bitch, but it has become almost a badge of honor.

The result of all this is that guys stop looking for commitment. Why bother?

A few thoughts:

1) I wonder if the legal system and the cost financially and emotionally have put a damper on how men view relationships, marriage, and kids.

2) I agree with you. One thing, at least where I live, is a lot of unplanned pregnancies not out of long-term relationships or marriage. The guys tend to be of low quality or, in a lot of cases, run away.

3) As you noted on trying to change them, this is what I meant by the perfect guy. It doesn't exist. And if they do, they'll have a worldwide pool of women to pick from. One other thing I've notice is they see themselves in a different way than guys do. They, along with their girlfriends, tend to see and comment on what a wonderful catch they are. However, they seem to be unsuccessful. Don't ask your girlfriends about how you look, act, or how much of a catch you are, ask a group of guys.

Originally Posted by JediKooter

I don't mind being single, that's not the problem. I do mind not having someone to talk to now and then that is a girlfriend. There's only so much porn and Xbox a man can do.

Two things:

1) I hear sex robots are making some great advances.

2) If she lets you talk.

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by Galaxy

Two things:

1) I hear sex robots are making some great advances.

2) If she lets you talk.

HAHA! Awesome!

[Galaxy]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

HAHA! Awesome!

Inventor unveils $7,000 talking sex robot - CNN

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by Galaxy

Inventor unveils $7,000 talking sex robot - CNN

Wow. I'm not that desperate. Looks like I'll be firing up the 'ol Xbox tonight.

[MacroGuru]

How the hell did this spiral to a sex with robots talk?

[DaddyTorgo]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

I don't mind being single, that's not the problem. I do mind not having someone to talk to now and then that is a girlfriend. There's only so much porn and Xbox a man can do.

DISAGREE!!

[Galaxy]

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

How the hell did this spiral to a sex with robots talk?

You're welcome.

[MacroGuru]

So wait...that card you have...they call it flex spending...it takes money from my check pre tax and allows you to make medical purchases. I have maxed it out with the company...so we some good money in there.

I paid the $99 for Madison at the Optometrist. I know my son Avery needs a shit load of dental work....I gave you a list of Oral Surgeons after you yelled at me about my sisters death being miniscule and I have to focus here. I sent you 11 list..not one called..

I get a receipt for a dentist, he charged me for dental work performed on the 27, the person who had dental work on the twenty seventh didn't have the rights to my card......He isn't going to like the term fraud being flashed about......And she will realize the free hand out will end....its officially over.

[k0ruptr]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

Wow. I'm not that desperate. Looks like I'll be firing up the 'ol Xbox tonight.

you mean seXbox.

[k0ruptr]

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

So wait...that card you have...they call it flex spending...it takes money from my check pre tax and allows you to make medical purchases. I have maxed it out with the company...so we some good money in there.

I paid the $99 for Madison at the Optometrist. I know my son Avery needs a shit load of dental work....I gave you a list of Oral Surgeons after you yelled at me about my sisters death being miniscule and I have to focus here. I sent you 11 list..not one called..

I get a receipt for a dentist, he charged me for dental work performed on the 27, the person who had dental work on the twenty seventh didn't have the rights to my card......He isn't going to like the term fraud being flashed about......And she will realize the free hand out will end....its officially over.

yep, time to cut off.

[MacroGuru]

Originally Posted by k0ruptr

you mean seXbox.

Found his stash!

[RainMaker]

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

So wait...that card you have...they call it flex spending...it takes money from my check pre tax and allows you to make medical purchases. I have maxed it out with the company...so we some good money in there.

I paid the $99 for Madison at the Optometrist. I know my son Avery needs a shit load of dental work....I gave you a list of Oral Surgeons after you yelled at me about my sisters death being miniscule and I have to focus here. I sent you 11 list..not one called..

