Going solo....

[Rocky]

What are your thoughts on going to a bar/club solo?

I recently had to try this as I was new in town and my only buddy went out of town for a couple of weeks. To make matters worse, I was coming off a breakup, there are literally all kinds of bars and clubs down the street from me, and I don't think I've ever been to a bar or club solo in my life.

At first it was terrible....I was all kinds of anxious and self concious. It was literally like "Everybody is looking at me and laughing at what kind of loser I am". But once I got a few drinks in me and was approached a few times, it was actually a complete 180. I think I was approached more than I ever have been by going solo. And it was much easier to strike conversation. After the bar closed, I talked to a girl who said it's much easier to approach a guy solo because they won't get rejected in front of your boys.

It's not something I would do again voluntarily, but it's really not bad at all....your thoughts?

[Marino]

Re: Going solo....

I do it every now and then. It is a lot easier as I only have to worry about myself, and can leave whenever. And it is so true, people will come up to me, I don't know if they think I am lonely or something, but I have met some really awesome people at bars when I rolled up solo.

[jeremym480]

Re: Going solo....

When I first moved to Pensacola and then to Baton Rouge, I didn't know a soul; So I went out solo quite a bit. I too would just resort to alcohol to "break the ice" and eventually someone would either strike up a conversation with me or I would work up the (liquid) courage to introduce myself to a table full of chicks. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't but, it worked more often than not. I actually found going out alone could be quite beneficial in a lot of ways. Here's three quick ones:

1) Most of my guys friends would wait on me to talk to girls. Once they noticed talking to one they would see that as their "in" and would try to sideswipe me. Going solo you don't have to worry about that.

2) Most of my friends were like magnets for trouble. Whether it be a fight for hitting on some random dudes girlfriend or getting to wasted and spilling their drink on someone. Something always seemed to happen. Again, by myself I didn't have to worry about that.

3) When you haven't had much luck with the ladies and it's getting late. You can go for some less that attractive girls without the worry of your friends ragging you. I mean, really who are we to judge anyway?

Anyways, my point is, I'd prefer to go out with friends but, going out solo doesn't have to be all bad. You only live once so, why not make the most of it?

[Gotmadskillzson]

Re: Going solo....

Going solo is where it is at. If you need wingmen then you need to step your game up. Sure it might be more fun going in a group. However there is a downside in going in a group.

That downside is women, at least half of the potential women you might be able to pull, will be turned off by the group setting. Especially if she is by herself or just have 1 friend, while you rolled up in there with 3 or 4 of your friends.

This is the common most made mistake by men in their 20s. They roll to the club and bars too damn deep, scaring off their potentiial pulls.

You just need one dude to roll with if you want to roll with somebody. Me I always preferred the solo route. Going solo projects high self esteem and high confidence level in yourself and women are attracted to it.

They check you out and say to themselves wow, check out that confident dude chillin, he must have his act together. Let me go over there and see what he is working with.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: Going solo....

Chicks really are such ridiculous creatures.

Anyway, I've never gone anywhere alone, but I always think about what I'd do if/when I move out to a new city. It'll be something I guess I'll have to do not just to pick up chicks but to make friends as well.

I definitely don't mind eating alone, so I can't see it being much too different.

[Hassan Darkside]

Re: Going solo....

Chicks really are such ridiculous creatures.

Anyway, I've never gone anywhere alone, but I always think about what I'd do if/when I move out to a new city. It'll be something I guess I'll have to do not just to pick up chicks but to make friends as well.

I definitely don't mind eating alone, so I can't see it being much too different.

Eating alone vs going to bars/clubs alone?

[TheMatrix31]

Re: Going solo....

Eating alone vs going to bars/clubs alone?

I mean, I'm sure its different, but in the end, it's the same thing. You're going somewhere alone that people usually always do in groups of people.

[Sublime12089]

Re: Going solo....

I actually enjoy it at times. But I dont club and like bars that are laid back where it is not seen as weird really to post up on a stool and drink a few beers and watch a game.

[CMH]

I've considered this and done it once while in Hawaii. But I felt incredibly awkward. It isn't that I felt pathetic. I just didn't know what to do. I had a beer in my hand and watched the band before chatting up with a few locals.

What do you guys do when you go alone? I'm assuming you eventually talk to people or they talk to you, but before that, you're just sitting there?


Sent from my mobile device.

[Gotmadskillzson]

Re: Going solo....

Well for me, since business is always on my mind 24/7, I just pulled out the cell phone and talked about business related stuff. Women are fascinated about stuff like that, go figure.

[Hassan Darkside]

Re: Going solo....

I mean, I'm sure its different, but in the end, it's the same thing. You're going somewhere alone that people usually always do in groups of people.

I gotcha. But I've never had any problem eating alone because when I go to eat, I go to eat. I rarely converse while I'm eating, just after. But if I go to a bar, it isn't just to drink. I feel like it's more of a social event, maybe because I'm a college kid and it's a social event for everyone else there.

[Aggies7]

I go to bars all the time alone. I work midnights and work weekends for 8 weeks at a time and my girlfriend has a normal 9-5 weekday schedule. Doesn't really bother me. I have no problem sitting at a bar just drinking but I guess its a little different cause I know a few folks that are regulars at the local watering hole.

[CMH]

Well for me, since business is always on my mind 24/7, I just pulled out the cell phone and talked about business related stuff. Women are fascinated about stuff like that, go figure.

You can have a conversation on the phone in a bar? I think my hearing just sucks. I say "what?" more than Lil' Jon in concert.


Sent from my mobile device.

[Buckeyes_Doc]

Re: Going solo....

You can have a conversation on the phone in a bar? I think my hearing just sucks. I say "what?" more than Lil' Jon in concert.


Sent from my mobile device.

Yeah I could never have a conversation on the phone in the bar. Maybe something quick but I hate talking on the phone in noisy areas as I think my hearing sucks and it is fusturating for both people on the phone.

To answer the OP's question I've gone to a sports bar a few times alone to have a few beers and watch a game. Usually when my wife is at work or out at town and I can't catch a game at the apartment. None of my friends in Chicago are into sports so I rarely go with them if I'm just going to watch a game. I always go to the same bar so I know some people there, and usually other people at the bar will talk to me.

The only problem I have is I'm not one to strike up a conversation with someone I don't know so I have to rely on someone else initiating a conversation with me. Drunk people usually talk to me.

[ProfessaPackMan]

Re: Going solo....

Going solo is where it is at. If you need wingmen then you need to step your game up. Sure it might be more fun going in a group. However there is a downside in going in a group.

That downside is women, at least half of the potential women you might be able to pull, will be turned off by the group setting. Especially if she is by herself or just have 1 friend, while you rolled up in there with 3 or 4 of your friends.

This is the common most made mistake by men in their 20s. They roll to the club and bars too damn deep, scaring off their potentiial pulls.

You just need one dude to roll with if you want to roll with somebody. Me I always preferred the solo route. Going solo projects high self esteem and high confidence level in yourself and women are attracted to it.

They check you out and say to themselves wow, check out that confident dude chillin, he must have his act together. Let me go over there and see what he is working with.

LOL Please tell me you aren't serious with this man?