GoldenScribeGuy’s Guide to the FOFC Golden Scribe Awards

[Kodos]

What follows is GoldenScribeGuy's guide to the First Annual Golden Scribe awards

P.S. - This is a GREAT way to pad one's post count...

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:
The first of the Golden Scribe Finalists have been announced for 2002 and you know what that means. It’s time to handicap the field. Who are the pretenders, and who has a legitimate shot of taking home the Golden Scribe Trophy. (BTW, the sculptor that designed the trophy needs to be flogged. The statuette looks like some sort of golden asshat, but I digress)

Let’s start with the TCY dynasties:

Five Great Men, The College Years, by stkelly52.
This was a unique dynasty since we followed players instead of a team. That uniqueness will go a long way in separating stkelly52’s dynasty from the rest of the field. However, he did make us wait in a long summer hiatus. That may hurt his chances at a statuette. The academy voters don’t take kindly to delays in posting, even for a quality dynasty like the 5 Great Men. Despite the long break, I think this one is the frontrunner.
GSG Odds: 3-2

Indiana: A TCY Village Challenge, by 3ric, Alf, andy m, bigjdotcom01, Cornhuskerly, and RPI-Fan.
You’ve gotta love these guys. 28 years of futility before they finally get to postseason play. You definitely have to admire their persistence. This group of guys might win this category based on sheer longevity. It’s also a pretty good read.
GSG Odds: 2-1

Poop on the Golden Helmets Challenge (A TCY Dynasty?), by Godzilla Blitz.
A high quality dynasty, but much too short to be a serious contender for an award. Then again Anthony Hopkins won best actor for 11 minutes of screen time in Silence of the Lambs. Is Godzilla Blitz the Hannibal Lector of TCY? Will he eat up the competition? Although, not one of the favorites, you can never count out GB.
GSG Odds: 5-1

Rutgers...The Birthplace of College Football, by cthomer5000.
This one is my personal favorite pure TCY dynasty. It should win something, just for the Rutgers fight song alone.

The bells of Queens each victory shout
The bells of Queens must ring tonight.
Football fight song or PrideFest theme. You make the call.

Seriously, I do like the no nonsense approach of cthomer5000’s dynasty reports. It is unfortunate for him that he is up against such tough competition.
GSG Odds: 7-1

Ursidae 2001-2005: Conception, by Cornhuskerly.
Right off the bat we have a problem. Latin in the title? I don’t think the academy is impressed. Actually, once you get past the pretentious title, you find a very solid dynasty writeup. Like the Rutgers entry, this one will probably get buried because of the quality of the competition
GSG Odds: 14-1

‘till next time,
GSG

[Kodos]

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:
Although soccer not a real sport, the CM dynasties do fairly well here at FOFC. Let take a look at this year’s finalists

CM - Lincoln City, by QuikSand.
Anything written by QuikSand is a good read, and the Lincoln City dynasty is no exception. Taking a division three team to the premiership is no mean feat, yet QS managed to do it. Quality writing, a compelling story and the author is the most prolific poster at FOFC. Is it any wonder that this dynasty was nominated? The rise and especially the fall of QS at Lincoln was one of the best reads of the year. This one is the odds-on favorite.
GSG Odds: 1-2

Bristol Rovers, CM, by Radii.
Radii, also took a division three team to the premiership. He seemed to be on the upswing at the end of his 17th season, before “real life” interfered and shut down his dynasty posting. Being busy with a new job is no excuse for not completing a dynasty thread. The Rover dynasty is the longest of this bunch and that may help it overcome the odds and win a Golden Scribe Award.
GSG Odds: 3-1

Adventures in Babysitting: CM – Dag & Red, by SplitPersonality1.
Although a good dynasty report, SP1 copied the format of QuikSand’s dynasty and tried to do the master one better by starting in the English Conference. Moderately successful, SplitP’s Daggers have moved up to division three. This is the only dynasty in this category that seems to be active. However, the long delays between postings will hurt this one’s chances.
GSG Odds: 12-1

(Not American) Football!, by Chief Rum.
Chief Rum is yet another American trying to make a splash in the world of English football. He and Quiksand are the only two entries in this category that have been fired from their jobs. The Chief was rehired twice and it was interesting to follow his exploits in new surroundings. Unfortunately for Chief Rum, this dynasty may be a tad short (just four seasons) to get a Golden Scribe.
GSG Odds: 12-1

'til next time
GSG

[Kodos]

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:

From the GSG Dictionary:
Baseball - noun 1.An antiquated sport where whiny millionaires on performing enhancement drugs ruminate on the past and the “sanctity” of the game.

