01-31-2004, 03:46 AM | #1 | ||
High School Varsity
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: St. Louis, MO
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How much would it cost?
OK here is the deal and Im not joking.
I need $$$$. Here is what Im thinking about doing. First I need a little legal advise. How much would it cost me if I went to the Super Bowl this Sunday and ran on the field completely nude? Im traveling like 10 hours from Illinois by car. I need to know gas money, food, game ticket, everything...including the legal fines and jail time. Lets say all of that comes out to like $40,000...I have no idea what it would cost. Then Im going to my betting site and betting that "A moron will run on the field completely nude". The money line is +500 that somebody will. I would then bet 7,000 on it and my payout would be 42,000. I would be up $2,000!!!!! Any thoughts?
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01-31-2004, 03:49 AM | #2 |
Hall Of Famer
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: the yo'
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If you are serious, I think you'd be committing fraud by "fixing the bet." And also, once you hit the field, you are open season. The players can hit you like you are Osama Bin Laden. There's just so much security. Id say less than a 3% chance you actually get to the field.
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01-31-2004, 03:59 AM | #3 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: NJ
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You wouldnt make it near the field, and a bunch of big burly security would be tearing at your exposed crotch.
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01-31-2004, 04:17 AM | #4 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Amarillo, TX
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Also, if you're serious about wanting to make $2000 off of a $40,000 investment, I think I might have some business plans for you to take a look at...
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01-31-2004, 06:21 AM | #5 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: New York
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3 words. Break Away Clothing. You have to look normal, but everything needs to be either snaps or velcro. Get someone to sponsor you. Radio stations are good for that. nothing like running on the field (during a time-out of course) completely nude, with "K-104 ROCKS!!!" written on your back...
Another hint... Get a heat pack and give a couple of pulls. You don't want everybody in the fucking world to see you with "shrinkage"... |
01-31-2004, 10:49 PM | #6 |
Pro Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Iowa City, IA
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There is NO WAY that you make it even close to the field, but go for it!
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01-31-2004, 10:53 PM | #7 | |
Grizzled Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Edinburg,TX
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Quote:
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, thats beautiful! LOL!
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You Stole Fizzy Lifting drinks! You bumped into the ceiling which now has to be washed and steralized, so you get NOTHING! You lose! |
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01-31-2004, 11:20 PM | #8 | |
lolzcat
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Annapolis, Md
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Quote:
Here's a thought. Until your math skills reach the point to where you realize that what you just described is still losing $5,000, perhaps you'd be more comfortable at one of our lower stakes tables. |
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02-01-2004, 12:54 AM | #9 | |
Pro Rookie
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Illinois
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Quote:
Beautiful. |
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02-01-2004, 01:43 AM | #10 | |
College Starter
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Seattle
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Quote:
F%$%&ING HILARIOUS!! |
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02-01-2004, 02:57 AM | #11 | |
Coordinator
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: The Great Northwest
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Quote:
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02-01-2004, 08:43 PM | #12 |
lolzcat
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Annapolis, Md
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Hmmm... I think the bet just paid off anyway.
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02-01-2004, 08:43 PM | #13 |
Hall Of Famer
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: New Jersey
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LOL.
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02-01-2004, 08:45 PM | #14 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: NJ
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Theres no way that was him is it?
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02-01-2004, 08:45 PM | #15 |
General Manager
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: The Town of Flower Mound
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Heh, was just about to ask if that was him...
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UTEP Miners!!! I solemnly swear to never cheer for TO |
02-01-2004, 08:46 PM | #16 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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What the heck?
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02-01-2004, 08:56 PM | #17 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Scottsdale, Arizona
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if it was him that would be amazing!
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Underachievement The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the lawnmower. Despair It's always darkest just before it goes pitch black. Demotivation Sometimes the best solution to morale problems is just to fire all of the unhappy people. http://www.despair.com/viewall.html |
02-01-2004, 09:59 PM | #18 |
lolzcat
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Annapolis, Md
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I just hope he bet at least $8,000.
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02-01-2004, 10:11 PM | #19 |
College Starter
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Federal Way, WA
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Does this make everyone on the FOFC board accomplices in a felony?(which it very well could be these days given security measures and laws passed to improve them)
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02-01-2004, 10:51 PM | #20 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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Was he nude?
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02-01-2004, 10:52 PM | #21 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: NJ
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I think he was doing a jig naked, but they only showed a far away shot for a split second, but it looked to me like he was doing a jig at the 30 yard line.
