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Old 01-31-2004, 03:46 AM   #1
mtaystl03
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Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: St. Louis, MO
How much would it cost?

OK here is the deal and Im not joking.

I need $$$$. Here is what Im thinking about doing.

First I need a little legal advise. How much would it cost me if I went to the Super Bowl this Sunday and ran on the field completely nude?

Im traveling like 10 hours from Illinois by car. I need to know gas money, food, game ticket, everything...including the legal fines and jail time.

Lets say all of that comes out to like $40,000...I have no idea what it would cost. Then Im going to my betting site and betting that "A moron will run on the field completely nude".

The money line is +500 that somebody will. I would then bet 7,000 on it and my payout would be 42,000. I would be up $2,000!!!!!

Any thoughts?
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Old 01-31-2004, 03:49 AM   #2
stevew
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If you are serious, I think you'd be committing fraud by "fixing the bet." And also, once you hit the field, you are open season. The players can hit you like you are Osama Bin Laden. There's just so much security. Id say less than a 3% chance you actually get to the field.
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Old 01-31-2004, 03:59 AM   #3
Suicane75
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You wouldnt make it near the field, and a bunch of big burly security would be tearing at your exposed crotch.
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Old 01-31-2004, 04:17 AM   #4
Shkspr
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Also, if you're serious about wanting to make $2000 off of a $40,000 investment, I think I might have some business plans for you to take a look at...
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Old 01-31-2004, 06:21 AM   #5
BigJohn&TheLions
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3 words. Break Away Clothing. You have to look normal, but everything needs to be either snaps or velcro. Get someone to sponsor you. Radio stations are good for that. nothing like running on the field (during a time-out of course) completely nude, with "K-104 ROCKS!!!" written on your back...

Another hint... Get a heat pack and give a couple of pulls. You don't want everybody in the fucking world to see you with "shrinkage"...
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Old 01-31-2004, 10:49 PM   #6
tucker342
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There is NO WAY that you make it even close to the field, but go for it!
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Old 01-31-2004, 10:53 PM   #7
Cringer
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BigJohn&TheLions
Another hint... Get a heat pack and give a couple of pulls. You don't want everybody in the fucking world to see you with "shrinkage"...

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh, thats beautiful! LOL!
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Old 01-31-2004, 11:20 PM   #8
QuikSand
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mtaystl03
Lets say all of that comes out to like $40,000...I have no idea what it would cost. Then Im going to my betting site and betting that "A moron will run on the field completely nude".

The money line is +500 that somebody will. I would then bet 7,000 on it and my payout would be 42,000. I would be up $2,000!!!!!

Any thoughts?

Here's a thought.

Until your math skills reach the point to where you realize that what you just described is still losing $5,000, perhaps you'd be more comfortable at one of our lower stakes tables.
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Old 02-01-2004, 12:54 AM   #9
Fonzie
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QuikSand
Here's a thought.

Until your math skills reach the point to where you realize that what you just described is still losing $5,000, perhaps you'd be more comfortable at one of our lower stakes tables.

Beautiful.
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Old 02-01-2004, 01:43 AM   #10
Vinatieri for Prez
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QuikSand
Here's a thought.

Until your math skills reach the point to where you realize that what you just described is still losing $5,000, perhaps you'd be more comfortable at one of our lower stakes tables.

F%$%&ING HILARIOUS!!
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Old 02-01-2004, 02:57 AM   #11
DanGarion
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Quote:
Originally Posted by QuikSand
Here's a thought.

Until your math skills reach the point to where you realize that what you just described is still losing $5,000, perhaps you'd be more comfortable at one of our lower stakes tables.
Not to mention the % of the casinos take from your winnings. Isn't that like 10%?
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Old 02-01-2004, 08:43 PM   #12
QuikSand
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Hmmm... I think the bet just paid off anyway.
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Old 02-01-2004, 08:43 PM   #13
Eaglesfan27
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LOL.
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Old 02-01-2004, 08:45 PM   #14
Suicane75
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Theres no way that was him is it?
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Old 02-01-2004, 08:45 PM   #15
JeeberD
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Heh, was just about to ask if that was him...
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Old 02-01-2004, 08:46 PM   #16
SunDancer
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What the heck?
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Old 02-01-2004, 08:56 PM   #17
Blade6119
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if it was him that would be amazing!
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Old 02-01-2004, 09:59 PM   #18
QuikSand
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I just hope he bet at least $8,000.
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Old 02-01-2004, 10:11 PM   #19
Tigercat
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Does this make everyone on the FOFC board accomplices in a felony?(which it very well could be these days given security measures and laws passed to improve them)
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Old 02-01-2004, 10:51 PM   #20
SunDancer
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Was he nude?
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Old 02-01-2004, 10:52 PM   #21
Suicane75
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I think he was doing a jig naked, but they only showed a far away shot for a split second, but it looked to me like he was doing a jig at the 30 yard line.
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:00 PM   #22
SunDancer
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http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/playof...ory?id=1724961
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:03 PM   #23
Blade6119
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please god let it be him...i would simply start crying from laughing soo hard
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:04 PM   #24
SunDancer
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"New England linebacker Matt Chatham leveled the man as he ran from security personnel. The man, who had the name of a gambling Web site scribbled across his chest, was hogtied and carried off the field by police."