Although major league baseball still considers itself “America’s pastime”, there were only three dynasties that qualified for the Golden Scribes in 2002. Some might argue that the low amount of baseball dynasties is due to the fact that the FOFC is primarily a football forum. If that is true, then why are there almost as many stories about Europa Universalis, a strategy wargame. But I digress.

Poop On The Pinstripes, by Godzilla Blitz.
This brilliant anti-dynasty is a personal favorite. I like the Red Sox and I completely despise the Yankees. Despite an unusual storyline, (it involves an ancient samurai, aliens and the potential destruction of the planet – just read it – it’s great stuff), I believe that this dynasty is Godzill’a Blitz’s best shot at a statuette. Although, one has to wonder about GB’s fascination with “Poop”.
GSG Odds: 4-1

John Christopher, Superstar!! An OOTP4 Personal Dynasty, by Honolulu Blue
Mr. Blue is another consistent contributor to the Dynasty forum. With the sheer number and variety of topics he has chronicled, he is like the Bruce Jenner of the FOFC. In this excellent dynasty, we follow John Christopher from his modest rookie beginnings, to the multiple MVP seasons, and into the career twilight of a baseball superstar. A very good read and one of the two favorites in this category.
GSG Odds: 4-1

Cleveland Cosmos (nee Indians) BBM2K3 Dynasty, by Dark Cloud.
Poor Dark Cloud - all of the odds are stacked against him. He is a relative unknown at FOFC, he did not start his dynasty until days before the Golden Scribes were nominated, and he is going up against two powerhouse dynasty writers. Having said that, I believe he has a chance to pull off the upset. His dynasty is deep and very well written. In fact, I would rather follow his alternative league as opposed to the real thing. GB & HB may split votes and give Dark Cloud a fighting chance at the prize. Dark Cloud is the dark horse. Do not count him out.
GSG Odds: 20-1

Of the categories that have been released so far, I think this baseball one will be the most hotly contested.

Next up, basketball.

‘till next time
GSG

[Kodos]

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:
It took me a bit of time to review the basketball dynasties as I had not read any of the three finalists previously. Threadjudice in action I suppose. After reading these, I realize that I should probably give any dynasty thread a chance, even if it’s in a topic that normally wouldn’t appeal to me. There is a lot of quality writing here at FOFC. Anyway, here are my impressions of the three roundball finalists.

CAD Strikes Again, by JonInMiddleGA.
I received an education while reading this dynasty. I learned a bit about CAD, a bit about the Atlantic Sun Conference and a bit about the humor of JonInMiddleGA.

In his first season, Jon commented about the poor quality of the players that he inherited.
I chuckled out loud at that one. Comments like this are sprinkled throughout Jon’s chronicling of the Mercer Bears. Even if you don’t follow basketball, give this one a chance.
GSG Odds: 1-5

FBB: Sacramento Emperors, by RPI-Fan.
The NBA is the setting of this b-ball dynasty. What I like most about it is the format. An NBA season can last an unmercifully long period of time and RPI-Fan gets it right by summarizing the season in 10-20 day chunks. He also details key and playoff games, gives “where are they now” updates on players and throws in random Seinfeld references. I especially like the playoff capsules and the “keys to success”. Nice touch.

Spanning just six seasons, the Emperor dynasty may be a bit short to capture a Golden Scribe.
GSG Odds: 4-1

Shorty's CAD Dynasty, by Shorty.
For four days in May, Shorty kept the college basketball faithful enthralled by recounting the adventures of the Ohio Bobcats. It was a good read, but Shorty, the dope, accidentally saved over his gamefile. I was genuinely interested in that Ohio team and wanted to see them improve. Would they continue to dominate the MAC? Would they ever win the big one? The world will never know.
GSG Odds: 25-1

Next up: "Other sports"

'till next time
GSG

[Kodos]

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:

The competition really heats up in the "other sport" category. There doesn't seem to be any clear-cut heavy favorite

FOFC Racing, by Render and Shorty.
Wow. That's what went through my mind as I began reading this dynasty thread and the accompanying webpage. NASCAR is one of the fastest growing sports in the US and I can see why. When you have fans devoted to a webpage about a fictional league, and that league was formed on a BB devoted to a completely different sport, you have made the big time.

