So it's time for a vasectomy......

Mizzou B-ball fan · 01-19-2010, 02:23 PM

I'm done having kids. Any advice from anyone who might have previously sat on a bag of frozen peas for two days?

tucker rocky · 01-19-2010, 02:28 PM

Use a condom, keep your nuts.

Samdari · 01-19-2010, 02:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tucker rocky

Use a condom, keep your nuts.

I would disagree wholeheartedly with this statement. Life is far better without those awful things or the wife on pills.

That said, it was the third most painful experience of my life. The first two being living with newborns #1 and #2.

EDIT: No real advice to give, you just have to grin and bear it. There is an upside though - you're on the shelf for about a week, but in the 4-6 weeks after that, you need to do the deed almost constantly to clean the pipes. The Dr. actually brought my wife in and lectured her on this point. I tried to bribe him to tell her it was 12 weeks, but his professional ethics won out.

cubboyroy1826 · 01-19-2010, 02:33 PM

After 4 kids i wound up going in and having the old snip snip. I really did not have any issues and was back up at work the next day.

tucker rocky · 01-19-2010, 02:37 PM

This thread is not for me, I'm single.

path12 · 01-19-2010, 02:46 PM

I had no problems except my balls blowing up to nerfball size the first night. Icing your nuts = no fun.

But as Samdari pointed out, you've got a great stretch ahead of you after the initial layup.

cougarfreak · 01-19-2010, 02:46 PM

No issues for me, just follow Dr.'s orders about time off, ice, etc. I was fine after day 2.

Drake · 01-19-2010, 02:50 PM

One of the best decisions I ever made. Healed and back to work within 48 hours.

I only had a bit of swelling, but was pretty proactive with the ice.

But never having to use condoms again (or worry that your wife messed up her pills) = awesome.

boberot · 01-19-2010, 02:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Drake

One of the best decisions I ever made. Healed and back to work within 48 hours.

I only had a bit of swelling, but was pretty proactive with the ice.

But never having to use condoms again (or worry that your wife messed up her pills) = awesome.

Hells, yeah.

Best decision for me too. Condom-free sex without the worry of diseases or accidental impregnation? Damn straight.

Definitely don't overexert for a few days. I was instructed to wear a jock for extra support for the first few days after. Do what they tell you to avoid infection -- other than that and the blood-chilling knowledge that a whole team is surgically working on your nutsack, no big deal.

RomaGoth · 01-19-2010, 03:02 PM

Mine wasn't too bad, just make sure the doctor removes the tape carefully....

(or you could do a no-needle vasectomy....)

JediKooter · 01-19-2010, 03:02 PM

Man, this thread is nuts.

RomaGoth · 01-19-2010, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JediKooter

Man, this thread is nuts.

If you're married, your wife already has those.

CamEdwards · 01-19-2010, 03:18 PM

General, not a local anasthetic. And yeah, it's painful for a few days and uncomfortable for a few more, but after a couple of weeks you won't even be able to tell you had someone slice open your nutsack.

k0ruptr · 01-19-2010, 03:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RomaGoth

If you're married, your wife already has those.

Lets not get testy now...

Pumpy Tudors · 01-19-2010, 03:44 PM

Jeez, I hope nobody walks past my cubicle to see me grimacing and covering my balls. This thread is brutal.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 01-19-2010, 03:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pumpy Tudors

Jeez, I hope nobody walks past my cubicle to see me grimacing and covering my balls. This thread is brutal.

I assumed it was only a matter of time before Pumpy chimed it. He says the thread is brutal, but at some level, he loves it.

Kodos · 01-19-2010, 03:53 PM

My wife volunteered to get an IUD. I did not argue.

Noop · 01-19-2010, 04:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

My wife volunteered to get an IUD. I did not argue.

Hmm... could she want to avoid getting pregnant... by someone else?

