Balls Out: The Gary Houseman Story

[sportsdude]

This is a movie that apparently was supposed to come in December but was pushed back to sometime this month or early February. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0787470/

I was able to see an "advance screening" tonight. In my 26 years on this planet I've seen a wide scope of movies including some great ones and some downright terrible ones. It is no exaggeration when I say this movie was, by far, the worst thing I have ever seen. If anybody here pays their hard-earned money to see then they deserve a kick in the balls. I honestly did not laugh once.

complete movie spoiled below:

Spoiler

so basically Gary Houseman (Sean William Scott) was from a tennis family but his dad hated him. He went to play in Mexico, left and eventually became a janitor at some school in Lincoln, Neb. The tennis coach (Randy Quaid) sees him hit some balls, asks him to join the coaching staff. Randy Quaid dies so Gary takes over as coach.

He somehow takes a rag-tag team of nobodies to the state tournament where the team captain wins a state title. There's a lot of swearing and lewd humor but at no point was it ever funny. In fact it mostly felt awkward. Including a scene near the end where Gary makes the team captain wear his clothes and both are naked (no penis is shown so that's a plus) in the locker room staring at each other.

I felt like the script was written by a 5-year-old and I am sad that I just wasted 1.5 hours of my life to this piece of ****.