I am not a huge gearhead, but I will probably spend a little more time keeping up with this thread. Who knows, maybe I will participate next season.
GSG Odds: 2-1

The QuikSand Ranch Rides Yet Again, by QuikSand.
Horseracing. The Sport of Kings. Here is another sport that is gaining popularity across the country. Quiksand uses this dynasty to go behind the scenes and view the sport from the horse owner's perspective. QS creates a dynasty that captures the nature of the sport and teaches the reader a thing or two about the racing business. Unfortunately, the game (Quarterpole Plus) is not nearly as good as the player and has too many flaws. I am assuming that's why the thread suddenly ends.

Despite the abrupt ending of the thread, any dynasty created by Quiksand will be a major contender in any category. I am looking forward to the day when there is a quality horse racing simulation worthy of his time and effort.
GSG Odds: 5-2

Release The Hounds, by Honolulu Blue.
This dynasty has one of the better thread titles out there. We are lucky he didn't go with some of his original titles.

- Who Let the Dogs Out?
- Kennel Fun
- Being A Bitch Is A Good Thing (sometimes)
- Wabbit Season
- Leave The Driving To Us
- Dog Eat Dog
- Going Round In Circles
- Woof! Here It Is!

"Kennel Fun"? What were you thinking, man! Truly painful!

Despite that near faux paus, Mr. Blue has written a solid dynasty about lovable skinny bitches. (That could be a thread title for my Supermodel dynasty.Hmmmmm). Sorry.

Anyway, HB's dynasty is another example of a person taking an old game (Greyhound from 1993), giving it some house rules (run for ten years), and writing a compelling story. I actually learned a bit about the Greyhound racing industry from this dynasty as well. Two opposable thumbs way up on this one.
GSG Odds: 3-1

Saving Hockey In Canada, by Travis.
Eastside Hockey is one of those games that has been sitting on my hard drive for a very long time. I fully intend to check it out, but never really get around to it. That may change soon after reading this dynasty. The game looks deep with junior and minor league teams.

Travis made this dynasty somewhat interactive by incorporating FOFC'ers into the junior ranks. That always goes over well with the academy voters. Unfortunately, this dynasty just stopped after about a month. What happens next? The short length of this dynasty will hurt it's chances of getting a Golden Scribe.
GSG Odds: 5-1

Overall, an incredibly competitive group of entries.

'till next time
GSG

[Kodos]

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:


Non-Sports

Too bad this broad category couldn’t be split out a bit. I can think of several high-quality dynasties that will be left out in the cold because of Kodo’s arbitrary decision to lump all of these threads in one place. Oh well. Maybe he will come to his senses next year.

Here is my take on the competition in 2002.

X-COM II: The Earth's Revenge, by Godzilla Blitz.
X-COM: The 800-lb gorilla of the non-sport category. FOFC’er Vince was the original brainchild behind the original X-COM thread, but GB has refined the idea and created an interactive masterpiece. The mission write-ups are well written, and the SkyRanger pilot/ fortune cookie teasers are just plain cruel. However, the strength of this thread is in the FOFC agent comments between missions. The adrenaline/laxative mix-up was one of the funniest things I have read in a long time. Some of you guys need to take the time to write your own dynasties.

I feel for the other finalists in this category. With the involvement of so many FOFC posters, I just don’t see how GB can be beaten.
GSG Odds: 1-4

MTW: Poland Shall Rise Again!, by Chief Rum.
This strategy wargame thread follows the tradition started by (of all people) Godzilla Blitz in the original Europa Universalis dynasty. There have been a few other attempts in this genre, but none of them seemed to have the legs necessary to become a Golden Scribe finalist. But this one does.
In the last two months, Chief Rum has logged over 100 years of gameplay and I for one have enjoyed every minute of it. Hopefully the academy voters enjoy it as well.
GSG Odds: 10-1

