Girl Advice...

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  • Peji911
    Sexiest Woman Alive!
    • Aug 2004
    • 2098

    #1

    Girl Advice...

    OK, so this advice isnt for me (thus I dont know all the details) but I would like some help.

    Here is the story. This guy I work with now, the same guy who trained me when I was younger in DJing), has been married for 11 years. He is now 35 with three kids and his wide is still 27, and very attractive I might add.

    Anyways, he works with me so we'll usually work 5am to 7pmish, thus that's when he is out of the house. He lives on the top floor of a house, and another family lives on the bottom floor. The guy who lives there always works for this company, but has a 20 yr old who doesnt work period, nor does my buddy's wife. Apparently, since about the same time that family moved in (about two years ago), shes been very distent. He says that since about that time, when he goes home shes outside talking to the 20 yr old and eats dinner with her kids before, and my buddy eats by himself (she wont even sit with him). Anyways, he also says they go months without sex at a time, she wont even let cuddle with her at night and stuff (sounds veeeeerry strange to me). The clincher is this: she keeps calling him at work to find out how long til he gets home and even then, tells my buddy to call when hes going home. Im asking this because he's been a jerk lately, and I finally had enough, asked him what his problem is, and he just started balling and gave me the info.

    Obviously Im very converned and believe that she is cheating on him. Around the house (which she often spends with the 20 yr old), she wears the most revealing **** and apparently doesnt even kiss her husbnad in front of the guy).

    Anywho, I was wondering of possible ways of catching her. We're at work during the day, 6 days a week, so our time is limited.

    Thanks Boys
    PSN: Peji911
  • Seether4113
    R**k**
    • Feb 2003
    • 536

    #2
    Re: Girl Advice...

    Originally posted by pf03ho
    OK, so this advice isnt for me (thus I dont know all the details) but I would like some help.

    Here is the story. This guy I work with now, the same guy who trained me when I was younger in DJing), has been married for 11 years. He is now 35 with three kids and his wide is still 27, and very attractive I might add.

    Anyways, he works with me so we'll usually work 5am to 7pmish, thus that's when he is out of the house. He lives on the top floor of a house, and another family lives on the bottom floor. The guy who lives there always works for this company, but has a 20 yr old who doesnt work period, nor does my buddy's wife. Apparently, since about the same time that family moved in (about two years ago), shes been very distent. He says that since about that time, when he goes home shes outside talking to the 20 yr old and eats dinner with her kids before, and my buddy eats by himself (she wont even sit with him). Anyways, he also says they go months without sex at a time, she wont even let cuddle with her at night and stuff (sounds veeeeerry strange to me). The clincher is this: she keeps calling him at work to find out how long til he gets home and even then, tells my buddy to call when hes going home. Im asking this because he's been a jerk lately, and I finally had enough, asked him what his problem is, and he just started balling and gave me the info.

    Obviously Im very converned and believe that she is cheating on him. Around the house (which she often spends with the 20 yr old), she wears the most revealing **** and apparently doesnt even kiss her husbnad in front of the guy).

    Anywho, I was wondering of possible ways of catching her. We're at work during the day, 6 days a week, so our time is limited.

    Thanks Boys
    hide a camcorder somewhere in the house/bedroom? have the husband go to their house shortly after one of her calls wondering how late hes going to be?
    Jesus saves

    PSN ID: seether4113
    360 GT: seether4113

    Comment

    • Peji911
      Sexiest Woman Alive!
      • Aug 2004
      • 2098

      #3
      Re: Girl Advice...

      Originally posted by tater_132000
      hide a camcorder somewhere in the house/bedroom? have the husband go to their house shortly after one of her calls wondering how late hes going to be?

      ya, but we work construction in the summer, well he works it all year, so he cant exactly do that... and he leaves at 5am.. i doubt they'd do stuff so early and cams dont last very long.... we thought about a mic recorder too, but same situation
      PSN: Peji911

      Comment

      • bergie56
        T*rg*t F**ld
        • Mar 2004
        • 3984

        #4
        Re: Girl Advice...

        Don't know if OS is the right place for a thread like this but I would tell your co-worker to confront (in a civilized manner) his wife about it all. I have never liked the idea of trying to be sneaky and hiding cameras/recording devices to try to trap a significant other.

        Comment

        • ndeezlo
          Fum police
          • Jul 2002
          • 3272

          #5
          Re: Girl Advice...

          Originally posted by pf03ho
          finally had enough, asked him what his problem is, and he just started balling and gave me the info.
          Dude loves hoops eh?
          TWITTERED

          Kid Rock, "I'm the catalyst for everything."

          Tumblred

          Comment

          • Jayhawk
            MVP
            • Dec 2002
            • 2565

            #6
            Re: Girl Advice...

            Originally posted by ndeezlo
            Dude loves hoops eh?
            Sorry sorry.
            Anyway, I didn't totally follow that, but he should discuss his concerns with her.
            Texas Tech, Red Sox, FC Dallas and Reading supporter

            Comment

            • Peji911
              Sexiest Woman Alive!
              • Aug 2004
              • 2098

              #7
              Re: Girl Advice...

