'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the boards
Not a poster was slurrin', not even JJlinn;
The red cards were issued by the Madden forum with care,
In hopes that Ian Cummings would want to stay there;
The members were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Acid's sister danced in their heads;
And DKgojackets in his cell, and I in my domicile,
Had just settled down, but only for a while,
When up in the NCAA boards arose such a clatter,
I clicked open the window to see what was the matter.
Away to the subsection I flew like a corner,
Tore open the thread topic and stared like a foreigner.
The language and good points of the respected gaming vet
Gave the shock and awe of a Shaq free throw that was nothing but net
When, what to my wondering eyes could be read,
But Auburn Alumni, and eight angry threads ,
With a little old mouse, so lively and quick,
I knew in a instant that he must be ticked
More rapid than eagles his issues they came,
And he hollered, and ranted, and called them by name;
"Now, Robo QB! now, Poor O-line play! now, lack of bowl patches and Interceptions all day!
On 1-AA schools, on online dynasties! on inability to get a sack, on Operation Sports I demand my money back!
So back to the off-topic thread I flew,
With an arena full of nonsense, and Pjv too.
And then, in a twinkling, I read something spooky
The vomiting and sickness was induced by a thread from Dookie.
As I brought up my hand, and was turning around,
Down from the home page TJ came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his knee,
And his clothes were all tarnished with schnapps and his throat was with weed;
A bundle of infractions he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a k-9 just sniffing out the smack.
His eyes -- how they twinkled! his 4 teeth just how scary!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose was wide open just like a prairie!
His bearded little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the whiskers on his chin were fluffed out like a fro
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it produced circled his head like a wreath;
He was with Chubby and KDRE, a right mean old administrator,
And I cringed when I saw him, in spite of myself being a long time donator;
A wink of his eye and a click of his mouse,
Let me know that he would not tolerate my crap in his house;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And carded all of my posts with an evil little smirk,
And sticking his finger inside of his nose,
he farmers blew a wad and up the home page he rose;
His damage was done and him out of sight, but all that could be heard was
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."
Not a poster was slurrin', not even JJlinn;
The red cards were issued by the Madden forum with care,
In hopes that Ian Cummings would want to stay there;
The members were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Acid's sister danced in their heads;
And DKgojackets in his cell, and I in my domicile,
Had just settled down, but only for a while,
When up in the NCAA boards arose such a clatter,
I clicked open the window to see what was the matter.
Away to the subsection I flew like a corner,
Tore open the thread topic and stared like a foreigner.
The language and good points of the respected gaming vet
Gave the shock and awe of a Shaq free throw that was nothing but net
When, what to my wondering eyes could be read,
But Auburn Alumni, and eight angry threads ,
With a little old mouse, so lively and quick,
I knew in a instant that he must be ticked
More rapid than eagles his issues they came,
And he hollered, and ranted, and called them by name;
"Now, Robo QB! now, Poor O-line play! now, lack of bowl patches and Interceptions all day!
On 1-AA schools, on online dynasties! on inability to get a sack, on Operation Sports I demand my money back!
So back to the off-topic thread I flew,
With an arena full of nonsense, and Pjv too.
And then, in a twinkling, I read something spooky
The vomiting and sickness was induced by a thread from Dookie.
As I brought up my hand, and was turning around,
Down from the home page TJ came with a bound.
He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his knee,
And his clothes were all tarnished with schnapps and his throat was with weed;
A bundle of infractions he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a k-9 just sniffing out the smack.
His eyes -- how they twinkled! his 4 teeth just how scary!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose was wide open just like a prairie!
His bearded little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the whiskers on his chin were fluffed out like a fro
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it produced circled his head like a wreath;
He was with Chubby and KDRE, a right mean old administrator,
And I cringed when I saw him, in spite of myself being a long time donator;
A wink of his eye and a click of his mouse,
Let me know that he would not tolerate my crap in his house;
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And carded all of my posts with an evil little smirk,
And sticking his finger inside of his nose,
he farmers blew a wad and up the home page he rose;
His damage was done and him out of sight, but all that could be heard was
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."
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