13th FOFC Bomber Squadron (Interactive B-17 Dynasty), by WSUCougar.
The latest in interactive dynasties, Cougar’s story centers around “the Greatest Generation” and bombing runs over Germany. This thread is another case of interactive participants doing a fine job of moving the story along. You also have to love some of the plane names - Pull My Finger, Yummy Goat Cheese and Oink Oink Great stuff.
Again, Cougar has the unfortunate distinction of going up against the Blitz.
GSG Odds: 10-1

24: A Day in the Life of John Bravo, by AnalBumCover.
ABC is a newbie. He came on the scene in November 2002 and has already established himself as a regular here at FOFC. If this dynasty is any indication, we can expect good things from him in the future

This collaborative dynasty follows the tales and travails of one FOFC lurker named John Bravo. (Do we have a fan of the Cartoon Network in our midst? Or perhaps a Brady Bunch groupie) Anyway, ABC and three other writers (WSUCougar, cthomer5000 & Chief Rum) take turns telling John’s story. The story is interesting so far, but at just 14 posts, it is by far the shortest of the Golden Scribe finalists.

It seems like ABC is willing to continue the thread, but the other three guys are a bunch of slackers. Two of them are directly competing with this thread. Are they afraid of a little competition? Maybe they will get their act together after the first of the year and continue this thing. If so, we may see John Bravo nominated again in 2003.

Damn. My tooth hurts.
GSG Odds: 20-1

Tough draw for some of these guys. I think the real battle will be for second place.


If you get a Golden Asshat for winning a category, what would you win for finishing second? – Maybe I don’t really want to know.

‘til next time
GSG

This collaborative dynasty follows the tails and travails of one FOFC lurker named John Bravo.

I'm surprised I didn't take flak for this one!

[Kodos]

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:


Finally. The Football (FOF) category.

Before I get into my picks I just want to mention that there are a ton of high quality dynasties that did not make the final cut. Kodos named four that were nominated (Quiksand’s Buffalo Soldiers, Anxiety’s FOF/TCY cross-dynasty, HB’s Not the NFL and QS’s Return to the Island of Misfit Toys), but I can think of several more that deserve honorable mention.

SkyDog’s – Hartford Nor’Easters
CThomers’ version of the Island of Misfit Toys
CThomer’s Fresh Young beavers (although he should be shot for the title)

What about the Phoenix Flames, the Lexington Thoroughbreds, the LA Diablos etc. I’m sure I’ve missed a few more good ones in there, but all of these guys need to be commended. Writing dynasties is hard work.
[stepping off soap box]


Here is my take on the 2002 FOF finalists:

Five Great Men: The NFL Years, by stkelly52.
“The Five Great Men” was one of the most original ideas to come out of the creative minds of the 2002 dynasty writers. I think it is very fortunate for the author that most of these "great men" played a significant role on their respective teams and made several Super Bowl appearances. It made for an engrossing and entertaining read. I give a slight advantage to stkelly52 winning the Golden Scribe because I think votes will split on the two FOFC “legends” Kodos and Quiksand
GSG Odds: 2-1

The Bill Gates Challenge, by Kodos.
This anti-dynasty has become an FOFC classic. A good storyline, humor and quality writing make this dynasty one of the all-time greats. Due to the latest wrinkle in his dynasty (Bill Gates’ money ultimatum), the future looks grim for our alien friend. However, a Golden Scribe Award just might give Kodos the incentive to continue the Bill Gates Challenge after 2018. The only problem I see is the inherent conflict of interest. The awards promoter is also a dynasty finalist. The academy voters may hold back a statuette due to this little controversy. That, and the fact that he has very strong competition
GSG Odds: 3-1

House Arrest Black Squirrels, by QuikSand.
I do not have this one listed as the favorite to win the FOF Golden Scribe category for reasons I will detail below. However, this is perhaps the best dynasty ever written. Period.

The “House Arrest” rules or variations of it are found in many other dynasties. The format and writing style in this thread have also been copied by scores of dynasty posters. Quiksand showed many readers that by negating some of the glaring AI weaknesses, one could extend the playability of the game. I know that I am not the only one who read all 49 seasons of this mammoth tome.

