Nebraska State Senator sues....God

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  • Skerik
    Living in this tube
    • Mar 2004
    • 5215

    #1

    Nebraska State Senator sues....God

    Nebraska Democratic State Senator Ernie Chambers has decided to go straight to the top in an effort to stop natural disasters from befalling the world.

    Chambers filed a lawsuit against God in Douglas County Court Friday afternoon, KPTM Fox 42 reported.

    The suit asks for a "permanent injunction ordering Defendant to cease certain harmful activities and the making of terroristic threats."

    The lawsuit identifies the plaintiff as, "the duly elected and serving State Senator from the 11th Legislative District in Omaha, Nebraska."

    Chambers also cites that the, "defendant directly and proximately has caused, inter alia, fearsome floods, egregious earthquakes, horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornados, pestilential plagues..."

    Chambers says he isn't suing God because he has any kind of beef with the deity. He says the suit is to fight possible laws restricting the filing of frivolous lawsuits. Chambers tells KPTM FOX 42 News that his lawsuit is in response to bills brought forth by other state senators to try and stop lawsuits from being filed.

    "The Constitution requires that the courthouse doors be open, so you cannot prohibit the filing of suits," Chambers says. "Anyone can sue anyone they choose, even God."

    Chambers bases his ability to sue God, as, "that defendant, being omnipresent, is personally present in Douglas County."
    I think God might be in some trouble on this one. Please insert your own "there are no lawyers in heaven" joke here.

    In Kyle Rittenhouse's first interview since the acquittal in Kenosha, he sat down with Tucker Carlson to discuss his future plans.
    Helen: Everyone's special, Dash.
    Dash: [muttering] Which is another way of saying no one is.
  • Acid
    Mr. Brightside
    • May 2003
    • 16954

    #2
    Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

    Sweet.

    I can finally sue Judas for being a ****.
    Blind to this impending fate
    We let the world carry our weight
    It's back breaks with every mile
    But we all live in denial

    Comment

    • Herbsinator
      All Star
      • Sep 2003
      • 4573

      #3
      Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

      I read that in the paper today and I said to myself, "Yep, that's Ernie." He is always doing crazy stuff like this.



      Look at him...you just know he is crazy.

      Comment

      • nyisles16
        All Star
        • Apr 2003
        • 8317

        #4
        Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

        wonder what happens if he loses this case...

        Comment

        • Beantown
          #DoYourJob
          • Feb 2005
          • 31523

          #5
          Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

          I bet God offers to settle out of court.

          Comment

          • ex carrabba fan
            I'll thank him for you
            • Oct 2004
            • 32744

            #6
            Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

            Originally posted by nyisles16
            wonder what happens if he loses this case...

            Comment

            • Lintyfresh85
              Where have I been?
              • Jul 2002
              • 17492

              #7
              Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

              good stuff. I'd love to see the court room during this suit... I mean, who represents God? Or does his silence say it all?
              http://flotn.blogspot.com

              Member of the Official OS Bills Backers Club

              Originally posted by trobinson97
              Hell, I shot my grandmother, cuz she was old.

              Comment

              • PdiddyPop
                K*ngs *f th* D*nc*!
                • Dec 2002
                • 21768

                #8
                Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

                Are you kidding me? This actually got filed and tax payers have to pay for this? Give me a break!!!!!!!!!


                On the joking side of things......I like God's expert witnesses better than what the Senator can bring to the table. Does anybody want to mess with David? He triumphed over Goliath!!!!!!!
                President of the Devils Den
                (2009 Pre-Season NIT Champs/2010 ACC Co Reg Season/ACC Tournament/South Regional Champs/National Champs)

                Comment

                • Flyboy
                  Daydream Believer
                  • Jun 2003
                  • 11352

                  #9
                  Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

                  Originally posted by PdiddyPop
                  On the joking side of things......I like God's expert witnesses better than what the Senator can bring to the table. Does anybody want to mess with David? He triumphed over Goliath!!!!!!!
                  God's gonna have App. State as witnesses? Nice.
                  Originally posted by EWRMETS
                  Maybe the best post in OS's history. If you don't think Tony Romo is a Hall of Famer, you support al Qaeda.

                  Comment

                  • The C
                    Banned
                    • Apr 2005
                    • 7538

                    #10
                    Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

                    Originally posted by Herbsinator
                    I read that in the paper today and I said to myself, "Yep, that's Ernie." He is always doing crazy stuff like this.



                    Look at him...you just know he is crazy.
                    This is what Morgan Freeman would look like if he was a homeless vagrant.

                    Comment

                    • Brandon13
                      All Star
                      • Oct 2005
                      • 8915

                      #11
                      Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

                      Chambers bases his ability to sue God, as, "that defendant, being omnipresent, is personally present in Douglas County."
                      That part cracked me up.

                      Anyways, God should've seen this one coming.

                      Comment

                      • Beantown
                        #DoYourJob
                        • Feb 2005
                        • 31523

                        #12
                        Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

                        Really, though.

                        God is kind enough to let this crazy man become a senator, and he goes and stabs him in the back?

                        Comment

                        • Double Eights
                          Banned
                          • Nov 2005
                          • 5733

                          #13
                          ;/

                          Originally posted by Longhorn
                          Really, though.

                          God is kind enough to let this crazy man become a senator, and he goes and stabs him in the back?
                          God is all knowing. He knew before hand that he was going to be sued. It's all part of the plan.

                          I hope the guy wins. It'd make for a good movie some day.

                          "Ernie Almighty"

                          Comment

                          • heitkamp94
                            MVP
                            • Dec 2004
                            • 1285

                            #14
                            Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

                            This guy is always doing something off the wall, but I respect the point he is trying to make. People sue for all kinds of ridiculous things.

                            Comment

                            • The C
                              Banned
                              • Apr 2005
                              • 7538

                              #15
                              Re: Nebraska State Senator sues....God

                              Originally posted by Longhorn
                              Really, though.

                              God is kind enough to let this crazy man become a senator, and he goes and stabs him in the back?

                              Um did you not remember that God sent his son to be killed?

                              Who does that? So God is kind of an ***.

                              Plus, he condemned two angles to New Jersey. How much does that suck?
                              Last edited by The C; 09-18-2007, 02:53 PM.

                              Comment

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