I get a receipt for a dentist, he charged me for dental work performed on the 27, the person who had dental work on the twenty seventh didn't have the rights to my card......He isn't going to like the term fraud being flashed about......And she will realize the free hand out will end....its officially over.

Am I understanding this right. She had someone else use your card that wasn't your kids?

[MacroGuru]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

Am I understanding this right. She had someone else use your card that wasn't your kids?

Yup.....Phone call to the dentist begins tomorrow.

[stevew]

fuck her in the ass.

[k0ruptr]

Originally Posted by stevew

fuck her in the ass.

It would be a good option, but I think they already moved on

[RainMaker]

Originally Posted by Warhammer

I thought about it, and realized that is exactly the type of woman I see down here. There was a time when women did not want to be seen as a bitch, but it has become almost a badge of honor.

I'd go one step further and say that society has sort of glamourized the role of women in relationships. We used to have some equal footing for awhile, but now it seems like the balance of power is solely in the woman's corner.

My friend was married about 6 months ago. He works a decent job and his wife quit hers shortly after they were married because she didn't like the hours (very early hours). He pays all the bills and more or less supports her.

That's fine. But he gets nothing in return. She doesn't really clean the house, make dinner for him, or do the other stuff that might make his day a little easier. In fact, she complains anytime he goes out with us for a beer or to a game. God forbid the man who works over 40 hours a week have some downtime with his friends.

I'm not saying that's the norm, but I think it's shifting that way. I see a lot of relationships amongst people I know head in that direction. Heck, I've sort of gotten into that from time to time. There isnt' give and take anymore, just give. If a woman is controlling of a man like that, it's normal. If a guy does it, he's possesive and crazy.

Yes this probably comes across as chauvinist or whatever, but I don't think it should be. If my friend is working his ass off to make mortgage payments and keep the lights on, shouldn't she get up a little early and cook him a hot breakfast before work? Maybe clean his clothes on the weekends? And this isn't about the stereotype of cooking and cleaning. You can swap in anything that would make his life a little easier. I just feel like there was a time when both sides of a relationship helped the other out and now it's turned toward men doing everything for women and getting nothing in return.

[RainMaker]

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

Yup.....Phone call to the dentist begins tomorrow.

If this was her boyfriend, wow. I don't know what is worse. Her using your money to get his teeth fixed, or him using another man's money to get his own teeth fixed.

That shows exactly what kind of person he is. Low class pussy coward.

[stevew]

A stray beer bottle to the mouth might fix the guy up good. You've already paid to fix his teeth once, no reason not to do it again.

[sterlingice]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

I'd go one step further and say that society has sort of glamourized the role of women in relationships. We used to have some equal footing for awhile, but now it seems like the balance of power is solely in the woman's corner.

One could argue "what made it that way?" I mean, it's not as if we don't have the same legal rights so it's not something inherent in the system (unless there is a pregnancy or kids involved- then the courts skew against guys). So it's something cultural. I have a few beliefs but I'm not sure if they're totally correct.

SI

[Warhammer]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

I'd go one step further and say that society has sort of glamourized the role of women in relationships. We used to have some equal footing for awhile, but now it seems like the balance of power is solely in the woman's corner.

My friend was married about 6 months ago. He works a decent job and his wife quit hers shortly after they were married because she didn't like the hours (very early hours). He pays all the bills and more or less supports her.

That's fine. But he gets nothing in return. She doesn't really clean the house, make dinner for him, or do the other stuff that might make his day a little easier. In fact, she complains anytime he goes out with us for a beer or to a game. God forbid the man who works over 40 hours a week have some downtime with his friends.

I'm not saying that's the norm, but I think it's shifting that way. I see a lot of relationships amongst people I know head in that direction. Heck, I've sort of gotten into that from time to time. There isnt' give and take anymore, just give. If a woman is controlling of a man like that, it's normal. If a guy does it, he's possesive and crazy.

