The Dream Analyst

[VDusen04]

Re: The Dream Analyst

It's weird, but as I have gotten older, I rarely remember any of my dreams.

Obviously, I am unsure of what you know and don't know about dreams, so I don't mean to be presumptuous, but there's some effective strategies that often go a long way toward improving one's dream retention. With some small & easy adjustments, we can kind of open up a new world. Two big tips I use to remember my dreams on a relatively consistent basis:

1. Before bed, I'll consciously make myself think about dreaming. Not only that, but I'll think about how I'm planning on remembering my dreams when they occur.

2. I keep something bedside to record my dreams directly after they happen. Recall how many times you've awoken out of a tremendous dream you were certain you'd never forget, only to forget it five minutes later? Having a notebook or even a cell phone near your bed where you're able to record cliff notes of your experiences immediately will help cement those memories in your brain.

[TCM]

Re: The Dream Analyst

I remember one dream I had a while back that was pretty weird. I was at this haunted house event thing put on by the junior high school in the area. Everyone there were people I knew from high school, or at least thought they were, and there was this one kid who started insulting me for some reason. I don't remember who it was, but it was definitely someone from a grade below me. Now this kid had a total Justin Bieber look to him (Snap back and clothes similar) and he wouldn't leave me alone. So I turned around and punched him and he dropped. It was weird because in every dream I've had where I've punched someone it was very weak and limp, including this one, but for some reason he dropped and didn't get back up. So being the rational man I am, I stayed inside there and hid for a little bit and it blew over. I'm sure I'm leaving some things out, but this was a few years back.

Idk why I remember that dream, I've never once spoken or interacted with that guy at all.

[RockinDaMike]

Re: The Dream Analyst

I've had a couple dreams of me cheating on my gf lately. And in the dream I'm aware that I'm cheating.

I love my girl to death and she's the best thing to happen to me but deep down I guess I'm not committed yet.

I won't look into it deep though, I'll just enjoy getting some in my dreams lol







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[CMH]

The Dream Analyst

I've had a couple dreams of me cheating on my gf lately. And in the dream I'm aware that I'm cheating.

I love my girl to death and she's the best thing to happen to me but deep down I guess I'm not committed yet.

I won't look into it deep though, I'll just enjoy getting some in my dreams lol







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I would actually consider this the opposite of not being committed.

When I look at dreams, I like to ask why would this person have a dream so traumatizing to their real life expectations.

To me, you do love your girlfriend and don't want to hurt her in any way. That constant running in your head at times can leak just enough fear that you could somehow screw it up.

Consciously, we aren't aware of those little leaks. Or a lot of the time we push it aside because we know we are better. But subconsciously, it sits there and eats at you and comes up in your dreams.

I think your dreams of cheating are an extension of that small, insignificant fear. Your mind is acting out your worries but the relief is when you wake up, you know you never took that step and likely won't because you know how painful it is to yourself.


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[Blzer]

Re: The Dream Analyst

Okay, just had one last night that's kind of relevant.

There's a girl (two years younger than me) I've known since my junior year of college. I was actually her resident advisor. I've always liked her as a friend, but I really grew to just love the girl in every way. Not creepily, but like I could even acknowledge to her openly that she really was just so awesome in my life, but I never really like pushed toward relationship status, despite the fact that we were both single. It hardly crossed my mind for whatever stupid reason, but she is a perfect "take home to mom" person. I actually technically once did that when our family went on vacation to San Diego and I invited her to hang out with us. They loved her.

Fast-forward to about a couple of weeks ago when she met a guy she had been hanging out since October, and now their relationship is Facebook official. I congratulated her on it and such, and I am able to banter with her in online chats saying things like: "Way to make me super jealous lol." Small things like that, we love to jab at each other for anything. By the way, she lives in SD and I live up in the Bay Area. If it wasn't for this distance, I would have asked her out over a year ago. I truly believe we would be together to this day if we were not actually out of physical reach.

My dream last night had us both back at SDSU, but we are our current ages. We're living in the same dorm, and I'm now just personally and directly talking to her about "I wish I was your boyfriend." Like not verbatim that way, but something along those lines. She could feel sympathetic and such, but she knew her stance. Anyway, there was kind of this ridiculous moment where now somehow I'm at this ceremony where people can write a sin on a piece of paper, stand in a line, and at the front be forgiven of their sin by some dude as they throw it over some sort of precipice. I did that, and I can't remember what my sin was, but I know Samantha (the girl) observed as I had trouble throwing it over, like it was a part of me that I couldn't let go. Somehow, this was really touching to her I guess? She approached me afterward and was really apologetic, saying it's not working between her and her boyfriend, and she wants to make it work between us as her arms are around me and such. So the next bit we're back at the dorm chatting up a storm trying to make it work.