Hey, atleast he got to met a NFL player.
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:04 PM   #25
Tasan
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He didn't happen to post his pic in the What do you look like? thread did he?
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:12 PM   #26
SunDancer
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I hope someone digs around
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:23 PM   #27
Travis
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Wow, I really should have put a few bucks down on him, wouldn't have even had to pay the fine before counting the profits......
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:24 PM   #28
SunDancer
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Anyone know where he is from?
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:27 PM   #29
SunDancer
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This is from CNNSI


HOUSTON (AP) -- The second-half kickoff of the Super Bowl was delayed after a man dressed as a referee ran onto the field, stripped down to a G-string and shoes, then started dancing at the 30-yard line.

New England linebacker Matt Chatham leveled the man, identified as Mark Francis Roberts, as he ran from security personnel. The 39-year-old Roberts, who had the name of a gambling Web site scribbled across his chest, was hogtied and carried off the field by police.

CBS didn't air the intruder to the worldwide television audience, focusing its cameras elsewhere as he was being chased.

Houston Police spokeswoman Sandra Aponte said police arrested Roberts soon after Chatham got him.

She said Roberts got into the game with a legitimate ticket, and his referee outfit was held together with Velcro, making it easy for him to rip it off in one movement. He was charged with criminal trespass and public intoxication, and was to be booked into either the city or county jail, she said.

"He is telling police he's from Liverpool, England. He also claims he is an international streaker and that he has done this at other sporting facilities," Aponte said.
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:27 PM   #30
tucker342
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That would be so awesome if it was him
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:28 PM   #31
Craptacular
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From ESPN tonight:


From the official website of Mark Roberts ... The Streaker:

Superbowl XXXVIII 2004

Mark Roberts continues in his passion to bring laughter to the world. In this attempt, he will try to streak at THE SUPERBOWL in the good ol' US of A!

In this attempted streak:- his ultimate streaking goal to date, he intends to bring smiles to our friends over the water and billions throughout the world.

Mark has had many emails from the our US neighbours saying what they need is a good old fashioned laugh, so, security permitting, that is what he will give them!

He is aiming to streak just before the start of the third quarter (half time in English football!) to liven up the proceedings. He is looking to run down the line up of America finest football players, grab the ball, and score a touchdown!

After his streak, (hopefully he will make it) he will be looking to be interviewed by the likes of Jay Leno before he is released (hopefully the US officials will go easy on our Mark).

GOD SAVE THE QUEEN!
GOD BLESS AMERICA!
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:28 PM   #32
tucker342
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nevermind....

I think that guy was on outside the lines a couple of months ago....
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:29 PM   #33
Craptacular
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dola ... no, his site is not one of my bookmarks
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:30 PM   #34
SunDancer
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This guy might find he may have a hard time of getting released. Wouldn't suprise me if he is banned from the US.
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Old 02-01-2004, 11:33 PM   #35
yabanci
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a little photoshop touchup would make that a great picture.
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Old 02-02-2004, 05:17 AM   #36
Alf
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mtaystl03 : Was that you ?

LOL anyways !!
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Old 02-02-2004, 06:41 AM   #37
Tekneek
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SunDancer
This guy might find he may have a hard time of getting released. Wouldn't suprise me if he is banned from the US.

