A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

[X*Cell]

These last few days of my life have been filled with regret and sadness about problems that I can't easily climb out of... I've worked two jobs in my life, and none of them made me a substantial amount of money... I've struggled through grade school all my life.

Fortunately and in my mind, luckily... I was accepted to Texas Christian, a pretty good private 4-year institution only to screw that up as well. After 4 semesters, I'm flunking. My parents demand that I attend school back in New York because they are simply wasting money by sending me to an out-of-state school. Can't disagree with that. I don't own a place, so I'll be with my parents until I finally can just get out. I don't have a car because I've never worked hard enough to get one.

Not only that, I just don't see how I can get back on my feet and try to lead that successful dream that I've always thought people could achieve. I'm really lost right now, and I'm 21 years old. I found out about my whole dire situation a few days ago. This was something I really need to get off my chest...

I haven't seen many threads like this in this forum, but I'm hoping my brethren in the OS neighborhood could help a neighbor out. I'm not looking for anything but words and advice. I don't want to be felt sorry for. I just wish I could figure out a way to get on my feet again.

[youvalss]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

I don't think moving with your parents is that bad because u'll get the chance to save some money (if u can get a job, and I'm sure u can). Whatever u do, don't give up college - just don't do it. If u can go back to school in Texas - do it, if not I'd say study in NY. And no need to worry, lots of students work a part-time job or something and save some money, espeacially if u live with your parents. Car? Well, I'm married and I don't have a car since I'm saving for something bigger, so believe me u can live without a car for a while, and u probably can use your parents' car.
But the most important thing is to relax, not to get in panic. U're young, u got everthing waiting for u. Just want it and work for it - and it'll happen. Forget the age, age is just a number. U just need to get yourself back on track, that's all. And if u think u've never been on track - it's your chance to do it now. Everything is waiting for u! Forget every1's expectations, build your own expectations.
Good luck man, and never give up, never!

[fishepa]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

No offense, but you sound lazy.

If you're flunking out of school you can really only blame yourself. Sounds like your parents gave you the tools to succeed and you're not doing much with them.

[Trevytrev11]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

Many 21 year olds are in a similar or worse position to you, Most are struggling in some way shape or form in college, or never even went to college.

My question is, why are you struggling in school? Are you partying too much? hanging out with a crowd that doesn't share your goals? girls? drugs/alcohol? or are you just not understanding the material?

If it's any of the first choices, maybe a change in scenery is needed. If it's the last one, than you probably need to figure out why? Obviously you have some ability as you got accepted to TCU, so maybe your study habits have changed. Mayeb you need a tudor.

Just keep with it. Everyone goes through something tough like this at some point in their life. It may be family, school or work and it may be at 10 years, 25 years or 50 years, but everyone goes though a rough spot.

[fistofrage]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

Well, when you hit rock bottom(Which you are a million miles away from because you still have family that cares about you) you just have to look at tomorrow as being the 1st day of the rest of your life. Make sure you have learned from your mistakes and go forth and conquor. Work harder, study harder, do as much as you can until you can't do any more. Do this day after day and pretty soon everything will fall into place.

[TheGamingChef]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

As long as you're in school, studying something that you want to spend the rest of your life doing, and you're actually trying (which sounds like something you weren't doing at TCU), you'll be fine.

If you think you were studying before, think again. A lot of people put maybe a half hour into studying each night, get a D or an F, and then can't believe they didn't do better. You've got to put in substantial hours into school work for success.

[stiffarmleft]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

Get off OS, it can be worse than heroin.

[Trick_]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

keep your head up homie...you recognize your in a tight spot thats the hardest part...maybe you can compromise with your parents to help you out with a car...by matching you or something. I've always said dreams were empty promises...but only you can make your dreams come true. I watched a friend of mine go through similar situations as you and he just had a sucessful movie made. If you need to talk man send me a pm

[bkrich83]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

Ehh, you're only 21. When I was 21 I was lost. I snapped out of it, and you will to..

Maybe moving home, and re-focusing your energy and efforts is just what you need. Sometimes a change of scenery is the best cure.

[fishepa]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

Ehh, you're only 21. When I was 21 I was lost. I snapped out of it, and you will to..

Maybe moving home, and re-focusing your energy and efforts is just what you need. Sometimes a change of scenery is the best cure.

I would have been in a funk too if I had dropped as many balls as you.

[Altimus]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

No offense, but you sound lazy.

If you're flunking out of school you can really only blame yourself. Sounds like your parents gave you the tools to succeed and you're not doing much with them.

I agree.

You stated your own problems yourself. You obviously aren't working hard enough in school to maintain a passing grade and you even said you never worked hard enough to afford a car.

If you expected to go to school, gets A's and have a Benz delivered to you, you're wrong.