If that is true GSG, why won’t it win. A couple of reasons. Firstly, it is a very old thread. This may be the first opportunity for many newbies to read this dynasty. Secondly, to many, it may seem very “old school”. Most dynasties now have nifty storylines or are “anti-dynasties” or have some other hook to draw the reader in. The Black Squirrels dynasty is “only” a solid piece of writing, written by a man who really knows football.
GSG Odds: 3-1

The Second Chance League, by Honolulu Blue.
Honolulu Blue has got terrible luck. He goes against Godzilla Blitz in the Baseball category, FOFC Racing and Quiksand in “Other Sports” and Kodos and Quiksand a second time here in Football. He has three other nominations and quite a few other very good dynasties that didn’t get voted on, and he stands a good chance of going home empty-handed on Presentation Night. Sucks to be you, Blue.

Anyway, the dynasty itself was a novel one. It was nice to see some of the all-time NFL busts and short-career players “play” again. I was personally rooting for Christian Okoye “the Nigerian Nightmare”. What a great nickname! Anyway, this well-written and well-concieved dynasty is just another in a long line of greats from Mr. Blue. I’m not writing this one off completely, but – better luck in 2003.
GSG Odds: 9-1

Nebraska Blizzards, by Grid Iron.
So begins the Nebraska Blizzards thread.

Original, quirky and humorous. These three words sum up Grid Iron’s bid at a Golden Scribe. The dynasty reads like a cross between two of my favorite HBO original shows: First & Ten and the Sopranos. This is another case where a good dynasty will likely get passed over by the voters. Although as I alluded to at the top of this post, to become a finalist in this category is no mean feat. All of these guys have something to hang their hat on.
GSG Odds: 9-1

[Kodos]

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:

Now we come to the final category - Dynasty of the Year.

It's the Blitz vs. the Alien vs. the Legend vs. the Missionary vs. the Scarlet Knight. Who will win the FOFC Golden Scribes biggest prize? I think I know. The dynasty capsules are listed in alpha order. GSG odds to follow.

CM - Lincoln City, by QuikSand.
It should be no surprise to anyone that QuikSand has a finalist in the DOY category. What surprises me is that the Lincoln City was the one that was chosen. Don't get me wrong, it is a very good thread, but the percentage of soccer fans at FOFC is rather low. I think Quiksand's agent did him a disservice by not trumpeting one of QS's many football dynasties. Despite soccer's worldwide popularity, most of the academy voters are here in the States and "we 'Mericans like real football"! I just don't see a soccer dynasty winning the big one.

The 5 Great Men, by stkelly52.
As I've said before, the unique style/format sets this dynasty apart from all others and the voters may reward our man in Malaysia for it. Stkelly52 has a legitimate shot at three statuettes this year, including this one. Not bad for a guy who was a relative unknown before this dynasty started. If he does, in fact, win this award, it will prove that you don't have to be a FOFC superstar to get recognition.

Rutgers...The Birthplace of College Football, by cthomer5000.
cthomer5000 has many avid readers. In fact, this dynasty has lead many people back to playing TCY. Too bad he is up against some of the biggest names in the Dynasty Section of the FOFC. However, as the only pure TCY dynasty in the group, cthomer does have an outside shot at a GoldenScribe statuette.

The Bill Gates Challenge, by Kodos.
Kodos. How do we know that you didn't sneak your own dynasty past other deserving entries? How can we be sure that there was no hanky-panky going on in the nomination process? We can't. However.

It doesn't really matter. The Bill Gates Challenge was/is one the best reads of 2002. One of his players "Chuck U Farley" has a sizable fanclub and we even have a FOFC poster with that name. Many people hate the Dallas Cowboys and many more still hate Bill Gates. This makes for an interesting read. Who do you root for?

I am glad that Kodos is going to use a neutral third party for the counting of the votes. Although, he could always create a fake FOFC handle or find some other way to stuff the ballot box. He is from Chicago after all.

b]X-Com II: The Earth's Revenge, by Godzilla Blitz. [/b]
The X-Com dynasty faces perhaps its toughest challenge yet. Is it psi-powered aliens with blaster cannons? Or maybe X-COM agents throwing grenades at telephone poles? Nope. It is the FOFC academy voters. GB is trying to win a coveted DOY Golden Scribe award with not only a non-football game, but a non-sports game. Does he have a realistic chance of pulling it off? I think so.

