Operation Sports Forums - View Single Post - Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself

shugknight · 08-05-2013, 01:16 PM

Don't know how many times I've seen this thread and wanted to post my secret, but I was too ashamed and embarrassed to post it. But I'm hoping by posting this, I can get help from others.

I did a lot of dumb things when I was younger, but I did one thing that has affected my future so much, I don't know where to go anymore. After high school, I didn't go to college. After a few years working, I was finally persuaded by my family to go to a technical school to pursue something better. I didn't want to go and I didn't know how ready I was to do something like this, but peer pressure got to me and I went.

The first month it went fine, but then I developed some sort of anxiety/panic attacks. And I was afraid to go to class. I'm not sure why, but I couldn't make any friends, and I felt like in the back of my head that I didn't fit in with the rest of the kids at the school. I just felt like the black sheep of the entire school, and it got to the point that when I did go to class, I was really nervous and felt my heart racing a million beats a second. After dealing with that for a few weeks, I decided to skip a class.. Then another.. then another. Next thing I know, I'm basically not going to school, missing weeks after weeks of class.

The school, being as small as it was, never decided to call me about the path I was heading towards, and it certainly didn't kick me out. So I accrued the tuition for an associates degree, without ever getting the degree.

Being ignorant, stupid, dumb, whatever you want to call it.. I never bothered dropping out from the school either. so after 2 years, they finally "kicked me out" Soon after I was scheduled to pay my financial aid, and this is where the trouble began. I tried to pay it every month, but the bills started piling up and it lead me to a choice I had to make of either paying the electricity or my loans. I chose the former. I would still file a forbearance to try and stop the calls coming..

Once I would be able to save enough to pay my current balance, I would. But then the next month's statement would come in and it would be double what I would have normally paid. So once again, I couldn't pay it, forbearance, and repeat the cycle. This got to me, and finally, after stupid decision after stupid decision, I said forget it. My credit is already ruined, I'm going to stop paying.

Fast forward 5 years later, and I haven't paid my student loans. I'm afraid to answer my calls for the fear of a debt collector asking me for money. 2 months ago they started to garnish my paycheck.

It wouldn't be a big deal if I was just talking about myself, but 15 months ago I recently had a beautiful baby girl. And this girl has thought me to grow up, and has matured me into becoming or trying to become more responsible. Unfortunately, I can't fix my past mistakes. And now I'm stuck where I am now and I don't know what to do.

I'm working a good job, that pays well, but with the wage garnishments and my $2000 a month daycare fees, I'm struggling every month on saving money. I want to save up to buy a house for my family, but it's so hard. I really don't know what to do.

Does anyone have any advice? Financial counselor? Bankruptcy (which I heard was impossible)? Anything?

It's sad to think that everyday I wake up and wonder what my life would be if I could take the day back and never signed up for college/financial aid. PM me if you like. I just don't what to do anymore.

08-05-2013, 01:16 PM	#465
shugknight MVP OVR: 15 Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: Begins with a C, ends with an O and in the middle is HICAG.	Re: Deepest, darkest secrets you're willing to share about yourself Don't know how many times I've seen this thread and wanted to post my secret, but I was too ashamed and embarrassed to post it. But I'm hoping by posting this, I can get help from others. I did a lot of dumb things when I was younger, but I did one thing that has affected my future so much, I don't know where to go anymore. After high school, I didn't go to college. After a few years working, I was finally persuaded by my family to go to a technical school to pursue something better. I didn't want to go and I didn't know how ready I was to do something like this, but peer pressure got to me and I went. The first month it went fine, but then I developed some sort of anxiety/panic attacks. And I was afraid to go to class. I'm not sure why, but I couldn't make any friends, and I felt like in the back of my head that I didn't fit in with the rest of the kids at the school. I just felt like the black sheep of the entire school, and it got to the point that when I did go to class, I was really nervous and felt my heart racing a million beats a second. After dealing with that for a few weeks, I decided to skip a class.. Then another.. then another. Next thing I know, I'm basically not going to school, missing weeks after weeks of class. The school, being as small as it was, never decided to call me about the path I was heading towards, and it certainly didn't kick me out. So I accrued the tuition for an associates degree, without ever getting the degree. Being ignorant, stupid, dumb, whatever you want to call it.. I never bothered dropping out from the school either. so after 2 years, they finally "kicked me out" Soon after I was scheduled to pay my financial aid, and this is where the trouble began. I tried to pay it every month, but the bills started piling up and it lead me to a choice I had to make of either paying the electricity or my loans. I chose the former. I would still file a forbearance to try and stop the calls coming.. Once I would be able to save enough to pay my current balance, I would. But then the next month's statement would come in and it would be double what I would have normally paid. So once again, I couldn't pay it, forbearance, and repeat the cycle. This got to me, and finally, after stupid decision after stupid decision, I said forget it. My credit is already ruined, I'm going to stop paying. Fast forward 5 years later, and I haven't paid my student loans. I'm afraid to answer my calls for the fear of a debt collector asking me for money. 2 months ago they started to garnish my paycheck. It wouldn't be a big deal if I was just talking about myself, but 15 months ago I recently had a beautiful baby girl. And this girl has thought me to grow up, and has matured me into becoming or trying to become more responsible. Unfortunately, I can't fix my past mistakes. And now I'm stuck where I am now and I don't know what to do. I'm working a good job, that pays well, but with the wage garnishments and my $2000 a month daycare fees, I'm struggling every month on saving money. I want to save up to buy a house for my family, but it's so hard. I really don't know what to do. Does anyone have any advice? Financial counselor? Bankruptcy (which I heard was impossible)? Anything? It's sad to think that everyday I wake up and wonder what my life would be if I could take the day back and never signed up for college/financial aid. PM me if you like. I just don't what to do anymore.