Would you read this?

[Beantown]

I am just going to preface this by saying I wouldn't mind if this could actually be taken seriously.

My friend wants to write a graphic novel and since he is stronger on the artistic side of things, he approached me to help him with the writing aspects of the story. Since I, too, have been thinking about writing one, I agreed and asked him what he had in mind.

He gave me a rough, two page idea for a story and asked me if I could expand on it, flesh it out some and make it better. He sent me it this morning and I have been working on it for the past few hours, trying to build on his ideas and make them, in my opinion, better and more enjoyable.

I have attached what I have come up with for the background of the graphic novel. It's a rough written sketch, obviously, and clocks in at just over ten pages so I am not asking you guys to read what I have written with a fine-toothed comb, but I would not mind you to skim it over and tell me what you think.

I know some of you have read my work before and enjoyed it, so I wouldn't mind some feedback. Just keep in mind it is very rough, just the beginning, does not have much detail and all of that good stuff.

Thanks for any feedback you guys give me. Also, any suggestions on the artistic side of things would help my friend and I out as well.

[thegoons21]

Re: Would you read this?

Very comic-esque. I liked it though and would probably read. Although I tend to fall on more of a reality based super hero type.

Overall- Writing was great as always, story may or may not hook me personally. Depends on how deep you go with the characters. Didn't feel an attachment. I kept in mind it was only the summary though.

[Beantown]

Re: Would you read this?

Very comic-esque. I liked it though and would probably read. Although I tend to fall on more of a reality based super hero type.

Overall- Writing was great as always, story may or may not hook me personally. Depends on how deep you go with the characters. Didn't feel an attachment. I kept in mind it was only the summary though.

Yeah, it was just a summary, a simple background of the characters so I didn't get to delve too deep into any of them. I know, personally, any story I have ever written is driven more on character development and inner-workings, and since that is my favorite type of comic-esque super hero stories - I like the Batman graphic novels most due to the depth of character's emotions and development they go in, so you can bet that will be the focal point of my work.

Thanks for the feedback, though. I, too, actually feel like the background story (as it is presented here, I already have a few ideas to make it more personal a connection) is weak, so I want to work on that a lot.

[Lintyfresh85]

Re: Would you read this?

I'd definitely read it... I don't know how many of you know, but I write for a living, and not that my opinion means that much, but that was some good writing I just read. Guardian in my mind reminds me too much of Batman... of course I would need to see what he looked like visually, but from all descriptions he sounded like The Dark Knight himself.

As for Judas... I like it... I wanted to read more about him, and that's a good thing. I'd imagine he'd have some colorful henchmen for Guardian to take out along the way.

I think you guys should keep on working on this project, if only for the fact I'd love to read the whole thing and find out how the fight between Guardian and Judas goes down.

[Beantown]

Re: Would you read this?

I'd definitely read it... I don't know how many of you know, but I write for a living, and not that my opinion means that much, but that was some good writing I just read. Guardian in my mind reminds me too much of Batman... of course I would need to see what he looked like visually, but from all descriptions he sounded like The Dark Knight himself.

As for Judas... I like it... I wanted to read more about him, and that's a good thing. I'd imagine he'd have some colorful henchmen for Guardian to take out along the way.

I think you guys should keep on working on this project, if only for the fact I'd love to read the whole thing and find out how the fight between Guardian and Judas goes down.

He definitely draws a lot of his own stuff from Batman comics, which is something I am going to go into within the story itself. Since Colt is just your average, everyday person who wants to become some Icon, he takes a lot of his ideas from the comics he has actually read (Batman being his favorite). So the similarities in weaponry and style of fighting - deception, fear, etc. - are actually intentional on my part.

Thanks for the compliments on the writing. I'm going to have fun with Judas...I always enjoy writing psychotic sociopaths in my stories.

I'll also point out the first scene I'm working on is going to be a showdown between Judas and Colt. Straight from the pan into the fire, for lack of a better metaphor.

[Lintyfresh85]

Re: Would you read this?

Keep us updated on the story!

[Beantown]

Re: Would you read this?

Keep us updated on the story!

Gladly. Once I get the rough first scene written out, I'll send it out or upload it into this thread if people are interested in reading it.

[CMH]

Re: Would you read this?

Posting in this so I don't miss it when I get back tonight.

I'm going to check this out after work.

[Beantown]

Re: Would you read this?

Posting in this so I don't miss it when I get back tonight.

I'm going to check this out after work.

Let me know what you think.

[hardcor2]

Re: Would you read this?

I would read it. I like how you included how Batman seems like Colt's role model.

[Beantown]

Re: Would you read this?

I would read it. I like how you included how Batman seems like Colt's role model.

Thanks for the reply, man.

I'll probably have the first test-scene done within the week.

[aukevin]

Re: Would you read this?

I liked it. Put me on your list for when you send out updates. Sounds good!

[Beantown]

Re: Would you read this?

Just bumping this up in anticipation to a little sneak preview at the first little scene.

Just remeber, I'm writing out the story right now. We figure that's a better way - get the story written out and then work with putting them into panels with drawings and such, so the preview will be a word document...just under six pages long, it seems.

Let me know if anyone would be interested, or if I should just PM it out to a few individuals.

[Beantown]

Re: Would you read this?

Here's a six-page preview of the first scene I'm writing out...let me know what you guys think. Thanks.

I, personally, have mixed feelings about it. I haven't went back through it and read/looked it over (other than for glaring spelling/grammar mistakes) so I can't really comment, but we'll see.

[Lintyfresh85]

Re: Would you read this?

Once again some great work! It's very expressive and I had no problem imagining the world Judas and The Guardian live in. Can't wait to see the artwork to see if Judas and The Guardian look like I imagine them to!