I have had a huge crush on a co-worker for about 2 years now. Two years ago, when I first had feelings for her, I told her that I was attracted to her and wanted to take her out. She said , "I don't know". I also asked for her number and she again said "I dont know." I assume she was trying to signal to me that she was not interested but didnt want to hurt my feelings by being blunt.
Lately, there will be some days where she acts like she is attracted to me. For example, she will make extended eye contact with me and when I stare back she will tease me. There have been a few times where she will walk past me and crack a joke, then pat me on my shoulder or back. Then there are other days where she will barely say anything to me other than "hi" and if i try to converse with her, she doesn't try to keep the conversation going (she, even on a good day, doesn't ask me questions about me and try to get to know me), nor does she return my glances.
A few weeks ago, we worked from 9pm-5am the next morning. During the middle of the shift, I asked her if she would like to have breakfast with me when we got off of work that morning. She said, "um, i don't know..I will have to think about it." I said, "just let me know before the end of our shift" and then i never heard anything else from her.
I told another co-worker that I had tried to ask this woman out for breakfast and I was told that the way I worded it was not being direct and I technically was not asking her on a date. (although she had known for two years that I wanted to go out with her). I was told i needed to be more direct and made sure the woman knew i was still interested and that it was supposed to be a 'date'. I always thought when you ask women out you were supposed to say something like " would you like to have dinner with me? " or "we should have lunch sometime" and they would assume it was a date.
I normally wouldn't date a co-worker for obvious reasons but i can't get over my crush. I don't know why this is happening so i figured why not go for it so that i could stop thinking about her.
What should I do? Is she really playing games with me? Is she really trying to show me she is not interested and maybe she is afraid to say something out of fear that she may hurt my feelings?
This is driving me INSANE!!!
Lately, there will be some days where she acts like she is attracted to me. For example, she will make extended eye contact with me and when I stare back she will tease me. There have been a few times where she will walk past me and crack a joke, then pat me on my shoulder or back. Then there are other days where she will barely say anything to me other than "hi" and if i try to converse with her, she doesn't try to keep the conversation going (she, even on a good day, doesn't ask me questions about me and try to get to know me), nor does she return my glances.
A few weeks ago, we worked from 9pm-5am the next morning. During the middle of the shift, I asked her if she would like to have breakfast with me when we got off of work that morning. She said, "um, i don't know..I will have to think about it." I said, "just let me know before the end of our shift" and then i never heard anything else from her.
I told another co-worker that I had tried to ask this woman out for breakfast and I was told that the way I worded it was not being direct and I technically was not asking her on a date. (although she had known for two years that I wanted to go out with her). I was told i needed to be more direct and made sure the woman knew i was still interested and that it was supposed to be a 'date'. I always thought when you ask women out you were supposed to say something like " would you like to have dinner with me? " or "we should have lunch sometime" and they would assume it was a date.
I normally wouldn't date a co-worker for obvious reasons but i can't get over my crush. I don't know why this is happening so i figured why not go for it so that i could stop thinking about her.
What should I do? Is she really playing games with me? Is she really trying to show me she is not interested and maybe she is afraid to say something out of fear that she may hurt my feelings?
This is driving me INSANE!!!
.This "girl" is not in her early 20's ...she's quite older but that's not to say that she couldn't be playing the game you guys describe.
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