Baseball cliches, explained

[Skerik]

http://www.hardballtimes.com/main/article/say-what

When they say: "They’ve got a bullpen by committee" what they mean is: "They invited 30 relievers to camp and in complete defiance of mathematical probability, they all sucked."

[bravosfan]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

When they say: “He's been through a lot to get back to this point” what they mean is: “He beat his kids, cheated on his taxes, impregnated the west coast, ate three reporters and singlehandedly put no fewer than 22 BALCO employees' kids through college ,and you're supposed to be all perky that he's hitting .300 on May 15.”

When they say: “Welcome to FOX’s coverage of the World Series” what they mean is: “Unless Tim McCarver gets laryngitis, your choices are the mute button or jamming an ice pick into your ear drum.”

[SPTO]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

When they say: “He’s underrated” what they mean is: “He doesn‘t play in New York.”

When they say: “He’s overrated” what they mean is: “He plays in New York.”

When they say: “The manager likes the fact he throws strikes” what they mean is: “He’s the only way we can get the outfielders to do wind sprints.”

Oh that's so true about Josh Towers this year.

When they say: “He’s gone from thrower to pitcher” what they mean is: “Two years tops and he’s toast.”

They've been saying this about Roger Clemens for nearly 10 years now!

[cjonesfan921]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

When they say: “He’s a player who values his privacy” what they mean is: “A guy from ESPN showed up at his house uninvited for an interview and they still haven’t found the body.”

When they say: “He refuses to give into the hitter” what they mean is: “He lacks the testicular fortitude to throw a strike.”

[ehh]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

When they say: “It’s not a level playing field” what they mean is: “We traded our best young talent for over the hill veterans, our general manager gutted our minor leagues for a 38-year-old ‘proven closer’, our fans are smart enough to see we haven’t got a clue and stay away, and we’re blaming the Yankees so folks won’t realize we’re incompetent.”

Sweet.

[dkgojackets]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

When they say "We like to have a lot of young talent to build on" it means "We don't want to pay real players"

[StabMasterArson]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

When they say: “He offers protection to the middle of the lineup” what they mean is: “He might hit 25 home runs but his 175 whiffs will keep him from hitting into inning ending double plays.”

When they say: “His teammates claim he's great in the clubhouse” what they mean is: “His teammates are petrified that he'll perform a prostate exam with a fungo bat on them if they diss him in the press.”

When they say: “They don't appreciate me here” what they mean is: “They gave our new free agent acquisition a ******** contract and now I want one even more ********.”

Nice find funny stuff.

[BunnyHardaway]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

When they say: “He‘s a veteran who still has a lot to offer” what they mean is: “Welcome to Kansas City—try not to suck too much.”

[Psyblast]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

When they say: “There’s nobody warming up in the bullpen” what they mean is: “That’s why you don’t diss your manager in the press, he’ll take revenge on your ERA.”

When they say: “He's got great raw stuff” what they mean is: “He can't hit the ground if he dropped his cap, but boy those three digits on the speed gun are fun to look at.”

When they say: “Our relationship with the MLBPA has never been better” what they mean is: “We haven’t told them what we’re planning yet.”

[BatsareBugs]

Re: Baseball cliches, explained

I think this is the norm for some teams:

When they say: “They’re in rebuilding mode” what they mean is: “Throwing money at the problem blew up in their faces last year so they’re going with Plan B.”