CU Tiger · 01-19-2010, 04:11 PM

"When you're talking about a vasectomy, I hope your writing down your obituary"

CU Tiger · 01-19-2010, 04:11 PM

Dola-
In all seriousness wife had a tubal after #2...I tell her all the time she is done having kids, I am a maybe

M GO BLUE!!! · 01-19-2010, 04:35 PM

I thought about getting one as a single guy, but why load a gun with blanks if you're going to leave it locked up?

I still think it would be fun to play the "it ain't mine" game and have the deck stacked in my favor.

RedKingGold · 01-19-2010, 04:45 PM

Whatever happened to just pulling out and blowing it on her face?

Bigsmooth · 01-19-2010, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedKingGold

Whatever happened to just pulling out and blowing it on her face?

Beauty.

JediKooter · 01-19-2010, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RomaGoth

If you're married, your wife already has those.

I think she packed them up when she left me.

Mizzou B-ball fan · 01-19-2010, 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedKingGold

Whatever happened to just pulling out and blowing it on her face?

You can still do that after the vasectomy. In fact, if your girlfriend/spouse is weight conscious, you can note that the calorie count is actually lower sans sperm if she were to digest it.

Consider that your 'learned something new today' moment.

Raiders Army · 01-19-2010, 06:57 PM

I was out for a month and had to have another surgery after my vasectomy. Good luck.

It is all worth it in the end.

RainMaker · 01-19-2010, 07:17 PM

Philliesfan980 · 01-19-2010, 08:07 PM

Your wife should be getting her tubes tied. You guys are all whipped.

Schmidty · 01-19-2010, 08:32 PM

I'm already sterile.

M GO BLUE!!! · 01-19-2010, 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Schmidty

I'm already sterile.

Turn that frown upside down, pal... you're off the hook!

stevew · 01-19-2010, 08:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CU Tiger

Dola-
In all seriousness wife had a tubal after #2...I tell her all the time she is done having kids, I am a maybe

lol, i say the same thing

Noop · 01-19-2010, 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RedKingGold

Whatever happened to just pulling out and blowing it on her face?

It's the gentlemanly thing to do, anything else would be uncivilized .

Schmidty · 01-19-2010, 08:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by M GO BLUE!!!

Turn that frown upside down, pal... you're off the hook!

I'm very thankful for my (step) daughter, but I would like to see little Schmidtys running around....

M GO BLUE!!! · 01-19-2010, 09:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Schmidty

I'm very thankful for my (step) daughter, but I would like to see little Schmidtys running around....

It's the cruel way of the world. Those who don't want kids are baby factories, those who do... not so much.

I guess there's no chance of doing the invitro thing? That's what my sister & her husband did. He kept saying it was her until he had to get tested & they found out his fish weren't swimming... then it was the changing of the undies, etc.

MacroGuru · 01-19-2010, 09:25 PM

It was quick and painless and I was only down for 48 hours.

HOWEVER...child #3 was born 2 years after the Vasectomy.....He is mine there is no doubt but the first words out of my mouth when she told me she was pregnant..."Is it mine" and I was promptly slapped and when I woke up 2 days later I called the doctor and took a few tests that confirmed my boys were still working.

Noop · 01-19-2010, 09:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

It was quick and painless and I was only down for 48 hours.

HOWEVER...child #3 was born 2 years after the Vasectomy.....He is mine there is no doubt but the first words out of my mouth when she told me she was pregnant..."Is it mine" and I was promptly slapped and when I woke up 2 days later I called the doctor and took a few tests that confirmed my boys were still working.

I would have asked the same thing because you were under the assumption your boys weren't suppose to be swimming.

MrDNA · 01-19-2010, 09:44 PM

Yeah, that MacroSlap was unwarranted; legitimate question when you think you're no longer packing heat.

Lathum · 01-19-2010, 09:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by M GO BLUE!!!

It's the cruel way of the world. Those who shouldn't have kids are baby factories, those who should... not so much.

.

fixed

Dodgerchick · 01-19-2010, 09:53 PM

umm... i probably shouldn't be in here

Kodos · 01-19-2010, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Noop

Hmm... could she want to avoid getting pregnant... by someone else?