Yes this probably comes across as chauvinist or whatever, but I don't think it should be. If my friend is working his ass off to make mortgage payments and keep the lights on, shouldn't she get up a little early and cook him a hot breakfast before work? Maybe clean his clothes on the weekends? And this isn't about the stereotype of cooking and cleaning. You can swap in anything that would make his life a little easier. I just feel like there was a time when both sides of a relationship helped the other out and now it's turned toward men doing everything for women and getting nothing in return.

This is exactly what this woman was talking about. Love and relationships are a two way street. Who knows, maybe the sex is just that good.

That said, I have some good friends that have been married 8-10 years. They have three kids. The husband gets the kids out in the morning, picks them up in the evening, and takes care of them at the house. He works 40 hours a week and occassionally overnights depending on the type of calls he is making.

His wife works anywhere from 40 to 60 hours a week (she does earn more than he does). She does nothing with the kids. Anytime anything happens he has to take care of them.

The result is whenever he can sneak out of the house to get some gaming in he does. He will sneak games in because he knows outside of that time, he will not have any time to himself. He used to host gaming at his house because he needed to be around to help with the kids. Help with the kids meant he had to do anything if anything needed to be done while the wife read a book.

So she gets mad at him for constantly gaming every chance he gets. He games every chance he gets because he gets no downtime. So then they fight over it, etc., etc.

[Noop]

Originally Posted by Warhammer

When I was on vacation up in OH over the summer, I was talking to some friends of my in-laws. They are about 60 years old and they were complaining about the youth of today. Specifically, they were talking about the women today.

They have a couple of daughters in the 20s/30s. Apparently, the daughters have been complaining about not being able to find any men, etc. The mother started to complain about how they revel in being a bitch. They will sleep with guys (she had an issue with the amount of, not that they were) early in a relationship. They could drop a guy at the drop of a hat, but would be shocked if the guy dropped them. She could go out with her friends and he would be expected to come along, but forget about the reverse, etc.

EDIT: She also talked about her kids trying to change guys. As she put it, you just start seeing a guy and telling him what's wrong with him, and there's no commitment? Why is a guy going to be attracted to that? Accept them for what they are, if you have issues move on to the next guy, don't try and change them.

Her point was, why would any sane man commit to that? If you can get the goods for free, why bother paying for it? Much less, why would you pay for it, and put up with everything that goes along with it? She lets her husband have time for himself. Whether he is spending time hunting, fishing, going to the lake with the guys, that is his time for himself. In return she gets time to go out with her friends, etc.

I thought about it, and realized that is exactly the type of woman I see down here. There was a time when women did not want to be seen as a bitch, but it has become almost a badge of honor.

The result of all this is that guys stop looking for commitment. Why bother?

I agree but be careful before Karlifornia comes in here calling you a woman hater.

Originally Posted by Galaxy

A few thoughts:

1) I wonder if the legal system and the cost financially and emotionally have put a damper on how men view relationships, marriage, and kids.

2) I agree with you. One thing, at least where I live, is a lot of unplanned pregnancies not out of long-term relationships or marriage. The guys tend to be of low quality or, in a lot of cases, run away.

3) As you noted on trying to change them, this is what I meant by the perfect guy. It doesn't exist. And if they do, they'll have a worldwide pool of women to pick from. One other thing I've notice is they see themselves in a different way than guys do. They, along with their girlfriends, tend to see and comment on what a wonderful catch they are. However, they seem to be unsuccessful. Don't ask your girlfriends about how you look, act, or how much of a catch you are, ask a group of guys.

Another excellent post.

[Noop]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

I'd go one step further and say that society has sort of glamourized the role of women in relationships. We used to have some equal footing for awhile, but now it seems like the balance of power is solely in the woman's corner.

My friend was married about 6 months ago. He works a decent job and his wife quit hers shortly after they were married because she didn't like the hours (very early hours). He pays all the bills and more or less supports her.