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02-01-2004, 11:00 PM | #22 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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02-01-2004, 11:03 PM | #23 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: Scottsdale, Arizona
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please god let it be him...i would simply start crying from laughing soo hard
__________________
Underachievement The tallest blade of grass is the first to be cut by the lawnmower. Despair It's always darkest just before it goes pitch black. Demotivation Sometimes the best solution to morale problems is just to fire all of the unhappy people. http://www.despair.com/viewall.html |
02-01-2004, 11:04 PM | #24 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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"New England linebacker Matt Chatham leveled the man as he ran from security personnel. The man, who had the name of a gambling Web site scribbled across his chest, was hogtied and carried off the field by police."
Hey, atleast he got to met a NFL player. |
02-01-2004, 11:04 PM | #25 |
College Starter
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Houston, or there about
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He didn't happen to post his pic in the What do you look like? thread did he?
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02-01-2004, 11:12 PM | #26 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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I hope someone digs around
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02-01-2004, 11:23 PM | #27 |
Pro Rookie
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Canada eh
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Wow, I really should have put a few bucks down on him, wouldn't have even had to pay the fine before counting the profits......
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02-01-2004, 11:24 PM | #28 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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Anyone know where he is from?
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02-01-2004, 11:27 PM | #29 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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This is from CNNSI
HOUSTON (AP) -- The second-half kickoff of the Super Bowl was delayed after a man dressed as a referee ran onto the field, stripped down to a G-string and shoes, then started dancing at the 30-yard line. New England linebacker Matt Chatham leveled the man, identified as Mark Francis Roberts, as he ran from security personnel. The 39-year-old Roberts, who had the name of a gambling Web site scribbled across his chest, was hogtied and carried off the field by police. CBS didn't air the intruder to the worldwide television audience, focusing its cameras elsewhere as he was being chased. Houston Police spokeswoman Sandra Aponte said police arrested Roberts soon after Chatham got him. She said Roberts got into the game with a legitimate ticket, and his referee outfit was held together with Velcro, making it easy for him to rip it off in one movement. He was charged with criminal trespass and public intoxication, and was to be booked into either the city or county jail, she said. "He is telling police he's from Liverpool, England. He also claims he is an international streaker and that he has done this at other sporting facilities," Aponte said. |
02-01-2004, 11:27 PM | #30 |
Pro Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Iowa City, IA
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That would be so awesome if it was him
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02-01-2004, 11:28 PM | #31 |
College Starter
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: The Mad City, WI
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From ESPN tonight:
From the official website of Mark Roberts ... The Streaker: Superbowl XXXVIII 2004 Mark Roberts continues in his passion to bring laughter to the world. In this attempt, he will try to streak at THE SUPERBOWL in the good ol' US of A! In this attempted streak:- his ultimate streaking goal to date, he intends to bring smiles to our friends over the water and billions throughout the world. Mark has had many emails from the our US neighbours saying what they need is a good old fashioned laugh, so, security permitting, that is what he will give them! He is aiming to streak just before the start of the third quarter (half time in English football!) to liven up the proceedings. He is looking to run down the line up of America finest football players, grab the ball, and score a touchdown! After his streak, (hopefully he will make it) he will be looking to be interviewed by the likes of Jay Leno before he is released (hopefully the US officials will go easy on our Mark). GOD SAVE THE QUEEN! GOD BLESS AMERICA! |
02-01-2004, 11:28 PM | #32 |
Pro Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: Iowa City, IA
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nevermind....
I think that guy was on outside the lines a couple of months ago.... |
02-01-2004, 11:29 PM | #33 |
College Starter
Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: The Mad City, WI
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dola ... no, his site is not one of my bookmarks
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02-01-2004, 11:30 PM | #34 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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This guy might find he may have a hard time of getting released. Wouldn't suprise me if he is banned from the US.
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02-01-2004, 11:33 PM | #35 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Jun 2003
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a little photoshop touchup would make that a great picture.
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02-02-2004, 05:17 AM | #36 |
Pro Starter
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Rennes, France
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mtaystl03 : Was that you ?