I think you are on to something.

JediKooter · 01-19-2010, 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

It was quick and painless and I was only down for 48 hours.

HOWEVER...child #3 was born 2 years after the Vasectomy.....He is mine there is no doubt but the first words out of my mouth when she told me she was pregnant..."Is it mine" and I was promptly slapped and when I woke up 2 days later I called the doctor and took a few tests that confirmed my boys were still working.

You get a refund?

SirFozzie · 01-19-2010, 10:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JediKooter

You get a refund?

They offered to go double or nothing...

JediKooter · 01-19-2010, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SirFozzie

They offered to go double or nothing...

Hey-oh!!!!

M GO BLUE!!! · 01-19-2010, 11:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lathum

fixed

Thanks!

RomaGoth · 01-19-2010, 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

It was quick and painless and I was only down for 48 hours.

HOWEVER...child #3 was born 2 years after the Vasectomy.....He is mine there is no doubt but the first words out of my mouth when she told me she was pregnant..."Is it mine" and I was promptly slapped and when I woke up 2 days later I called the doctor and took a few tests that confirmed my boys were still working.

Did you get the follow-up done? I guess you are supposed to have two follow-ups, I had my first with no fish swimming. Never bothered with the second one. Your story has me worried now....

MacroGuru · 01-19-2010, 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JediKooter

You get a refund?

Actually the Doc paid for the entire child birth above and beyond everything that truly needed to be taken care of, and yes I did have to go through it again to ensure they are no longer swimming....

MacroGuru · 01-19-2010, 11:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RomaGoth

Did you get the follow-up done? I guess you are supposed to have two follow-ups, I had my first with no fish swimming. Never bothered with the second one. Your story has me worried now....

yeah I had the first one done, they weren't swimming never went to the second...I don't think the second would have caught what happened....For me, I truly feel he was meant to be, my body healed itself to be able to produce him and he is truly my little guy.

Lathum · 01-19-2010, 11:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

yeah I had the first one done, they weren't swimming never went to the second...I don't think the second would have caught what happened....For me, I truly feel he was meant to be, my body healed itself to be able to produce him and he is truly my little guy.

Thats some Jurassic Park shit.

Kodos · 01-19-2010, 11:46 PM

Life finds a way.

JediKooter · 01-20-2010, 12:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MacroGuru

Actually the Doc paid for the entire child birth above and beyond everything that truly needed to be taken care of, and yes I did have to go through it again to ensure they are no longer swimming....

Oh wow. That's cool he took care of the tab. I tell you what, your reaction would be the same as mine if I found out that my wife was pregnant after the procedure.

01-19-2010, 02:46 PM	#6
path12 Coordinator Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Seattle, WA	I had no problems except my balls blowing up to nerfball size the first night. Icing your nuts = no fun. But as Samdari pointed out, you've got a great stretch ahead of you after the initial layup. __________________ We have always been at war with Eastasia. Last edited by path12 : 01-19-2010 at 02:46 PM.

01-19-2010, 03:02 PM	#11
JediKooter Coordinator Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: San Diego via Sausalito via San Jose via San Diego	Man, this thread is nuts. __________________ I'm no longer a Chargers fan, they are dead to me Coming this summer to a movie theater near you: The Adventures of Jedikooter: Part 4

01-19-2010, 03:18 PM	#13
CamEdwards Stadium Announcer Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Burke, VA	General, not a local anasthetic. And yeah, it's painful for a few days and uncomfortable for a few more, but after a couple of weeks you won't even be able to tell you had someone slice open your nutsack. __________________ I don't want the world. I just want your half.

01-19-2010, 03:44 PM	#15
Pumpy Tudors Bounty Hunter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Pittsburgh, PA	Jeez, I hope nobody walks past my cubicle to see me grimacing and covering my balls. This thread is brutal. __________________ No, I am not Batman, and I will not repair your food processor.