Suddenly, time passes by (a couple weeks, maybe?)... I check Facebook again and she's in a relationship with another dude. Not like in a "getting around" kind of way, but I don't know. It's like I turned autopilot on and once again never did anything about her being single, and she wasn't going to wait around for me being passive. It's funny though that the 'being in another relationship immediately' thing probably leaked over from one of my friend's friends. She was dating my friend, they recently broke up and I talked to her about it as she said he wasn't the one, then literally just like two weeks later (yesterday) I saw she was in another relationship. I was like: gee, that was fast.

Sorry for all of this, CMH. It's the only way I can talk it about, being as descriptive as I remember the thing and giving a back-story alongside it. I'm kind of tired of waiting around, despite my super busy schedule (as I've publicized many-a-times lately, I haven't even gamed since January... that's how busy I've been). Last summer when I had a softball tournament down in southern California, she was the only person on my mind that I wanted to hang out with. She had to stay in SD when her grandmother passed away at the time, otherwise I think we were going to hit it off for a night or two, and maybe things would have been different. Like I said though, she's the kind of person where like I really do say everything to her about how I love the person that she is. I remark how beautiful she is, I leave little heart symbols here and there in texts... I mean it just happens. At the time back when though when we were in close proximity, I just never really noticed that what I had in front of me was potentially "the one." I think she likes this new guy a lot though, and I think it's going to work for them. What sucks is that it takes a lot for me to truly love someone like I do her, just in that we got so close and comfortable as friends, and I don't like to rush relationships at all.

[CMH]

Re: The Dream Analyst

I think you already know the meaning of your dream, Blzer.

The most "important" piece is the writing of a sin and having trouble throwing it away, only to have her there to help you through it. Then suddenly you notice she's in another relationship.

You are very clearly infatuated with her (love, in a lot of like, however you want to see it) as you say and, again, as you've already said, you worry that you are way too passive to even make it work.

The sin is your mistake or this idea that you made a mistake by not approaching the possibility of a relationship when you had a chance. You want to let it go - as you've shown by being happy for her in her relationship and honestly viewing it as a strong possibility to last - but of course you struggle with it. Who wouldn't if they loved someone?

Her being there, apologetic, expressing some desire to be with you, is a creation of what your mind wants. You want to move forward but you also hope that she will, on her own, suddenly say to you: "I want to be with you."

But I think all of this is obvious to you. Perhaps you just don't want to acknowledge it because doing so would mean you're admitting you made a mistake? And there goes the dream with the writing of a sin and trying to throw it away. All of that is piling up in your mind.

As I mentioned before, I'm not going to offer advice on what you should do. I can't tell you that this dream holds something for you in your future. I think the best I can do is confirm what you already know or fear: you let her get away.

Sorry you're going through that, man.

[Blzer]

Re: The Dream Analyst

Sometimes I'm not good with confronting truth by myself. I feel like your analysis perfectly matches my situation without any faults (my honest descriptions partake in your ability to do that). Thanks for telling me something that... whether or not I might have known that before... I needed to hear.

Are my dreams always that literal or metaphorical? Not really. This one really struck me in a different way, though. The sin ceremony thing was really strange too, I can't throw a picture to you at what it was like. Totally weird dream, but man lately days have gone by where I'm realizing that I actually might have had something with her, and never thought much of it before. The worst part is these aren't things I just can't say to her, especially if she's with someone.

This isn't emo heartbroken Blzer, by the way. This is just me being able to spell my thoughts out, because I don't do it often with others.

Your feedback is very much appreciated, and actually was awesome.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: The Dream Analyst

Funny this thread was started. I hardly ever remember dreams so remembering is a rarity. To be honest I prefer not remembering them.

I just woke up and remember a dream I had. I was on a train/subway and there was a long platform off a freeway that we were exiting. It was a new construction but I thought I was getting off a familiar exit but I got off and it was some random place. I had my external hard drive with me and there were some chicks I went with to some pizza/video game place. In the same dream my brother was filming a wedding.

I realize as I'm walking into the place that I left my external on the train. I run back and climb a ladder to try and get to the train and I see it speeding off already. I ask the attendant "I just lost my external hard drive, I need it back" and he was like "Sorry, all possessions lost are lost. You should have secured it better" or something like that. I was like "but it's critical" and he's like "critical?" There were some dudes behind me on the ladder pissed that I was blocking the way and I turned back with a stare. Finally I gave up and got off the ladder and walked away, turning back to stare again at those pieces of **** and they came at me and I woke up before they beat my ***, lol.

So how's that?

[CMH]

Re: The Dream Analyst

Funny this thread was started. I hardly ever remember dreams so remembering is a rarity. To be honest I prefer not remembering them.