That's fine. But he gets nothing in return. She doesn't really clean the house, make dinner for him, or do the other stuff that might make his day a little easier. In fact, she complains anytime he goes out with us for a beer or to a game. God forbid the man who works over 40 hours a week have some downtime with his friends.

I'm not saying that's the norm, but I think it's shifting that way. I see a lot of relationships amongst people I know head in that direction. Heck, I've sort of gotten into that from time to time. There isnt' give and take anymore, just give. If a woman is controlling of a man like that, it's normal. If a guy does it, he's possesive and crazy.

Yes this probably comes across as chauvinist or whatever, but I don't think it should be. If my friend is working his ass off to make mortgage payments and keep the lights on, shouldn't she get up a little early and cook him a hot breakfast before work? Maybe clean his clothes on the weekends? And this isn't about the stereotype of cooking and cleaning. You can swap in anything that would make his life a little easier. I just feel like there was a time when both sides of a relationship helped the other out and now it's turned toward men doing everything for women and getting nothing in return.

I agree with this as well. I have long held the belief that the roles of men and women need to be updated to more modern society. Men are being told to follow old standards while women are free to be "liberated."

[JediKooter]

WTF? I'm beginning to think that your soon to be ex, isn't working with a full box of crayons. That is some under handed shit. I'm pissed. I want to fly out there and kick the dude in the teeth. But, that wouldn't come close to evening things out.

Oh and I'm NOT gettting a SeXbox...

[Galaxy]

Originally Posted by sterlingice

One could argue "what made it that way?" I mean, it's not as if we don't have the same legal rights so it's not something inherent in the system (unless there is a pregnancy or kids involved- then the courts skew against guys). So it's something cultural. I have a few beliefs but I'm not sure if they're totally correct.

SI

Divorce laws (and the settlements) tend to be skewed against the guys as well.

Originally Posted by Noop

I agree with this as well. I have long held the belief that the roles of men and women need to be updated to more modern society. Men are being told to follow old standards while women are free to be "liberated."

It seems like women (again, NOT all) want it both ways.

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by Galaxy

Divorce laws (and the settlements) tend to be skewed against the guys as well.

That is true. One of my good friends has a daughter from his ex-wife. He has custody of his daughter except for one day a week. Guess who has to pay child support for that one day a week and guess who has to pay NO child support for the rest of the days of the week.

[Izulde]

I think it's that men are now expected to be both sensitive, caring, etc. *and* the traditional tough, physical, silent provider.

Essentially, contemporary male gender roles seem to be that men are expected to occupy *both* of the traditional gender spaces. To simultaneously be masculine and feminine.

Which I think feeds into some of the situations you guys are describing. What's interesting to note, as others have pointed out, is that even though men are now being burdened by the expectation of occupying both traditional gender roles, the legal system still maintains its bias towards women and the workplace, which originally was male-dominated, has now become much more egalitarian.

The Presidency is really the last bastion of male advantage in America and I suspect it won't be all that long before men lose that as well.

[Noop]

Originally Posted by Galaxy

Divorce laws (and the settlements) tend to be skewed against the guys as well.




It seems like women (again, NOT all) want it both ways.

I agree. Not all women are like that but sometimes it feels that way because so many of them distract you from the truly good ones.

Originally Posted by JediKooter

That is true. One of my good friends has a daughter from his ex-wife. He has custody of his daughter except for one day a week. Guess who has to pay child support for that one day a week and guess who has to pay NO child support for the rest of the days of the week.

Not surprised. It is far to tilted on one side but the problem is if you speak out against society will tell you to stop bitching and man up.

Originally Posted by Izulde

I think it's that men are now expected to be both sensitive, caring, etc. *and* the traditional tough, physical, silent provider.

Essentially, contemporary male gender roles seem to be that men are expected to occupy *both* of the traditional gender spaces. To simultaneously be masculine and feminine.