About a month ago, the X-COM forces took on an alien base. GB teased us with the mission for a number of days. It was probably the most highly anticipated post I have ever seen in my time on these boards. Remember, GB has a large number of FOFCers hooked on the thread because they are part of the action. That is going to be very tough to compete against.


GSG Odds:
2-1 X-Com II: The Earth's Revenge, by Godzilla Blitz.
3-1 The Bill Gates Challenge, by Kodos.
4-1 Five Great Men, by stkelly52.
8-1 CM - Lincoln City, by QuikSand
9-1 Rutgers...The Birthplace of College Football, by cthomer5000.

Good luck to all the finalists!

'til next time
GSG

* note to self - Maybe I will crash the Awards presentation. That could be a lot of fun.

[Kodos]

Originally posted by Honolulu Blue:

LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD

Perhaps the most prestigious award among Kodos' offerings is the Lifetime Achievement Award. Unlike the other categories, balloting for this award was done in the first round, and since Kodos has not asked for a runoff, voting is assumed to be closed.

GoldenScribeGuy has allowed me to speculate about this award, since he is out auditioning for some reality show. Or is he chasing some actress wannabe? Whatever.

DISCLAIMER: Opinions are solely mine, and odds are given only for entertainment purposes.

In a perfect world, the nominees for the Lifetime Achievement Award would be...

Kodos
A fine dynasty writer and the creator of the Golden Scribe Awards. He has admitted that he received no votes, which is too bad. He deserved a few.
Odds: (no line)

stkelly52
His 5 Great Men dynasty has been nominated in the three biggest categories (Best FOF Dynasty, Best TCY Dynasty, and Dynasty of the Year), which is very impressive. Doesn't have a big reputation otherwise, which hurts. Scattered support but no more than that.
Odds: 100-1

Honolulu Blue
Modesty forces me not to talk about myself too much. Like Popeye, I am what I am, and that's all I am. Overall FOFC reputation ranks behind several others. A real longshot.
Odds: 20-1

Godzilla Blitz
Tied for the lead in finalists with 4. Widely respected in the FOFC community and a brilliant dynasty writer. Should be considered the favorite... for 2003.
Odds: 10-1

QuikSand
Is there anyone reading this that doesn't know this guy? Didn't think so. Has written many kinds of dynasties, all of them worth reading. A skillful game player, a talented writer, and an analyst without peer. He didn't get Saddam Hussein's 100% of the vote (I don't think), but more than enough to make him the prohibitive favorite.
Odds: 1-8

The field
Of course, I couldn't cover all the dynasty writers with just five people, and not even all the good ones. And there are some up-and-comers that should be taken seriously for 2003 and beyond. But collectively they have little chance here, and individually they have almost none.
Odds: 30-1[/b]

[Kodos]

Originally posted by GoldenScribeGuy:

Before I offer my analysis of the Lifetime Achievement Awards, I just have to get something off of my chest

[start rant]
All of you dynasty writers are a bunch of phony hypocrites!

:start whiny voice here:
“Oh! Thanks for nominating me, it’s such an honor…..or I know I don’t have a chance of winning, WriterX’s dynasty is much better than mine……or thank Kodos, for putting this together. I’m just thrilled that I have a shot of getting an award; even though I don’t deserve it”

Give me a break!

All of you want to win. Be honest. It goes against human nature to not want to be acknowledged.

Just look at the number of dynasty writers that added “finalist in First Annual Golden Scribes” or some other such drivel in their signature lines. Kind of odd to put that in there if you really don’t care about winning.

I prefer a signature line that has a witty comment like AnalBumCover’s “It’s an album cover”, or a good movie quote like SkyDog’s “The media don't understand the kind of problems and pressures 54 million come wit'!”. But I digress.

All of you readers know that if anyone knocks off Quiksand in a category, the winner will have a head the size of Roseanne’s butt. But I want to let you guys in on a little secret.

It’s okay!!!

Being recognized by your peers is something to get jazzed about. The FOFC may be a collection of a few hundred football/sport-sim geeks and it’s not like you can put a Golden Scribe Award on your résumé; but heck, if I beat out some of these guys I would be shouting from the rooftops myself.

So stop with the modesty thing. It is driving me crazy!!

[end rant]

- GSG