              He has. Name me any woman that would be honest with her husband over cheating, expecially in this situation--im sure they are few and hard to come by. Regardless, she's having an affair, i think, with a guy who doesnt work, doesnt go to school, nothing--he is basically a bum living off his parents. So of course she'll deny it cuz if she told the truth, he'd leave her and she'd have no money (her cheating/having no job would mean he'd keep the kids and thus no child support)
              PSN: Peji911

              Comment

              • Jayhawk
                MVP
                • Dec 2002
                • 2565

                #8
                Re: Girl Advice...

                I mean about not eating together, cuddling and the sex withdraw. What's her excuse for all that?
                Texas Tech, Red Sox, FC Dallas and Reading supporter

                Comment

                • Peji911
                  Sexiest Woman Alive!
                  • Aug 2004
                  • 2098

                  #9
                  Re: Girl Advice...

                  Originally posted by Jayhawk
                  I mean about not eating together, cuddling and the sex withdraw. What's her excuse for all that?

                  I dono if there are more but a couple he mentioned were that shes not in the mood, she doesnt feel well, shes tired, meh. Apparently no sex for over two mths straight and when he gets it, shes all like 'ok, fiiine' type of stuff, and straight action, no foreplay
                  PSN: Peji911

                  Comment

                  • mike01
                    Banned
                    • Jul 2003
                    • 1180

                    #10
                    Re: Girl Advice...

                    Without knowing all the details obviously...

                    I would tell him to leave her. Hes obviously not happy with the way things are and as much as it might hurt to end it, he should be with someone he doesn't worry about and someone who makes him happy.

                    Comment

                    • Blaxican8504
                      All Star
                      • Jul 2002
                      • 4150

                      #11
                      Re: Girl Advice...

                      Sounds like her and the 20 year old have something going on.

                      He could ask, but she'll probably deny it.

                      Comment

                      • Peji911
                        Sexiest Woman Alive!
                        • Aug 2004
                        • 2098

                        #12
                        Re: Girl Advice...

                        Originally posted by mike01
                        Without knowing all the details obviously...

                        I would tell him to leave her. Hes obviously not happy with the way things are and as much as it might hurt to end it, he should be with someone he doesn't worry about and someone who makes him happy.

                        ya, but hes already 35 and has 3 kids.. and hes been snipped... even that he did for her
                        PSN: Peji911

                        Comment

                        • Peji911
                          Sexiest Woman Alive!
                          • Aug 2004
                          • 2098

                          #13
                          Re: Girl Advice...

                          Originally posted by Blaxican8504
                          Sounds like her and the 20 year old have something going on.

                          He could ask, but she'll probably deny it.

                          yup, he has and obv she has denied it... i felt bad telling him wut i thought, poor guy
                          PSN: Peji911

                          Comment

                          • JohnnytheSkin
                            All Star
                            • Jul 2003
                            • 5914

                            #14
                            Re: Girl Advice...

                            While it appears that "all signs point to yes", let me play devil's advocate for a bit.

                            -He says that she's "never in the mood", makes sense if she's raising the kids. That wasn't mentioned in your posts. If she's watching those kids 14+ hours a day while he's at work, and then he comes home wanting grub and sex...that would be a bit of a problem.

                            -Any thoughts about construction being the wrong field of work for the guy? How long has he done construction? I worked as a Civil Engineer for the Kansas Department of Transportation and during the summer those hours worked by contractors and crew were absolutely insane (dawn to dusk six days a week). It definately strained my marriage, especially when you take into account commute time.

                            -Don't be quick to jump on the affair train. It could be drugs (a 20 year old bum living at home...certainly possible).

                            -Maybe the calling is just genuine concern for her husband's health? I mean long commutes at varying times of the day, big city, small city, they can all be a point of worry.

                            -The lack of kissing in front of the 20 year old is also explainable...some people just don't like PDA's (public displays of affection). I personally find it tasteless seeing couples suck face in public. I have a two and a half year old and while some affection is fine (regular kisses, etc) full on heavy makeout sessions and such to me seem inappropriate.

                            -The revealing clothes are also possible signs of a mid-life crisis. Then again, you says she's attractive...so as users on other forums would say "PICS...NOW!". She might just like feeling sexy, you know women are like that (if not, look at your local high school some time).

                            Regardless, my advice would be for the guy to get to a lawyer first, before making any rash confrontations. Make sure the lawyer documents everything (how long it's been going on, suspicions, child situation, assets, everything) which will give him a leg up if it goes towards divorce. If he confronts her and things get heated, all the leverage swings to her, since she could claim fear for her life, etc. What's going on doesn't seem like a "marriage" and a lawyer (and family law judge) would see the infidelity, lack of emotion, etc. as major negatives on his wife.

                            Counseling would also be good, but to be honest, I think the lawyer should be consulted initially. He can then talk to his wife, but whatever happens...DON'T DO ANYTHING RASH! Don't talk to the bum downstairs, his parents, use the kids as "spies", etc.
                            Last edited by JohnnytheSkin; 08-05-2006, 10:30 AM.
                            I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be. - Douglas Adams

                            Oh, sorry...I got distracted by the internet. - Scott Pilgrim

                            Comment

                            • mgoblue
                              Go Wings!
                              • Jul 2002
                              • 25477

                              #15
                              Re: Girl Advice...

                              Private Investigator maybe?

                              I'm sorry for your friend...granted we're only hearing his side of the story, but when a relationship turns out like that it's really rough. It's also possible that she's not in love with him anymore, and that'd cut down on sex, etc too...
                              Nintendo Switch Friend Code: SW-7009-7102-8818

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