That would make a load of sense. We routinely let in student pilots from all over the Middle East just because a corporation vouches for them, but a streaker would be banned. Just the kind of thing the Homeland Security office would love to do, I bet. Ashcroft might have had a heart attack and spent all night praying after that incident anyway, so no doubt the pressure would be on Ridge to do something.
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Old 02-02-2004, 07:31 AM   #38
SackAttack
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If that's the fella I'm thinking of, he's already been banned from various soccer matches in England. Also, when a particular team travels (I forget which) he has to go to the local constabulatory and turn in his passport so they can make sure he doesn't try to follow them and do his thing there.

Being banned is likely nothing new to him, is what I'm gettin' at.

I DO think he's running out of places to try this, though.
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Old 02-02-2004, 08:32 AM   #39
fantastic flying froggies
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Mark Roberts, believe or not, is a professional streaker... He has been going at it for the last 10 years or so, and has 'graced' hundreds of events, sports or otherwise in the past... I remember last year, he made an 'appearance' during the final of Roland Garros, the french major tennis tournament, stark naked with 3 tennis balls strategically placed... The guy was very recently on french TV and announced he had a major event targetted, but could not say more...
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Old 02-02-2004, 08:34 AM   #40
fantastic flying froggies
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dola - he also recently played in a TV ad, where all players, refs, crowd and so on are all naked, and he runs on the field fully clothed... I think it was Nike or some other sporting clothes big brand... will try and google it...
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Old 02-02-2004, 11:35 AM   #41
Eaglesfan27
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mtaystl03 is much younger then that guy.
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Old 02-02-2004, 11:46 AM   #42
Ksyrup
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fantastic flying froggies
The guy was very recently on french TV and announced he had a major event targetted, but could not say more...

I see the Fench continue to thwart our ability to stop international terrorism by refusing to pass along key intelligence information they gather.

I bet streaking as a profession took a serious hit after 9/11.
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Old 02-02-2004, 12:20 PM   #43
Tasan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ksyrup

I bet streaking as a profession took a serious hit after 9/11.

Streaking s a profession always takes a serious hit.


I got nuthin'
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Old 02-02-2004, 03:55 PM   #44
BigJohn&TheLions
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SunDancer
CBS didn't air the intruder to the worldwide television audience, focusing its cameras elsewhere as he was being chased.

Yeah. See B.S. was too busy airing other naked people and the awful song and dance that led to it.
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Old 02-02-2004, 03:58 PM   #45
The_herd
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This is the guy that ran out on the fairway at a PGA tour event wearing a cowboy hat, belt, and holsters. He then proceeded to use his fingers to "shoot" the security guards as they ran after him. Probably one of the funnier things I've ever seen.
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Old 02-02-2004, 03:59 PM   #46
Easy Mac
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I think if you time it, they had the streaker on for around 3 seconds and Janet Jackson on for around 2.
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Old 02-02-2004, 04:11 PM   #47
SunDancer
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Just curious, sounds like this guy makes a good living.
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Old 02-02-2004, 05:17 PM   #48
mauchow
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Location: Murfreesboro, TN
Now if Mystal went through his bet....

Here's What's Going Through Mtays' Mind Just As He Was About To Streak:

"I'm at the 50 yard line, all I gotta do is outrun that fatso, get to the middle of the field and do a little dance and I've only lost $5,000!" *Starts taking shirt off*

"What the heck? Who's that guy naked on the 30?" *Puts clothes back on*

"Yes, I won my bet!! I didn't get in trouble and I'm up $40 grand. haha!"

I'm not too good at being funny guys, maybe someone else could put together a better script than that. Anyhoo, I think it's funny that this mystal guy even considered doing this. Freakin idiot.

Last edited by mauchow : 02-02-2004 at 05:32 PM.
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Old 02-02-2004, 05:52 PM   #49
mckerney
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SunDancer
"New England linebacker Matt Chatham leveled the man as he ran from security personnel. The man, who had the name of a gambling Web site scribbled across his chest, was hogtied and carried off the field by police."

Hey, atleast he got to met a NFL player.

Hey if Chatham is out of the NFL in a few years, he should have something to put on his resume if he wants to get a job as an office linebacker.

You just did it, so I had to hit it! Wooooo!!!!

Last edited by mckerney : 02-02-2004 at 05:55 PM.
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Old 02-02-2004, 06:06 PM   #50
Maple Leafs
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I can't believe this discussion has made it so far without anyone mentioned the guy who streaked at an NHL game last year.

He stripped down to nothing but wooly red socks, climbed over the glass, dropped to the ice, took one step, wiped out, cracked his head on the ice and was knocked unconscious. They took him off on a stretcher.

Probably the pinacle of UIC.
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