01-19-2010, 03:53 PM	#17
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	My wife volunteered to get an IUD. I did not argue. __________________ Author of The Bill Gates Challenge, as well as other groundbreaking dynasties.

01-19-2010, 02:28 PM	#2
tucker rocky Pro Rookie Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Of no particular interest	Use a condom, keep your nuts.

01-19-2010, 02:33 PM	#4
cubboyroy1826 College Benchwarmer Join Date: Jun 2002	After 4 kids i wound up going in and having the old snip snip. I really did not have any issues and was back up at work the next day.

01-19-2010, 02:37 PM	#5
tucker rocky Pro Rookie Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Of no particular interest	This thread is not for me, I'm single.

01-19-2010, 02:46 PM	#7
cougarfreak College Starter Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Out of Grad School Hell :)	No issues for me, just follow Dr.'s orders about time off, ice, etc. I was fine after day 2.

01-19-2010, 02:50 PM	#8
Drake assmaster Join Date: Feb 2001 Location: Bloomington, IN	One of the best decisions I ever made. Healed and back to work within 48 hours. I only had a bit of swelling, but was pretty proactive with the ice. But never having to use condoms again (or worry that your wife messed up her pills) = awesome.

01-19-2010, 03:02 PM	#10
RomaGoth Favored Bitch #2 Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Here	Mine wasn't too bad, just make sure the doctor removes the tape carefully.... (or you could do a no-needle vasectomy....)

01-19-2010, 04:11 PM	#19
CU Tiger Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Backwoods, SC	"When you're talking about a vasectomy, I hope your writing down your obituary"

01-19-2010, 04:35 PM	#21
M GO BLUE!!! Pro Starter Join Date: Sep 2005	I thought about getting one as a single guy, but why load a gun with blanks if you're going to leave it locked up? I still think it would be fun to play the "it ain't mine" game and have the deck stacked in my favor.

01-19-2010, 04:45 PM	#22
RedKingGold College Starter Join Date: Oct 2002	Whatever happened to just pulling out and blowing it on her face? Last edited by RedKingGold : 01-19-2010 at 04:45 PM.

01-19-2010, 06:57 PM	#26
Raiders Army Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Black Hole	I was out for a month and had to have another surgery after my vasectomy. Good luck. It is all worth it in the end.

01-19-2010, 07:17 PM	#27
RainMaker General Manager Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Chicago, IL

01-19-2010, 08:07 PM	#28
Philliesfan980 Banned Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Exton, PA	Your wife should be getting her tubes tied. You guys are all whipped. Last edited by Philliesfan980 : 01-19-2010 at 08:07 PM.

01-19-2010, 08:32 PM	#29
Schmidty Coordinator Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Early, TX	I'm already sterile. __________________ Just beat the devil out of it!!! - Bob Ross

01-19-2010, 09:25 PM	#35
MacroGuru Coordinator Join Date: May 2003 Location: Utah	It was quick and painless and I was only down for 48 hours. HOWEVER...child #3 was born 2 years after the Vasectomy.....He is mine there is no doubt but the first words out of my mouth when she told me she was pregnant..."Is it mine" and I was promptly slapped and when I woke up 2 days later I called the doctor and took a few tests that confirmed my boys were still working. __________________ "forgetting what is in the past, I strive for the future"

01-19-2010, 09:44 PM	#37
MrDNA High School Varsity Join Date: Jan 2007	Yeah, that MacroSlap was unwarranted; legitimate question when you think you're no longer packing heat. __________________ Norfolk Flame (Shiba) Jacksonville Bulls (UFL) R.I.P. *Ayr Bravehearts (FOFL)*

01-19-2010, 09:53 PM	#39
Dodgerchick College Benchwarmer Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Austin, TX	umm... i probably shouldn't be in here __________________ DON'T ITCH THAT NOSE! A Meditation Dynasty

01-19-2010, 11:46 PM	#49
Kodos Resident Alien Join Date: Jun 2001	Life finds a way. __________________ Author of The Bill Gates Challenge, as well as other groundbreaking dynasties.

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