Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

[The C]

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2...o/060403_april

Some of them had me laughing.

The tv delay and Manny had me.

[DGetz]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

I love this one:

April 28 -- In Baltimore to play the Orioles, Mariners outfielder Carl Everett takes a trip down to Washington, D.C., to visit the Smithsonian. In an unfortunate occurrence, he is crushed by 1,500 pounds of dinosaur bones when a dinosaur skeleton display tumbles down on top of him. Luckily, though, Everett is uninjured because dinosaurs never existed.

[Brandon13]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

August 12 -- The Braves get a margin of repayment against former closer Dan Kolb, by unloading on the now-Brewers reliever with back-to-back-to-back-to-back-to-back home runs in the bottom of the ninth inning for a 5-4 come-from-behind victory over Milwaukee.

That one may be quite possible.

[dkgojackets]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

July 21 -- Vice President Dick Cheney throws out the first pitch before a Nationals game in Washington, but throws wildly into the stands, striking a 78-year-old man in the face

[Psyblast]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

LMAO...hilarious.

[Brandon13]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

July 4 -- Angels pitcher Bartolo Colon ends Takeru Kobayashi's five-year run as champion of the Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest.

August 3 -- Researchers discover that consecutive games streaks are often an early sign of Lou Gehrig's Disease.

August 10 -- Frustrated again with all of the negative media coverage, Barry Bonds brings his children with him to a press conference and says: "Look what you're doing to my family," while he punches them over and over in the shoulder.

September 8 -- Another Randy Johnson love child comes forward and sues the pitcher for giving him his looks.

September 14 -- With first base open in a one-run game in the eighth inning, the Cubs try to intentionally walk Dodgers first baseman Nomar Garciaparra by throwing pitches well outside, but the first one strikes Garciaparra on the tip of his nose, sending him to first.

September 24 -- Manny Ramirez tells Coco Crisp that he thought he looked better last year when he wasn't so tan and had long hair and a beard. Crisp informs Ramirez that he is not Johnny Damon and that Damon hasn't been on the team all season, after which Ramirez just stares blankly for a few seconds and then walks away.

September 27 -- Barry Bonds hits his 48th home run of the season, passing Hank Aaron on the all-time list and, in a scene reminiscent of Aaron's record-breaking blast, is joined by fans as he rounds second base. However, in a scene not reminiscent of Aaron's record-breaking blast, Bonds isn't congratulated by the fans, but punched over and over and over again.

My favorites.

[ILLCHILL]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

That entire thing was awesome.

[nyyanksfan20]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

All of them are pretty damn funny.

[MassNole]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

Awesome article.

[Saber]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

Might just be me, but there's a couple things that crossed the lines of decency like:

April 21 -- The Phillies re-sign Ugueth Urbina to a 10-year, $150 million contract after Urbina threatens to set general manager Pat Gillick on fire.

There's nothing funny about that what-so-ever.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

Yeah some of them seemed to draw from the Chuck Norris style of joke, but some of them were absolutely hilarious.

[cjonesfan921]

Re: Espn Page 2's 2006 MLB predictions

Those were good. I like this one, it is funny, partly because it's true.

April 19 -- Mets third baseman David Wright makes a fairly routine catch of a pop fly hit over his head in a loss to the Braves, but because he plays for a New York team it is called one of the greatest catches in baseball history.