Which I think feeds into some of the situations you guys are describing. What's interesting to note, as others have pointed out, is that even though men are now being burdened by the expectation of occupying both traditional gender roles, the legal system still maintains its bias towards women and the workplace, which originally was male-dominated, has now become much more egalitarian.

The Presidency is really the last bastion of male advantage in America and I suspect it won't be all that long before men lose that as well.

Another good point. In time I believe there will be a social correction.

[sabotai]

Originally Posted by sterlingice

One could argue "what made it that way?" I mean, it's not as if we don't have the same legal rights so it's not something inherent in the system (unless there is a pregnancy or kids involved- then the courts skew against guys). So it's something cultural. I have a few beliefs but I'm not sure if they're totally correct.

SI

This is going to sound silly. It sounds silly to me just thinking it over. My initial reaction to every "It's (at least partially) TV's fault" is to laugh it off.

But....

For the last 30-40 years or so, every family sitcom on TV I have seen has been the same.

The Husband/Dad: Kinda an idiot. Is lazy every chance he gets. Doesn't help around the house unless forced. Acts like a child unless force to act like an adult. Needs constant "parent" supervision to keep him out of trouble. When he gets together with his friends, they act like 14 year olds.

The Wife/Mother: Is the parent of the entire household. She keeps everyone, including her husband, in line. She usually works too, but manages to keep the house from being a disaster despite the kids and husband constantly trashing it. She is, quite clearly, the boss.

Most marriages I see pretty much matches this archetype. The wife is the boss, the husband is the child. Everything the husband wants to do is seen as "childish". Any time he isn't helping out with the kids or attending to the needs/wants of the wife is seen as wasted time.

....

It's silly, I know. But it's something I can't help but think about every time my friends tell me about something that happened with their wife that sounds like it was lifted from a sitcom.

[RendeR]

Its not silly at all.


Makes me appreciate the fact that I get plenty of time for my own interests.

[sabotai]

Originally Posted by Warhammer

This is exactly what this woman was talking about. Love and relationships are a two way street. Who knows, maybe the sex is just that good.

That said, I have some good friends that have been married 8-10 years. They have three kids. The husband gets the kids out in the morning, picks them up in the evening, and takes care of them at the house. He works 40 hours a week and occassionally overnights depending on the type of calls he is making.

His wife works anywhere from 40 to 60 hours a week (she does earn more than he does). She does nothing with the kids. Anytime anything happens he has to take care of them.

The result is whenever he can sneak out of the house to get some gaming in he does. He will sneak games in because he knows outside of that time, he will not have any time to himself. He used to host gaming at his house because he needed to be around to help with the kids. Help with the kids meant he had to do anything if anything needed to be done while the wife read a book.

So she gets mad at him for constantly gaming every chance he gets. He games every chance he gets because he gets no downtime. So then they fight over it, etc., etc.

This sounds very similar to a situation going on with one of my friends. The only difference is they have been married for 2 1/2 years, 3 kids but 2 are from her previous marriage, and he finally recently left her.

If he ever acted against her idealist vision of what a perfect husband should be (which meant he had to spend 100% of his non-working time on her or the kids and doing everything exactly the way she wanted and when she wanted it), she would fucking explode. Sometimes she would get fed up with the kids, and just leave and let him deal with it. If he ever did that to her, she would gone ballistic.

The things I heard her say to him, the texts I would see that she wrote him....it was unreal. And it was constant. If he ever got a vacation from her constant abuse (which was about 3-4 days here and there), he would tell me about it and how good things were. It never lasted, of course (Plenty of times, he thought it would...no idea why). It was only a matter of time before he played a game when she didn't want him to or said something that annoyed her, and the weeks of constantly being shit on would start back up. I have no idea how or why he put up with it for so long (somewhat for the kids, and probably a large dose of fear of being single).

I keep telling him: "There's a reason you don't go out with crazy people. It's because they're FUCKING CRAZY!"