Plus you're no where near problem city. You're only 21 and have a place to stay and parents support so you have lots of opportunities to get out of your troubles. Find what you want to do in life. Maybe you aren't passing because whatever you're current interest is, you aren't passionate about it. So find that, crack the books and work hard and you'll get to wherever you want to go. You just have to set your goals and find out what you want of your life. Maybe school isn't for you. Maybe you want to do something else out there that doesn't require the standard 4 year degree.

[KG]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

Damn X, sad to hear this.

It sounds like you lack motivation which is hard to suddenly get. Because of your situation you should be motivated to try a little harder. Lifestyle changes are hard man and going through BS only makes you appreciate things when they are on the come up.

My advice to you would be to be careful when moving home in regards to hanging around people who can only do you harm and bring you down to their level. I've known many of a person who took time off from school to get their ish straight only to hang around the same knuckleheads who havent done jack since high school and end up doing nothing with their life. Like someone else said, just get a steady gig (which will occupy your time and keep you out of trouble) and take some part-time classes at a community college. Show your parents you have some drive, get decent grades that can transfer over into a different school and save some money.

I know you love music so maybe you should go that route, anything from working in a music store to some kind of industry internship/ "get your feet wet" position.

Best of luck man. Keep us updated homey

[Stumbleweed]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

If it's a struggle to succeed academically at TCU, moving to an in-state college (maybe a state or community college) would be a good way to get your grades back up and establish a solid academic record. In reality, where you do the majority of your coursework doesn't matter all that much for jobs because you can generally transfer into a better school if they see that you are trying and succeeding (if a good school is what you feel you need for your desired career). If you can manage to stay on track at a smaller, less-expensive school, then you would likely be able to move to a higher-level university later and get your degree from them instead.

Anyway, I guess you probably need to determine if college is the right path for whatever you want to do. Honestly, some people aren't cut out for college life and should just try to find quality work experience or go to a trade-specific school (auto mechanic is a big one) -- paying a bunch of money for a degree that you may not ever use is a waste of time/money. Don't take this as "eh screw it, just drop out" advice by any means -- just really think about what you want out of life and look to see what you need to do in order to do it. Some career fields are education-focused and all you need to get an entry-level job is a degree in that field -- others are experience and knowledge-based and a degree won't do a damn thing for you.

At this point, since you seem kind of conflicted or unsure about what you want to do -- definitely don't drop out of school altogether unless you have a distinct course set that doesn't require a degree. I'd suggest taking your parents up on their generous offer and stay with them while you focus on your academics at a smaller, cheaper school. If you don't know what you want to do, maybe some course you take will give you an idea -- then you can look at transferring to a better school if you think you'll need a "name" degree for the line of work you want.

Hope that helps... I'm only 23, but I work for my University full-time, and giving advice on academic/ career choices is part of my job. It's really just about keeping your goals clear and realistic while making sure to put the effort in on your end.

[p_rushing]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

Honestly if I was your parents, I would be done paying for school and you would be paying for rent. My parents told me if I wasn't in school after I was 18 and I was living at home, I would be paying some type of rent that I could afford (I did end up living at home for 2 months after graduating but I was waiting for my job to start, so they didn't charge me). I have friends who still live at home and most of them don't pay anything and mouch off their parents. It doesn't teach you anything if your parents keep bailing you out. At some point you have to be responsible.

Your 21 and only had 2 jobs, which says a lot there. I worked every summer during highschool in order to pay for my car insurance (my parents bought me an old car). It sounds like your parents have helped you out too much. I would go home and be greatful that your parents are still willing to pay for college. Study hard and work on your grades first. If you are doing well and have free time, get a job. Start looking at your school for jobs on campus.

[mgoblue]

Re: A millionaire before 21... I am the exact opposite

I agree.

You stated your own problems yourself. You obviously aren't working hard enough in school to maintain a passing grade and you even said you never worked hard enough to afford a car.

If you expected to go to school, gets A's and have a Benz delivered to you, you're wrong.

Plus you're no where near problem city. You're only 21 and have a place to stay and parents support so you have lots of opportunities to get out of your troubles. Find what you want to do in life. Maybe you aren't passing because whatever you're current interest is, you aren't passionate about it. So find that, crack the books and work hard and you'll get to wherever you want to go. You just have to set your goals and find out what you want of your life. Maybe school isn't for you. Maybe you want to do something else out there that doesn't require the standard 4 year degree.

I think Altimus is right...maybe what you are majoring in isn't what you want to do for a living. You're hardly in dire straits though, bro. You've got parents that care about you deeply, still a good chance to figure out what you want to do, overall realize ish could be much much worse.

Sometimes I fall guilty to being a bit too hard on myself looking at the negatives in my life. I realize I have to step back and go "Man, at least I'm not that guy", and see that there are actually good things going for you too. It's all too easy to gloss over positives and concentrate on negatives.