LOL anyways !! |
02-02-2004, 06:41 AM | #37 | |
Pro Rookie
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: USA
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Quote:
That would make a load of sense. We routinely let in student pilots from all over the Middle East just because a corporation vouches for them, but a streaker would be banned. Just the kind of thing the Homeland Security office would love to do, I bet. Ashcroft might have had a heart attack and spent all night praying after that incident anyway, so no doubt the pressure would be on Ridge to do something. |
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02-02-2004, 07:31 AM | #38 |
Head Coach
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Green Bay, WI
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If that's the fella I'm thinking of, he's already been banned from various soccer matches in England. Also, when a particular team travels (I forget which) he has to go to the local constabulatory and turn in his passport so they can make sure he doesn't try to follow them and do his thing there.
Being banned is likely nothing new to him, is what I'm gettin' at. I DO think he's running out of places to try this, though. |
02-02-2004, 08:32 AM | #39 |
Pro Rookie
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Sunny South of France
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Mark Roberts, believe or not, is a professional streaker... He has been going at it for the last 10 years or so, and has 'graced' hundreds of events, sports or otherwise in the past... I remember last year, he made an 'appearance' during the final of Roland Garros, the french major tennis tournament, stark naked with 3 tennis balls strategically placed... The guy was very recently on french TV and announced he had a major event targetted, but could not say more...
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02-02-2004, 08:34 AM | #40 |
Pro Rookie
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Sunny South of France
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dola - he also recently played in a TV ad, where all players, refs, crowd and so on are all naked, and he runs on the field fully clothed... I think it was Nike or some other sporting clothes big brand... will try and google it...
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Detroit Vampires (CFL) : Ve 're coming for your blood! Camargue Flamingos (WOOF): pretty in Pink |
02-02-2004, 11:35 AM | #41 |
Hall Of Famer
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: New Jersey
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mtaystl03 is much younger then that guy.
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02-02-2004, 11:46 AM | #42 | |
This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off.
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: In Absentia
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Quote:
I see the Fench continue to thwart our ability to stop international terrorism by refusing to pass along key intelligence information they gather. I bet streaking as a profession took a serious hit after 9/11.
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02-02-2004, 12:20 PM | #43 | |
College Starter
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: Houston, or there about
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Quote:
Streaking s a profession always takes a serious hit. I got nuthin'
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02-02-2004, 03:55 PM | #44 | |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: New York
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Quote:
Yeah. See B.S. was too busy airing other naked people and the awful song and dance that led to it. |
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02-02-2004, 03:58 PM | #45 |
College Starter
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Fort Lackland, Texas (San Antonio)
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This is the guy that ran out on the fairway at a PGA tour event wearing a cowboy hat, belt, and holsters. He then proceeded to use his fingers to "shoot" the security guards as they ran after him. Probably one of the funnier things I've ever seen.
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02-02-2004, 03:59 PM | #46 |
Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Here
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I think if you time it, they had the streaker on for around 3 seconds and Janet Jackson on for around 2.
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02-02-2004, 04:11 PM | #47 |
College Benchwarmer
Join Date: Sep 2002
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Just curious, sounds like this guy makes a good living.
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02-02-2004, 05:17 PM | #48 |
Grizzled Veteran
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Murfreesboro, TN
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Now if Mystal went through his bet....
Here's What's Going Through Mtays' Mind Just As He Was About To Streak: "I'm at the 50 yard line, all I gotta do is outrun that fatso, get to the middle of the field and do a little dance and I've only lost $5,000!" *Starts taking shirt off* "What the heck? Who's that guy naked on the 30?" *Puts clothes back on* "Yes, I won my bet!! I didn't get in trouble and I'm up $40 grand. haha!" I'm not too good at being funny guys, maybe someone else could put together a better script than that. Anyhoo, I think it's funny that this mystal guy even considered doing this. Freakin idiot. Last edited by mauchow : 02-02-2004 at 05:32 PM. |
02-02-2004, 05:52 PM | #49 | |
Coordinator
Join Date: Oct 2000
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Quote:
Hey if Chatham is out of the NFL in a few years, he should have something to put on his resume if he wants to get a job as an office linebacker. You just did it, so I had to hit it! Wooooo!!!! Last edited by mckerney : 02-02-2004 at 05:55 PM. |
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02-02-2004, 06:06 PM | #50 |
Coordinator
Join Date: Jan 2002
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I can't believe this discussion has made it so far without anyone mentioned the guy who streaked at an NHL game last year.
He stripped down to nothing but wooly red socks, climbed over the glass, dropped to the ice, took one step, wiped out, cracked his head on the ice and was knocked unconscious. They took him off on a stretcher. Probably the pinacle of UIC.
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