[DaddyTorgo]

Originally Posted by RainMaker

I'd go one step further and say that society has sort of glamourized the role of women in relationships. We used to have some equal footing for awhile, but now it seems like the balance of power is solely in the woman's corner.

My friend was married about 6 months ago. He works a decent job and his wife quit hers shortly after they were married because she didn't like the hours (very early hours). He pays all the bills and more or less supports her.

That's fine. But he gets nothing in return. She doesn't really clean the house, make dinner for him, or do the other stuff that might make his day a little easier. In fact, she complains anytime he goes out with us for a beer or to a game. God forbid the man who works over 40 hours a week have some downtime with his friends.

I'm not saying that's the norm, but I think it's shifting that way. I see a lot of relationships amongst people I know head in that direction. Heck, I've sort of gotten into that from time to time. There isnt' give and take anymore, just give. If a woman is controlling of a man like that, it's normal. If a guy does it, he's possesive and crazy.

Yes this probably comes across as chauvinist or whatever, but I don't think it should be. If my friend is working his ass off to make mortgage payments and keep the lights on, shouldn't she get up a little early and cook him a hot breakfast before work? Maybe clean his clothes on the weekends? And this isn't about the stereotype of cooking and cleaning. You can swap in anything that would make his life a little easier. I just feel like there was a time when both sides of a relationship helped the other out and now it's turned toward men doing everything for women and getting nothing in return.

More often than not I think you're right, but it's not the case 100% of the time of course.

My BFF has a fiance who is amazing. She loves to take care of him. Hell...last time I visisted she was trying to do MY wash.

I don't like her cooking, and she has this weird thing where she treats their dog like a kid (which fucking annoys the hell outa me), but all-in-all she's awesome.

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by DaddyTorgo

and she has this weird thing where she treats their dog like a kid (which fucking annoys the hell outa me)

Huge red flag right there.


Bouncing off of what Sabotai was saying about his friend...My wife was like that too sometimes. There was no happy middle ground with her, things were either completely fucked up or things were perfect to her. Nothing in between. If I even hinted at maybe spending a couple of hours with my best friend, she would accuse me of putting him before her. Well, actually, according to her, I put everyone else before her. Oh and don't let me NOT answer my phone when she called. It was amazing that every time I did not answer my phone, it just happened to be important or an emergency.

[DaddyTorgo]

Originally Posted by JediKooter

Huge red flag right there.


Bouncing off of what Sabotai was saying about his friend...My wife was like that too sometimes. There was no happy middle ground with her, things were either completely fucked up or things were perfect to her. Nothing in between. If I even hinted at maybe spending a couple of hours with my best friend, she would accuse me of putting him before her. Well, actually, according to her, I put everyone else before her. Oh and don't let me NOT answer my phone when she called. It was amazing that every time I did not answer my phone, it just happened to be important or an emergency.

LOL - Oh I wouldn't marry her. They've just both decided they don't want kids, so they've sorta kid-ized the little pug.

I tried to talk some sense into them, and I've tried to talk more sense into my friend about treating a dog like a dog (he had a dog, he understands), but I mean if that's the worst thing it's tolerable.

Barely though...and I can't imagine being him full time.

I mean...I think I've told this story before here, but when I went to visit them...the dog went everywhere with us. The chick wouldn't leave the dog home alone. We went into San Antonio to walk around the city...the dog came with us and walked around in the mall with us. We went out for dinner...the dog came with us and we sat outside.

She doesn't/didn't really have any friends there at that point though as they'd just moved, so I can sort of understand it. Especially cuz my BFF works all the time and was traveling a ton at that point.

But yeah...bit crazy, and drives me nuts as a guest. It's like "can't we go out without bringing along the dog and having to live by its schedule?"

Ah well. Not my problem.

[lordscarlet]

All I can say to this thread is: keep looking.