I just woke up and remember a dream I had. I was on a train/subway and there was a long platform off a freeway that we were exiting. It was a new construction but I thought I was getting off a familiar exit but I got off and it was some random place. I had my external hard drive with me and there were some chicks I went with to some pizza/video game place. In the same dream my brother was filming a wedding.

I realize as I'm walking into the place that I left my external on the train. I run back and climb a ladder to try and get to the train and I see it speeding off already. I ask the attendant "I just lost my external hard drive, I need it back" and he was like "Sorry, all possessions lost are lost. You should have secured it better" or something like that. I was like "but it's critical" and he's like "critical?" There were some dudes behind me on the ladder pissed that I was blocking the way and I turned back with a stare. Finally I gave up and got off the ladder and walked away, turning back to stare again at those pieces of **** and they came at me and I woke up before they beat my ***, lol.

So how's that?

The train ride is insignificant, but finding yourself in a place that you didn't recognize triggered some panic and a concern of yours.

Your hard drive is important to you, but it only represents something that is more important. Have you been experiencing any concern with potential loss? It could be a job, relationship, family member, something that you recognize you might not be able to hold onto yourself, though you know you'll try however hard you can to keep it close.

When you climbed that ladder, that was a representation of the effort you would make to retrieve something you kept close. I think it's interesting that you lost your hard drive because an external hard drive can be carried. For the most part, it's not very easy to misplace an external hard drive. You keep it close to your body (again, much like you keep whatever it is you might be concerned of losing is kept close to your heart) and unless you're seriously distracted, likely won't leave it behind.

But that's what makes dreams so interesting. Here's this item that, for all intents and purposes, can't be misplaced by you, yet, that's exactly what you did. You had a dream of the one thing you know you couldn't lose but you lost it, a reversal of the little control you might have in the real situation - and likely something that you can't stand to know.

Of course, there's someone there telling you that what's lost is lost. A subtle reminder that the effort you want to make might not be enough to prevent the loss. I think the words "You should have secured it better" is something you would like to tell yourself so you don't beat yourself up over it, rather than a warning.

The rest - like the impending beat down - is not important to this concern. Your mind just needed to fill the story since you were likely upset in your dream and it wanted to deflect that anger elsewhere.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: The Dream Analyst

Not bad, lol.

I'm always concerned about losing things. Whether it's people I love or physical things. I'm OCD. I check my cards in my wallet multiple times if I use it, etc.

The external hard drive was in my case that I'm in now. Has a handle and all that. Maybe I'm scared of my computer crashing again too, who knows.

I was distracted in my dream, because of the chicks and the unfamiliarity of the area I found myself in.

[VDusen04]

Re: The Dream Analyst

I found this thread timely as well, for a recurring dream I used to have throughout most of the 00's just returned for the first time in 3-5 years. In real life I went on a couple of dates with this wonderful girl. Things progressed very well, then I blew a chance to kiss her. Never got the chance again. So I always used to have dreams of getting that elusive kiss, and it was always associated with euphoria, but also great relief, like I could finally put an end to that desire. Always felt very real, leading to unpleasant awakening upon learning it wasn't so.

Anyhow, we'd lost touch with one another over the past five years. I thought she'd mostly slipped out of mind, hence the drop off in the dream. Interesting to have it pop back up, she's obviously still in there somewhere. Coincidental this thread came up in such close proximity to my little dream relapse.

[PVarck31]

Re: The Dream Analyst

Here's one for you, CMH. This is gonna sound crazy but I swear I'm not making this up. When I was younger, probably 15 to early 20's. I had a recurring dream that I was on the Titanic. It was dark and windy and my Uncle was there, who I am very close with, and he throws me overboard. And as I'm falling towards the water I see sharks swimming around where I'm gonna land. I always woke up before I hit the water.

Its been a long time, but I used to have this dream quite frequently.

[ASB37]

Re: The Dream Analyst

I have only one dream that I can really remember, as it was the only re-occurring dream I've ever had.

I was tied up in an office chair and in an alley with only one exit. I was rolling around in the chair trying to escape and down the alley was this huge beat of a dog/wolf. Everytime I would have the dream the dog/beast would be charging down at me as I frantically tried to escape and I would wake up at the exact moment the dog/beast would have jumped up on me.

No idea what it could mean as I love dogs/animals and don't really have any fears of them.

[TheMatrix31]

Re: The Dream Analyst

I find it really, really weird how everyone basically has the same dreams.

[Cusefan]

Re: The Dream Analyst

I have dreams where I'm back in basic training which is obviously pretty horrifying. Had one last night where the drill wouldn't let me go to the bathroom, I thought I was about to pee my uniform when I woke up and throught I was about to pee my shorts.