My wife is amazing and the opposite of all of the complaints here. We both let each other have our own time to do what we want, whether it be read a book, watch tv, go to baseball games, etc. We also generally split chores evenly (although I probably fall short on that measure) and if the other had a rough day it's ok to just plop down on the couch and do nothing that night. There ARE women out there who are not crazy and truly understand what it means to be one half of a relationship.

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by DaddyTorgo

LOL - Oh I wouldn't marry her. They've just both decided they don't want kids, so they've sorta kid-ized the little pug.

I tried to talk some sense into them, and I've tried to talk more sense into my friend about treating a dog like a dog (he had a dog, he understands), but I mean if that's the worst thing it's tolerable.

Barely though...and I can't imagine being him full time.

I mean...I think I've told this story before here, but when I went to visit them...the dog went everywhere with us. The chick wouldn't leave the dog home alone. We went into San Antonio to walk around the city...the dog came with us and walked around in the mall with us. We went out for dinner...the dog came with us and we sat outside.

She doesn't/didn't really have any friends there at that point though as they'd just moved, so I can sort of understand it. Especially cuz my BFF works all the time and was traveling a ton at that point.

But yeah...bit crazy, and drives me nuts as a guest. It's like "can't we go out without bringing along the dog and having to live by its schedule?"

Ah well. Not my problem.

Yikes! So they agree to not have a kid, but, treat the dog like a kid? Makes no sense to me and is very weird. Yes, good thing it is not your problem.

[JediKooter]

Originally Posted by lordscarlet

All I can say to this thread is: keep looking.

My wife is amazing and the opposite of all of the complaints here. We both let each other have our own time to do what we want, whether it be read a book, watch tv, go to baseball games, etc. We also generally split chores evenly (although I probably fall short on that measure) and if the other had a rough day it's ok to just plop down on the couch and do nothing that night. There ARE women out there who are not crazy and truly understand what it means to be one half of a relationship.

I know I'm definitely not stopping the looking. Just didn't think it would be this hard in this part of the country where (how do I be nice about this?) that there is a disproportionate amount of gay men compared to straight men and you would think the numbers would be skewed in my favor. I know if I was back in my home town (San Diego), this would not be an issue at all.

Excuse me while I go log onto match.com...

[Rizon]

Originally Posted by stevew

fuck her in the ass.

And don't pull out.

[Galaxy]

Originally Posted by Rizon

And don't pull out.

Mission accomplished?

[sterlingice]

Originally Posted by sabotai

This is going to sound silly. It sounds silly to me just thinking it over. My initial reaction to every "It's (at least partially) TV's fault" is to laugh it off.

But....

For the last 30-40 years or so, every family sitcom on TV I have seen has been the same.

The Husband/Dad: Kinda an idiot. Is lazy every chance he gets. Doesn't help around the house unless forced. Acts like a child unless force to act like an adult. Needs constant "parent" supervision to keep him out of trouble. When he gets together with his friends, they act like 14 year olds.

The Wife/Mother: Is the parent of the entire household. She keeps everyone, including her husband, in line. She usually works too, but manages to keep the house from being a disaster despite the kids and husband constantly trashing it. She is, quite clearly, the boss.

Most marriages I see pretty much matches this archetype. The wife is the boss, the husband is the child. Everything the husband wants to do is seen as "childish". Any time he isn't helping out with the kids or attending to the needs/wants of the wife is seen as wasted time.

....

It's silly, I know. But it's something I can't help but think about every time my friends tell me about something that happened with their wife that sounds like it was lifted from a sitcom.

Is it really 30 or 40? I seem to remember it mainly taking root in the 90s (Home Improvement, Coach, etc) and definitely continued into the 00s (Raymond, King of Queens, etc). In the 80s, I kindof saw some fairly even couples (Family Ties, Cosby) or shows with all parties being pretty darn flawed (Cheers, Married with Children) or a little of both (Wonder Years).

But, yes, my wife and I have talked often about this- I think a lot of this socialization has taken hold and, yeah, it's downright frustrating.

(I think a second major factor that I've seen in some relationships is that guys cede a ton of negotiating ground early on in exchange for, ahem, well- other short term gains and then wonder why they wake up one day unhappy with things)

SI

[cuervo72]

Gender in the Movie Life As We Know It » Sociological Images

Blog post which covers basically the same topic. Might be an interesting read.*

The premise dates back even further than 30-40 years on TV. The Flintstones just turned 50 (Jetsons close), and The Honeymooners predates that.


(*There was another post in the same blog where a guy said he's well off, and had gotten snipped and had no plans of getting married. No reason to enter into a contract that he said obviously favored the other party. Don't feel like looking for it right now, but he got jumped on - even if he may have had a reasonable argument).

[sterlingice]

Originally Posted by lordscarlet

All I can say to this thread is: keep looking.

My wife is amazing and the opposite of all of the complaints here. We both let each other have our own time to do what we want, whether it be read a book, watch tv, go to baseball games, etc. We also generally split chores evenly (although I probably fall short on that measure) and if the other had a rough day it's ok to just plop down on the couch and do nothing that night. There ARE women out there who are not crazy and truly understand what it means to be one half of a relationship.

+1

I'm quite fortunate to be in a marriage like this as well. But we both realize we're in a good relationship and that we're lucky to have found each other

SI

[Galaxy]

Originally Posted by cuervo72

Gender in the Movie Life As We Know It » Sociological Images

Blog post which covers basically the same topic. Might be an interesting read.*

The premise dates back even further than 30-40 years on TV. The Flintstones just turned 50 (Jetsons close), and The Honeymooners predates that.


(*There was another post in the same blog where a guy said he's well off, and had gotten snipped and had no plans of getting married. No reason to enter into a contract that he said obviously favored the other party. Don't feel like looking for it right now, but he got jumped on - even if he may have had a reasonable argument).

Interesting read.

[MacroGuru]

Home for 5 weeks now...no travel...but no pay, it's the sucky part of my job.

Relationship wise, it's ok....not great, just ok.

Its been a rough week though.

First....My step-grandma was killed in a car accident this past weekend. I was unable to attend anything due to work and having to work.

Second.....a really good friend of mine from HS passed away last night. Just found that one out...kind of makes you appreciate life.

When it is all said and done, 2010 has kicked my ass. 2011 will not...I am going to make 2011 my bitch and it doesn't know that I am going to come at it like a spider monkey!

[RomaGoth]

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

Home for 5 weeks now...no travel...but no pay, it's the sucky part of my job.

Well, get some gaming time in then, right?

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

First....My step-grandma was killed in a car accident this past weekend. I was unable to attend anything due to work and having to work.

Second.....a really good friend of mine from HS passed away last night. Just found that one out...kind of makes you appreciate life.

Sorry to hear this, not sure what else to say.

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

...I am going to make 2011 my bitch and it doesn't know that I am going to come at it like a spider monkey!

Fuck yeah, and don't forget it!

[Lathum]

Sorry to hear D...

[BYU 14]

Though it may not always feel like it, you are a lot stronger than most to deal with everything you have had to deal with this year. A much better 2011 is definitely in store for you buddy!!

Now that I am officially retired as a coach we can catch a BYU home game next year when you can make it back to Utah.

[MacroGuru]

Originally Posted by BYU 14

Now that I am officially retired as a coach we can catch a BYU home game next year when you can make it back to Utah.

Definitely...I will be hitting the Ole Miss and Texas games next season. I don't know about the home games...it will require me traveling to Utah so I will have to work that out.


I don't think April can come fast enough for me...I am getting screwed on my Christmas visitation with my kids like I did on Thanksgiving...even after telling her she screwed me on Thanksgiving and asking her to not do the same to me on Christmas and she does.